Is it Haram for men and women to work together? | Sheikh Assim Al Hakeem -JAL

Just a layman *Sh. Assim Al Hakeem*
28 Mar 202107:23

Summary

TLDRThe speaker addresses the issue of gender interaction in the workplace, emphasizing the Islamic perspective on segregation between men and women. He argues that working closely together can lead to inappropriate interactions over time, even in religious settings. Using examples from Islamic teachings and real-life situations, the speaker stresses the importance of maintaining boundaries and avoiding casual conversations or socializing with the opposite gender. He advises men to remain professional, lower their gaze, and refrain from engaging in small talk or unnecessary interactions to avoid temptation and maintain modesty.

Takeaways

  • 😔 It is considered haram in Islam for men and women to work together in mixed environments, based on the Prophet's teachings that promote segregation.
  • 🕌 The Prophet emphasized the separation of men and women during prayer, encouraging distance between them as a form of modesty.
  • 👀 When men and women work closely, even with the best intentions, it's human nature to become more conscious of appearance and behavior, potentially leading to inappropriate interactions.
  • 🚶‍♂️ The speaker argues that spending long hours together in a mixed-gender environment can lead to relationships beyond a professional scope, even if it starts innocently.
  • ⚠️ Shaytan (Satan) is seen as influencing small interactions like sharing food or making small talk, which may lead to stronger personal relationships over time.
  • 😅 The speaker shares an experience of seeing men and women working together in a Dawah (Islamic outreach) organization, leading to marriages, but questions how many inappropriate things happened before marriage.
  • 🔥 The comparison is made between men and women working together and placing fuel next to fire, suggesting that it’s only a matter of time before inappropriate behavior occurs.
  • 🌍 If one must work in a mixed-gender environment due to cultural or professional necessity, strict boundaries should be maintained, including avoiding casual chit-chat or eye contact.
  • 🙅‍♂️ The speaker emphasizes lowering one's gaze and avoiding any socializing, even greeting with a 'good morning,' as a form of boundary-setting.
  • 🛑 The speaker believes that trying to be polite or friendly in such environments is risky and may lead to unintended attraction or temptation.

Q & A

  • What is the speaker's view on men and women working together in the same office?

    -The speaker believes it is haram (forbidden) for men and women to work together in close proximity because it can lead to inappropriate relationships and temptations.

  • Why does the speaker reference the Prophet's teachings regarding the arrangement of men and women during prayer?

    -The speaker refers to the Prophet's teachings on prayer to emphasize the importance of segregation between men and women. The Prophet said the best rows for men are at the front, and the best for women are at the back, indicating the need for separation even in religious settings.

  • What reasoning does the speaker give for men potentially behaving differently around women at work?

    -The speaker argues that men may alter their behavior around women by trying to look and act their best, such as trimming their beards, wearing perfume, or being overly polite, which could lead to inappropriate interactions over time.

  • Why does the speaker criticize even casual interactions between men and women in the workplace?

    -The speaker believes that even seemingly innocent interactions, like buying lunch together or being cordial, can lead to inappropriate relationships over time due to human nature and the influence of Shaytan (Satan).

  • How does the speaker view the example of marriages that resulted from men and women working together?

    -The speaker acknowledges that some marriages have occurred from men and women working together but cautions that not all interactions result in marriage and that many may lead to sinful behavior instead.

  • What is the speaker's stance on maintaining boundaries when working with women in a non-segregated environment?

    -The speaker advises maintaining strict boundaries by avoiding chit-chat, socializing, or direct eye contact with women, even at the risk of being seen as rude.

  • What example does the speaker use to illustrate how powerful individuals can also fall into temptation?

    -The speaker references a powerful man, potentially alluding to a former U.S. president, who was tempted by a woman despite his position, to highlight that even the most influential individuals are vulnerable to temptation.

  • What advice does the speaker give for men working in environments where segregation is not possible?

    -The speaker advises men in non-segregated environments to strictly limit their interactions with women, avoid friendly greetings or social conversation, and keep their gaze lowered.

  • How does the speaker suggest dealing with women who perceive a man’s strict boundaries as rudeness?

    -The speaker suggests that it is better for a man to be perceived as rude rather than risk engaging in inappropriate behavior, advising men to focus solely on their work and avoid unnecessary interaction with female colleagues.

  • What is the overall message the speaker is conveying regarding interactions between men and women at work?

    -The overall message is that free mixing between men and women in the workplace is dangerous and can lead to inappropriate relationships, so strict boundaries must be maintained to prevent temptation and sinful behavior.

Outlines

00:00

🚫 The Challenge of Gender Mixing in the Workplace

The speaker addresses the issue of intermixing between men and women at the workplace, deeming it haram (forbidden) in Islam. He references a hadith of the Prophet Muhammad, which promotes segregation in prayer as an analogy for workplace interactions. The Prophet emphasized that men should be at the front and women at the back during prayer to minimize interaction. The speaker argues that when men and women work closely, even if professional boundaries are maintained initially, over time, informal relationships may develop. He illustrates this with a hypothetical scenario of small interactions leading to emotional connections. The speaker emphasizes that even innocent gestures, like buying lunch together, can be exploited by shaytan (Satan) to lead people astray, asserting that free mixing is dangerous, even in Islamic organizations.

05:01

👁️‍🗨️ Boundaries in Non-Segregated Workplaces

The speaker discusses what to do if a Muslim must work in a non-segregated environment, particularly in a non-Muslim country or in situations where segregation is impossible. He emphasizes the importance of setting clear boundaries, such as avoiding unnecessary social interactions, not looking directly at women, and refraining from small talk. He advises Muslims to act professionally, even if it means being perceived as rude. The speaker warns that casual interactions, such as greeting coworkers or engaging in friendly conversation, could open the door to inappropriate behavior. He concludes by emphasizing the need for vigilance and discipline in maintaining Islamic conduct at work.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Intermixing

Intermixing refers to the interaction or mixing of men and women in shared environments, particularly workplaces. In the context of the video, the speaker argues that intermixing between men and women is discouraged in Islam due to potential temptations and distractions that may arise, leading to inappropriate behavior. The speaker highlights the natural attraction between genders and stresses the importance of maintaining barriers to prevent such interactions.

💡Segregation

Segregation refers to the separation of men and women in social and work environments to avoid inappropriate interactions. The video emphasizes that segregation is promoted in Islam, even in religious practices like prayer (salat), where men and women are instructed to maintain physical distance. This concept is presented as a protective measure against moral corruption and unwanted relationships.

💡Boundaries

Boundaries in this context refer to the limits that should be maintained between men and women in a professional or social setting to avoid any form of inappropriate behavior or interaction. The speaker advises strict boundaries, such as refraining from casual conversations, avoiding eye contact, and limiting socializing, even when working together, to prevent the possibility of temptation and sin.

💡Shaytan

Shaytan, or Satan, in Islamic belief, represents a being that tempts humans toward sinful behavior. The speaker suggests that Shaytan plays a role in gradually leading people to engage in inappropriate actions by starting with seemingly innocent interactions, such as casual conversations or sharing meals. Shaytan’s influence is highlighted as a reason why men and women should avoid unnecessary contact.

💡Islamic guidelines

Islamic guidelines refer to the religious teachings and rules that Muslims are expected to follow in all aspects of life, including social interactions. In the video, the speaker cites various teachings of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) to argue that intermixing between men and women in workplaces is prohibited in Islam. These guidelines are presented as a way to maintain moral integrity and avoid potential misconduct.

💡Free mixing

Free mixing refers to situations where men and women interact freely without any formal restrictions or segregation. The speaker views free mixing negatively, associating it with moral risks and inappropriate relationships that may develop over time. The video points out that even in seemingly religious environments, such as dawah (Islamic missionary work) organizations, free mixing can lead to unintended consequences like marriages or other forms of relationships.

💡Chastity

Chastity, in the context of the video, refers to the moral virtue of maintaining sexual purity and avoiding temptations or behaviors that could lead to immoral conduct. The speaker warns that working closely with members of the opposite gender could compromise chastity due to natural human tendencies and the potential for developing inappropriate attractions or relationships over time.

💡Temptation

Temptation is the inclination or desire to engage in actions that are considered sinful or immoral, particularly in relation to relationships between men and women. The speaker emphasizes that close interactions between men and women in the workplace can lead to temptation, even if it starts with harmless conversations or gestures. The video advocates for minimizing such opportunities to avoid falling into inappropriate behavior.

💡Cultural differences

Cultural differences refer to the varying social norms and practices in different societies regarding gender interactions. The speaker acknowledges that in some cultures, such as in Malaysia, men and women may work together more freely, but he critiques this practice, suggesting that Islamic values should take precedence over cultural norms to maintain moral integrity.

💡Dawah organizations

Dawah organizations are groups or centers focused on spreading the message of Islam and inviting others to the faith. In the video, the speaker criticizes some dawah organizations for allowing men and women to work together without sufficient segregation, implying that even in religious settings, the lack of boundaries can lead to inappropriate relationships and moral lapses.

Highlights

The speaker begins by addressing the issue of men and women intermixing in the workplace and confirms that working together is considered haram.

The Prophet's teachings on the separation of men and women during prayer are cited as evidence promoting segregation between men and women in various settings.

The speaker discusses how human nature makes it difficult for men and women to work together without forming personal relationships over time.

The speaker provides an example of how men may adjust their behavior when working with women, such as trimming their beards or wearing perfume.

The speaker suggests that after spending extended periods of time together in a workplace, relationships may develop between men and women, regardless of initial intentions.

An anecdote is shared about the speaker observing free mixing in an Islamic dawah organization, where men and women were working together without partitions.

The speaker emphasizes that free mixing between men and women in the workplace is like placing fuel near a fire, suggesting it will eventually lead to inappropriate behavior.

A comparison is made to powerful figures, stating that even strong men with high positions and beautiful wives can be tempted when working closely with women.

The speaker advises that if someone must work in a mixed environment, they should enforce strict boundaries, such as avoiding small talk, chit-chatting, or socializing.

The speaker emphasizes the importance of not looking directly at women while working and instead focusing solely on job tasks.

The idea that avoiding socializing with female colleagues may be seen as rude is dismissed, with the speaker suggesting it is better to appear rude than to compromise one’s morals.

The speaker warns that flirting and drawing attention to oneself is a natural temptation in a mixed-gender environment, and this must be avoided.

Practical advice is given for men working with women, such as not greeting them with 'Good morning' and avoiding any unnecessary interaction.

The speaker highlights how shaytan (Satan) exploits human weaknesses in mixed environments, encouraging inappropriate behavior over time.

The speaker shares a story of how a dawah organization that initially invited him never invited him again after he criticized their practice of free mixing between men and women.

Transcripts

play00:06

now um

play00:06

we mentioned you mentioned this briefly

play00:08

about the issue about intermixing

play00:10

between men and women at the workplace

play00:12

right so how do you advise

play00:14

us on placing these barriers of

play00:16

interaction

play00:17

or maybe let's start with this is it

play00:18

haram to have men and women

play00:20

working together

play00:24

yes that's a short answer

play00:28

how do you say it is haram well the

play00:30

prophet alaihis salat was salaam

play00:33

said to us about actually in islam

play00:37

which is salah he said

play00:40

the best role of men is the first

play00:44

and the worst role of men is the last

play00:49

and the best role of women is the last

play00:53

and the worst role of women is the first

play00:58

what does this tell you it tells you

play01:00

that the prophet is promoting

play01:02

the segregation of women in salat so the

play01:05

best

play01:06

role is the first for men and it's the

play01:09

last for women

play01:10

just to be as far as possible from one

play01:13

another now when a man

play01:17

sits with a woman do you think that

play01:20

he will be respectful and

play01:24

um chased and doing everything

play01:27

in his position uh in his power to stay

play01:30

away

play01:32

okay if i were to work with a woman i

play01:35

would

play01:35

most likely trim my beard i would most

play01:38

likely

play01:38

wear my best perfume before i go to work

play01:41

i would be as gentle as possible

play01:44

to the extent that my wife says hey

play01:46

where you going

play01:49

to work and if i

play01:52

sit with a woman for eight hours

play01:56

and she sits with me in the same office

play01:58

for eight

play01:59

hours she sits with me more than her

play02:03

father

play02:03

and brother and husband and i sit with

play02:06

her

play02:06

more than all of that and

play02:12

i see this everybody knows this maybe

play02:15

it's not the first week

play02:17

maybe it's not the first month but after

play02:19

six seven months of working together

play02:22

there has to be some form of um

play02:25

[Music]

play02:26

relationship so um fatima

play02:30

sister i don't call her fatima because

play02:32

there has to be boundaries

play02:35

i'm going to buy some lunch would you

play02:37

like some

play02:38

uh sandwiches oh thank you brother asim

play02:42

please can i have a chicken sandwich uh

play02:44

would you like it spicy

play02:46

no oh yes please i love it when it's hot

play02:49

what is this

play02:50

wait wake up oh we're just

play02:54

buying food i'm just being cordial this

play02:56

is what shaytan does

play02:58

bit by bit it happens even in dawa

play03:03

places i'm not referring to nakwa center

play03:05

i'm i'm talking about

play03:07

in general in malaysia i was invited few

play03:10

years ago

play03:11

by a dao organization to their

play03:14

conference

play03:15

and have the laughter that they've never

play03:18

invited me again

play03:19

so i went i went to the offices and i

play03:22

saw

play03:23

men and women working in this dawah

play03:26

islamic organization

play03:28

in offices together no partition

play03:32

subhanallah maybe it's the culture and

play03:35

after five minutes i started hearing

play03:37

laughing

play03:38

and joking between the bearded men

play03:42

and the hijab the women i said

play03:45

this is weird something is wrong

play03:48

so i was asking and they said oh yeah we

play03:50

had couple of marriages here

play03:52

after working together they got married

play03:55

yeah this is the halal but how many

play03:58

did not get married and and happen

play04:01

things happened

play04:02

so when i spoke to them

play04:08

after that they've never invited me

play04:10

again

play04:12

this shows you that free mixing it's

play04:15

bringing fuel

play04:16

next to the fire and say inshallah

play04:18

inshallah it would not ignite

play04:20

this is human nature even the most

play04:24

powerful man in on earth

play04:28

supposedly even the most powerful man

play04:31

who has a beautiful wife

play04:34

and a strong position the head of the

play04:38

strongest country in the world was

play04:41

tempted and seduced by a jew woman

play04:44

who was an intrin and you say that no no

play04:48

islam is too extreme

play04:49

islam is too rigid you always think bad

play04:53

yeah look what happened yeah so this is

play04:56

why we say

play04:57

no try to eliminate it now coming to the

play05:01

question

play05:02

if the country you're working in is a

play05:05

kafir country

play05:06

or it's a muslim country

play05:10

but there is no way to work in a

play05:13

segregated place

play05:15

you are as a man the breadwinner

play05:18

you can work with women with boundaries

play05:22

such as zero chit chatting

play05:26

zero socializing zero looking

play05:30

at them straight oh sure they will think

play05:33

i am rude

play05:35

yeah you're afraid that they think

play05:37

you're rude

play05:38

why don't you kiss them on the cheek in

play05:40

the morning and before you leave

play05:42

yes you need to be wake up what are you

play05:45

crazy

play05:46

let them think you're rude rather than

play05:48

try and think that you're doing well

play05:50

wow so so this is problematic

play05:55

as it's in our nature to flirt

play05:59

it's in a nature to show some of

play06:03

my charm and my power to

play06:06

crack a joke here and there and to draw

play06:09

attention

play06:11

this is what shaytan wants so you have

play06:13

to work with women

play06:15

you lower your gaze don't say good

play06:17

morning

play06:18

when you come to the office in the

play06:19

morning don't say hi

play06:21

good morning nope sit on your desk and

play06:24

do your job

play06:25

you need to sign something sign it and

play06:27

keep your eyes elsewhere

play06:29

don't socialize don't open a topic

play06:32

oh you were someone says why didn't you

play06:35

come yesterday

play06:37

i was sick don't say may allah

play06:40

inshallah none of your business

play06:44

keep it to yourself but this is how

play06:54

to remind all of you if you have any

play06:56

pearls of wisdom any brilliant nuggets

play06:58

of wisdom that you

play06:59

caught throughout these talks please do

play07:01

share them at the comment section and

play07:03

also in your personal social media posts

play07:05

uh put a hashtag tsp2021 and put a

play07:08

hashtag be steadfast i've already

play07:10

uploaded one at least so i'm gonna try

play07:12

and upload more mashallah a lot of

play07:13

brilliant points of wisdom so far even

play07:15

from these two talks masha'allah

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الوسوم ذات الصلة
Islamic GuidanceWorkplace EthicsGender SegregationProfessional BoundariesFree-MixingIslamic TeachingsShariah ComplianceWorkplace InteractionCultural PracticesAvoiding Temptation
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