What I Got Wrong About Mentorship | Simon Sinek
Summary
TLDRThe speaker reflects on the importance of mentorship, sharing his experience with his mentor Ron Bruder. He emphasizes that mentor relationships evolve naturally, akin to friendships, and are not forced. The speaker prioritized working with smart, inspiring people over job prestige or pay, highlighting the value of learning and growth in a professional environment.
Takeaways
- 🤝 Mentorship is a two-way street: The mentor also learns from the mentee, making the relationship mutually beneficial.
- 📞 Accessibility is key: A mentor is someone who makes time for you, even after just one meeting, showing their willingness to guide and support.
- 💬 The 'M' word signifies a deep connection: Using the term 'mentor' for the first time solidified the bond, indicating a relationship that goes beyond professional guidance.
- 🤔 Mentor relationships evolve naturally: They cannot be forced or assigned; they develop over time through mutual respect and shared experiences.
- 🌟 Seek mentors who are accomplished and wise: The mentor in the story was successful and years senior, offering valuable life and professional insights.
- 🧐 Look for a mentor who sees potential in you: The mentor made time because they saw something in the mentee, highlighting the importance of being recognized and nurtured.
- 💼 Prioritize people over positions: When job hunting, the focus should be on finding a mentor and a supportive team rather than just the job title or salary.
- 🌱 Growth is the goal: The desire to work with smart and amazing people who can teach and help you grow is a key factor in choosing a job or mentor.
- 🔍 Actively seek out mentors: The speaker's approach to job interviews emphasized the search for a mentor, showing the importance of being proactive in finding guidance.
- 🏆 Mentorship can lead to success: Working with mentors and learning from them has been a contributing factor to the speaker's career achievements.
- 💭 The mentor also benefits: Contrary to the initial belief that mentors only give, the speaker discovered that mentors gain fulfillment and learning from the relationship as well.
Q & A
What did the speaker learn about mentorship from Ron Bruder?
-The speaker learned that mentorship is about a mutual relationship similar to friendship, where both parties learn and grow from each other, rather than it being a one-sided favor.
How did the speaker's mentorship with Ron Bruder begin?
-The mentorship began when the speaker called Ron with a question after being introduced to him professionally. Ron took the call and they met for lunch, which led to a mentorship relationship.
What was the unexpected response from Ron Bruder when the speaker first used the term 'mentor'?
-Ron Bruder unexpectedly reciprocated the sentiment by saying he loved that the speaker was his mentor too, indicating a two-way relationship.
Why did the speaker emphasize that mentor relationships evolve rather than being assigned?
-The speaker emphasized this because a genuine mentor relationship is built on mutual respect, learning, and time investment, which cannot be forced or assigned.
What was the speaker's approach to seeking a job as an entry-level professional?
-The speaker prioritized finding a mentor and working with smart, amazing people who could teach and help them grow over factors like salary or the profile of the account.
What comparison did the speaker make when describing their job search criteria?
-The speaker compared their job search to looking for love, emphasizing the importance of finding the right mentors and colleagues over other job aspects.
How did the speaker's perspective on mentors change over time?
-Initially, the speaker thought mentors were just doing them favors, but later realized that mentors also gain something from the relationship, learning as much as they teach.
What was the speaker's attitude towards working with accounts that were not well-known?
-The speaker was indifferent to the fame of the accounts, focusing instead on the opportunity to work with and learn from talented individuals.
What did the speaker mean by saying they were a 'more senior idiot' now?
-This was a self-deprecating way of saying that while they had gained experience and knowledge, there was still much to learn, indicating a continued desire for mentorship.
How does the speaker define a successful mentor-mentee relationship?
-A successful mentor-mentee relationship, according to the speaker, is one where the mentor always makes time for the mentee and both parties learn from each other.
What advice would the speaker give to someone looking for a mentor?
-The speaker would advise to seek out mentors actively, focusing on the quality of the relationship and the potential for mutual growth, rather than on superficial job aspects.
Outlines
🤝 The Essence of Mentorship
The speaker reflects on the mentorship he received from Ron Bruder, highlighting the organic development of their relationship. Initially introduced professionally, the speaker reached out to Ron for advice, and Ron's willingness to help despite only meeting once demonstrated his mentorship spirit. A pivotal moment occurred when the speaker acknowledged Ron as his mentor, and Ron reciprocated the sentiment, emphasizing the mutual nature of mentorship. The speaker learned that mentorship is akin to friendship, evolving naturally rather than being forced or transactional. He also shares his career philosophy, prioritizing the opportunity to learn from mentors over other job aspects.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Mentorship
💡Professional
💡Accomplish
💡Wise
💡Mentor
💡Friendship
💡Reciprocal
💡Mentee
💡Seek Out
💡Transaction
💡Profile
Highlights
Mentorship is a relationship that evolves naturally, not something that can be forced or assigned.
Mentorship is like a friendship, where both parties learn and grow from each other.
A mentor makes time for you because they see potential in you and want to help you grow.
The speaker's mentor, Ron Bruder, was very accomplished, wise, and took the time to help despite only meeting once.
The speaker initially thought mentorship was one-sided, with the mentor only giving, but later realized it was a two-way street.
Mentorship is not transactional; it's about building a genuine connection and learning from each other.
The speaker's realization that mentorship is a mutual relationship came when Ron Bruder said he was also the speaker's mentor.
Mentorship often starts with a professional connection but can develop into a deeper, more personal relationship.
The importance of seeking out mentors and building relationships with those who can teach and inspire you.
The speaker's approach to job interviews was to prioritize finding a mentor over salary or job profile.
Working with smart, amazing people who can teach you and help you grow is more valuable than the job itself.
The speaker's career progression was influenced by the mentors and people they chose to work with.
The concept of being 'assigned' a mentor does not work as well as naturally forming a mentorship bond.
Mentorship is a continuous process of learning, not just for the mentee but also for the mentor.
The speaker's early career was focused on finding a mentor and learning from them, rather than just seeking a job.
The value of taking jobs with lesser-known accounts to work with people who could provide mentorship and growth opportunities.
Transcripts
one of my mentors ron bruder um
you know taught me what mentorship was
really all about
i met him professionally i was
introduced to him he's
very accomplished very successful much
you know many years my senior
very wise we got along and you know a
week or two later i
i had a question that i thought he might
be able to help me with and i called him
and he
took my call i only met him once and
they took my call again
and then we met for lunch he just kept
saying yes
and he became my mentor you know
and i remember us at his house one day
and i was getting
i was leaving and i put my arm around
him and i used the m word for the very
first time i said
i love that you're my mentor and he said
something to me that it i didn't expect
he said and i love that you're mine
and that's when i realized a mentor
relationship is is more like a
friendship you know
you can't just walk up to a random
person and say will you be my mentor of
course
just like you can't walk up to a random
person and say will you be my friend
that's not how it works
mentor relationships evolve
because a mentor always has time for you
they see something in you for some
reason that they make time for you
and they learn as much as they
as much as they teach yeah they come
into it because they
they learn i never knew that ron was
getting something from our time together
i thought he was just doing me favors
because he was an amazing guy
um and a mentor relationship is it's a
mentor mentor relationship
so this whole idea of like you're
assigned to be someone's mentor
like ah maybe that could work well that
seems again going back to sort of a
transactional like
transaction you know you have to have
mentors and you have to seek them out
yeah i remember when i was junior
looking for a job you know people say
what are you looking for
and my standard answer in every
interview as an entry-level
you know idiot was uh that's the theme
in my in my
career uh i'm just a more senior idiot
now yeah
um uh when they say what are you looking
for
my answer was always the same i said
what i'm looking for is probably
akin to looking for love but i'm looking
for a mentor
and every job that i was looking for i
was
i was more concerned about the people i
would work for
than i was how much they would pay me or
whether the account was high profile or
low profile
and so i took jobs with like accounts
that nobody ever heard of
uh because i didn't care i cared about
the people who's gonna work i wanted to
work with really smart amazing people
who would teach me and help me grow yeah
and that's one of the reasons
i got to work with some of these
wonderful people yeah
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