Breaking Down Communication Barriers | Angela Graves | TEDxEvansville
Summary
TLDRThis script explores the impact of hearing loss on perception and communication, using the absence of frogs on a farm as a metaphor. It discusses the importance of genuine dialogue, active listening, and clear expression in building understanding and community. The speaker emphasizes the need to overcome barriers such as self-importance and the desire to be right, advocating for compassionate and open-minded communication to foster a stronger society.
Takeaways
- 🦉 The speaker's father believes there are no frogs on his farm due to his hearing impairment, which has influenced his perception of their presence.
- 👂 Hearing loss has significantly impacted the father's ability to engage in conversations, a crucial aspect of community and communication.
- 🗣️ Communication is defined as a two-way sharing of ideas, requiring both speaking and listening effectively.
- 🔍 The speaker emphasizes the importance of asking questions to understand differing perceptions, such as the father's belief about the absence of frogs.
- 🌐 Perception is tied to awareness through the senses, and the father's lack of hearing has altered his awareness of the environment, including the presence of frogs.
- 🤝 Effective communication involves not only speaking clearly but also listening with the intent to understand, which is crucial for building relationships.
- 🚫 Barriers to communication include not just physical impairments like hearing loss, but also mental distractions like depression or low self-esteem.
- 💬 The speaker suggests using short, clear sentences and questions to ensure messages are understood and to promote genuine dialogue.
- 👥 Finding common ground, even in disagreement, can facilitate the sharing of ideas and foster better communication.
- 🌟 Genuine communication is essential for building community, which is the foundation of society, and the speaker calls for improved communication to strengthen society.
- 🌈 The speaker concludes by urging individuals to take responsibility for their communication style, advocating for compassion, honesty, and clear speech to build bridges within the community.
Q & A
What is the main theme of the video script?
-The main theme of the video script is the importance of genuine communication and the barriers that can impede it, such as hearing loss and preconceived notions.
How does the speaker's father's hearing impairment affect his perception of the presence of frogs on the farm?
-The speaker's father's hearing impairment affects his perception of the presence of frogs on the farm because he cannot hear the frog songs, leading him to believe that there are no frogs there.
What does the speaker suggest is the impact of hearing loss on the ability to engage in conversation?
-The speaker suggests that hearing loss significantly impacts the ability to engage in conversation, as it limits the individual's capacity to listen and understand others, which is a crucial part of communication.
According to the script, what is the definition of communication according to Webster?
-According to Webster, communication is defined as the sharing of ideas, emphasizing that it is a two-way street involving both speaking and listening.
What are some of the careers that communication majors are being prepared for, as mentioned in the script?
-Communication majors are being prepared for careers in marketing, writing, journalism, public relations, and promotions.
Why does the speaker believe that listening is not sufficiently emphasized in the curriculum for communication majors?
-The speaker believes that listening is not sufficiently emphasized because genuine communication requires not only speaking clearly but also listening with the intent to truly understand the conversation partner.
What is the speaker's suggestion for a better way to communicate with someone who believes differently, using the example of frogs on the farm?
-The speaker suggests asking questions to clarify understanding and to find out the reasons behind the person's belief, rather than trying to prove them wrong directly.
What does the speaker describe as an 'invisible handicap'?
-The speaker describes hearing loss as an 'invisible handicap' because it does not have visible signs like a wheelchair or a white cane but still significantly impacts an individual's ability to communicate.
What are some of the strategies the speaker recommends for effective communication?
-The speaker recommends using short, clear sentences and questions, being honest, and speaking distinctly to ensure the message is understood by everyone, including those with hearing impairments.
How does the speaker connect the concept of community building with the ability to share ideas?
-The speaker connects community building with the ability to share ideas by stating that relationships are built on the capacity to exchange thoughts and learn from one another, which in turn forms the foundation of society.
What does the speaker suggest as the first step towards better communication and community building?
-The speaker suggests that the first step towards better communication and community building is for each individual to decide how they will speak, listen, and respond, emphasizing the need for compassion, understanding, and compromise.
Outlines
👂 The Impact of Hearing Loss on Perception and Communication
The first paragraph discusses the profound effect of hearing loss on an individual's perception and the subsequent impact on their ability to communicate effectively. It uses the metaphor of the speaker's father not being able to hear frogs on his farm, which symbolizes his lack of awareness of things he cannot hear. The paragraph highlights the importance of listening as a crucial part of communication, emphasizing that without the ability to hear, one's perception of the world is limited. It also touches on the invisible nature of hearing loss as a disability and how it affects social interactions and the sharing of ideas.
🗣️ Enhancing Communication Through Active Listening and Empathy
The second paragraph delves into strategies for improving communication, particularly in the context of dealing with hearing impairments or other barriers like depression and low self-esteem. It suggests face-to-face interaction, the use of clear and concise language, and the importance of asking questions to ensure understanding. The paragraph also discusses the negative aspects of communication, such as the tendency to listen only to respond or to dominate the conversation, and emphasizes the need for honesty, clarity, and empathy in order to build a strong community based on shared ideas and mutual understanding.
🌉 Building Bridges Through Better Communication
The final paragraph focuses on the broader implications of communication for society. It draws a parallel between the individual's ability to communicate effectively and the health of the community and society at large. The speaker calls for better communication as a means to bridge divides and foster a sense of community. The paragraph concludes with a call to action, urging the audience to consider their communication style and its impact on others, and to take the first step towards more compassionate and effective communication.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Perception
💡Hearing Impairment
💡Communication
💡Belief
💡Conversation
💡Listening
💡Community
💡Barriers to Communication
💡Intent
💡Invisible Handicap
💡Empathy
Highlights
The impact of hearing impairment on the perception of reality, as exemplified by the absence of frogs on a farm.
Beliefs are shaped by perceptions, and the lack of auditory input can lead to a lack of search and acknowledgment of certain elements in one's environment.
The benefits of frogs in an ecosystem, such as mosquito control, and the unfairness of someone missing out on these benefits due to sensory limitations.
The broader implications of hearing loss on social interactions and the ability to engage in community-building conversations.
The definition of communication as a two-way sharing of ideas, emphasizing the importance of both speaking and listening.
The invisible nature of hearing loss as a handicap, contrasting with more visible disabilities like wheelchairs or white canes.
The importance of active listening in communication, particularly in fields like marketing, journalism, and public relations where it is often overlooked.
The ineffectiveness of proving someone wrong as a means of communication, versus asking questions to understand their perspective.
The role of perception in shaping beliefs, as demonstrated by the father's belief about the absence of frogs due to his hearing impairment.
A real-life example of miscommunication due to differing perceptions at a customer service desk, highlighting the importance of understanding each other's viewpoints.
The barriers to communication presented by listening to form a response rather than to understand, and the impact this has on the conversation.
Strategies for effective communication, including face-to-face interaction, using short clear sentences, asking questions, and speaking distinctly.
The impact of various invisible barriers to listening, such as hearing impairment, depression, or low self-esteem, on the effectiveness of communication.
The need for genuine communication to establish community and the role of community in building a strong society.
The metaphor of trolls in social media and the negative impact of non-genuine communication on societal progress.
The power of shared ideas in human progress, from da Vinci's dream of flight to the development of modern aviation.
The call to action for individuals to improve communication one person at a time, starting with themselves.
The importance of compassion, compromise, and effective presentation of ideas for successful communication and community building.
The potential of better communication to bridge divides and bring people closer together in a community.
Transcripts
[Music]
[Applause]
okay go ahead and kick off your shoes
you know there are no frogs on my dad's
farm that is to say he believes there
are no frogs and there's no doubt that
our beliefs are highly influenced by our
perceptions will believe it when we see
it or hear it my dad's been hearing
impaired for a very long time nearly 40
years and there are some sounds he
doesn't hear one of those songs is frog
song if he doesn't hear them he's not
going to look for them and if he doesn't
look for them he won't see them and if
he doesn't see them for him they're not
there oh he used to have frogs other
people have frogs frogs are really good
to have around they eat mosquitoes and
who doesn't love that it's really kind
of unfair that my dad doesn't get to
have frogs hearing loss has taken other
things from my dad the most obvious is
the ability to have a conversation
conversation on the phone conversation
in the car the church fellowship hall
around the dinner table you get the idea
conversation is where we learn to
communicate we learn to build community
Webster defines communication as a
sharing of ideas sharing is a two-way
street we speak we listen my dad no
longer has those conversational skills
that he once had oh no don't get me
wrong my dad can do anything he can fix
anything
well anything except hearing loss that
he can't even see hearing loss is in
fact an invisible handicap no wheelchair
no white cane just tiny little hearing
aids my dad can't hear but some people
won't hear communications majors today
are being prepared for careers that
utilize skills in marketing and writing
and journalism and public relations and
promotions listening is not even on the
curriculum but in order for
communication to occur we have to not
only speak in a manner to be heard and
understood but also listen with the
intent to truly resonate with our
conversation partner now
when we share ideas that does not mean
we have to agree with everything we hear
it does not mean our conversation
partner has to agree with everything
they hear it does not mean we need to
have totally harmonious convictions to
converse but we do have to share if I
want to communicate to my dad that there
are frogs on the farm and I say
something like there are frogs on the
farm watch I'll go catch one oh look see
here here's a frog there are frogs on
the farm what was my intent to prove him
wrong there was certainly no sharing
going on in that line of attack a better
way to communicate would be to ask
questions to clarify what I don't
understand when I absolutely know there
are frogs on the farm I should ask my
dad why do you think the frogs are gone
at that point he might share with me an
idea he has about how global warming has
affected even his farm in northeastern
Indiana or he might say he doesn't
really know but he sure hasn't heard
them for a while now we're getting
somewhere now I know which of his
perceptions has influenced his belief
about the frogs perception the state of
being or the act of becoming aware of
one's surroundings through the senses
through his sense of hearing my dad has
become aware of the lack of frogs on the
farm now we have perceptions in
conversation as well one day at the
Target store I had to intervene at the
customer service desk two people were
talking one was hearing impaired the
other was buried in her computer at the
end of the exchange one side and walked
away happily the other also side it was
just a sigh but it was not the same sigh
and it did not have the same meaning
because these two women had very
different perceptions of the
conversation now hearing loss is only
one barrier to communication another one
is listening in a perfect world we have
a speaker and a listener
the speaker is using short concise
sentences and a
stressing herself in an understandable
way the listener is listening he's
paying attention he's understanding in a
perfect world but what if we have a
listener who is only listening to form a
response he's not communicating he's not
taking in the meaning being conveyed by
the spoken word nor can he he is instead
imposing his own meaning on the words
and as such can't possibly understand
what's been said or what if we have a
speaker who is only speaking to hear her
own voice in that case I suggest using a
camera or a mirror to get the full
effect
that's not conversation either we we see
this when we ask a question and the
response doesn't match we walk away from
that saying what just happened George
Bernard Shaw said the single greatest
misconception about communication is
that it has taken place when speaking to
be understood if at all possible
interact face-to-face make eye contact
and take turns in the deaf community if
we're not looking at one another we're
not talking to one another second use
short clear sentences and questions
questions guarantee that our message has
gotten through have you ever had a
conversation where you make a plan and
then you get stood up later with oh you
were serious about that ask questions
guarantee that you've been understood
third honesty use it every time finally
speak distinctly enunciate
remember you might be speaking to
someone who has hearing impairment or
depression or low self-esteem these are
all invisible barriers to listening
hearing loss very often steals that
final constant of a word and that missed
word draws concentration from the next
four or five words and the whole
sentence is gone at that point the
hearing-impaired individual simply
smiles and nods the one with depression
might be distracted from the
conversation with thoughts of self-harm
muffled speech could sound very much to
him like his own thoughts sound
the one with low self-esteem might be so
excited that he's actually having a
conversation that he totally misses the
communication aspect a clear distinct
voice will be heard better by everybody
listening with intent remember we want
to hear what our conversation partner is
saying we value them they need to know
this listen to the words the intonation
the emotion that you can hear in their
voice and see on your face if you're
paying attention second find common
ground even if you don't agree with the
overall statement I disagree with the
idea that toddler should snack on dry
dog food however I agree with the idea
that dry dog food is not going to harm a
toddler once we've established something
we can agree upon we're more likely to
have a sharing of ideas I could then ask
what is it about the dog food or the
toddler that makes this a good
combination then maybe talk about
alternative snacks the nutritional
values of each simply refuting someone's
statement no child should ever be forced
to eat dog food might miss the point of
the story perhaps the child was giving
the dog treats and the dog wanted to
share but that's a story for another
time we have other barriers to
communication the need to be right the
need to blame someone the need to argue
and while these are truly barriers to
communication are they truly needs no
not really
what we truly need to keep in mind is
that our community is built on
relationships and relationships are
built on the ability to share ideas
learn are da Vinci dreamed of flight
Orville and Wilbur built a plane on that
same dream that shared idea Boeing
Corporation has expanded on the idea
even further together people can
accomplish well the sky truly is the
limit today however people are
intentionally keeping themselves
separate because they're not listening
oh there's a lot of talk going on social
media revolves around posts being thrown
up on any wall available and then the
poster walks away
that's a troll if we remember our
literature trolls live under bridges
bridges built by others bridges that
help people get to where they are going
trolls hinder progress don't feed the
trolls genuine communication establishes
community and community is the basic
building block of our society without
this genuine communication community
starts to fall apart and our society is
not far behind so how do we change the
way communication is done one person at
a time and that person is you you decide
how you are going to speak how you are
going to listen how you are going to
respond are you going to speak with
compassion or self-importance are you
going to respond with demands or
compromise and I don't mean compromise
your beliefs or your convictions these
make you the person you are but how
these ideas are presented will affect
how well they are received how
successfully they're shared we live in
the greatest country in the world we
really do unless not to say we don't
have some issues to work on but we have
the freedom to disagree we have the
freedom to share our ideas even if we're
separated by a great chasm the first
step to building a bridge over that
chasm is better communication do I
believe that better communication will
solve all our issues maybe not today but
I have hope in a future where better
communication does draw us into closer
community somebody just needs to take
that first step be as somebody when God
met Moses at the burning bush he asked
him to take off his shoes and then he
had Moses total attention well I'm not
God but thanks for your attention good
night
you
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
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