Did I Ever Choose To Be Muslim? | Why Me? EP. 10 | Dr. Omar Suleiman | A Ramadan Series on Qadar

Summary

The video reflects on how personal challenges and crises often lead to deep spiritual questioning, particularly about faith and belief in Allah. It addresses the struggle of maintaining faith, the fluctuating nature of iman (faith), and the impact of personal experiences, trauma, and intellectual doubts. The speaker highlights that faith is not stagnant, and believers are urged to seek renewal and redemption, as even sins or life hardships can guide one back to Allah. Through reflection, prayer, and humility, one can rekindle their relationship with Islam, making the journey back to faith a source of growth and spiritual revival.

Takeaways

• ⚡ Some events cause shock and confusion, leading to deep existential questions about faith and identity.
• ❓ People often question their faith, wondering if they believe because of personal conviction or simply due to upbringing.
• 💡 Struggles and challenges can help one rediscover faith and experience the sweetness of belief.
• 🛠️ Iman (faith) fluctuates, and low points in faith are reminders to seek renewal, not signs of its absence.
• 🔥 Personal trauma or life experiences can lead to intellectual or emotional conflicts with faith, but these should be properly diagnosed.
• 🙏 Islam provides answers to intellectual questions, though some may challenge personal sensibilities, requiring trust in divine wisdom.
• 🌿 Personal struggles and turning back to Allah can be a pathway to spiritual redemption and growth.
• 🔄 Even past sins can become catalysts for renewal and are opportunities for a fresh start in one's faith journey.
• 🌟 Converts to Islam or those who rediscover faith experience spiritual transformation and can raise their status by deepening their commitment.
• 🎯 The true fear is not the difficulty in finding the path to Allah, but being led astray by desires. Faith requires constant renewal and effort.

Q & A

What causes people to question their faith after a shocking event?

Shocking events can lead to confusion and existential questions, especially when the shock fades, forcing individuals to re-evaluate their beliefs and identity, questioning if their faith is truly their own or influenced by others like their parents.

What does the Prophet's (SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam) hadith about faith wearing out suggest?

The hadith suggests that faith, like a shirt, can wear out over time. It encourages asking Allah to renew faith in our hearts, acknowledging that iman (faith) fluctuates and needs constant renewal.

Why is struggle often necessary for renewing one's faith?

Struggle acts as a catalyst that pushes individuals to seek deeper understanding and renewal of their faith. While it’s not the only way, it can be the most effective push to reignite a person's connection with Allah.

How does the experience of low iman differ from a lack of iman?

Low iman is not the same as no iman. It serves as a warning to replenish and strengthen one's faith, while a lack of iman indicates a deeper spiritual crisis. Low iman is a temporary state, not the end.

What is the significance of personal reminders and the verse from Surah Ar-Ra'd (13:28)?

The verse calls believers to humble their hearts to the remembrance of Allah, implying that even those who already know the truth may need a reminder to reconnect with it. It emphasizes the importance of conscious renewal of faith.

What lesson can we learn from the experiences of Khabbab ibn al-Aratt?

Khabbab's story teaches that the struggles and sacrifices in the path of faith lead to a deep attachment and value for Islam. Despite the severe persecution he faced, it strengthened his faith, and this struggle was part of his spiritual growth.

What can we learn from how some people question their faith after trauma?

It is important to distinguish between intellectual doubts and emotional trauma. Sometimes, personal experiences, such as abuse or loss, are projected onto Islam, leading to doubts about the faith, even though the issue lies with the experience, not the religion itself.

How does the story of Musa (Alayhi Salaam) and al-Khidr illustrate the importance of trusting Allah?

Musa's reaction to witnessing al-Khidr's actions illustrates that personal suffering and confusion do not mean accusing Allah. It reminds us to trust that Allah’s wisdom surpasses our limited understanding and that sometimes faith requires accepting the unknown.

What role did Salman al-Farisi's journey play in shaping his faith?

Salman al-Farisi's journey, filled with hardship and curiosity, transformed him into a man of deep faith. His path to Islam was not straightforward, but every struggle contributed to his profound understanding and devotion to Allah.

What is the significance of repentance in Islam, as seen in the story of Kab ibn Malik?

Kab ibn Malik's story illustrates that sincere repentance can lead to a complete transformation. His repentance was so sincere that the Prophet (SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam) said it was the best day of his life, showing that returning to Allah after sin is a source of immense blessing and renewal.

Outlines

00:00

🤔 The Struggle of Faith and Iman

This paragraph explores the emotional and existential challenges that arise after experiencing a significant life event. It questions the nature of faith, belief in Allah, and the struggle between inherited religion and personal conviction. The Prophet Muhammad's (S.A.W.) teaching about faith wearing out like a shirt is mentioned, encouraging believers to ask Allah to renew their iman (faith). It highlights how iman fluctuates with life's challenges and emphasizes that low iman doesn't equate to no iman, urging a return to faith through reflection and renewed conviction.

05:38

🧠 Personal Trauma vs. Intellectual Doubts

Here, the script discusses how unresolved personal trauma can be mistaken for intellectual doubt about Islam. The example of Musa (A.S.) witnessing a difficult event in his life and struggling to understand Allah’s wisdom is compared to how personal experiences, like abuse, can create doubt about Islam's teachings. The paragraph advises not to confuse personal pain with intellectual uncertainty and to rely on Allah's wisdom when answers seem unclear. The journey of faith often involves grappling with such personal challenges.

10:40

🌱 Growth Through Struggles and Redemption

This paragraph reflects on how life's struggles and sins can lead to spiritual growth and redemption. Using examples from early Islamic history, such as Salman al-Farisi's journey to Islam and Ka'b ibn Malik's repentance, it illustrates how trials, whether intellectual or personal, shape one's faith. The concept of sincere tawbah (repentance) being akin to rebirth is emphasized, alongside the idea that Allah can transform sins into good deeds. It concludes with the importance of returning to Allah and viewing life's twists as part of a divine plan.

Keywords

💡Iman

Iman refers to faith or belief in Islam. It is a core concept in the video, as the speaker discusses how faith can fluctuate over time and how it is important to seek renewal of one's Iman. The Prophet Muhammad's (PBUH) saying that 'faith wears out in your heart just like a shirt becomes worn out' emphasizes the need to constantly ask Allah to refresh one’s belief.

💡Qadr

Qadr is the Islamic concept of divine destiny. The video talks about how one's faith can ebb and flow with the tides of Qadr, meaning that life’s events, both good and bad, are part of Allah’s plan. The speaker mentions that people may struggle with their faith due to the challenges Qadr brings, but these challenges can ultimately bring them closer to Allah.

💡Shaytan

Shaytan (Satan) represents temptation and spiritual deception. In the video, Shaytan is described as trying to convince believers that having low faith (low Iman) is the same as having no faith at all. This creates a sense of urgency to refuel one’s faith before falling into despair or losing trust in Allah.

💡Tawbah

Tawbah refers to repentance or seeking forgiveness from Allah. It is presented in the video as a way to cleanse past sins and return to Allah. The speaker emphasizes that repentance is not just a one-time act but can mark the beginning of a new chapter in one’s life, as shown through the example of Ka’b ibn Malik, who repented and was reborn spiritually.

💡Khabab ibn al-Aratt

Khabab ibn al-Aratt was a companion of the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) who endured severe persecution for his faith. The video uses his story to highlight the contrast between those who had to struggle for Islam and those who were born into it. His son, Abdullah, lived a peaceful life, but Khabab’s suffering made him treasure his faith deeply.

💡Personal trauma

Personal trauma refers to emotional or psychological wounds that can influence one’s spiritual journey. The video highlights how unresolved trauma can lead to doubt in faith. An example given is how someone might project their disgust from an abusive family situation onto Islam, confusing personal pain with an intellectual or spiritual issue.

💡Al-Khabir

Al-Khabir is one of the names of Allah, meaning 'the All-Aware' or 'the One who knows all things.' The video refers to Allah as Al-Khabir in the context of trusting His wisdom, especially during difficult times when no clear answers are present. It encourages believers to have faith in Allah’s greater knowledge even when life is uncertain or painful.

💡Salman al-Farisi

Salman al-Farisi was a companion of the Prophet who went on a long and difficult journey to find the truth of Islam. The video uses his story to illustrate how struggle can shape one’s faith and character. Had he stayed in Persia, he might have lived a mundane life, but his quest for faith made him an important figure in Islamic history.

💡Shahadah

Shahadah is the Islamic declaration of faith, stating that 'there is no god but Allah, and Muhammad is His messenger.' The video discusses how taking Shahadah cleanses a person’s past sins and marks their spiritual rebirth. Even for those born into Islam, returning to their faith after straying can feel like a second Shahadah, a chance to renew their connection with Allah.

💡Sweetness of Iman

The 'sweetness of Iman' refers to the deep fulfillment and joy that comes from a strong and sincere faith. The video emphasizes that this sweetness is often tasted after struggle and sacrifice, as seen in the stories of converts and companions like Khabbab. For born Muslims, rediscovering this sweetness can come through a renewed understanding and appreciation of their faith.

Highlights

The aftermath of shock can lead to deep existential questions about faith, identity, and purpose.

The struggle to find Islam often leads to the sweetness of Iman, and renewal of faith is a personal journey.

Low iman is not the same as no iman. It's a warning to refill one's tank of faith.

Sometimes, we don't appreciate the light until we experience the darkness, which can reignite our faith.

A hard reminder can act as a personal redemption story rather than a conversion one.

The fear of losing Islam is real when a generation that didn't experience ignorance is born into the faith.

Khabbab's story of enduring torture for Islam contrasts with the peaceful life of his son, showing the value of struggle.

Unresolved personal trauma, rather than intellectual issues, often creates doubt about faith.

Projecting personal trauma onto Islam is understandable, but it is not a reflection of the religion itself.

The story of Musa 'Alayhi Salaam shows how a difficult test of faith doesn't mean accusing Allah, but seeking understanding.

Salman al-Farisi's journey and hardships shaped him into the person he became, teaching that every twist in life is part of one's destiny.

Repentance, like Shahadah, erases past sins, and one's journey back to Allah can be a chance for spiritual rebirth.

A sin that brings you back to Allah can be better than a good deed that distances you from Him.

Allah can transform past sins into good deeds through sincere repentance, giving hope for a new beginning.

Rediscovering one's faith is a continuous process, and the fear is not confusion, but being overcome by worldly desires.

Transcripts

- Some events leave us reeling from shock.

But then once the shock wears off, the aftermath can lead us

to all sorts of existential questions.

Wake up calls are almost never as simple

as people think they are.

They can leave us more confused than ever before

and make us question everything we thought we knew.

People are telling me to come back to Allah,

but am I a believer in the first place?

What if I believe just because my parents do?

But if I don't have faith, then who am I?

What am I?

What life do I really deep down want to live?

Why is it that some people leave behind everything

you could ever want for Islam while others who had Islam

handed to them are so ready to throw it all away?

Sometimes the struggle to find Islam is the reason

why you get to taste the sweetness of Iman.

Now, struggle might not be the only way to renew your faith,

but it might be the only thing that pushes you to do so.

And the Prophet SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam said

innal imana la yakhlaku fijawfi ahadikum kamaa yakhlakuthaub

That verily faith wears out in your heart just like a shirt

becomes worn out,

fa salullaha an yujadidal imana fi qullubikum

So ask Allah to renew the faith in your hearts.

Our iman goes up and down with the tides of our qadr,

but it's never stagnant

and we're all going to have points of our lives

where we have lower iman

and Shaytan is going to try to convince you

that low iman is the same as no iman and it's not.

It's just a warning to refill your tank of faith.

And sometimes we don't appreciate the light that we had

until we get lost in the dark,

and that's when Allah sends a spark to reignite that flame.

Alam ya' nidhilladhina aamanu an takhsha a qullubuhum

bidhikrillahi wa ma nazallah minal haq

Hasn't the time come for those who believe

to humble their hearts to the remembrance of Allah

and the truth that he revealed?

You already know Allah and you know the truth,

but you need a hard reminder to back to it.

And maybe it's not your conversion story,

but it is your redemption story.

But the urgency of getting it right has to be there.

In fact, 'Umar radiAllahu Anhu used to say,

"I fear a day that Islam will be lost

idha nasha'a fil Islam man lam ya' li fil jahilliyah

When a generation is born into Islam

that doesn't understand the days of ignorance.

I want you to imagine being

Abdullah ibn Khabbab ibn al Aratt.

You're born in Madinah

and you awake to the masjid of the

Prophet SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam

and a ton of companions around you also righteous.

You grow up in the shade of the Quran.

Everything around you is about Islam.

And as you're narrating hadiths from your dad one day

you ask your dad why he has these severe burns

on his neck and his back.

And your dad, Khabbab starts to tell you about

how he was enslaved in Makkah,

and his master used to pour hot coal down his back

until she burned off all of the flesh.

Why? Because he wouldn't stop saying

la ilaha illAllah.

Think about how opposite Abdullah's life

was from his father Khabbab.

But that struggle was part

of why Khabbab treasured his fate so much.

Now, if we're not feeling that attachment,

we have to start with diagnosing our distance properly.

Sometimes it's an intellectual battle

about a specific issue, and more often than that,

it's unresolved personal trauma.

Now, if it's really intellectual,

the Prophet SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam

said that the cure to ignorance

is just to ask.

And you'll always find that there are convincing answers

in Islam that do make sense even if they don't agree

with your sensibilities.

And even then you come back to Allah knows best

because this is clearly divine revelation.

And this prophet is clearly a prophet from Allah.

But sometimes we wrongly identify a bad personal experience

as an intellectual problem.

So for example, you know a family member that was abused

by your husband, and then you take that disgust

that you have and you transfer it into doubt,

and then you project that doubt onto the character

of Islam instead of the abusive husband.

And it's understandable why that happens,

even if it's not right.

Imagine how Musa 'Alayhi Salaam felt when he sees al-Khidr

kill a young boy in Surah Al Kahf

when Musa himself survived a genocide

of children at the hands of Firawn.

And any one of us would've had an uncomfortable reaction

to that qadr, but especially him.

But notice he doesn't accuse Allah in that episode.

He's just trying to come to terms with it.

And in reality, when you're personally in the heat

of the moment and have no answers at all,

that's when you might learn

to have the most faith in Al-Khabir,

the One who knows all the answers.

Take for example, Salman al Farisi.

If he was just born in Madinah

and became Muslim along with the other ansaar,

do you really think he would've been the same person?

On the other hand, if he would've stayed in Persia

and not let his curiosity about faith take him

on this incredible journey in the first place,

he would've been Rouzbeh ibn Razban,

a footnote in the Persian empire defeated by the Muslims.

But every moment of torture, every teacher he meets,

every journey he travels,

every moment he spends in slavery is part

of the construction of Salman al-Farisi.

And just like him, when Allah created you in the womb

of your mother and then brought you out into this world,

he wasn't finished creating you

and whatever makes us turn back to Allah

with all of its twists and turns is ultimately

going to be a blessing.

And just like taking Shahadah does away with all of the sins

that come before it,

sincere tawbah does the exact same thing.

When Kab ibn Malik repented to Allah years

after he already became Muslim,

the Prophet SallAllahu 'Alaihi Wasallam tells him

abshir bikhairi yawmin marra 'alayka munduna datka um'uk

this is the best day of your life

since your mother gave birth to you.

Because whether you come to Islam the first time

or come back to it again, it's a chance to be reborn.

But notice for Kab, it was a sin that was his catalyst

to come back to Allah.

So even if we may not be proud of our past,

it is part of our story.

But your sin doesn't have to be the end of your story.

It can be the beginning of your redemption instead.

And just like with someone who becomes Muslim

for the very first time, Allah can turn all of those sins

into good deeds.

aola-ikayubaddilu Allahu sayyi-atihim hasanat

Those are the ones who Allah converts

all of their sins into good deeds.

And as ibn al Qayyim Rahimahullah said

A sin that brings you back to Allah

is better than a good deed that takes you away

because it gives you the necessary urgency

and humility to come back.

It could be a near-death experience facing the consequences

of your sins or the emptiness of an otherwise seemingly

perfect life that sets you back on a pursuit of Allah

spiritually and intellectually.

Now, if you're a convert that had to find Islam fresh,

you've already tasted the sweetness of faith

and what an incredible reward that awaits you.

You've shown that you are willing to give up everything

for this precious gift of Islam, and Allah has so much more

to give you in exchange for it all.

And if you had parents that raised you in Islam

and taught you how to rise up, what an amazing opportunity

to raise your rank beyond even what they taught you.

Allah gave you a headstart.

So don't squander the opportunity.

Ponder upon the lines

Yaa rabbi razaqtanil Islam

walam as aluk faarzuqnil jannati wa anaa as aluk

O Allah, you granted me Islam

and I didn't even ask you for it.

So grant me, Jannah, and I am asking you for it.

Things are going to happen to each one of us

to make us rediscover why we're Muslim in the first place

and how Muslim we want to be.

But that renewal isn't a one-time thing,

and it's never hard to find your way back

so long as you're really trying.

Laa yukhaafu alayka antal tabisat tariku alyaka

wa innama yu khaafu 'alayka min ghalabatil hawaa 'alayka

What is feared is not that the ways leading

to Allah will be confusing to you.

Rather, what is feared is that your desires

will overcome you.

Somehow Allah is speaking to you, but are you listening?

And are you willing to act?

Rabbana innana samiAAnamunadiyan

yunadee lil-eemani an aminoobirabbikum faamanna

rabbana faghfirlana thunoobana wakaffir AAannasayyi-atina

watawaffana maAAa al-abrar

our Lord, we heard the one who was calling to faith,

calling on us to believe in you, so we believed.

Our Lord, so forgive us of our sins,

absolve us of our misdeeds,

and allow us to die as one of the righteous.

But that doesn't mean you aren't still going

to have some questions that trouble you,

but what do you do when you feel like Allah

isn't listening to your concerns?

Has he not welcomed you back?

Is it too late?

Captioning provided by MUHSEN (www.muhsen.org)

Captioning provided by MUHSEN (www.muhsen.org)