Sarah Kay & Phil Kaye "When Love Arrives"

speakeasynyc

9 Jun 201205:03

Summary

TLDRThe script is a poignant narrative of love's evolution from youthful idealization to a more complex, mature reality. It humorously describes the author's early expectations of love, only to find it in unexpected forms. The story unfolds to reveal love's imperfections, the shared quirks, and the deep emotional connections that define it. It concludes with a reflection on love's unpredictable nature, emphasizing the importance of cherishing it in all its forms.

Takeaways

👦 Early expectations of love are often idealized and don't always match reality.
🎸 Love can be found in unexpected places and forms, contrary to initial assumptions.
🚌 Love may not share all of your interests or preferences, but that doesn't make it any less real.
👩‍❤️‍👨 Love can be imperfect and still be the right fit; it's about finding comfort in the unique quirks of another.
🕺 Love can be awkward and ungraceful, yet still lead to beautiful moments together.
📞 Love involves patience and understanding, especially when communication is challenging.
🌱 Love evolves and changes over time, sometimes growing and sometimes fading away.
🌎 Love can be found in different places and at different times,不受地域和时间的限制.
👵 Love can reappear in different forms and at different stages of life, showing its enduring nature.
🍪 Love is not just about grand gestures but also about the small, everyday acts of kindness and care.
🚗 Love is messy and imperfect, but it's these imperfections that often make it feel real and relatable.

Q & A

What did the speaker initially imagine love would look like in seventh grade?
-The speaker imagined love wearing a hemp necklace, having a tight French braid, playing acoustic guitar, knowing all their favorite Beatles songs, and not being afraid to ride the bus with them.
How did the speaker's perception of love change when it actually arrived?
-When love actually arrived, it had a bowl cut, wore the same clothes every day for a week, hated the bus, and didn't know anything about the Beatles. It also had a terrible rhythm on the dance floor.
What did the speaker learn about love from the experience of their first encounter with it?
-The speaker learned that love can be unexpected and doesn't always match one's initial expectations. It can be imperfect and messy, with teeth getting in the way of kisses and terrible dancing.
How did the speaker describe the evolution of love over time?
-The speaker described love as evolving, changing, and growing like a trampoline. It slowly disappeared like baby teeth and reappeared years later smelling different, with darker eyes, a broader back, freckles, and a softer voice.
What are some of the new characteristics of love that the speaker noticed when it reappeared?
-When love reappeared, it had new birthmarks, new sleeping patterns, new favorite books, and songs that reminded it of someone else. It also had a different sense of humor and a new way of communicating.
How did the speaker's view of love's imperfections change over time?
-Initially, the speaker saw love as perfect and idealized. Over time, they learned to accept love's imperfections, such as being a terrible driver, being messy, chewing too loud, and leaving the cap off the toothpaste.
What did the speaker realize about love's impact on their life?
-The speaker realized that love can be a reason to lie to parents, wait by the phone, and change one's plans. It can also make them feel beautiful even when they don't believe it themselves.
How does the speaker suggest we should react when love arrives or leaves?
-The speaker suggests that when love arrives, we should welcome it and make it comfortable. When love leaves, we should ask it to leave the door open behind it and listen to the quiet whisper of gratitude for its presence.
What is the significance of the applause and the speaker's comment about Australians at the end of the script?
-The applause signifies the end of the speaker's performance and the audience's appreciation. The comment about Australians being too nice is a light-hearted acknowledgment of the warm reception and the cultural context of the audience.
How does the speaker's narrative reflect the universality of love's unpredictability?
-The speaker's narrative reflects the universality of love's unpredictability by showing that love can be found in different places, at different times, and can change forms. It suggests that love is not always ready when we are, and we are not always ready for love.
What message does the speaker convey about the beauty of love?
-The speaker conveys that the beauty of love is not just in its perfection but also in its imperfections. Love can make someone feel beautiful even in their most vulnerable moments, and this is a message that should be remembered and cherished.

Outlines

00:00

💔 The Evolution of Love

The speaker humorously recounts their early expectations of love in seventh grade, envisioning it as someone who fits a specific, idealized image. However, they discover that love is not what they expected. It arrives in the form of someone with a bowl cut and mismatched clothes, who doesn't share their taste in music or activities. Despite the initial mismatch, love evolves into a complex and imperfect relationship filled with awkward moments, lies, and shared experiences. The speaker acknowledges the changes love undergoes over time, from the initial idealized image to a more realistic and accepting view of love's imperfections. They reflect on how love can be messy, unpredictable, and sometimes painful, yet still beautiful and comforting. The narrative concludes with the realization that love is not always perfect or timely, but it arrives and leaves as it should, and its presence should be cherished.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Love

Love in the script is portrayed as a complex and evolving concept. It's not just a feeling but a series of experiences and changes that occur over time. The script uses various examples to illustrate this, such as 'love wore a hemp necklace' and 'love had a bowl cut,' showing that love doesn't conform to a single image or expectation. It evolves from idealized notions of what love should look like to a more realistic and accepting view of love's imperfections.

💡Expectations

Expectations are the beliefs or anticipations about how something will happen. In the context of the script, the speaker initially has certain expectations about what love will look like, such as 'love played acoustic guitar,' but these expectations are challenged as they encounter the reality of love, which is often different and less idealized.

💡Reality

Reality, as used in the script, contrasts with the idealized image of love. It refers to the actual experiences and characteristics of love that the speaker encounters, such as 'love had terrible rhythm on the dance floor.' The script suggests that while our expectations for love may be grand, the reality is often more mundane and imperfect.

💡Change

Change is a central theme in the script, emphasizing how love and relationships evolve over time. The speaker describes how love 'grew stretched like a trampoline' and 'love changed,' illustrating that love is not static but is subject to growth and transformation. This is a key message of the video, showing that love can be fluid and dynamic.

💡Imperfection

Imperfection is highlighted in the script to convey the idea that love is not perfect and does not always meet our idealized standards. Phrases like 'love didn't know anything about the Beatles' and 'love chews too loud' serve to humanize love, showing that it comes with flaws and imperfections, which are part of its authenticity.

💡Authenticity

Authenticity refers to the quality of being genuine and true to oneself. The script suggests that while we may have preconceived notions of love, the authentic experience of love is often different. It's about accepting the real person and the real emotions, as shown when the speaker says 'love will tell you you are beautiful and mean it.'

💡Discovery

Discovery in the script represents the process of finding and understanding love. The speaker initially believes they are 'searching the wrong classroom' but eventually discovers that love was there all along, just not in the form they expected. This highlights the journey of self-discovery and the realization that love can be found in unexpected places.

💡Acceptance

Acceptance is the act of embracing what is, rather than what we wish to be. The script shows the speaker accepting the reality of love, including its imperfections, as in 'love is messier now.' It's about acknowledging and appreciating love for what it truly is, not just what we imagine it to be.

💡Time

Time is a significant element in the script, indicating the duration and changes in relationships. The speaker mentions 'love stayed away for years' and 'the next time you see love is 20 years after the divorce,' showing how love can be fleeting or enduring, and how our experiences of it can change significantly over time.

💡Beauty

Beauty in the script is not just physical attractiveness but also encompasses the deeper qualities that make someone special. The repeated phrase 'you are beautiful' is used to emphasize the speaker's love and appreciation for the other person, even in moments of vulnerability or when they don't believe it themselves.

💡Presence

Presence refers to the state of being present or existing in a place or time. The script uses this concept to talk about the arrival and departure of love, as in 'love arrives exactly when love is supposed to and love leaves exactly when love must.' It suggests that love's presence is not always predictable or within our control.

Highlights

The narrator's early vision of love in seventh grade, symbolized by specific traits and interests.

The realization that love doesn't always match the initial expectations.

Love's imperfections, such as bad rhythm and mismatched interests, becoming endearing qualities.

The transformative nature of love, growing and changing over time.

The eventual disappearance of love, likened to losing baby teeth.

The unexpected return of love, with changes that were both subtle and profound.

The evolution of love's appearance and habits, including new songs and sleeping patterns.

The discovery of shared experiences and humor in a mature relationship.

The acceptance of love's flaws, such as being a terrible driver but a great navigator.

The messiness of love, with habits like chewing loudly and leaving the toothpaste cap off.

The vulnerability of love, showing both its strength and fragility.

The importance of recognizing and affirming one's beauty, especially when love is present.

The unpredictability of love's timing and its impact on life's journey.

The potential for love to be fleeting or enduring, depending on the circumstances.

The advice to welcome love when it arrives and to let it leave with grace.

The acknowledgment of love's imperfections and the importance of remembering its impact.

The audience's warm reception and the narrator's appreciation for their kindness.