Lecture 14: Close Relationships || PSY 203: Social Psychology

Summary

This social psychology lecture explores the evolution and facets of love and marriage across history and cultures. It delves into the distinctions between love and liking, introduces Sternberg's triangular theory of love, and discusses love styles. The lecture also examines the biological underpinnings of love, including lust, attraction, and attachment, and questions the longevity of romantic love and marriage, suggesting that while passion may fade, companionate love can strengthen over time.

Takeaways

• 😀 The historical perspective of love shows that it has been viewed differently across cultures and time periods, from being considered a form of madness in ancient Greece to becoming more associated with marriage in later centuries.
• 💡 Love is a multifaceted concept that encompasses emotion, attitude, and behavior, and can be described through the ABC model which includes Affection, Behavior, and Cognition.
• 🔍 The difference between love and liking is significant, with love involving attachment, caring, and intimacy, whereas liking is more about perceived similarity and favorable evaluation.
• 🌟 Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love suggests that love can take various forms based on the combination of intimacy, passion, and commitment, resulting in eight different types of love.
• 💌 Passionate love is characterized by intense emotions and desire, while companionate love is more about deep friendship, trust, and a sense of belonging.
• 💞 Agape, or selfless love, is the love style where individuals are concerned about their partner's well-being without expecting anything in return, often seen as the highest form of love in some philosophies.
• 🚀 The self-expansion theory posits that falling in love can lead to personal growth, increased self-esteem, and self-efficacy, as individuals integrate their partner's characteristics into their self-concept.
• 🧬 The biology of love involves different neural and hormonal systems, with lust, attraction, and attachment being distinct but interconnected systems that influence our romantic relationships.
• 📉 Research indicates that romantic love and passion may decline over time, but companionate love and attachment can grow stronger, suggesting that love can evolve within a relationship.
• 👫 Gender roles have historically influenced marriage decisions, but there has been a shift towards marrying for love rather than societal obligations, especially noticeable in the changing responses to marriage-related questions over the decades.
• 📉 Marital satisfaction often declines over time; however, the degree of decline varies between individuals and is influenced by personal factors and relationship dynamics.

Q & A

What is the historical perspective of love and marriage presented in the lecture?

The lecture discusses how love and marriage have evolved over centuries. In ancient Greece and Rome, love was seen as a form of madness and was separate from marriage. By the Middle Ages, love was not a significant concept due to religious constraints. However, in 12th century France, love became a quest, still unrelated to marriage. It was not until the 17th and 18th centuries that Europeans, particularly the English, began to connect love and marriage.

What are the different types of love mentioned in the script?

The script mentions several types of love, including passionate love, companionate love, and the different forms of love identified in Sternberg's triangular theory, which includes liking, romantic love, infatuation, empty love, fatuous love, and consummate love.

What is Sternberg's triangular theory of love?

Sternberg's triangular theory of love suggests that there are three components to love: passion, intimacy, and commitment. These components can combine to create eight different forms of love, ranging from non-love to consummate love, which is the ideal form of love combining all three elements.

How does the script differentiate between love and liking?

The script differentiates love from liking by stating that liking involves perceived similarity and favorable evaluation, while love involves attachment, caring, and intimacy. Love is seen as a qualitatively different construct from liking, with love involving a deeper emotional connection and commitment.

What is the role of gender roles in shaping love and marriage in North America?

The script suggests that gender roles have played a significant part in shaping love and marriage in North America. For example, in a 1967 survey, a higher percentage of women than men said they would marry someone they did not love, reflecting traditional gender roles and societal expectations. By 1984, the percentages had significantly decreased, indicating a shift away from these traditional roles.

What is the concept of self-expansion theory in the context of love?

Self-expansion theory, as discussed in the script, posits that falling in love transforms an individual by integrating the self and the other, leading to increased self-efficacy and self-esteem. It involves learning new things about oneself and growing through the relationship.

How does the script define the term 'romantic love'?

Romantic love, as defined in the script, is a form of love that includes both intimacy and passion but lacks commitment. It is typically associated with the early stages of a relationship where there is a strong emotional and physical attraction but the long-term intention to stay together has not yet been established.

What are the different love styles identified in the script?

The script identifies six love styles: Eros (passionate romantic love), Ludus (game-playing love), Storge (friendship love), Pragma (practical love), Mania (obsessive love), and Agape (selfless love). These styles reflect different attitudes and behaviors in how individuals approach and experience love.

How does the script address the biological aspect of love?

The script addresses the biological aspect of love by discussing Fisher's three distinct emotion and motivation systems: lust (sex drive), attraction (reward system), and attachment (pair bonding). These systems are influenced by different hormones and neural pathways and can work independently or in concert with each other.

What does the script suggest about the longevity of romantic love and marriage?

The script suggests that while conventional wisdom and previous research indicated a decline in romantic love after two years, newer research posits that passionate love and romantic love can be distinct, with romantic love potentially lasting longer. Regarding marriage, the script presents data suggesting that marital satisfaction tends to decline over time, although the extent of this decline varies between individuals.