How I deal with ANXIETY as a $100,000,000 CEO..
Summary
TLDRIn this candid video, the speaker shares personal strategies for coping with less-than-perfect days, emphasizing the importance of not overreacting to negative emotions. They discuss the counterproductive nature of trying to 'fix' feelings of stress or anxiety, suggesting instead to 'do nothing' and continue with daily plans. The speaker advocates for living by one's values rather than being swayed by emotions, and offers three practical approaches: setting aside time to acknowledge feelings, writing down thoughts to gain perspective, and reminding oneself that emotions are temporary. The video encourages viewers to accept the natural ebb and flow of emotions and to strive for consistency in their actions, regardless of how they feel.
Takeaways
- 😔 Acceptance: The speaker acknowledges that it's okay not to feel 100% and suggests accepting emotions rather than trying to fix them.
- 🤔 Reflection: Setting aside time to reflect on feelings without judgment can be beneficial for mental health.
- 📝 Writing: Writing down emotions can help process them more objectively and find a silver lining.
- 🧘♀️ Mindfulness: Reminding oneself that thoughts and emotions are transient can reduce their impact.
- 🚫 No Overhaul: The speaker advises against completely overhauling one's life due to temporary feelings of being unwell.
- 🛑 Do Nothing: Sometimes, the best approach when feeling unwell is to do nothing and let the emotions pass.
- 💪 Consistency: Continuing with planned activities despite feeling unwell can help maintain consistency and values.
- 🌟 Positivity in Negativity: Finding positivity in negative emotions can help improve one's perspective.
- 🌱 Growth: The speaker suggests that handling emotions better now than in the past indicates personal growth.
- 🔍 No Silver Bullet: There's no one-size-fits-all solution to feeling good; it's about learning to function despite negative feelings.
Q & A
What is the main topic of the video?
-The main topic of the video is how the speaker handles not feeling 100 percent, dealing with bad days or being in a bad mood.
Why does the speaker feel stressed in the video?
-The speaker is stressed due to work and personal issues, lack of sleep, and moving into a new apartment without being settled yet.
What does the speaker suggest as a solution when not feeling well?
-The speaker suggests doing nothing, accepting the emotion, and not trying to problem-solve the feeling of not being 100 percent.
Why does the speaker believe that problem-solving when feeling unwell can perpetuate the problem?
-The speaker believes that problem-solving can perpetuate the problem because it tells the brain there is something wrong with feeling anxious, overwhelmed, or sad, rather than accepting these emotions.
What is the speaker's approach to maintaining their values even when not feeling well?
-The speaker's approach is to do their best and not change their plans, regardless of how they feel, to uphold their values.
How does the speaker feel about the idea of overhauling their life when feeling unwell?
-The speaker thinks that overhauling one's life is not necessary when feeling unwell, as it's a natural part of life to sometimes feel overwhelmed.
What are the three go-to strategies the speaker uses when not feeling great?
-The three strategies are: setting aside time to feel the emotion, writing down their feelings, and reminding themselves that thoughts and emotions are temporary.
Why does the speaker set aside time to feel their emotions?
-Setting aside time helps the speaker to be present with their feelings and acknowledges that it's okay to feel that way.
How does writing down feelings help the speaker?
-Writing down feelings helps the speaker to be more objective and often leads to finding the silver lining in the negativity.
What is the speaker's view on the reliability of thoughts and emotions?
-The speaker views thoughts and emotions as unreliable and temporary, which will come and go.
What is the speaker's advice on how to function when not feeling good?
-The speaker advises to stop searching for a silver bullet to feeling good and to learn how to do things even when not feeling well.
Outlines
😔 Embracing Bad Days
The speaker discusses their current stress and anxiety stemming from work and personal life, including moving to a new apartment. They share their realization that sometimes doing nothing is the best approach when feeling unwell. The speaker emphasizes the importance of not trying to fix every negative emotion, as it can perpetuate the problem. Instead, they advocate for accepting emotions and continuing to uphold personal values and plans despite feeling less than 100%. They also mention the danger of letting emotions dictate one's actions, which can lead to a cycle of not fulfilling personal goals.
🤔 Managing Emotions
The speaker offers three strategies for managing emotions when not feeling great. First, they suggest setting aside time to feel and process emotions, which can provide a sense of control and help manage negative feelings. Second, they recommend writing down emotions, which can lead to a more objective understanding and potentially finding a silver lining. Lastly, they advise reminding oneself that thoughts and emotions are transient, and they will pass. The speaker concludes by encouraging viewers to live according to their values, not their emotions, and to continue doing what they planned despite not feeling well.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Feeling 100
💡Problem Solving
💡Acceptance
💡Overstimulated
💡Doing Nothing
💡Values
💡Overhaul
💡Mental Management
💡Silver Lining
💡Transience of Emotions
💡Rational Emotions
Highlights
The speaker shares personal strategies for dealing with bad days and feeling less than 100%.
The realization that often doing nothing is the best approach when feeling unwell.
Accepting emotions without trying to problem-solve them can be freeing.
The tendency to problem-solve emotions can perpetuate the problem.
Accepting that feeling anxious or overwhelmed is a natural part of life.
The importance of not changing plans when not feeling well.
The idea that not feeling good is a part of life and should be accepted.
The speaker's belief in living by values rather than emotions.
Setting aside time to feel bad can be a helpful strategy.
Writing down feelings can lead to finding the silver lining in negativity.
The reminder that thoughts and emotions are temporary and will pass.
The concept of not searching for a silver bullet to feeling good.
The necessity of learning to do things even when you don't feel good.
The speaker challenges the idea that productivity is impossible without feeling good.
The video's offer to discuss further on how to get things done when not feeling great.
The anticipation that the speaker will feel better by the next video.
Transcripts
what is up in this video today what i
want to share with you is what i do when
i'm not feeling 100 and how i handle
having um bad days or being in a bad
mood
and this came from a question that um
someone a few different people asked
which is kind of along the lines of like
what do i do when i'm not feeling a
hundred percent and
it's interesting because today for
example i'm
pretty stressed about stuff that's
happening both at work and personally um
i haven't slept well for a few days i'm
in a new apartment um that we just got
and i'm not settled at all yet um and
i'm kind of overstimulated and i feel a
little uh stressed and anxious and i
don't like that feeling at all
and so i felt like it was appropriate to
make this video on the day where i'm not
feeling well
what i have come to realize
is that the answer to what do i do when
i'm not feeling 100
is often nothing i think that's very
unsettling but at the same time i find
it very freeing because i think that
as entrepreneurs and ceos
we're so good at problem solving and so
when we don't feel 100 we want to
problem solve and a lot of the times
this is actually what perpetuates the
problem because almost what you're doing
is you're telling your brain
there's something wrong with feeling
anxious with feeling overwhelmed with
feeling sad instead of just accepting
that emotion
and
not being frightened that you have it
because in some way shape or form i
think anxiety comes from you know it
arises from different things but i think
a lot of the times it comes we almost
make it worse because we get anxiety
about our anxiety we get stressed about
our stress we're like why am i feeling
this way i shouldn't be feeling this way
like i'm the ceo i'm the leader i can't
have a bad day and that's just not true
but what i have come to realize is that
oftentimes doing nothing is the best
approach instead do your best that's
really what i like saying like i'm going
to do my best today i don't feel great i
don't know when it's i don't know when
i'm going to feel better right but i'm
going to do my best today and i'm not
going to change what the plan was
and the reason for that is because like
i said i think that then we train
ourselves either we train ourselves into
um not upholding our values because if
we say every time i feel tired every
time i didn't sleep well every time i
feel sick every time i am overwhelmed i
cancel meetings i don't work out i eat
bad food well that's 50 of life
so your life's not really gonna get
where it needs to go if you just do that
every time you don't feel good right and
you know i think that that's
um one end of the spectrum
the other end of the spectrum is that we
say i don't feel good i'm overwhelmed
i'm anxious i need to fix this right now
you know i need a new routine i need an
infrared sauna i need a cold bath i
needed this i need that and like to an
extent things help right writing things
down can help talking to your friend can
help but when you have to completely
overhaul your life because you know
maybe you've been feeling super anxious
maybe you've had stomachaches maybe you
haven't slept for a few nights like
whatever it may be i don't really think
that means that you need to overhaul
your life i think that maybe
there's things going on and you're just
feeling overwhelmed and that's just a
natural part of life and it's okay not
to feel 100
and so the answer to that question is
really nothing you know i try best to
live by my values and not by my emotions
or how i feel because how i feel changes
all the time and odds are next week or
the week after i will feel 10 times
better than i feel right now and then if
i
cancel everything i don't work out and i
eat badly because i'm not feeling well
now i'm gonna look back later and be
like dang i really wish i hadn't done
that because i kind of set myself back a
little bit and that's okay that happens
we all set ourselves back at times but
if i can catch myself and be aware of it
and not do it then i would rather do
that than the opposite i think that just
understanding and accepting that not
feeling good is a part of life it's a
fact of life like and i think that a lot
of the times if we are
leaders and we put a lot of pressure on
ourselves
for some reason you know we think that
we should also
be the ones who never feel badly right
and that's why that so many people make
money off of like high performance this
high performance that you know all these
things
and i have fallen into that trap as well
but what i've come to realize full
circle is that you just have to accept
that sometimes you feel shitty and
sometimes you get sick and sometimes you
can't sleep and sometimes you have
things in your mind and sometimes you
know you have stomachaches because
you're so stressed and all these things
happen to people and they're completely
normal
and oftentimes our resistance of them
our unwillingness to feel bad is what
perpetuates feeling bad
and so i like to think of it like i have
a feeling it's in my body
i need to let it move through my body
and out
and the way not to do that is by over
compensating for how i feel right now by
eating a ton of food by canceling all my
meetings by watching netflix by
buffering with something like that or by
you know going the opposite direction
and just making myself so busy that i
can't think about anything can't feel
the feeling and the reality is that
feelings are normal and natural and
if your brain knows that you hear the
feeling the signal that is being told
and you allow it to just be there then
your brain probably will stop sending
the feeling to your brain right to you
and that's what i've come to see is to
be true and sometimes it takes a day
sometimes it takes two days three days
four days whatever but it gets through
and eventually you feel differently
and so now when i say that you know i do
nothing
and i accept feeling shitty and i'm like
i'm gonna do what i said i was going to
do regardless of how i feel because
if i
give myself an out every time i feel a
bad way that's
quite a lot of time i'm losing so
instead i have three things that are
kind of like my go-to's when i'm not
feeling too great and it doesn't involve
changing any external circumstances but
it's kind of just like mental management
and so the first thing i usually do is i
just set aside time to feel shitty and
think about how i feel
um usually
i tell myself like i'll go through my
day like today for example i had six
meetings before i filmed this and i have
a break right now i'm gonna film this
and then after this i have like an hour
and so i'm gonna go on a walk and i'm
gonna feel like for like an hour
i'm going to let that happen then your
brain knows it's almost like okay you
have a designated time where you're
going to let yourself feel these
feelings
and for some reason that helps me get
through when i know that like i'm going
to have a time where i can address this
right and so i set aside like 30 minutes
just to think about it allow myself to
feel it or do whatever i need to do like
if you need to cry cry if you need to
scream screams you need to go on a run
go and run whatever it is um i think
setting aside the time to be present
with how you feel and to remember that
it's okay to feel this way it's
completely normal
is the first thing the second thing is
that sometimes um i write it down and so
this could be i'm writing it to a friend
like i'm texting friends being like oh i
feel like today this could be that
i'm writing it down to myself in a note
on my phone this could be i'm writing in
a journal this could be i'm writing it
to a coach you know whatever it is i'm
writing it down and it helps me to be
more objective right and a lot of times
i notice that when i start writing down
why i'm feeling shitty i also start to
find the silver lining because i'm proud
of how i'm handling the situation i'm
like i'm feeling shitty but i'm still
doing everything i said i was going to
do and i'm handling this way better than
i might have a year or two years ago
right and so that's finding the
positivity in the negativity
um
and then the third thing is that i
always remind myself i'm like thoughts
and emotions come and go so the one
thing i can rely on is knowing that they
are unreliable
and so they will come they will go and
eventually i'll feel something else and
i don't need to try and do things to
feel differently right um i just need to
let the emotion pass and it will pass
and i don't need to be scared of it i
don't want to be worried about i don't
need to be anxious about it like we all
have these terrible emotions that make
us feel like a bear is about to eat us
and just because we have those doesn't
mean we need to alter our lives it's
completely normal that is how i show up
when i'm not feeling 100
i think that for me
again this goes back to
living in accordance with your values
rather than obeying your emotions
emotions are often not rational they're
often not
um i don't look into them i'm not like
oh there's some giant deeper meaning
here i need to solve through trauma
therapy like i'm like we all are humans
we all have trauma we all crap it's
happened like
just feeling poopy today is what it is
like i don't need to look into it um
because oftentimes us over analyzing
ourselves and our feelings and emotions
uh perpetuates the cycle of not feeling
well rather than just getting on with
your day and remembering that you can
have a
day where you don't feel well and you're
probably actually still going to have
some times where you do feel good um and
then you'll have times that day where
you feel even worse and eventually it
will change it will pass and you'll have
a good day um and you'll have a string
of good days just like you have strings
and bad days and they're normal
and i think that
if i can give you one thing it is that
you have to stop searching for the
silver bullet to feeling good and you
just have to learn how to do things when
you don't feel good and i think that
oftentimes
i know myself in the past and i'm sure
many people now it's like you just think
well there's no way that if they felt
how i feel they would be able to get
that much stuff done
and i
challenge you on that thought and i
would actually say that they have just
trained themselves to feel absolutely
horrible and still get it done
so if you like this video i will talk
more on how to get things done when you
are not feeling great um and my guess is
that by the next video i make i will
feel much better than this video um so i
hope that this was enlightening and if
so go ahead hit subscribe i will see you
in the next one
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