Stop Putting Women On A Pedestal, Too Nervous To Talk To Girls & More Struggles For Men

Summary

In this video, Courtney Ryan answers common dating and relationship questions submitted by her followers. She offers advice on overcoming the habit of putting women on pedestals, encouraging a shift to an abundance mindset and focusing on compatibility rather than mere attraction. Courtney also shares tips on overcoming nervousness when talking to women and emphasizes the importance of practice and self-awareness. Lastly, she advises a viewer who confessed feelings for a friend through an anonymous email to focus on personal growth and confidence before seeking future relationships.

Takeaways

• 😀 Don't put women on a pedestal; it can damage your chances in relationships.
• 😀 Shift from a scarcity mindset to an abundance mindset for healthier interactions with women.
• 😀 Focus on whether you truly like the person, not just on trying to get them to like you.
• 😀 Take a step back and assess if your time and energy are being reciprocated in relationships.
• 😀 Avoid obsessing over one person (the 'one-itis') when they're not equally invested in you.
• 😀 Talking to women gets easier with practice, so step out of your comfort zone to gain experience.
• 😀 Women are just humans like you—don’t overanalyze or get overly anxious about talking to them.
• 😀 Nervousness is normal when starting something new; build confidence through continued practice.
• 😀 It's important to build genuine female friendships to better understand and interact with women.
• 😀 When expressing your feelings, be confident and avoid using anonymous means to communicate them.
• 😀 Self-awareness is crucial—understand your own actions and growth before seeking a relationship.

Q & A

Why is it harmful to put women on a pedestal when you're attracted to them?

Putting women on a pedestal creates an imbalance in attraction, making the woman feel like she can treat you as an option rather than a priority. This decreases the likelihood of forming a meaningful connection and can lead to unrequited feelings or one-sided relationships.

How can shifting from a scarcity mindset to an abundance mindset help in dating?

Shifting to an abundance mindset helps reduce the pressure to make one person like you, allowing you to approach relationships more relaxed and focused on compatibility rather than obsessing over winning someone's affection.

What is the importance of asking yourself 'Do I even like her?' when dating?

Asking yourself if you truly like someone prevents you from becoming fixated on them simply because you're attracted to them. It encourages deeper reflection on compatibility, ensuring that you're pursuing a relationship for the right reasons.

What advice does Courtney give to men who are nervous about talking to women?

Courtney advises men to practice and push themselves out of their comfort zone. The more experience they gain, the more comfortable and confident they will become in interacting with women, realizing that women are just people, not someone to be intimidated by.

Why is practice important in overcoming nervousness when talking to women?

Practice helps desensitize nervousness, allowing you to gain confidence and experience. Just like any new skill, consistently putting yourself in situations where you interact with women helps you improve over time.

What does Courtney mean by treating women as 'fellow humans' rather than idealizing them?

Courtney encourages men to remember that women are not perfect beings but regular people with their own fears, insecurities, and experiences. Viewing them as equals helps reduce anxiety and creates more genuine, comfortable interactions.

What lessons can be learned from the viewer's failed confession of feelings via anonymous email?

The key lesson is the importance of direct communication and self-awareness. The viewer's attempt to remain anonymous showed a lack of confidence, and the response (a no-contact order) was a result of not being upfront about their feelings.

What does Courtney suggest the viewer do after a failed romantic attempt?

Courtney suggests that the viewer focus on self-reflection and self-improvement. Building confidence and understanding oneself is essential before trying to pursue a relationship again.

How can focusing on self-awareness and self-improvement impact future relationships?

Focusing on self-awareness and self-improvement builds a strong foundation for future relationships. By being secure in oneself, you’re more likely to attract a partner who appreciates you for who you truly are, leading to healthier, more confident relationships.

What is the main takeaway from Courtney's advice on dating and building confidence?

The main takeaway is that confidence comes from within. Practicing, being self-aware, and treating others with respect allows for more authentic and less anxiety-driven relationships, ultimately improving one's dating experience.