The Non-Needy Networking Process (How To Make High Value Connections)

Dan Koe
12 Feb 202327:08

Summary

TLDRThe speaker, an introvert, shares their journey from college to discovering the power of social media, particularly Twitter, for personal and business growth. They emphasize that being introverted is not a barrier to success and that social skills can be developed. The script outlines a strategy for effective networking on social media, focusing on providing value and building genuine connections. The speaker encourages creators and entrepreneurs to leverage the digital world's opportunities, offering practical steps for engaging with others and growing one's online presence.

Takeaways

  • 😀 The speaker identifies as an introvert and initially struggled with social interactions in college, preferring solitary activities like playing video games and working on side businesses.
  • 🔄 Coming to realize that being introverted is not a barrier to social skills, the speaker emphasizes that socializing is a learnable skill, not a fixed trait.
  • 🚀 The speaker's perspective shifted from viewing introversion as an excuse to avoid social discomfort to recognizing it as a skill that can be developed for success in various aspects of life.
  • 💡 A tweet from Jose Rosado resonated with the speaker, sparking interest in online business and self-improvement, leading to a significant change in the speaker's life direction.
  • 🌐 The speaker highlights the power of the internet and social media, particularly Twitter, in breaking down barriers to networking and opportunities, which were traditionally limited by physical location and social status.
  • 💬 The speaker advises against common but ineffective approaches to direct messaging (DMs) on social media, such as generic greetings or immediate sales pitches, and instead promotes a strategic and value-driven communication style.
  • 🤝 The speaker introduces a seven-step process for effective networking, emphasizing the importance of providing value and building genuine connections over time.
  • 📈 The speaker shares personal experiences of growing an online presence and business through strategic engagement and networking on Twitter, leading to collaborations and friendships with influential figures.
  • 💼 The speaker argues that the creator economy and social media provide unprecedented opportunities for personal and professional growth, especially for introverts who may have been disadvantaged in traditional networking environments.
  • ⏰ The speaker concludes by encouraging consistent and value-driven outreach on social media, suggesting that even a small daily effort can lead to significant long-term benefits.

Q & A

  • How does the speaker describe their initial college experience?

    -The speaker describes their initial college experience as introverted and not being the first to engage in social or classroom situations. They mention that their friend group approached them and that they all started off awkwardly.

  • What were the speaker's initial feelings towards networking and public speaking?

    -The speaker initially disliked networking and public speaking, finding them off-putting and uncomfortable. They preferred to stay in their dorm, playing video games and working on side businesses.

  • How did the speaker's perspective on being introverted change over time?

    -The speaker's perspective changed when they realized that being introverted is not a barrier to social skills, which can be improved. They understood that using introversion as an excuse to avoid social interactions can hinder success in various aspects of life.

  • What was the speaker's initial impression of Twitter and how did it change?

    -Initially, the speaker thought of Twitter as a platform for politics and memes, and they deleted the app for about ten years. It changed when they rejoined and discovered valuable content from Jose Rosado, which resonated with them and led to their engagement on the platform.

  • How did Twitter influence the speaker's approach to business and networking?

    -Twitter exposed the speaker to high-value money advice and a community of like-minded individuals. This led to a shift in their approach, realizing they could contribute similar content and engage in networking to grow their business.

  • What is the speaker's view on the power of social media in the modern world?

    -The speaker views social media as a powerful tool that has removed traditional barriers to networking and opportunities, allowing anyone with internet access to potentially reach a global audience and build a successful career or business.

  • What is the speaker's advice for introverts who want to succeed in a domain requiring social interaction?

    -The speaker advises introverts to see social skills as something that can be improved rather than a fixed personality trait. They encourage introverts to engage in social interactions and networking as a means to achieve success.

  • How does the speaker define 'non-needy networking' and what are the steps involved?

    -The speaker defines 'non-needy networking' as a strategic and value-driven approach to building connections online. The steps involved include finding someone to DM, sending an inspired compliment, showing genuine interest, leading with value, getting on a call for deeper connection, following up with value, and finally following up with an ask.

  • What is the importance of providing value in the speaker's networking strategy?

    -Providing value is crucial in the speaker's networking strategy as it helps to establish trust and goodwill, making the connection more meaningful and beneficial for both parties in the long term.

  • How does the speaker suggest using social media to grow one's personal brand or business?

    -The speaker suggests using social media to grow one's personal brand or business by engaging with content, complimenting others, showing interest, providing value, and strategically reaching out to people who can help or collaborate.

Outlines

00:00

🤔 Overcoming Introversion and Embracing Social Skills

The speaker reflects on their introverted nature during college, highlighting their initial reluctance to engage in social or classroom activities. They share how they formed friendships organically and their aversion to public speaking and networking. The speaker challenges the misconception that introverts can't be social, emphasizing that being social is a skill to be developed. They discuss their journey with side businesses and initial forays into social media, including a failed fitness YouTube channel and a photography hobby. The speaker's discovery of Twitter and the influential tweet from Jose Rosado that resonated with them is detailed, marking a turning point in their perspective on social media's potential for personal and business growth.

05:00

🚀 Leveraging Social Media for Business and Personal Growth

The speaker details their experience with social media, particularly Twitter, where they initially lurked without engaging. They describe the 'aha' moment when they realized they could create similar content to what they were consuming. This realization led to a mindset shift, prompting the speaker to actively participate and network on Twitter. They discuss the evolution of networking, illustrating how the digital world has removed traditional barriers, allowing anyone with internet access to connect and create opportunities. The speaker emphasizes the power of social media for introverts and how it levels the playing field for business and personal growth, sharing anecdotes of successful individuals who have leveraged social media to build their brands and businesses.

10:01

💡 The Power of Strategic Networking and Building Genuine Connections

The speaker stresses the importance of social media for creators and businesses, advocating for a strategic approach to direct messaging (DMs) for networking. They critique common mistakes in DMing, such as generic greetings or immediate sales pitches, and instead promote a relationship-building approach. The speaker outlines a seven-step process for effective networking, starting from finding the right people to connect with, offering genuine compliments, showing interest, leading with value, deepening connections through calls, following up with value, and eventually making asks. They emphasize the long-term benefits of this approach, suggesting it as a foundational strategy for anyone looking to grow their business or career online.

15:02

💬 Crafting Effective DMs and Building Lasting Relationships

The speaker provides a detailed guide on crafting effective DMs, starting with sending inspired compliments and showing genuine interest in the recipient's work or goals. They discuss the importance of leading with value, whether through actionable tips, resources, or connections, even if one feels they have little to offer initially. The speaker encourages getting on calls to deepen connections, suggesting it as a powerful way to humanize interactions in the digital space. They also touch on the use of other platforms like Telegram or WhatsApp for more personal communication. The focus is on building relationships that are mutually beneficial and sustainable in the long run.

20:02

🌟 The Long-Term Play: Investing in Personal Growth and Networking

The speaker concludes by emphasizing the long-term benefits of consistent networking and personal growth. They advise on following up with value over time, maintaining connections, and eventually making asks that align with the relationship built. The speaker also encourages leveraging these connections for audience growth, suggesting strategies like writing tweets or posts that the connected individuals might find worth sharing. They highlight the importance of bringing one's ideal future actions into the present, such as practicing writing or DMing even without immediate payment, as a stepping stone to a successful future. The speaker ends with a call to action for viewers to engage with the content, subscribe, and explore additional resources for further learning and community building.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Introvert

An introvert is someone who tends to be more reflective and less socially outgoing. In the context of the video, the speaker identifies as an introvert and initially avoids social interactions and networking. The video emphasizes the journey from avoiding social situations to recognizing the value of social skills in personal and professional development.

💡Social Media

Social media refers to digital platforms where users can create and share content or participate in social networking. The video discusses the transformative power of social media, particularly Twitter, in the speaker's life, highlighting how it became a platform for personal branding, networking, and business growth.

💡Networking

Networking is the process of building and maintaining professional relationships. The video script describes networking as a skill that can be developed, contrary to the speaker's initial aversion to it. It is portrayed as essential for career advancement and business opportunities, especially in the digital age.

💡Personal Brand

A personal brand is the image or identity that an individual projects, typically online, which reflects their professional values and skills. The video underscores the importance of building a personal brand on social media to establish authority and attract opportunities.

💡Digital World

The digital world refers to the virtual environment where digital technologies and online interactions occur. The video script contrasts the opportunities available in the digital world with traditional, location-bound methods of career advancement, emphasizing the lack of barriers and the potential for global reach.

💡Content Creation

Content creation involves producing various forms of media, such as text, images, audio, and video, for online distribution. The speaker in the video shares their experiences with content creation across platforms like YouTube and Instagram, and how it contributed to their personal brand and business growth.

💡Influence

Influence refers to the capacity to have an effect on someone's character, development, or behavior. The video discusses the concept of influence in the context of social media, where the speaker leveraged the influence of others to grow their own online presence and business opportunities.

💡Creator Economy

The creator economy is a term used to describe the ecosystem where individuals create content and monetize their online presence. The video script mentions the creator economy as a modern space where introverts and extroverts alike can thrive by creating value and forming strategic partnerships.

💡DM (Direct Message)

A direct message (DM) is a private communication sent on social media platforms. The video script provides a detailed strategy for using DMs effectively to network and build relationships, which is a key aspect of the speaker's success in the digital world.

💡Reciprocity

Reciprocity is the practice of exchanging things with others for mutual benefit. The video script references the law of reciprocity in the context of networking, suggesting that by providing value to others, one is more likely to receive value in return, such as support, collaboration, or referrals.

💡Modern Mastery

Modern Mastery appears to be a program or community mentioned in the video script, possibly related to personal development or business growth. It serves as an example of the kind of projects and communities that can be built and leveraged in the digital world.

Highlights

Introverts can overcome initial social reluctance to build meaningful relationships.

College friendships often form organically, helping introverts find their social niche.

Public speaking and networking can be daunting for introverts, but are essential skills to develop.

Introverts can leverage social media to build a personal brand and connect with like-minded individuals.

Twitter, despite initial reservations, can be a powerful platform for introverts to engage and grow their network.

Engaging with content that resonates with you can lead to meaningful connections and opportunities.

Observing and emulating successful Twitter users can inspire and guide introverts in their own social media strategy.

A mindset shift can propel introverts from passive consumers to active contributors in their fields of interest.

The digital world provides opportunities for introverts to network and succeed without traditional social constraints.

Social media platforms have democratized access to opportunities, leveling the playing field for introverts.

Building a strong online presence can lead to high-value opportunities that were previously inaccessible.

Networking online is a skill that can be learned and mastered, even for those who identify as introverts.

Strategic direct messaging can open doors to collaborations and friendships within your industry.

Providing value and showing genuine interest are key to forming lasting connections online.

The law of reciprocity suggests that giving praise and value can lead to receiving it in return.

Leveraging social media for personal and professional growth is a modern necessity, even for introverts.

The creator economy thrives on collaboration and mutual support among its members.

Consistent engagement through direct messages can lead to significant opportunities and advancements.

Building a personal brand and audience on social media is a long-term investment in one's career.

Transcripts

play00:00

I'm an introvert

play00:01

at heart, and when I went to college,

play00:03

I was never the first to engage

play00:05

in any type of social

play00:06

or classroom situation.

play00:09

And even my friend group

play00:10

that I still have to this day,

play00:12

we kind of just stumbled

play00:13

upon each other in the dorms

play00:14

like they approached me.

play00:15

I forget exactly how it was.

play00:17

We were all awkward at the beginning,

play00:19

just getting to school

play00:20

and were like, Hey,

play00:21

you guys want to go walk to lunch

play00:23

or hang out?

play00:23

And then it slowly built in to this.

play00:26

Don't even get me started about

play00:27

speaking in front of the class

play00:29

or going to networking meetups

play00:31

to meet new people.

play00:33

Those just turned me off

play00:34

and every single way

play00:35

I wanted nothing to do with them.

play00:36

All I wanted to do was sit in my dorm,

play00:38

play video games

play00:39

and work on the side businesses

play00:41

that I was pursuing at the time.

play00:43

And this was before

play00:44

I realized that being introverted

play00:47

isn't about being an artist. Social.

play00:49

Being social is a skill,

play00:51

not a personality trait

play00:53

that can be improved.

play00:55

Yet people hide behind

play00:56

their introverted identity

play00:57

to avoid

play00:58

the inevitable discomfort

play01:00

they are going to have to face

play01:01

if they want to see success

play01:02

in any domain of life.

play01:03

Like it doesn't make sense to write off

play01:06

business or something else that requires

play01:09

some form of social interaction,

play01:12

whether it be in business

play01:13

or just relationships

play01:14

or meeting new people.

play01:15

Like thinking of yourself as an introvert

play01:18

in that way

play01:19

and thinking that

play01:19

like 50% of the population

play01:21

that is introverted

play01:23

just doesn't do those things.

play01:24

That is completely against the point.

play01:26

And so that was college.

play01:27

But now we're at the center

play01:28

of a new party, which is social media.

play01:31

And I tried to build a name for myself

play01:33

many times in the past.

play01:34

I started with a fitness YouTube

play01:35

channel, went on to create

play01:36

a digital art page

play01:37

on Instagram,

play01:38

even did some photography,

play01:39

a lot of photography, actually.

play01:41

If you go to the bottom, like scroll

play01:42

all the way to the bottom

play01:44

of my Instagram page,

play01:45

you can see what I'm talking about here.

play01:47

And then the next thing was building

play01:48

multiple agencies

play01:49

or just freelancing businesses

play01:51

and testing out different tactics

play01:53

for growing and selling on social media.

play01:55

And then that's when I stumbled across

play01:57

Twitter, of all places.

play01:58

Seriously, nobody really

play02:01

thought of Twitter back then.

play02:02

And I would argue that still

play02:05

most people don't now because I thought

play02:07

it was a place for like politics

play02:09

and half baked memes.

play02:10

And the

play02:12

since the day

play02:12

I downloaded it in like 2011,

play02:14

I just remember

play02:16

vividly scrolling on Twitter,

play02:18

not seeing anything that I liked,

play02:19

and then I just deleted it,

play02:20

deleted the app from my phone

play02:22

for like ten years.

play02:24

But one day when I decided

play02:25

to get back on Twitter,

play02:26

a tweet from Jose Rosado.

play02:28

Great person. Go follow him on Twitter.

play02:30

Go follow him everywhere.

play02:31

A tweet of his popped up on my timeline

play02:33

and it was some form of like

play02:35

heavy hitting truth, like a harsh truth.

play02:37

And I love that stuff.

play02:38

That's the kind of content

play02:40

that I really like, is like, Hey,

play02:42

stop being a little bitch

play02:43

and go do this shit.

play02:44

I'm pretty sure that that was Jose's

play02:46

thing at the time is like,

play02:47

stop being a little bitch.

play02:48

And so

play02:49

that resonated really well with me.

play02:51

And so I followed him

play02:52

and I realized that he wasn't

play02:53

just talking about self-improvement,

play02:55

He was talking about online business,

play02:57

which was what I was interested in too.

play02:59

So I was like, Oh, this is a steal.

play03:00

This guy's talking about

play03:01

both self-improvement

play03:02

and online business.

play03:04

And then by following him, more accounts

play03:07

got exposed to my feed, either

play03:08

from people that he retweeted

play03:10

or that I just

play03:11

came across in the replies.

play03:12

Or you know,

play03:13

how you find people on social media.

play03:15

It's kind of just

play03:16

like the network effect.

play03:18

And before I knew it,

play03:19

I was drowning in high

play03:20

value money, Twitter advice.

play03:23

And then on Twitter,

play03:23

I lurked without engaging

play03:25

or doing anything.

play03:26

That's the type of person I am.

play03:27

I just don't like engaging.

play03:29

I don't like commenting.

play03:30

I'm an introvert, right?

play03:31

I didn't want anything to do with it.

play03:32

So I just lurked for like six months

play03:35

until I finally realized, like,

play03:36

it just hit me all at once.

play03:38

I'm like,

play03:38

all of these people are writing

play03:41

the same exact tweets

play03:42

that I could be writing.

play03:43

Like, I enjoy this content

play03:44

because I could do the same thing.

play03:46

They're confirming my beliefs,

play03:48

and so

play03:49

why am I just sitting here

play03:50

consuming when I could be

play03:51

doing the same exact thing?

play03:53

Because they were clearly getting leads,

play03:55

follower sales, they were growing

play03:57

and actually making an income doing it.

play03:59

And all it took took

play04:00

was a little mindset shift

play04:02

or shift in perception

play04:03

to see from that lens of

play04:05

Why am I not doing this same exact thing?

play04:07

I can do all of this.

play04:08

And so that alone,

play04:10

it sounds cliche,

play04:11

but that alone change

play04:12

the direction of my life.

play04:14

So here is a graphic

play04:15

to illustrate that

play04:16

the digital world has no barriers.

play04:20

We can see

play04:21

this is the evolution of networking

play04:23

where 20 years ago

play04:24

you need college network,

play04:25

location, professional status

play04:27

in order to get opportunity.

play04:29

Today,

play04:30

all you really need

play04:31

is the Internet,

play04:32

because in the past,

play04:33

the only way to the top was your network,

play04:36

and your network

play04:37

was limited by your physical location

play04:39

or the college,

play04:40

the prestigious college that you went to

play04:42

and climbing your way up the ladder.

play04:44

Then introverts didn't stand a chance,

play04:45

especially me at that time.

play04:47

If I would have gone

play04:48

to college in the past,

play04:48

I would have been fucked.

play04:49

I would have been out of a job.

play04:50

I wouldn't have been doing anything

play04:52

because I wouldn't be social enough

play04:54

to actually make that happen.

play04:55

So in the past

play04:56

you couldn't like

play04:57

we take this for granted.

play04:58

We don't actually sit and think about it,

play05:00

but you can deem a celebrity.

play05:02

And if your dream is good,

play05:03

like if you're a good persuasive writer,

play05:05

which is a skill, right?

play05:07

It's not like just

play05:08

nobody gets access to these celebrities,

play05:10

the people you want to dim

play05:13

their is a string of words

play05:15

that you can say

play05:16

that will get them to respond.

play05:18

And even in a like a freelance

play05:19

or an agency owner,

play05:21

their case in the past

play05:23

you wouldn't be able to just DM a client,

play05:25

walk them through some kind of like

play05:28

strategize messaging

play05:29

to open them up to your service

play05:31

and then get them to pay you

play05:32

2500, 5000, 10,000.

play05:34

I know some people

play05:35

are even charging $60,000

play05:37

for services through the DMS.

play05:39

Do you not see how fucking insane

play05:41

that is?

play05:42

Like most people would kill

play05:43

for a $60,000.

play05:45

So if you can just upskill yourself

play05:46

a little bit for 3 to 6 months

play05:48

in order to be able

play05:49

to create a freelancing

play05:50

consulting coaching service

play05:51

from the start,

play05:52

start reaching out to people

play05:54

because the digital world has no barriers

play05:56

and then pull in an income for yourself

play05:58

by charging low like 500 to 1000.

play06:01

Getting results,

play06:02

improving your skill stack,

play06:04

charging more,

play06:05

learning how to create a system

play06:06

that solves a specific problem

play06:07

within a specific niche,

play06:09

and then charging

play06:09

even more to get more results.

play06:11

And then by that time,

play06:12

if you're growing an audience,

play06:13

then you productized.

play06:14

Like it's very clear

play06:15

what people should be doing.

play06:17

But this is all modern.

play06:19

In the past you had to go to school,

play06:20

you had to get good grades,

play06:21

you had to apply

play06:22

to a prestigious college, get accepted,

play06:25

and then do all of this

play06:26

fancy work

play06:26

to become like rise

play06:28

to the top of the ladder in whatever

play06:31

compartment or department

play06:33

of that education you wanted to go into.

play06:35

And then you had to be extroverted

play06:37

enough to actually form

play06:38

real connections with these people

play06:40

so that they would pass

play06:41

opportunities off to you

play06:42

rather than the next guy.

play06:44

And so in the past,

play06:45

people had to work their ass off

play06:46

in order

play06:47

to get the limited opportunities

play06:49

that were available.

play06:50

But now there's just an overabundance

play06:52

of opportunities

play06:53

and options

play06:54

that make people overwhelmed, uncertain,

play06:56

and so they flocked

play06:57

to the secure career systems.

play07:01

You could call them,

play07:02

that have been developed over

play07:03

time, that the schools are tight,

play07:05

tightly closed with.

play07:06

And so think about it.

play07:07

The person that you read

play07:08

just now in the comments,

play07:10

they need a website

play07:11

and you could fulfill that service.

play07:13

And the tweet that you just scrolled by,

play07:14

that guy needs a video editor

play07:16

and the person on some subreddit.

play07:18

They want to learn how to be happy.

play07:20

They have a problem in their life.

play07:22

They're not sure how to solve it,

play07:23

and maybe you can come in and help them.

play07:25

The Internet gives you indirect access

play07:27

to the 4.9 billion people that are on it

play07:31

and all it takes

play07:31

is one piece of content, right?

play07:33

This is all media.

play07:34

This is all content

play07:35

where it takes one piece of content

play07:37

for someone to

play07:39

like just it'll just land

play07:40

somewhere, right?

play07:41

Let's say it was a good piece of content.

play07:42

Someone retweeted it,

play07:44

then a big account saw it,

play07:45

they retweeted it,

play07:46

and then another huge account

play07:47

saw it, got put on a a meme page.

play07:49

Maybe it got mentioned in the news.

play07:50

This is like way overly optimal case,

play07:52

but this can happen to anyone, right?

play07:54

It's just a matter of learning

play07:55

how to write a good piece of media

play07:59

and then having it

play08:00

spread to whatever

play08:02

part of the internet you could get to.

play08:04

And then people know your name.

play08:05

People start to know what you do,

play08:06

and then

play08:07

if you attract them to your audience

play08:08

and you have content going for you,

play08:10

then you nurture them.

play08:12

They get to know you more.

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And then if you eventually have a product

play08:15

or service that you can offer them

play08:17

in order to pull in an income.

play08:18

So networking,

play08:20

even though I don't like that

play08:21

word networking, just

play08:23

I like making

play08:24

friends is a better way to put it.

play08:25

But networking

play08:26

is the pillar of my success.

play08:28

Jose Rosado was the first person

play08:30

that I reached out to from my memory.

play08:32

I ended up signing on

play08:34

to his coaching program,

play08:35

which was a great program.

play08:36

This was like three years ago.

play08:38

And the cool thing is about this

play08:39

is that both Jose

play08:40

and I were in like slightly different

play08:42

niches kind of

play08:43

we talk about some same things,

play08:45

we talk about some different things,

play08:47

but that just goes to show

play08:48

that like people can be unique

play08:50

even if we're in very similar domains.

play08:52

And so another example is Joey Justice.

play08:54

If you're in modern Mastery,

play08:55

you know who Joey is.

play08:56

If you're on Twitter,

play08:57

you probably know who Joey is.

play08:58

But we hit it off

play09:00

like way back when,

play09:01

when we first both started on Twitter

play09:03

and now I'm

play09:04

flying out to see him in early March.

play09:06

I'm I've seen him multiple times.

play09:09

He's a very good friend of mine.

play09:11

And it's just crazy

play09:12

what happens when you start

play09:13

actually putting yourself out there.

play09:15

And we helped each other

play09:16

with our services at the start.

play09:18

I helped him get his

play09:20

I like offered my services to him

play09:22

for free

play09:22

in order for him

play09:23

to get a testimonial for me

play09:24

and to just make his better.

play09:26

And he offered coaching to me.

play09:27

So it's like vise versa.

play09:29

That's kind of how it works.

play09:31

And the creator economy is

play09:32

you just make friends,

play09:33

you help each other,

play09:34

and then you use those strategies

play09:35

to help others.

play09:36

And even last year,

play09:37

I moved to Texas with Dakota

play09:39

Robertson and Jake Molina

play09:41

that I met on Twitter.

play09:41

And I've also met great people

play09:43

like Justin Wells, Shaquille Bloom,

play09:45

Dicky Bush.

play09:46

I had dinner with Dicky

play09:48

Bush like a few weeks ago.

play09:49

I've talked with others.

play09:50

It's just genuinely insane.

play09:52

What kind of like minded people

play09:54

that are ambitious in life and achieving

play09:56

good things?

play09:57

You can find on the Internet

play09:59

if you actually look for them.

play10:01

Because most people don't approach

play10:02

social media with this mindset.

play10:04

They approach

play10:05

social media with the mindset of,

play10:06

I want to be educated and entertained.

play10:08

They it doesn't even cross their mind

play10:10

that they could reach out to this person

play10:12

and become friends with them.

play10:13

I'm talking about like people

play10:15

that are within

play10:16

a similar follower

play10:16

range as them and then grow together

play10:20

and offer their value

play10:22

in front of potentially 4.9

play10:24

billion people on the Internet.

play10:26

So if you're in this creator game

play10:27

or this one person business game,

play10:29

if you're not on social media,

play10:30

you've already lost.

play10:31

This is kind of a given.

play10:32

I don't care

play10:33

if it's like paid ads

play10:34

or building a personal brand in general.

play10:36

I recommend building a personal brand.

play10:37

But if you're not on social media at all,

play10:39

I don't know what you're doing.

play10:40

And then

play10:41

go and talk to any creator

play10:42

or one person, business

play10:43

owner that you know,

play10:44

and ask them

play10:45

what the most important

play10:47

part of their success is.

play10:48

And they're going to tell

play10:49

you it's not working. If they don't,

play10:51

I don't know what to tell you.

play10:52

So when you don't have an audience,

play10:54

which everyone does

play10:55

not have an audience at the start DM's

play10:57

or how you get in front of people

play10:59

and you start making connections,

play11:00

freelancers understand this

play11:02

well for landing clients,

play11:03

but the average person

play11:04

that is just trying

play11:05

to grow on social media,

play11:06

they don't see the importance of it.

play11:07

And so that's what this video is for,

play11:09

because I've seen I've seen people land

play11:11

job offers, right?

play11:13

This isn't only for people that are

play11:16

trying to start a business.

play11:17

This is for anyone

play11:18

that is looking to advance their career.

play11:20

I've seen people

play11:21

with tweets that go viral

play11:23

when they have very little followers,

play11:24

simply because they are friends

play11:26

with someone that has a lot of followers

play11:27

and they shared it.

play11:28

And so people usually fall into two camps

play11:30

here.

play11:31

First is that they don't understand

play11:32

the sheer power

play11:33

network effect of DMing people

play11:34

on a consistent basis.

play11:36

The second is that they don't understand

play11:37

that you can get large accounts

play11:38

to share your post

play11:39

if you are strategic enough.

play11:41

So this is clearly about

play11:43

how to send a good DM,

play11:44

but most people suck

play11:46

at sending DMS

play11:48

or they don't know how to do it.

play11:49

So I want to preface with this

play11:51

like No shame on you

play11:52

if you've done this before,

play11:53

but from here on out,

play11:55

never, ever, ever, ever,

play11:57

ever fucking ever send a DM that starts

play12:00

with starts and ends with Hi or Hey,

play12:04

how are you?

play12:05

Can you follow me back?

play12:06

A straight sales pitch

play12:07

with no prior connection.

play12:08

A long block of text

play12:09

that takes too much time to read,

play12:11

especially if the sentences

play12:12

aren't spaced out.

play12:13

You have to approach DMS tactically,

play12:15

especially if you're reaching out

play12:16

to big accounts that get ten

play12:18

plus DMS an hour.

play12:19

I would say that I get ten

play12:21

plus DMS on almost every single platform

play12:24

every single hour.

play12:25

And so you have to understand that

play12:27

like I'm one,

play12:28

I just do not have

play12:30

the physical capability

play12:31

of replying to all of those DMS,

play12:33

especially because it's not just one

play12:35

DM back, it's usually a question.

play12:37

And then I answer

play12:38

and then the DMS compound.

play12:39

So if I start answering people,

play12:41

the number goes from ten

play12:42

plus DMS to like 40

play12:44

plus DMS every single hour.

play12:46

So you have to keep in mind

play12:48

that people with a large

play12:49

following that you're

play12:49

trying to get in front of,

play12:51

they're just skimming through

play12:52

DMS to see if they're missing

play12:53

anything important to the point

play12:55

where it's like

play12:55

an email subject line

play12:56

or a hook for a piece of content

play13:00

or a headline for an article.

play13:02

You have to capture attention

play13:03

with what they can see,

play13:05

and you have to be strategic

play13:06

about what you're going to say.

play13:07

So let's dive into the seven steps

play13:10

to non needy networking.

play13:11

This started out

play13:12

as a guide in digital economics

play13:15

and then it got

play13:16

repurposed into to our writer

play13:18

to help people get eyes on their writing.

play13:20

And then I put it in modern mastery.

play13:21

It's just a very important process

play13:23

to understand.

play13:23

This is foundational

play13:25

for anyone trying to grow a business

play13:26

or just improve their career

play13:27

or just get online.

play13:28

And so the main purpose of this, really,

play13:30

when we peel it all

play13:31

back, is to get your name

play13:33

in front of people's eyes

play13:35

and in their mouths,

play13:36

because even freelancers struggle

play13:39

with thinking

play13:40

that they're just in this constant

play13:41

cycle of,

play13:42

I need to reach out to this guy.

play13:43

And then the conversation ends.

play13:45

If they never respond.

play13:46

No.

play13:47

If you reach out to 100 people

play13:49

and you were kind

play13:50

and you had value to offer

play13:51

and you walk through the process

play13:53

that we're going to go through,

play13:55

then they're even if they can't like,

play13:57

help you with anything,

play13:58

they're going to have you top of mind

play14:00

for the next person that comes to them

play14:02

and asks if they know anyone

play14:03

that can help with web

play14:05

design, email, marketing,

play14:07

fitness, whatever it may be.

play14:09

So the first step is to find

play14:10

somebody that you want to.

play14:12

DM You want to DM

play14:14

And this isn't exclusive

play14:15

to just making connections.

play14:16

This is crucial for paid work as well.

play14:19

So many freelancers choose niches

play14:21

that they don't give a shit about

play14:23

and then their entire

play14:25

they're just put themselves in this

play14:26

like fucking terrible place

play14:29

where they hate reaching out to people

play14:30

because they hate the people

play14:31

that they're reaching out to.

play14:32

They hate working with the people,

play14:34

so they hate the work

play14:35

that they're doing for the people.

play14:36

And then they just build themselves

play14:38

into another miserable 9 to 5.

play14:40

So this is a crucial step,

play14:42

is just to reach out to people

play14:43

that you actually want to connect with.

play14:45

So reach out to people

play14:46

that you are inspired by

play14:47

or you would want to work with,

play14:49

you would want to strategize with

play14:50

or you see potential for mutual benefit.

play14:52

And when you're just starting out,

play14:54

you kind of have to work your way up

play14:55

the ladder, right?

play14:56

Because there's

play14:56

so many different moving pieces

play14:57

with all of this, it's

play14:58

impossible to explain one video,

play15:01

but just one example.

play15:02

If I have zero followers

play15:03

and I'm reaching out

play15:04

to someone with 100,000

play15:06

and by chance they open my DM

play15:09

and then they look at my profile,

play15:11

there's like, Yes,

play15:12

this is a bit superficial,

play15:13

but there's there's

play15:14

not really anything you can offer me.

play15:16

I see zero followers

play15:17

and I think, okay,

play15:19

we're in this social media game.

play15:20

This guy hasn't put in any time at all.

play15:23

How is he going to help me?

play15:24

And of course, there's

play15:25

a lot more nuance to that.

play15:26

And so once

play15:27

you have an audience and leverage,

play15:28

you can really reach out to anyone

play15:30

you want.

play15:30

If you have 100000 to 1000000 followers,

play15:33

you have a lot more social proof

play15:36

because that shows

play15:37

that you've been in the game for a while,

play15:38

that you're offering some form of value

play15:40

that is just like a badge saying

play15:42

that like have stuck this out for a bit

play15:44

and I've actually proven myself.

play15:45

And so when I reach out to someone

play15:47

and I have like a million followers,

play15:48

I'll get a response from almost anyone.

play15:51

And so you're probably asking,

play15:52

where do I find people to?

play15:53

DM Well,

play15:54

I'm assuming that you follow people

play15:56

that you either want to connect

play15:57

with or can help you grow,

play15:58

or that you want to work with, right?

play16:00

You follow at least one of those people.

play16:01

So from that one person, go

play16:03

and look at their following list, right?

play16:05

This is probably 0

play16:06

to 1000 people that they follow.

play16:08

Look through that list,

play16:09

spend some time

play16:10

going through the accounts,

play16:11

find like minded accounts,

play16:12

or just find people

play16:13

that you'd want to connect with,

play16:14

follow them, start

play16:15

replying to them, engage with them,

play16:17

and then eventually walk

play16:18

through this process of DMing them.

play16:20

So the first thing that you send

play16:22

is an inspired compliment.

play16:24

This is step two,

play16:26

so you can find a piece

play16:26

of their content work

play16:28

or just something that they've done

play16:29

that truly inspires you

play16:30

or that you like,

play16:32

or it

play16:33

gave you an insight

play16:34

that you want to share with them

play16:35

and then you send that to them.

play16:37

So let's say

play16:37

it's like a tweet that I resonated with

play16:40

and I'm going to send that person

play16:41

the tweet

play16:41

and be like, Hey, man,

play16:42

explain what I liked about it,

play16:44

and then go from there.

play16:45

And so people love praise.

play16:47

And there's this thing

play16:48

called the law of reciprocity

play16:49

where if you give value to someone else

play16:52

and praise is a form of value,

play16:54

then they feel

play16:55

obligated to give it in return.

play16:58

So let's let's pretend

play16:59

that I wrote a tweet

play17:00

on managing emotions.

play17:01

This is what I would say.

play17:02

What's up, Dan?

play17:03

This tweet hit me hard.

play17:04

I've been going through it

play17:05

the past couple of days

play17:06

and this instantly gave me some relief.

play17:08

Thank you.

play17:08

And then I add the link to the post

play17:10

they liked.

play17:11

Simple as that.

play17:12

Step number

play17:12

three is to show genuine

play17:13

interest in them.

play17:14

So if they don't respond from this,

play17:16

you can just reach out again

play17:18

in the same manner,

play17:19

send them something that you liked,

play17:20

and keep doing that until they respond.

play17:22

And so showing interest,

play17:23

this communication

play17:24

one on one showing interest

play17:26

makes you interesting.

play17:27

So ask them about their goals,

play17:29

what they're building,

play17:30

what they do for work.

play17:31

This gives you an

play17:31

opportunity to give value

play17:33

even if you

play17:35

don't have the value to give right now.

play17:36

So let's assume that they just respond

play17:38

with the generic.

play17:39

Thank you so much.

play17:40

And that was to the last message.

play17:42

Now you can go to their profile,

play17:43

find what they're working

play17:44

on, or just a goal that they have

play17:45

and try to assume it.

play17:46

So if you find what they're working

play17:48

on, you can say something like,

play17:49

What are your next plans

play17:50

for modern Mastery?

play17:51

It's been crazy seeing it grow.

play17:53

I'm curious

play17:53

what you've got in store

play17:55

if you can't find

play17:56

what they're working on,

play17:58

do you have anything

play17:59

that you're building right now

play18:00

With that kind of content?

play18:01

You must have something

play18:02

bigger in the works.

play18:03

So step number four

play18:04

is to lead with value.

play18:06

This is the part

play18:07

that trip's most people up

play18:08

because most people

play18:09

don't think they have value to give.

play18:11

So your first options are to

play18:13

see where you can help

play18:14

send actionable tips

play18:15

if you personally have them,

play18:17

or you can send

play18:17

resources, videos, articles

play18:20

or anything that may help with them

play18:21

building what they're building

play18:23

in accordance with their goal.

play18:24

And so if you have to ask more questions

play18:26

in order to get more specific

play18:28

on what they're building

play18:28

so that you can actually

play18:29

help them with that, then do so.

play18:31

Ask more questions in between these.

play18:33

So if you have no value to give,

play18:34

you can send a resource

play18:35

that can help them with their goals.

play18:37

Connect them with someone else

play18:39

in your network.

play18:39

Just continue having a good conversation

play18:41

and showing interest.

play18:42

Show that you're interested

play18:44

in helping them.

play18:45

So step number five is to get on a call

play18:47

to make a deeper connection.

play18:48

So this part is optional,

play18:50

but highly recommended.

play18:51

You don't have to get on a call

play18:52

with someone,

play18:53

but I would practice it right,

play18:54

Especially if you're an introvert.

play18:55

It helps a lot to be able

play18:57

to get on a Zoom call

play18:58

and just talk with someone,

play19:00

because making that face to face

play19:01

connection is priceless, right?

play19:03

Especially on the internet

play19:04

where nobody really knows

play19:05

your mannerisms.

play19:06

They don't know how you talk outside

play19:08

of like a scripted reel or post,

play19:10

and it just helps to mesh

play19:11

on that personal level.

play19:13

And so when I was starting out,

play19:14

I was getting on Zoom

play19:15

calls left and right.

play19:16

Even if I didn't feel like it.

play19:17

I remember

play19:18

being so anxious

play19:18

one time when I was DMing,

play19:20

someone with like 50,000 followers,

play19:22

I was just like, Oh my God, this guy.

play19:23

Like, it's crazy.

play19:25

I can't believe I'm

play19:25

even getting on a call with him.

play19:26

And then you realize

play19:27

that every single person

play19:29

behind a high following count

play19:30

is human to they're just like you.

play19:33

And so people think

play19:34

that getting on a Zoom

play19:34

call is weird because, one,

play19:35

they haven't done it.

play19:37

And it's

play19:37

a lot more normal than you think.

play19:39

If you just ask someone, Hey,

play19:40

you want to get on call and like,

play19:41

I can help out with what you're building,

play19:43

or we can just talk shop

play19:44

and have a good time.

play19:45

And so it also helps

play19:46

to just take the conversation

play19:47

to somewhere

play19:48

like Telegram or WhatsApp

play19:50

where you can send them

play19:52

like a voice message, right?

play19:53

You can make it more personal.

play19:55

And now I mentioned WhatsApp.

play19:56

There's people in the replies

play19:57

of these YouTube videos,

play19:58

I'm going to get you

play19:59

one day, motherfucker.

play20:00

But there's like these scammers

play20:02

that have their name as like WhatsApp

play20:04

and then a number

play20:05

and they have my profile picture.

play20:06

That's so weird.

play20:07

Like, I'm sorry,

play20:09

I'm sorry if you guys like,

play20:10

click on that. You're an idiot.

play20:11

Don't click on those things.

play20:13

So step number

play20:13

six is to follow up with value, right?

play20:16

You've waited some time.

play20:17

You've gotten on a call with them.

play20:18

Maybe there's some space

play20:19

between the messages.

play20:21

The conversation fizzled out,

play20:23

but it helps to strengthen that

play20:25

or just like keep that connection going.

play20:28

Oh my God, my text guys calling me.

play20:31

Hey, how are you, man?

play20:32

Yeah, sounds good, man.

play20:33

I really appreciate it.

play20:34

So when you're following up with value,

play20:36

you want to remember their goals, right?

play20:38

You want to have their goals top of mind.

play20:40

So when you come across something

play20:41

or you find something interesting,

play20:43

just as you're consuming content

play20:44

or you're reading books

play20:45

or you're watching YouTube videos

play20:46

or you're building stuff out,

play20:48

then you can think to send it to them

play20:51

in order to just continue

play20:52

providing value to them.

play20:53

I've done this before

play20:54

with like content systems

play20:56

that I built out

play20:57

or like notion templates

play20:59

that are built out.

play21:00

And if I feel like it'll benefit

play21:02

one of my friends and my network,

play21:04

then I'm going to send it to them

play21:04

and just be like,

play21:05

Hey, man, I built this out.

play21:06

Maybe it'll help with X, Y, Z.

play21:08

And so if you want like

play21:08

a hard script to practice,

play21:10

I don't recommend like copy pasting

play21:11

any of these, just use your own voice.

play21:13

But if I were to give a script,

play21:15

it would just be.

play21:15

I remember you telling me

play21:16

about your plans

play21:17

for their project or goal.

play21:19

I found this today

play21:20

and thought you'd find it helpful

play21:21

so it could be a YouTube video.

play21:22

Or it could be really anything

play21:23

that you just feel like

play21:24

they would benefit from.

play21:25

So the last step, step number

play21:27

seven, is to follow up with an ask

play21:29

notice how we provided value.

play21:30

We've followed up with value.

play21:32

All of this is variable, right?

play21:34

You don't have to do it

play21:35

exactly in this order.

play21:36

These are kind of just the principles.

play21:38

And if you study influence or persuasion,

play21:40

you'll understand this a lot more.

play21:42

So I'd recommend like the book Influence

play21:44

by Robert Cialdini.

play21:45

But by this point

play21:46

you've built

play21:47

a pretty damn solid connection

play21:48

without asking for anything yet.

play21:50

And understand

play21:51

this is a long game as well, right?

play21:52

If you're here to just like

play21:53

get a quick payment from them

play21:55

or get like a quick retweet

play21:57

from someone

play21:57

or a quick share,

play21:58

like you may succeed,

play22:00

but it's not sustainable.

play22:01

You're not building an actual

play22:03

like good network that you can rely on.

play22:05

And so at this point,

play22:06

you can ask them to join

play22:07

a mastermind group,

play22:08

send them one of your posts

play22:09

that you've put a lot of time into

play22:11

because they may share

play22:13

or retweet that, right?

play22:14

You don't even have to ask them

play22:15

to retweet it. They could just share it.

play22:17

And the third is ask

play22:18

any specific questions

play22:20

you have for them

play22:20

without paying for consulting. Right.

play22:22

So this is like

play22:23

what a lot of people miss is

play22:25

they'll just shoot a message immediately

play22:27

to someone

play22:28

and expect like a thought out answer

play22:30

when there's no relationship there.

play22:31

And so if you have a burning question

play22:33

that you want answered,

play22:34

then you should practice

play22:36

building a relationship,

play22:37

because a lot of the time, I mean,

play22:40

some people do this.

play22:41

I haven't really done it in the past,

play22:43

but I know there's some like big,

play22:45

big people

play22:46

where someone will send them a question

play22:49

because they don't take into account

play22:50

how much time, like they're busy people.

play22:53

And so the person will send them

play22:55

like a link and be like,

play22:56

Hey, you can sign up

play22:56

for a consulting call here.

play22:58

It's like a thousand bucks, right?

play22:59

And so no one's going to pay that.

play23:01

But if you actually network

play23:02

with this person,

play23:02

you show their that you're a cool person

play23:05

and a real person,

play23:06

then you can usually ask questions

play23:08

and get answers because they like you.

play23:10

And so if your plan is to leverage

play23:11

these people for audience growth,

play23:14

then you need to write a tweet

play23:15

that they would think

play23:16

about retweeting, right?

play23:17

So you could write a tweet

play23:18

that mentions

play23:19

the topic that you learned from them.

play23:21

You can write a post on Instagram

play23:23

and tag them in it

play23:24

because you inspired a part of that post.

play23:26

And then when you send that to them,

play23:28

you just be like,

play23:29

Yo, just wrote this up

play23:30

and thought you'd enjoy it.

play23:31

It was inspired

play23:32

by our previous conversation

play23:33

and if they're tagged in it,

play23:34

then there's mutual benefit

play23:35

because if they share it in

play23:36

that post gets traction,

play23:38

it just looks better for them anyways.

play23:40

And so for DMS,

play23:41

you should be reaching out

play23:42

to people every single day, right?

play23:44

I'm assuming

play23:44

if you want to become a creator

play23:45

or your solopreneur one person business,

play23:48

you are in the space

play23:51

to not only learn

play23:52

and produce and meet people,

play23:55

but that's exactly it is.

play23:56

You're there to meet people

play23:57

if you like someone's posts

play23:58

deem them and tell them you like it.

play24:00

If you like

play24:00

someone's reply

play24:02

like it, engage with it and just be like,

play24:03

Hey man, I love that reply on the post.

play24:05

Like it's so easy to just send a DM

play24:08

to thank people

play24:09

for what they're doing online.

play24:10

And so there's a bonus tip number eight,

play24:12

because you might be thinking, Dan,

play24:14

won't this take a lot of time?

play24:15

It's like, yes, obviously

play24:17

zoom out and see the big picture.

play24:18

If it's going to take you four years

play24:21

to get a formal education and a degree

play24:23

and then another ten years

play24:25

to actually work your way up

play24:27

the ladder to a reasonable salary

play24:29

that you can live with,

play24:30

then it's going to take a few

play24:31

months, years.

play24:32

It's going to take some time

play24:33

to build your own thing.

play24:35

And all of this is ironic

play24:36

because the uncertain

play24:38

or the uncomfortable path or doing

play24:40

your own thing

play24:41

is the only quick fix out there.

play24:43

And when I say quick,

play24:44

I just mean

play24:44

like an expanded time horizon.

play24:46

It could take you two years

play24:47

to start making ten, 20, $50,000 a month

play24:51

by building your own thing.

play24:53

But then people love

play24:54

the certainty of like,

play24:55

Oh, I go to college for four years,

play24:56

I get to take a break,

play24:58

I get to go and work for this

play24:59

cool, big status based company

play25:02

and then work my way up

play25:03

the ladder from $50,000 a year

play25:05

to $100,000 a year

play25:07

and then get capped there

play25:09

and then eventually start my own thing

play25:11

and maybe spend a few years doing that

play25:13

when you could have

play25:13

just done it from the start.

play25:14

That's why

play25:15

the digital world has no barriers.

play25:16

This is such an important thing.

play25:18

We do not live in the world that we lived

play25:20

in ten years ago.

play25:21

You live right now

play25:22

and there's ample opportunity

play25:23

to build whatever the fuck you want.

play25:24

And so another thing

play25:25

is bringing your ideal future.

play25:27

The actions

play25:28

you're going to be taking

play25:29

then anyways into the now

play25:31

is something that you should be doing.

play25:32

If you want to be a writer

play25:33

and you're not writing for 1020 minutes,

play25:37

even an hour a day

play25:39

and then just scaling it up

play25:40

as you are able to make

play25:42

that more sustainable in your life,

play25:44

that's what you do

play25:45

if you're going to have to DM people

play25:46

anyways, when it comes

play25:48

time to start building your own thing,

play25:50

you should be doing it right now.

play25:51

So start with DMing two people a day.

play25:54

You like their content,

play25:55

dim them,

play25:56

then bump it up to five,

play25:57

bump it up to ten.

play25:58

I promise that alone will just change

play26:00

fucking everything.

play26:01

Because the thing with this is is like,

play26:03

Oh, you

play26:05

like why

play26:06

would I do these things

play26:07

if I'm not being paid for it?

play26:09

Do you, do you see the dissonance there?

play26:11

There's a huge dissonance where it's like

play26:13

you're not going to be able

play26:14

to get paid for it

play26:15

until you have enough practice

play26:17

from doing it without getting paid

play26:18

in order to get paid.

play26:19

And preferably it's

play26:20

something you like doing.

play26:21

Like if you're going to be writing

play26:23

every day in the future

play26:24

and getting paid for it,

play26:25

but you're not writing every day

play26:27

right now and working your way up

play26:30

in terms of income,

play26:31

then I don't know what you're doing.

play26:33

Like I'm feeling feisty today, so just

play26:36

get your shit together. That's it.

play26:38

So if you like the video, like the video,

play26:40

if you want to comment

play26:41

on the video comment,

play26:41

if you want to subscribe, subscribe.

play26:43

I'd love if you did that.

play26:44

Check out links in the description

play26:46

for to our writer.

play26:47

Learn new skill.

play26:48

Learn how to leverage it.

play26:49

Digital Economics

play26:50

Masterclass on Brand Content

play26:51

Marketing Product Model Mastery.

play26:53

For a community of like minded people,

play26:55

you can join for five bucks

play26:56

Link in the description

play26:57

free challenge, creative challenge,

play26:59

free power or other cool stuff.

play27:01

Just explore down there.

play27:02

And with that,

play27:03

I hope you have an

play27:05

incredible rest of your day.

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