What To Do When She Pulls Away

Summary

The video script addresses the common issue of a woman pulling away in a dating scenario, outlining three typical male reactions that can exacerbate the situation: becoming needy, shutting down, or ignoring red flags. It advises men to reassess their feelings, respond respectfully without chasing, and be willing to let go if necessary. The key takeaway is to maintain self-respect and dignity, as women value and respect men who respect themselves.

Takeaways

• 😣 When a woman pulls away in a relationship, it can be confusing and lead to men reacting in ways that may worsen the situation.
• 🤔 Men often react by becoming needy, shutting down, or ignoring red flags, which can be problematic for the relationship dynamic.
• 🔄 It's important to reassess and reaffirm one's feelings and intentions when a partner pulls away, rather than reacting impulsively.
• 🚫 Avoid acting out of neediness, anger, or resentment as these reactions can push the woman further away.
• 📞 Communication is key; label the behavior you've noticed and open the door for a conversation without pressuring or chasing.
• 💡 Be willing to let her go if the relationship isn't aligned with your standards or if she's not ready to communicate openly.
• 💑 Respect is crucial; women want to be with men they respect, and acting in a way that disrespects oneself can diminish trust.
• 👤 Maintain self-respect and dignity throughout the process, regardless of the outcome.
• 🔍 Sometimes a woman pulling away can provide valuable insights into her character and the health of the relationship.
• 🤝 Be open to understanding her perspective and the reasons behind her actions, but also maintain your boundaries.
• 🌟 The ultimate goal is to act in a way that reflects self-respect and dignity, which can positively influence the relationship.

Q & A

What is the common reaction of men when they feel a woman they are dating is pulling away?

Men often react in one of three ways: becoming needy, shutting down and becoming defensive, or ignoring the situation and not addressing the red flags.

Why do some men become needy when a woman pulls away?

They may feel anxious, stressed, and worried about losing the woman they are attracted to, leading to behaviors like text bombing or trying to quell their neediness through unhealthy habits.

What does it mean when a man shuts down after a woman pulls away?

Shutting down involves catastrophic thinking, where the man may assume the worst about the situation or the woman's intentions, and decides not to bother with the relationship anymore.

How can a man's reaction to a woman pulling away affect the relationship?

Reacting from a place of neediness, anger, or defensiveness can push the woman further away and make it harder to understand why she is pulling away.

What is the first step a man should take when a woman pulls away?

The first step is to reassess and reaffirm his feelings and intentions, taking a moment to breathe and not immediately react to the situation.

Why is it important not to react immediately when a woman pulls away?

Reacting immediately can come from a place of neediness or anger, which can be perceived as weakness and may hinder the opportunity for genuine communication and understanding.

What should a man do instead of chasing a woman who has pulled away?

Instead of chasing, a man should call her in by addressing the behavior directly and opening the door for conversation, while maintaining his own standards and self-respect.

What does it mean to 'call her in' when a woman is pulling away?

Calling her in involves initiating a conversation about the change in behavior without pursuing or pressuring her, showing respect and honesty in the approach.

Why is it important for a man to be willing to let a woman go if she pulls away?

Being willing to let go shows self-respect and acknowledges that the relationship may not be right or that the woman may not be ready for a relationship that requires open communication and mutual respect.

What is the significance of a man maintaining respect for himself in the situation?

Maintaining self-respect is crucial because women are more likely to be attracted to and respect men who respect themselves, regardless of the outcome of the relationship.

How can a man handle a situation where a woman is pulling away with dignity?

A man can handle the situation with dignity by being true to himself, maintaining self-respect, and addressing the woman's behavior honestly without resorting to neediness or resentment.

Outlines

00:00

🔄 Handling Withdrawal in Relationships

This paragraph discusses the common issue of a woman pulling away in a dating scenario and the typical reactions from men, which often exacerbate the situation. Men may become needy, defensive, or disconnected. The speaker advises reassessing feelings and the relationship dynamic, reaffirming one's own value and interests, and not reacting impulsively. It emphasizes the importance of understanding the reasons behind the withdrawal and whether it aligns with one's desired relationship.

05:02

🗣️ Communicating with Honesty and Respect

The second paragraph focuses on strategies for re-engaging with a woman who has pulled away. It suggests acting with honesty and truth, addressing the behavior directly without pursuing or shutting out the other party. The speaker encourages maintaining standards and being willing to let go if necessary, while also respecting oneself and the other person. It highlights the importance of respect in relationships and how acting out of anger or resentment can diminish trust and respect. The advice is to be true to oneself and handle the situation with self-respect and dignity.

Keywords

💡Pull away

The term 'pull away' refers to the act of distancing oneself emotionally or physically from someone or something. In the context of the video, it is used to describe a situation where a woman in a relationship starts to distance herself from her partner without clear reasons, causing confusion and concern for the man involved.

💡Masculine core

The 'masculine core' is a concept that represents the inherent strength, stability, and confidence associated with traditional male characteristics. The video mentions that in response to a woman pulling away, some men may disconnect from their masculine core, leading to behaviors like neediness or defensiveness, which can exacerbate the situation.

💡Neediness

Neediness in the video is portrayed as an anxious and desperate behavior that can arise when a man feels insecure about a woman's withdrawal. It is depicted as a counterproductive reaction that can manifest through excessive texting or other attention-seeking behaviors, potentially pushing the woman further away.

💡Defensive

Being 'defensive' in the script refers to a reaction where a person becomes protective of their feelings or position, often in response to a perceived attack or criticism. In the context of the video, men may become defensive as a way to cope with the uncertainty of why a woman is pulling away, which can hinder open communication.

💡Catastrophic thinking

Catastrophic thinking is a cognitive distortion where a person imagines the worst possible outcome in a situation. The video describes how some men, when faced with a woman pulling away, may jump to conclusions such as assuming she is seeing someone else or that they are not good enough, which can lead to a self-fulfilling prophecy of failure in the relationship.

💡Reassess

To 'reassess' in the video means to re-evaluate a situation or feelings. It is suggested as a first step for men to take when a woman pulls away, by taking a step back and evaluating their genuine interest in the woman and the dynamics of the relationship, rather than reacting impulsively.

💡React vs. Respond

The video distinguishes between 'reacting' and 'responding'. Reacting is portrayed as an immediate, often emotionally driven response that can be unhelpful, while responding implies a more thoughtful and measured reaction. Men are advised to respond rather than react to a woman's withdrawal to foster better communication and understanding.

💡Label the behavior

In the context of the video, 'labeling the behavior' involves directly addressing and identifying the specific actions that are causing concern, such as a woman's decreased communication. It is suggested as a way to open up a dialogue without being accusatory, allowing for a more productive conversation about the relationship's issues.

💡Respect

Respect in the video is highlighted as a crucial element in any relationship. It is emphasized that women desire to be with men who respect themselves and the relationship. Men are advised to act with self-respect and dignity, regardless of the situation, to maintain or gain respect from the woman.

💡Willingness to let go

The 'willingness to let go' is presented as an important mindset for men to have when a woman pulls away. It means being open to the possibility that the relationship may not continue and being prepared to accept that outcome with grace, rather than clinging to a situation that may not be healthy or productive.

💡Self-respect

Self-respect in the video is the idea of maintaining one's dignity and self-worth, especially in challenging situations. It is portrayed as essential for men to uphold their self-respect in the face of a woman pulling away, as it influences how they are perceived and how the relationship dynamic unfolds.

Highlights

When a woman pulls away in a relationship, men often disconnect from their masculine core, leading to negative behaviors.

Men may react with neediness, lashing out, defensiveness, or resentment when they sense a woman pulling away.

Some men shut down and engage in catastrophic thinking, assuming the worst about the relationship's future.

Others may ignore red flags and act nonchalant, failing to address the woman's behavior.

Not all pulling away is negative; it can provide valuable insights into the woman's feelings and the relationship's dynamics.

Upon a woman pulling away, reassess your feelings and the relationship's dynamics to determine if it's worth pursuing.

Avoid reacting impulsively; instead, respond from a place of truth and honesty.

Label the behavior directly by addressing the change in communication and seeking a conversation.

Maintain your standards and communicate what you will and won't tolerate in the relationship.

Be prepared to let the woman go if she does not meet your standards for communication and respect.

Respect is key; women want to be with men they respect, so maintain self-respect in your actions.

Acting with self-respect can provide clarity on whether the woman is ready for a respectful relationship.

Reassess, reaffirm your feelings, and label the behavior as a way to handle the situation with dignity.

Encouragement to share personal experiences and thoughts on the video's advice for further discussion.

A reminder to subscribe and like the video for more relationship insights.

Transcripts

what do you do

when a woman pulls away

you know let's just set the frame okay

say you're dating somebody

you really like them

uh maybe that maybe you've been dating

them for a while and all of a sudden you

can feel her pull away and you're not

really too sure why you don't know if

you've done something wrong if she's

questioning something maybe she got

scared maybe she feels insecure or maybe

she's intimidated by you maybe she's

playing game maybe she's testing you but

regardless she's pulling away and you

don't really know why

it's in these moments where

a man

will generally disconnect or can not all

men obviously but a lot of men will

disconnect from their masculine core

disconnect from

strength and stability

and can become

needy can

lash out can become defensive they can

really act from a place of resentment so

generally guys do three things that

cause a bit of a problem in the dynamic

and make things even worse so number one

a lot of guys will become needy right so

they'll feel the woman pull away they'll

really like her maybe they're really

attracted to her uh maybe they've

enjoyed spending time with her or it's

like oh that's the first woman that i

could see myself like really dating or

maybe they did start dating and it's

like you know you're six months into the

relationship and she starts to pull back

you're like what the hell is going on

and so you allow your anxiety and your

anxiousness and your stress and your

worry and concern to take over and you

find yourself doomed scrolling through

social media watching too much porn or

smoking too much weed trying to quell

that neediness or you start text bombing

the cramp out of her

the second thing that some guys will do

is they'll shut down you know they'll

think like screw her she's not worth it

uh i knew this wasn't going to work

anyway and they'll go to catastrophe

right they'll go to catastrophic

thinking like she must be sleeping with

somebody else or i knew i wasn't good

enough or whatever the story is anyway

and they'll kind of say she's not worth

it or i'm not going to bother and

sometimes when that woman comes back in

guys in this category will even try and

punish that woman and so they'll make

things worse they won't allow her back

in

they won't even seek to understand

what's gone on and then finally the

third category is the guy who's kind of

nonchalant and might blind himself from

the red flags right so he can't really

see

uh whether or not this is like healthy

behavior that she's just scared and

nervous or something's going on in her

personal life

or that there's a red flag here that

she's actually acting in a really

unhealthy maybe toxic way and and this

is going to lead to some trouble

so

not all pulling away is a bad sign you

know if a woman starts to pull away it

doesn't mean it's a bad thing it doesn't

necessarily mean that you've done

something wrong it doesn't necessarily

mean that it's the end of the

relationship

in fact sometimes a woman pulling away

can be some really valuable information

into who she is and into how she views

the relationship and so you can learn a

lot from a woman pulling away so when a

woman does pull away what do you do

right how do you actually handle this

the first thing that i like to tell guys

is start by reassessing and reaffirming

so when she pulls away slow down you

know take a few breaths don't text bomb

her in for 24 hours straight

take a moment to see am i really that

into her or has my feelings for her been

amplified because she's pulling away

and really start to reassess

is this the right dynamic for me am i

really interested in dating her and

and is this type of behavior something

that i

want to live with want to tolerate and

is it something that i want to invest

more into understanding and that's the

real key thing are you interested in

investing more time energy and effort

into understanding why she's pulling

away if the answer is yes great we can

move on if the answer is no it's

probably a pretty clear sign that you

don't want to move on with the dynamic

the second thing that i tell guys is

don't react respond so when you react as

a man you react from neediness you react

from anger you react because you're

embarrassed that she's pulling away or

you feel hurt and that's coming from a

place of i need you to tell me what's

going on or i don't care and if it's

from either of those polarities you're

not going to get the information that

you want she's going to see you as weak

she's going to see you as reactive and

whatever she's going through it's going

to be harder for you to get that

information out it's going to be harder

for you to understand why is this woman

actually pulling away from me

the third thing is don't chase her call

her back in

now

this

you know when you start to sit down and

and and uh really address how you want

to re-engage her

the best thing that you can do is act

from a place of truth and honesty so you

can label right rather than pursuing her

and trying to get her intention or you

know

blocking her or shutting her out and

like i don't give a crap if she ever

calls me again

address the behavior directly so get on

the phone with her facetime her or even

just text her or voice memo her and say

hey

i noticed that i haven't heard much from

you lately i noticed that your

communication is really dropped off the

map it seems like you've disappeared or

you're ignoring what's going on and open

the door for the conversation now she

might not want to step through that door

right she might still be avoidant she

might still be

you know scared to enter into it and so

you need to remain grounded to say hey

listen i'm not gonna i'm not gonna chase

you here i wanna understand what you're

going through but i need you to

communicate because i'm not willing to

be in a relationship with somebody who

pieces out like this so have some

standards and maintain those standards

and communicate those standards of what

you will and won't tolerate in the

dynamic

the next thing is be willing to let her

go be willing to let her go maybe she's

not the right one maybe it's not the

right time for her maybe she

has lost interest and doesn't know how

to communicate it maybe she's seeing

somebody else on the side uh i mean

there's there's literally a million

different things but we be willing to

let her go not from a place of i'm gonna

teach her or from a place of anger or

shame or resentment or embarrassment but

from a place of these are my standards

the type of woman that i want to date

is the type of woman who when she starts

to pull away and i ask her what's going

on once or twice that she communicates

she steps back in she does the hard

thing and says you know what i've really

been feeling insecure or this is moving

really quickly and

i am scared that you're gonna hurt me

you know that's a very common thing for

a lot of women so she might be pulling

away because she's feeling a lot you

know she's feeling a lot of attraction

she's feeling a lot of love and uh

admiration and and and her hopes are up

and that can be the thing

that causes her to pull away so this

brings me to the last thing

which is to remember that women want men

they respect women want men they respect

women want to date men they respect they

want to screw men their respect they

want to be friends with men they respect

they want to marry men that they respect

women want to be with men that they

respect so when you

lash out or allow yourself to go into

this very ungrounded needy anxious place

or you become bitter and resentful

she will lose respect for for you

regardless of what her intentions are

right whether she's pulling away because

she's scared she's going to get hurt or

she really really likes you and she's

like i don't know what to do with this

and i don't want to mess this up or

she's pulling away because she's testing

you or she's playing some sort of a game

regardless of what her motives are if

you act in a way that is disrespectful

for you for yourself as a man she'll

feel that and it'll cause trust to be

diminished in that experience so the

best thing you can do with before

yourself for the relationship is to act

in respect and when you do that you'll

very clearly get a sign of whether or

not she's ready for a man who respects

himself and she'll act accordingly to

that so be true to you be true to you no

matter what

and handle that situation with

self-respect and with dignity so

reassess and reaffirm label the behavior

be willing to let her go if that's

necessary not from a place of of uh you

know trying to hurt her get back at her

remember that women want men that they

respect and don't chase call her in call

her in so comment below let me know what

you really resonated with about this

video maybe where you've gone wrong in

the past

maybe what you're working on right now

in your relationship or in your dating

life and tell me if you think that

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