If you want to ruin your life, do these 10 things

Dillon Latham
19 Sept 202410:14

Summary

TLDRThis video offers insights on how to avoid ruining your life by highlighting common destructive habits. The speaker, a 19-year-old, shares lessons on the dangers of watching adult films, procrastination, surrounding yourself with negative influences, gossiping, and engaging in promiscuity. They also discuss the importance of discipline in diet, not living to impress others, and avoiding a 'safe' life without taking risks. The video encourages viewers to break free from societal norms that drag them down and pursue personal growth and fulfillment through healthier choices.

Takeaways

  • 😀 Watching adult films provides instant dopamine but damages long-term happiness by offering unearned gratification.
  • ⏳ Procrastination delays progress toward goals and allows others to outpace you in competition for success.
  • 👥 Surrounding yourself with toxic friends who drag you down through negative habits like smoking or drinking can ruin your life.
  • 🗣️ Talking behind people's backs damages your reputation and reflects insecurity.
  • 💔 Promiscuity reduces long-term happiness in relationships and increases risks of diseases.
  • 🍔 Eating whatever makes you happy, without discipline, leads to long-term health problems, like obesity.
  • 📅 Lack of discipline, by doing whatever you want whenever you want, hinders personal growth and leads to regret.
  • 🙇 Living to impress others rather than yourself stifles personal fulfillment and makes you act against your instincts.
  • 🚫 Playing it safe and avoiding risks leads to a stagnant, unfulfilling life. Taking risks is necessary for personal growth.
  • 🎯 Doing things you're passionate about and not just what's 'safe' can lead to a more rewarding life experience.

Q & A

  • What is the main message of the video?

    -The main message of the video is to highlight the habits and actions that can ruin a person's life and how to avoid them. The speaker shares personal insights and offers advice on what not to do in order to live a more fulfilling and successful life.

  • Why does the speaker consider watching adult films harmful?

    -The speaker argues that watching adult films gives the brain an unearned dopamine rush, similar to a drug, which can condition a person to seek easy happiness without effort. This, in turn, can ruin a person's ability to find joy in healthier, more meaningful activities.

  • How does procrastination negatively affect life, according to the speaker?

    -The speaker explains that procrastination delays progress and allows others who are more diligent to get ahead. By consistently putting things off, it becomes harder to achieve personal goals, whether in academics, personal growth, or professional success.

  • Why does the speaker warn against associating with negative influences or bad friends?

    -The speaker warns that surrounding oneself with people who engage in harmful behaviors, such as smoking, drinking, or drug use, can drag a person down. These people may pressure others to engage in these behaviors to normalize their own bad choices.

  • What is the significance of not talking behind people's backs?

    -The speaker emphasizes that talking behind people's backs reflects insecurity and can lead to regret. It damages relationships and makes a person feel worse about themselves, as it often results in feelings of guilt and shame.

  • Why does the speaker view promiscuity as damaging?

    -The speaker cites studies that suggest being promiscuous lowers a person's chances of happiness in long-term relationships or marriage. Additionally, there is the risk of spreading diseases, making it a harmful behavior for both physical and emotional well-being.

  • What point does the speaker make about eating habits and health?

    -The speaker emphasizes the importance of discipline in eating habits, especially avoiding unhealthy foods. He shares a personal experience where he was made fun of for trying to eat healthily, which reflects how society often discourages self-discipline when it comes to food.

  • How does the speaker define discipline in the context of avoiding life-ruining behaviors?

    -Discipline is defined as the ability to do what is necessary, even when it's not immediately enjoyable. The speaker argues that without discipline, people are more likely to give in to impulses, which can lead to procrastination, poor health, and failure to achieve meaningful goals.

  • What does the speaker mean by 'impressing other people' as a way to ruin your life?

    -The speaker argues that constantly seeking to impress others, rather than focusing on personal happiness or fulfillment, can lead to a life of dissatisfaction. People should prioritize their own goals and values instead of living for the approval of others, especially those they may never see again.

  • Why does the speaker say playing it safe can ruin your life?

    -The speaker believes that playing it safe, or avoiding risks, can lead to a life of mediocrity and missed opportunities. He encourages taking calculated risks, such as pursuing passions or starting a business, because without taking risks, one may never know what they are capable of achieving.

Outlines

00:00

😔 Dealing with Modern Unhappiness

The speaker addresses the widespread unhappiness and depression in modern life. While the internet offers advice on success, there is little focus on what behaviors to avoid. The speaker, at 19 years old, shares insights on harmful habits in an attempt to highlight the most damaging actions people engage in, promising to guide the audience from least to most harmful. The first point emphasizes the dangers of consuming adult films, which provide a dopamine rush without effort, potentially leading to long-term dissatisfaction and emotional numbness.

05:03

⏳ The Dangers of Procrastination

Procrastination is presented as a major factor in ruining one’s life. By delaying responsibilities, people lose time and fall behind those who actively pursue their goals. The speaker views life as a competition, where students and peers vie for top positions and opportunities. Delaying tasks, like homework or chores, puts individuals at a disadvantage in this competition, limiting their future success.

10:04

👎 The Company You Keep

The third harmful behavior is surrounding oneself with negative influences. The speaker recalls a personal story about being pressured by a friend to vape, despite his initial resistance. This anecdote illustrates how bad company can lead individuals into habits they don’t truly believe in or value, emphasizing that peer pressure often stems from others’ desires to normalize their own harmful behaviors.

🗣️ The Consequences of Gossip

Talking behind others' backs is identified as another harmful behavior. The speaker shares a personal experience of gossiping about someone they cared for, leading to regret and guilt when the person found out. Gossiping is portrayed as a sign of insecurity and self-consciousness, damaging both the speaker's integrity and relationships.

💔 The Pitfalls of Promiscuity

The speaker addresses the negative consequences of promiscuity, citing studies that show how sleeping around decreases the likelihood of happiness in long-term relationships and marriages. Promiscuity is also linked to health risks like the spread of diseases, making it one of the most harmful choices for ruining one’s life.

🍔 Unhealthy Eating Habits

The speaker reflects on societal pressure to indulge in unhealthy eating, sharing a story about being mocked for avoiding sugary treats at a family gathering. The message is that giving in to such habits leads to long-term health issues like obesity. Discipline in eating is portrayed as essential for maintaining health, and ignoring this discipline can set one on a downward path.

😬 Lack of Discipline

Lack of discipline is another harmful trait. The speaker explains how doing whatever feels easy or convenient—such as procrastinating or avoiding difficult tasks—will prevent personal growth. Though tasks like homework or working out may seem daunting initially, the speaker emphasizes how completing them brings satisfaction and proves to be easier than expected once started.

🎭 Seeking External Validation

Living to impress others, instead of focusing on personal fulfillment, is highlighted as a key way to ruin one’s life. The speaker argues that worrying about other people's opinions—especially those of peers one may never see again—leads to a life devoid of passion and fulfillment. Prioritizing personal happiness and pursuing individual goals is framed as essential for a meaningful life.

😶 Playing It Safe

The final and most harmful behavior, according to the speaker, is always taking the safe route in life. Playing it safe, while seemingly secure, leads to a life filled with regret and missed opportunities. The speaker encourages taking risks—whether by starting a business, pursuing a passion, or talking to someone new—because only through risk can one truly know what opportunities they might achieve.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Depression

Depression in the video refers to the high levels of sadness and dissatisfaction that many people experience in modern life. The speaker mentions that depression is at an all-time high, indicating that many people are unhappy with their lives. This ties into the theme of seeking fulfillment and the harmful behaviors that can lead to worsening mental health.

💡Dopamine

Dopamine is a chemical in the brain associated with feelings of pleasure and reward. In the context of the video, the speaker explains how activities like watching adult films can flood the brain with dopamine, giving temporary satisfaction without effort. This easy access to dopamine undermines long-term happiness, as the speaker contrasts it with more meaningful sources of dopamine like working out or learning.

💡Procrastination

Procrastination refers to delaying tasks or responsibilities. The speaker argues that procrastination ruins lives by slowing down progress toward important goals, giving others a competitive edge. By putting off tasks, people fall behind in life’s 'competition,' especially in school and career advancement, making procrastination a major barrier to success.

💡Peer pressure

Peer pressure is the influence exerted by a peer group that encourages individuals to conform to their behavior. The video recounts a story where the speaker was pressured by a friend into vaping, even though he thought it was a bad idea. This anecdote highlights how negative peer influences can lead to self-destructive behaviors, a recurring theme in the video.

💡Talking behind someone's back

Talking behind someone's back refers to making negative or hurtful comments about someone without their knowledge. The speaker shares a personal story where this behavior led to regret and damaged relationships. The video uses this example to emphasize how gossip can harm both the person doing it and the person being spoken about.

💡Promiscuity

Promiscuity, in the context of the video, refers to engaging in casual sexual relationships. The speaker warns that promiscuity not only lowers long-term happiness in relationships but also increases the risk of spreading diseases. This behavior is presented as a way to damage one’s life by making meaningful, committed relationships harder to maintain.

💡Discipline

Discipline refers to the ability to control one's behavior and make decisions that prioritize long-term goals over short-term gratification. The speaker suggests that a lack of discipline, such as eating unhealthy foods or avoiding difficult tasks, leads to personal failure. Discipline is framed as essential for achieving success and happiness.

💡Risk-taking

Risk-taking is about stepping outside one’s comfort zone and pursuing uncertain opportunities. The video suggests that playing it safe leads to a boring and unfulfilling life, and not taking risks is one of the best ways to 'ruin your life.' Taking risks, such as starting a business or pursuing a passion, is presented as necessary for personal growth and happiness.

💡Impressing others

Impressing others refers to living in a way that seeks the approval of other people rather than focusing on personal fulfillment. The speaker warns that trying to make others happy instead of yourself can lead to an unfulfilled life. This behavior is highlighted as one of the key ways to lose sight of one’s own goals and values.

💡Healthy habits

Healthy habits involve behaviors that contribute to physical and mental well-being, such as eating well, exercising, and avoiding harmful substances. The speaker argues that adopting healthy habits is essential for long-term happiness, and that giving in to unhealthy impulses, like eating junk food or vaping, can ruin one’s life by negatively affecting both physical and mental health.

Highlights

Watching adult films can lead to an unhealthy reliance on dopamine, desensitizing you to natural rewards.

Procrastination delays goal achievement and allows others who are proactive to surpass you.

Associating with negative influences can lead to adopting harmful habits like smoking, drinking, and drug use.

The desire to feel 'normal' can pressure individuals into partaking in activities they otherwise wouldn't.

Talking behind people's backs reflects insecurity and can damage relationships.

Promoting promiscuity can lead to decreased happiness in long-term relationships and increased health risks.

Undisciplined eating habits contribute to obesity and other health issues.

Lack of discipline can lead to a life of missed opportunities and unfulfilled potential.

Focusing on impressing others rather than oneself can lead to a life devoid of personal fulfillment.

Playing it safe and avoiding risks can result in a life without the joy of discovery and personal growth.

The importance of overcoming the fear of judgment to live a fulfilling life.

How societal pressure can influence individuals to engage in unhealthy behaviors.

The negative impact of gossip on personal integrity and interpersonal relationships.

The psychological effects of promiscuity on future relationship satisfaction.

The role of discipline in maintaining a healthy lifestyle and achieving long-term goals.

Why seeking external validation can lead to a lack of personal satisfaction and happiness.

The potential benefits of taking risks and stepping out of one's comfort zone.

The speaker's personal experience with the negative effects of vaping and peer pressure.

How the fear of missing out can lead to regrettable decisions and actions.

Transcripts

play00:00

most people hate their life depression

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is at an all-time high and people are

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simply unhappy with how they're living

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everybody on the internet on the other

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hand tells you what you should be doing

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how to make money how to be successful

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how to do the things that you want to do

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in your life but nobody's telling you

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what not to do I'm only 19 but recently

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I've discovered a lot of these things

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and how important they are so I'm going

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to go in order from least important to

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the most important the last being the

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worst things that you can do to

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literally ruin your life number one

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start watching corn when you watch adult

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films you probably feel embarrassed cuz

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a lot of people do this let's just be

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honest a lot of you watching this

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consistently do this on a weekly basis

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what's very hard to understand if you're

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not Forward Thinking is that when you do

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something like this watch adult films it

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gives your brain so much dopamine the

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happy chemical that tells you that

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you're doing something good and you

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didn't have to earn anything you didn't

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have to do anything you just pulled out

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your phone and gave your brain

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essentially a drug it's literally like a

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drug that you have at your disposal so

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when you do this you're slowly ruining

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what makes you happy natural dopamine

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will make you happy consistently because

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it's when you do things healthy like

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working out or eating good or just

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simply learning that gives you dopamine

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so if you want to ruin your life give

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yourself easy access to dopamine make

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sure that you can make yourself happy

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whenever you feel like it without having

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to earn it step number two to get on

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your way to ruining your life is going

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to be procrastination you should be

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putting off everything you do cuz it's

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not that important you have tomorrow you

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have the next day you have the rest of

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the month to do your tasks see you don't

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have to do everything right when when

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you get the responsibility your

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responsibilities can be put off to the

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last second this is how the majority of

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all of your peers think everybody your

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age right now if you're a teenager

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watching this thinks this way deep down

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you know that you shouldn't be

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procrastinating at least I hope you do

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but I think if you're watching a video

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like this you definitely care the

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question is why does procrastination

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ruin your life well the answer is very

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simple it takes you longer to reach your

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goals whether it's a homework assignment

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chores cleaning your room reading a book

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it literally does not matter what it is

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the longer that you put it off the

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quicker that the people who actually

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care about their life are going to get

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ahead of you see in the world in my

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opinion everything is somewhat of a

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competition you need to understand that

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the people in your school are competing

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against you to be the best in the school

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they're competing to be the valid

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dictorian the person who has the best

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grades people want to make the most

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money get into the best schools if you

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don't want that I think that you're just

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lacking something in your life you

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should want the best for yourself so if

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you want to ruin your chances at that

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you need to procrastinate step number

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three hang out with all of the friends

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that you really like it doesn't matter

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who it is if you want to ruin your life

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I highly recommend finding the people

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who are going to drag you down the most

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the people who are doing things that you

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don't want to do smoking drinking doing

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drugs let's be honest here that's corny

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to say these things about Don't drink

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don't smoke the reason it's corny is

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because people don't want you to be

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above them I used to have this old

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friend and he used to vape all the time

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he had this Vape he thought it was so

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cool it was in Middle School and I never

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really saw any enjoyment in that I

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thought it was pretty dumb it's like why

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would you inhale Vapor that is literally

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damaging your lungs and consistently

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hurting your health I thought that's

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such a dumb thing and he actually ended

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up convincing me one night he came over

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to my house and we were talking and he's

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like hey I got this new Vape it's a

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nicotine-free vape so you can do it and

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in the back of my head I was like well

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I'm not not vaping because there's no

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nicotine or because there's nicotine I'm

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not doing it just because I think it's

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dumb like I don't think it's a smart

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thing to do why would I do something

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that could potentially harm me without

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like any benefit like what do I gain if

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I Vape you you know what I mean and So

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eventually he was just con convincing me

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over and over and over to do this and I

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did it I crumbled under the pressure and

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I hit this Vape when I was very young

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and as soon as I did it I felt this

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instant regret it shot through my like

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body in my my face I would literally

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like blew up all red and right after I

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did that he said it's not nicotine fore

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this is just a normal Vape see it's fun

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or whatever see the thing is people want

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to feel normal and what I learned from

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that story is that he wanted to feel

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normal and he wanted to feel okay with

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doing that even though he knew it was

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wrong and he would have never made me do

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it if he actually cared about me when

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people do things that they feel ashamed

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of they want other people to do them

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because then it becomes normal and then

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they don't have to feel bad about it so

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step three to ruining your life is

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finding people who drag you down step

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number four to ruining your life is

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talking behind people's back if I'm

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being completely honest with you guys

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I'm not perfect this is actually one of

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my flaws and something that I've gotten

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so much better at recently but I

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struggled with my entire life for some

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reason I felt some sort of enjoyment

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when it came to talking behind people's

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back when in reality you should never do

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this it makes you look self-conscious it

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makes you look extremely insecure and

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that you feel bad about yourself so you

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have to bring other people down one time

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in high school there was this person I

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really really cared about and for some

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reason I said some bad stuff about her

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to some of my friends just making jokes

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it was nothing harsh but I I really

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shouldn't have said these things and we

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just laughed about it you know it went

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away for me it was a very very small

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time of enjoyment like 30 seconds 30

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seconds we had this laugh it went on

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somebody sitting near me actually heard

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that and told her and then it got back

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to me that she heard about it and I felt

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disgusted with myself I felt like I did

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something that I should have never done

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I was not in the place to talk bad about

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somebody especially when I truly didn't

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mean it if I was sitting there with her

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when I said that I would have never said

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it in the first place place so whenever

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you feel like talking about somebody

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picture that they're sitting right next

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to you would you say the things that you

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normally say about them the answer is

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probably no so if you want to ruin your

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life and make it a lot harder say things

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behind people's back because it's going

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to have a lot of damages to say the

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least step number five to ruining your

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life is becoming promiscuous AKA

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sleeping around sleep with as many girls

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as you can this is actually proven by

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multiple studies before that the more

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people you get with the less like lik L

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you are to be happy within a marriage or

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a long-term relationship and what's even

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crazier is that with each person it gets

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worse worse worse your chances at being

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happy with somebody longterm gets lower

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and lower not only that but you could

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literally be spreading diseases this one

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is so bad I just like I I don't even

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want to talk about it if you want to

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ruin your life this is a very quick and

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easy way to do that step number six eat

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whatever makes you happy see in America

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or just honestly all over the world

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obesity is becoming a massive problem

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and we're always told that you need to

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enjoy life you have people all around

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you always saying that you need to do

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things that make you happy I remember

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this specific story and it really

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impacted me it was around Christmas time

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I went to my grandma's house for

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Christmas cuz we always celebrate and I

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wasn't eating the Sweet Treats cuz I was

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on some sort of a diet like I just

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wanted to eat healthy I wouldn't even

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say it was a diet I genuinely was just

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trying to avoid sugar and everybody

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around even my family members were

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making fun of me for not eating sugar

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because I wanted to be healthy they were

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making fun of me for not wanting to do

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that like is that not crazy has that

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happened to any of you cuz I'm sure it's

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happened to me many times anytime I've

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ever tried to take my eating seriously

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people joke about it and once again just

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like the doing drugs thing just like

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everything else it's because they feel

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bad about thems the fact that you have

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the discipline to do things to not eat

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things that you want to eat because they

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taste good but you decide not to eat

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them because you prioritize your health

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that sort of thing gets made fun of

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because not many people can do that so

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if you want to be like everybody else

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and send your life on a downward track

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and especially ruin your health as you

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get older just eat whatever you want

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don't be disciplined in fact that

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actually is tip number seven don't be

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disciplined do whatever you want

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whenever you want when I was sitting in

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the other room just now I didn't

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actually want to make this video but now

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I'm very glad that I'm here especially

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since I'm past the halfway point see

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there's a lot of things that I realized

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in my life like whenever it came to

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doing homework or whatever once you're

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in the middle of doing it you realize a

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few things number one it's not as bad as

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you thought it's not as hard as you

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thought and it doesn't take as long as

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you thought as long as you're focused so

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if you want to ruin your life just do

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whatever you want procrastinate you know

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it's not that big of a deal to do the

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things that are right in front of you

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wake up at whatever time you want go to

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sleep at whatever time you want it just

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doesn't matter right tip number eight to

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ruining your life is only impressing

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other people don't worry about

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impressing yourself because other people

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at the end of the day are the main

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people watching you like you're only one

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person there's billions of people in the

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world isn't it more important that

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they're happy of what you're doing isn't

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it more important that your parents are

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happy that your friends are happy I

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actually think this is one of the best

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ways to ruin your life because you're

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not going to act based on your gut

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instinct you're not going to do things

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that make you feel fulfilled in life

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you're going to impress these other

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people outside that you're probably

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never going to see again especially if

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you're in high school you're probably

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never going to see most of the people

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from high school so if you impress them

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that's going to end really good for you

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right if you don't do the things that

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you're passionate about and in life

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because these people in your high school

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are going to feel happy about that

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that's like that's good right that's

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what you want to do if you want to ruin

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your life the simple answer is yes go

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and do things that make other people

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happy and don't worry about what you

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think will make you happy tip number 10

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and like I said I save the most

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important for

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last take the safe way out of Life play

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by the book do everything safe do

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everything that you've been told to do

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because nothing else taking risks isn't

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important if you want to ruin your life

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this is one of the best things to do

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because it's going to be safe right I

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actually think that this is the opposite

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of the truth when you play things safe

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you end up with a life that might suck

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now I'm not saying don't go to college

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I'm not saying don't focus on school you

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should be doing all of those things when

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I say this I'm saying what you should do

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is go talk to that girl go do the thing

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that makes you happy go do your side

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passion on the side of what you're doing

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go maybe even take the risk and start

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your own business because if you don't

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do it you'll never know but I mean if

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you want to ruin your life one of the

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best things that you can do is never

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take the risk in the first place and

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play it safe I hope this video helped

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you guys learn what not to do I'll see

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you in the next one

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