It's Not Manipulation, It's Strategic Communication | Keisha Brewer | TEDxGeorgetown
Summary
TLDRThe speaker emphasizes the importance of strategic communication, highlighting that both 'what you say' and 'how you say it' are crucial for achieving goals. Through personal and professional anecdotes, they demonstrate how understanding the audience, identifying goals, communicating value, and expressing needs can overcome resistance and create mutually beneficial outcomes. The talk aims to equip listeners with the tools to effectively navigate communication challenges in various aspects of life.
Takeaways
- 🗣️ The phrase 'it's not what you say, it's how you say it' is a common misconception; both what you say and how you say it are crucial for effective communication.
- 🎯 Strategic communication is about communicating with purpose, showcasing value to achieve a goal, and evoking specific responses from the target audience.
- 🔍 Understanding your audience is key to successful communication; it involves researching their interests, values, and the type of partnerships or relationships they seek.
- 📈 Strategic communication can help in both personal and professional scenarios, from securing a partnership with a major company to helping a friend rekindle a romantic relationship.
- 💡 The speaker emphasizes the importance of identifying the goal of communication, which guides the approach and ensures the message is delivered with a clear intent.
- 🤝 Strategic communication aims to create mutually beneficial situations where both parties feel they are getting what they want from the interaction.
- 📝 The process of strategic communication involves four steps: identifying the goal, understanding the audience, communicating the value, and expressing the need.
- 🚀 The speaker's success in securing a partnership with Google and helping a friend in her personal life exemplifies the effectiveness of the strategic communication method.
- 💼 In a professional context, strategic communication can lead to career advancements, such as a raise, as demonstrated by the speaker's experience.
- 🤔 Resistance in communication often arises from skipping the strategic steps, leading to misunderstandings or ineffective outcomes.
- 📢 The speaker's presentation itself is an example of strategic communication, where the audience's attention was gained by following the same method discussed in the talk.
Q & A
What is the main theme of the speaker's presentation?
-The main theme of the speaker's presentation is strategic communications, emphasizing that both what you say and how you say it are crucial for achieving desired outcomes in various life situations.
What is the speaker's definition of strategic communications?
-Strategic communications, as defined by the speaker, is communicating with purpose while showcasing value in order to achieve a goal, and it helps evoke specific responses from the target audience.
What are the four steps the speaker outlines for effective strategic communication?
-The four steps outlined by the speaker are: 1) Identify the goal, 2) Understand your audience, 3) Communicate the value, and 4) Express the need.
How did the speaker apply strategic communications in their professional life?
-In their professional life, the speaker applied strategic communications by researching Google's mission and interests, aligning it with their company's mission, and crafting an email to propose a partnership.
Can you provide an example of how the speaker used strategic communications in a personal scenario?
-In a personal scenario, the speaker helped a friend communicate with a romantic interest by understanding the man's values and interests, advising her to have an organic conversation to mutually express and align their values.
What was the outcome of the speaker's strategic communication with Google?
-The outcome was that Google responded positively, expressing interest in partnering for an event, which led the speaker to realize the effectiveness of their strategic communication approach.
How did the speaker's friend, Jessica, utilize strategic communications to reconnect with a romantic interest?
-Jessica used strategic communications by identifying common interests and values with the man, engaging in an organic conversation, and eventually leading to a mutual understanding and the opportunity to hang out.
What is the speaker's view on whether strategic communications is a form of manipulation?
-The speaker clarifies that strategic communications is not manipulation but rather a method that creates mutually beneficial situations where both parties feel they are getting what they want.
Why might people face resistance in communication according to the speaker?
-People may face resistance in communication because they are skipping one or more of the strategic communication steps, such as not identifying the goal or not expressing the need effectively.
How did the speaker engage the audience during the presentation?
-The speaker engaged the audience by asking questions, sharing relatable scenarios, and applying the strategic communication steps to the presentation itself, making the content interactive and relevant.
What was the speaker's goal for the audience in terms of understanding strategic communications?
-The speaker's goal for the audience was to help them understand what strategic communications really is, how it can be beneficial in their lives, and how it can help combat resistance in communication.
Outlines
🗣️ The Power of Strategic Communication
The speaker starts by challenging the common notion that 'it's not what you say, but how you say it,' asserting that both are equally important in strategic communication. They introduce the concept of strategic communication as a tool for achieving goals and overcoming communication barriers. The speaker shares personal and professional anecdotes to illustrate the impact of strategic communication. In a professional scenario, they describe their experience as a communications specialist tasked with securing a partnership with Google, highlighting the importance of aligning missions and values. In a personal scenario, they recount helping a friend communicate effectively to rekindle a romantic relationship. Both stories emphasize the four-step process of strategic communication: identifying the goal, understanding the audience, communicating value, and expressing the need.
🚀 Applying Strategic Communication for Success
This paragraph delves deeper into the speaker's professional success in securing a partnership with Google, which led to a realization of the need for a raise. The speaker reflects on the effectiveness of the same strategic communication method applied in different scenarios. They define strategic communication as purposeful communication that showcases value to achieve a goal, clarifying that it is not about manipulation but creating mutually beneficial situations. The speaker outlines the four steps used in their scenarios: identifying the goal, understanding the audience, communicating value, and expressing the need. They also demonstrate how these steps were applied in their presentation to the audience, emphasizing the importance of these steps in overcoming communication challenges and resistance.
🛑 Common Pitfalls in Communication
The speaker concludes by discussing common mistakes people make in communication, such as skipping steps in the strategic communication process. They explain that failing to identify the goal can lead to aimless conversations, while neglecting the other steps can cause misunderstandings and missed opportunities. The speaker reiterates the importance of both the content and the manner of communication, reinforcing the message that strategic communication is essential for achieving desired outcomes in various aspects of life.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Strategic Communications
💡Resistance
💡Value Alignment
💡Communication Specialist
💡Goal Identification
💡Audience Understanding
💡Mutual Benefit
💡Evoke Responses
💡Millennial Talk
💡Presentation
Highlights
The importance of strategic communications in achieving goals, emphasizing that both what you say and how you say it are crucial.
The speaker refutes the common belief that it's only the delivery that matters, asserting that the content of communication is equally important.
Introduction of the concept of strategic communications as a tool for overcoming obstacles and achieving desired outcomes in life.
The idea that resistance in life could be due to ineffective communication methods is presented.
The speaker's professional background in communications is shared, including her roles in news writing, advertising, and as a communications specialist.
An anecdote about the speaker's first day on the job, tasked with reaching out to Google for a partnership, demonstrating initiative and strategic thinking.
A personal story involving a friend seeking advice on how to communicate with a romantic interest, illustrating the application of strategic communications in personal life.
The speaker's success in helping her friend rekindle a relationship through strategic communication, showing the method's effectiveness.
A professional success story where strategic communication led to a partnership with Google, highlighting the method's practical application.
The realization that strategic communication can lead to personal and professional growth, such as a raise or a promotion.
A detailed explanation of what strategic communications entails, moving beyond textbook definitions to practical understanding.
The four-step method of strategic communication outlined: identifying the goal, understanding the audience, communicating value, and expressing the need.
The emphasis on strategic communication creating mutually beneficial situations rather than manipulation.
The speaker's application of the four-step method in her presentation to the audience, demonstrating the method's teachability.
The importance of following the four steps in strategic communication to avoid common pitfalls and resistance in communication.
A conclusion that reinforces the message that both the content and delivery of communication are essential for effective interaction.
Transcripts
good morning good morning
i'm excited to be your first speaker of
today by a show of hands
how many of you have heard of the phrase
it's not what you say it's how you say
it
do you remember the person who told that
to you
tell them they lied repeat after me what
you say is just as important as how you
say it your turn
what you say is just as important as how
you say it
and that is called strategic
communications
and strategic communications is probably
the very thing you've been needing this
entire time to help you get what you
need out of life
see most people stop going after the
bigger things that they want in life
simply because well they're just not
getting it
but what they don't realize is that
they're causing some sort of resistance
in the way that they're communicating
that's helping them not get what they
want out of life how many of you have
been in the situation where no matter
how much you talk and talk and tell
someone your viewpoint they're just not
getting it right
no matter how much you change your
approach and your delivery they just not
understanding your viewpoint whether
that's to a family member whether that's
to your spouse whether that's to your
boss or just not getting it i think
we've all experienced that type of
frustration
today
i'm going to give you the tools to
strategically communicate through all of
those issues and combat that resistance
and i'm going to do that first by taking
you through two parallel situations
very such very real situations to me one
personal and one professional starting
with professional
so i started my career in communications
a few years ago starting with news
writing and reporting
then going on to advertising specialists
then landing a job as a communications
specialist
in my communications specialist role i
was able to do things such as email
marketing
mission-driven partnerships writing
speeches for the ceo
things of that nature
on the first day of my communication
specialist role my boss said
i know this is a lot it's your first day
you're supposed to be doing paperwork
things of that nature but do you mind if
you reach out to google and see if they
can land a partnership with our next
event next month
and i'm like you're right that's a very
big ass for the first day i am supposed
to be doing paperwork where's hr
so
either way it's my job right it's the
first day you want to make a big
impression i shoot my shot that's
millennial talk for just get it done
and so
i look up google's mission
i figure out what they're interested in
the type of partnerships that they're
interested in
then i think about my company's mission
what type of partnerships are we
interested in what is our mission what
are we trying to convey
i wrap that up into an email
i send it to their communications
department i express the need
send it on its way
transition into my personal life
i get home and i'm scrolling on
instagram like us millennials do
and i get a dm from my friend jessica
and she's like oh my gosh keisha the guy
i like just damned me
i'm like okay
she's like and he liked my picture on
okay so what do you want to do now
she's like well you're a communication
specialist now teach me how to
communicate with him
as if that's what we did right
so i'm like okay
well i'll go with it what's the goal
what do you want him to do what do you
want to get out of the conversation she
says well i want him to be my boyfriend
again
it was a like on instagram right how far
are we going to take this
but
i let her keep going and i'm like okay
so what do you know about this man she's
like well i know that our values they
pretty much go together because on his
instagram i see that he posts music and
i like music and he likes food and i
like food and he likes his mom i like my
mom and i'm like okay
sure fine okay
and i'm like out of all the people
on instagram that he's engaging with why
you
and she goes on to tell me about how she
thinks their missions of being
successful in the entertainment industry
will align
all right
so here's what i tell her to do
slide into his dm
that's millennial talk for send a
private message
and just organically have a conversation
like you normally would
allow him to organically express his
values allow him to organically express
his interest and then you express yours
and see how they mutually align
at the end of it
see if you guys can go out hang out grab
a drink or something
cool
long story short
six months later
here they are
i played matchmaker kudos to me
moving on into my professional life i go
back to work the next day and my boss is
like keisha remember how i told you to
email google about that partnership
yeah less than 12 hours ago she's like
well they emailed us this morning and
they said they actually want to partner
on the event
and it was at that very moment that i
realized
i need a raise
but it was always it was also at that
moment that i realized i just
strategically communicated
into very different scenarios using the
same exact method
and that method is what i'm going to
share with you today
now let's take a step back
what does strategic communications
really mean
how many of you have taken a strategic
communications class or communications
course by a show of hands
great
so what you probably learned is
something along the lines of strategic
communications is communicating the best
message through the right channels
measured against well considered
organizational communication specific
goals great right
but through my two scenarios which you
can probably see is that strategic
communications is simply
communicating with purpose
while showcasing value in order to
achieve a goal
and at the heart of it all strategic
communications helps you evoke specific
responses out of your target audience
whether that be a spouse a love interest
your boss
and in those responses it helps you get
what you want out of the situation as
well
now you can also be thinking is she
teaching us how to manipulate people
maybe
but not really because strategic
communications creates mutually
beneficial situations strategic
communications allows both parties to
feel like they're getting what they want
out of the deal
okay
so
if you were paying attention
here's what i did in both scenarios to
help them get what they want out of the
situation number one
i identified the goal
in the professional situation the goal
was to land the partnership with google
in the personal situation the goal was
to land the boyfriend
step two
understand your audience
in the professional situation i
researched everything about google to
understand what type of partnerships
they'd like to align with
in the personal situation
i was able to allow jessica to go into
his instagram and say what does he like
to do understand what his values are
step three
communicate the value
communicating the value in the
partnership with google look like
helping them understand what they get
out of a partnership with us
in the personal situation she
communicated what value their interests
would have with one another
and step four
express the need
in both situations i was able to use the
value that they both share to express
the need that they both want
and so by doing this
and using this method i'm able to combat
the resistance commonly felt when people
are communicating through challenges
even like today
i was able to use strategic
communication standing right here on
this stage and not because i was able to
memorize my lines on hearing speech and
not because i was able to put together
this presentation but because i took you
through those same four steps standing
right here number one
i identified the goal which was to get
you guys to understand what
communication strategic communications
really was
two
i took the time to understand my
audience by asking you guys two
questions to help me know who was in the
room today
step three i communicated the value of
what strategic communications can do in
your life
in step four
i expressed the need for why you need
strategic communications
and see usually the reason why people
are faced with a lot of resistance in
the way that they're communicating is
because they're skipping these four
steps or at least one of them
for example if you don't identify the
goal you'll be speaking without purpose
you ever had those conversations where
you realize it started off one way and
it ended another and you're trying to
figure out how you even got there didn't
identify the goal
step two
i was able to step i'm sorry step three
i was able to communicate the value and
then express the need here on this stage
why do you need strategic communications
why this is going to help you in your
life and how you can combat that
resistance
so at the heart of it all realize
it's not what you say
what you say is just as important as how
you say it
thank you
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