How to stop feeling anxious about anxiety | Tim Box | TEDxFolkestone

Summary

In this insightful talk, Tim Box candidly shares his journey with anxiety, moving from suffering to understanding it as a natural emotion rather than an illness. He emphasizes the importance of listening to one's inner 'crew', or subconscious, and treating anxiety with kindness and acceptance. By reframing anxiety as a helpful signal rather than an enemy, Box encourages embracing this emotion as part of the human experience, ultimately leading to a healthier relationship with our own minds.

Takeaways

• 😔 Tim Box admits to feeling anxious, particularly about his ability to communicate effectively and being understood by his audience.
• 🔄 Tim used to suffer from severe anxiety but has since learned to experience anxiety without suffering from it, by changing his perspective and approach.
• 🙅‍♂️ He emphasizes that trying to get rid of anxiety is a mistake and that it's not something that can or should be eliminated.
• 🌐 Tim's work involves helping others understand and overcome anxiety, often by addressing the common desire to eliminate it completely.
• 🏥 He critiques the medical approach to treating anxiety, pointing out the limitations of time, knowledge, and resources doctors have in dealing with anxiety.
• 💊 Tim is not a fan of medicating anxiety due to potential side effects and the risk of dependency, suggesting that a medical solution is not the answer to a non-medical problem.
• 💭 He argues that anxiety is an emotion, not an illness, and that it serves a purpose in alerting us to things that require our attention.
• 🚢 Tim uses the analogy of a ship with a captain and crew to explain how our minds work, with the crew representing our subconscious and emotions.
• 🗣️ Listening to and understanding the messages from our 'crew' is crucial for managing anxiety and turning it from an enemy into a friend.
• 🤗 Being kind to oneself and one's 'crew' is essential for building self-esteem and reducing anxiety, as self-criticism can demoralize and exacerbate anxiety.
• 🌟 Tim concludes by encouraging the acceptance of anxiety as a natural part of life and suggests that recognizing its value can lead to less suffering from it.

Q & A

What is Tim Box's initial feeling at the beginning of his talk?

Tim Box feels anxious, particularly about remembering what he came to say, whether the audience will agree with him, and the possibility of tripping up on the way out.

How does Tim Box describe his past experience with anxiety?

In the past, Tim Box experienced such intense anxiety that it made it difficult for him to even walk into a room with many people, let alone stand at the front and give a talk.

What is the main change Tim Box has experienced regarding his anxiety?

The main change Tim Box has experienced is that while he still experiences anxiety, he no longer suffers with it, indicating a shift in his relationship with the emotion.

What was Tim Box's initial approach to dealing with anxiety?

Initially, Tim Box tried to avoid anxiety-inducing situations, ran away when he felt anxiety starting, and used distraction techniques to take his mind off the uncomfortable feeling.

How does Tim Box view the common desire to get rid of anxiety completely?

Tim Box suggests that the desire to completely get rid of anxiety is misguided, as anxiety serves an important purpose and is a natural part of the human experience.

What are the two groups of people who don't feel anxiety according to Tim Box?

According to Tim Box, the two groups of people who don't feel anxiety are dead people and psychopaths, who lack concern for the consequences of their actions.

Why does Tim Box believe that anxiety is not an illness?

Tim Box believes that anxiety is not an illness because it is a natural emotion with a purpose, and every emotion is a vital part of our human experience.

What is the analogy Tim Box uses to explain our emotional responses?

Tim Box uses the analogy of a ship with a captain and crew to explain emotional responses. The captain represents the logical, rational part of our thinking, while the crew represents the subconscious, which is in charge of automatic responses, including emotions.

What is the main principle that Tim Box suggests the subconscious operates on?

The main principle that the subconscious operates on, according to Tim Box, is trying to find the best strategy for the most happiness, which includes safety as a component of happiness.

What are the three main things Tim Box did to change his relationship with anxiety?

The three main things Tim Box did were: 1) Refusing to believe he was ill and recognizing that anxiety is triggered by situations or thoughts; 2) Listening to his subconscious 'crew' and understanding what it was trying to achieve with the feelings of anxiety; 3) Being kind to himself and building up his self-esteem.

How does Tim Box feel about medication as a solution for anxiety?

Tim Box is not a fan of medicating anxiety due to the unpredictable and unpleasant side-effects and the potential for dependency, which can itself become another source of anxiety.

What is Tim Box's view on the role of doctors in treating anxiety?

Tim Box acknowledges the limitations of doctors in treating anxiety, including time constraints, lack of specialized knowledge, and limited resources, but also expresses sympathy for the challenges they face in addressing anxiety issues.

What does Tim Box suggest is the first step towards changing one's experience with anxiety?

The first step towards changing one's experience with anxiety, according to Tim Box, is to accept it as a natural part of the human experience and treat it not as an enemy but as a trusted friend.