The TRAP of the HIGH-VALUE woman: every restaurant serves water
Summary
TLDRDr. Orion Taban discusses the 'Trap of the High Value Woman' in relationships, emphasizing the importance of understanding a man's perspective. He highlights the common issue where women, particularly in their 30s, seek relationships without offering unique value. Taban suggests that to attract a high-value man, women should consider providing consistent fantastic sex, child rearing, and obedient agreeableness to improve his quality of life. He challenges the stigma around traditional roles like cooking and cleaning, framing them as opportunities for intimate integration and value provision.
Takeaways
- 👨⚕️ Dr. Orion Taban discusses the challenges high-value women face in finding fulfilling relationships from a man's perspective.
- 🤔 The importance of understanding a man's perspective is highlighted, drawing a parallel to the necessity of understanding a customer's needs in marketing.
- 💬 Women in their 30s seeking advice on starting a family often struggle with the expectations and commitments that come with relationships and family life.
- 🎭 Role-play scenarios illustrate the difficulty women face in articulating their value to a potential partner beyond career and education.
- 👨💼 Men with high value often already have support systems in place, diminishing the perceived value of a woman's professional accomplishments.
- 👶 The conversation around children and child-rearing reveals the reluctance of many women to give up their careers for full-time parenting.
- 💑 The expectation of a 50/50 partnership in child-rearing and household responsibilities is contrasted with the desire for a more successful partner.
- 💃 Three key areas where women can provide value to a high-value man are identified: consistent fantastic sex, child rearing, and obedient agreeableness.
- 🛒 Despite the possibility of purchasing services for sex, child rearing, and household help, there remains a stigma that offers an opportunity for women to fill these roles.
- 🍲 Cooking and cleaning are presented as opportunities for women to integrate into a man's lifestyle, rather than as low-value labor.
- 💡 The script challenges the pride that may prevent women from considering roles traditionally seen as servitude, suggesting it could be a path to intimacy and value in a relationship.
Q & A
What is the main topic of Dr. Orion taban's talk?
-The main topic of Dr. Orion taban's talk is the 'Trap of the High Value Woman' and how women can better understand the perspective of men to achieve the relationships they desire.
Why does Dr. Orion taban emphasize the importance of understanding a man's perspective?
-Understanding a man's perspective is crucial because it allows women to make a value proposition that resonates with men, similar to how businesses must understand their potential customers to offer products that meet their needs.
What does Dr. Orion taban suggest is a common issue faced by women in their 30s seeking relationships?
-A common issue is that women in their 30s are ready to start a family but struggle to find a suitable partner who meets their expectations and timeline, often due to a lack of understanding of what men value in a relationship.
What is the role-play scenario presented by Dr. Orion taban?
-The role-play scenario involves a woman approaching a high-value man, seeking a lifelong commitment and support for a family, and the man questioning what value she brings to him that he doesn't already have.
What are the three things that Dr. Orion taban suggests a woman can provide to a straight high-value man?
-The three things are consistent fantastic sex, children and child-rearing, and obedient agreeableness that improves the man's quality of life.
Why does Dr. Orion taban argue that women can still provide value in the marketplace despite the availability of services like cooking and cleaning?
-He argues that even though services exist, providing these services personally can offer intimate integration into the man's lifestyle and make the woman indispensable, which is valuable in a relationship.
What is Dr. Orion taban's stance on the idea that cooking and cleaning are low-value labor?
-He challenges this idea by comparing it to the service provided at a Michelin star restaurant, where even basic services are performed with excellence and enthusiasm, enhancing the overall experience. He suggests that these tasks can be opportunities for women to add value in a relationship.
How does Dr. Orion taban address the resistance from women towards performing tasks like cooking and cleaning?
-He suggests that the resistance is an issue of pride and ego, and that women should consider these tasks as opportunities to integrate into the man's life and provide value, rather than seeing them as servitude.
What advice does Dr. Orion taban give to women who want to find a successful man to marry and have children with?
-He advises them to be prepared to provide value that the man finds valuable, as a high-value man already has everything and may not need anything additional from a partner. He suggests finding ways to provide obedient agreeableness that work for the woman.
What does Dr. Orion taban consider to be women's greatest enemy?
-Dr. Orion taban considers pride to be women's greatest enemy, as it often prevents them from entering into the relationships they desire with the men they want.
What is the final call to action from Dr. Orion taban to his audience?
-He encourages the audience to reflect on whether the discussion fits with their own experiences and to share their thoughts in the comments, as well as to like the episode and consider subscribing to the channel or booking a paid one-on-one consultation.
Outlines
👨🏫 Dr. Orion Taban Discusses the 'Trap' of the High Value Woman
Dr. Orion Taban introduces the topic of the 'Trap' of the High Value Woman, emphasizing the importance of understanding a man's perspective when seeking a relationship. He shares his experience with consulting women, particularly those in their 30s looking to start a family, and the challenges they face in offering value in a relationship. Through a role-play scenario, he highlights the common issue of women struggling to articulate their unique value to a potential partner. He points out that while women often mention their intelligence and education, these qualities may not necessarily add value to a man's life if he already has access to such support through professionals. The discussion evolves into the realization that for a high-value man, a woman must provide something he doesn't already have, such as consistent fantastic sex, child rearing, or obedient agreeableness that improves his quality of life.
🍲 The Misunderstood Value of Cooking and Cleaning
Dr. Orion Taban delves into the common resistance women have towards activities like cooking and cleaning, which they perceive as low-value labor. He challenges this notion by comparing these tasks to the high-quality service provided by a Michelin star restaurant, where even simple tasks are done with excellence and enthusiasm. He argues that these activities can be opportunities for intimate integration into a man's lifestyle, rather than servitude. Dr. Taban suggests that modern technology has made these tasks less labor-intensive, and that pride is often the barrier preventing women from recognizing the value they can add through such acts. He encourages women to find ways to contribute that align with their values and comfort levels, and to consider the benefits of providing obedient agreeableness to improve a man's quality of life as a means of securing a desirable relationship.
🎧 Closing Thoughts and Invitation for Feedback
Dr. Orion Taban concludes the discussion by inviting listeners to share their thoughts and experiences related to the topics discussed. He encourages viewers to like the episode and subscribe to the channel for more content. Additionally, he offers the opportunity for viewers to become channel members with perks such as priority review of comments or booking a paid one-on-one consultation, reiterating his commitment to helping women understand and navigate the complexities of relationships and self-worth.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡High Value Woman
💡Perspective
💡Role Play
💡Value Proposition
💡Child Rearing
💡Obedient Agreeableness
💡Quality of Life
💡Pride
💡Michelin Star Restaurant
💡Dark Horse
💡Pride as Women's Greatest Enemy
Highlights
Dr. Orion taban discusses the 'Trap of the High Value Woman' in his talk.
The importance of understanding a man's perspective in forming relationships is emphasized, drawing a parallel to marketing strategies.
Women in their 30s seeking help for starting a family are a common client group.
A role-play scenario is used to illustrate the expectations and negotiations between men and women in relationships.
Men with high value expect something in return that they don't already have in their lives.
Three things a woman can provide to a high-value man are identified: consistent fantastic sex, children and child-rearing, and obedient agreeableness.
Despite the availability of services, there's a stigma attached to men purchasing sex, childcare, and domestic support.
The concept of 'obedient agreeableness' is explained as actions that improve a man's quality of life, such as cooking and cleaning.
Resistance to performing tasks like cooking and cleaning is seen as an issue of pride and ego.
The idea of high-end service is used to compare the value of domestic tasks in a relationship.
Modern technology has made household chores less time-consuming, challenging the notion of them being low-value labor.
Dr. Orion taban suggests that pride is the biggest enemy of women in relationships.
For women seeking a more successful partner, providing value that the man finds valuable is crucial.
Finding ways to contribute to a relationship that suit a woman's individual circumstances is recommended.
The talk concludes with an invitation for listeners to share their thoughts and engage with the content.
Transcripts
I'm Dr Orion taban and this is psyx
Better Living Through psychology and the
topic of today's short talk is the Trap
of the high value woman so I'm very
happy to report that I've been doing a
lot of consultations with women these
days I love doing consultations with
women because I love helping women see
things from a man's perspective this is
important because just like in marketing
you kind of have to see things from the
perspective of your potential customers
so that you can make a value proposition
that resonates with them insisting that
people should simply buy what you're
selling independent of their own wants
and needs doesn't work so seeing things
from a man's perspective will help women
get the kinds of relationships that they
want from the men they want to have
those relationships with now a certain
issue has come up repeatedly in these
consultations so I thought I'd make an
episode about it because if several
women in the recent past have been
struggling with this issue chances are
very good that many many women are
currently struggling with the same issue
right now and it kind of goes like this
usually these women come to me and they
say Orion I'm in my 30s and I understand
that my time is limited I'm ready to
have a family in the next year or two
and I need your help to make that happen
and I say great let me help you do that
so let do a little role play let's say
that you're you and I'm the guy that you
want to make things happen with okay if
you come to me like this I'm going to
say something like all right I just met
you not too long ago and this is a
little pushy but okay I'm willing to
move things along to fit your timeline
let's say I'm willing to give you a
lifelong commitment and to provide for
you and the children I make a lot of
money a lot more than you do which is
probably part of the reason why you
singled me out so your quality of life
should improve considerably if I take
you on now what will I expect to receive
in
return and this question stumps a lot of
women usually they first come back with
some really highlevel stuff like I'm
intelligent and educated and I would
make a really supportive partner and in
my roleplay I respond okay well that
might be the case but I already have a
lot of support in my life I have a
therapist and a lawyer and a priest and
various professional Consultants each
one is an expert in his or her field and
are specialized in the functions they
serve in my life no offense but I don't
think you're going to give me better
advice than they can in the domains in
which I consult them so that's not
actually something that I need from you
and then the women start to coton on a
bit and they say oh okay well I can give
you children right those people can't do
that and I respond well almost any woman
could give me children are you going to
be a mother are you willing to quit your
job and raise those kids most of the
time the women are frightened by that
Prospect and they reply no I'm not
willing to give up my career or I would
expect you to do your share of the child
care too and so I counter so you're
telling me that you're willing to be a
surrogate and that I'll end up paying
someone else to raise my children so
that you can make a little more money at
your
job sometimes that irritates them and
they respond that they don't think it's
fair that they should do all the child
care and that they're looking for a
50/50 relationship and I reply that's
totally fair but that means that you
should probably be asking someone who
makes around the same as you do that way
you can both invest equally in the
lifestyle that you jointly build that
said you probably and understandably
think what's the point of getting
married if it's not going to
significantly improve my situation which
is why you're talking to me and and not
some other guy and we go back and forth
like this for a while until eventually
we hit on the truth of the matter namely
if I'm a high value guy the kind of guy
that you want to get married to and have
children with the only way that you're
going to get what you want is by
providing something that I don't already
have and the more I have the harder
that's going to be however in general
there are three things that a woman can
provide most straight high value men
they are one consistent fantastic sex
two children and child rearing and three
obedient agreeableness that improves his
quality of life and to be honest men can
actually buy all three of those things
however there's still a lot of stigma in
judgment about buying these three
particular things which actually creates
an opportunity in the marketplace for
women to potentially fill
let's focus on this last item a bit
shall we obedient agreeableness that
improves his quality of life can look
like many things but two of the most
common ways of doing this historically
are cooking and
cleaning oo okay the push back I
typically receive on this point is
considerable and usually something on
along the lines of that is low value
labor Orion I'm not interested in being
someone's maid or some man's mommy the
man I want can afford a maid let him pay
someone else if he wants his house
cleaned and I say fair enough you have
absolutely no moral obligation to cook
or clean for a man however I'd like you
to consider that if a man pays for that
service that is one less way in which he
might need you you can look at these
tasks like oppressive servitude or you
can see them as opportunities to
intimately integrate yourself into the
man's lifestyle remember the most
dangerous man for a woman is the man who
has everything because if he has
everything he doesn't need you for
anything which means that you'll be a
play thing at
best next let's look a little closer at
this judgment you have about cooking and
cleaning being beneath you as being low
value labor let's imagine that we go out
to a Michelin star restaurant for a real
high-end dining experience the dinner
will be quite expensive and it may have
taken us months just to get a
reservation and let's imagine that
during our dinner we call over our
waiter and ask for a glass of water and
he explains oh we don't serve water here
this is a high-end restaurant Resturant
we only serve champagne you can get
water anywhere and I would encourage you
to take your business elsewhere if
that's what you're looking
for yeah how would that go over not well
right what makes a high-end restaurant
is not that it doesn't do what the
average restaurants do but that it does
everything that the average restaurants
do and then some if all the other
restaurants serve water
you can't really get away with not
serving water no restaurant is above the
minimum standard of service the high-end
ones not only go above and beyond the
minimum they also perform the standard
of service with class you want a glass
of water right away they'll put it in a
nice glass with artisanal ice cubes and
a lemon wedge garnish they do low value
stuff with enthusiasm and laity because
it's the service that improves the
quality of the experience which is what
you're paying for at a Michelin star
restaurant do you
understand now let's be honest many of
these activities are greatly facilitated
by modern technology between my
dishwasher laundry machines and robot
vacuums I personally keep a
three-bedroom house clean with maybe two
actual hours of Labor a month a month
with grocery delivery services I can
spend two hours a week preparing all my
breakfasts and lunches and a few more
cooking a few dinners pitching in here
and there is frankly not a very big ask
which is why I argue that this
resistance in women is an ego thing it's
really an issue of Pride and as I've
said pride is women's greatest enemy
it's the number one thing that keeps
them from getting into the relationships
they want with the men they want to have
the with look if you want to split the
housework and child care find your Dark
Horse find a man who has about the same
as you and build something together
however if you're looking for a more
successful man to wife you up and give
you kids on your timeline you have to be
prepared to provide value and this has
to be a value that he finds valuable
because the cat decides what milk is
good and all things being equal
providing obedient agreeableness is one
of the easiest and cheapest and safest
ways of doing just that women find ways
of doing this that work for you
something to consider what do you think
does this fit with your own experience
let me know in the comments below and if
you've gotten this far you might as well
like this episode And subscribe to this
channel you may also consider becoming a
channel member with perks like priority
review of comments or booking a paid one
onone consultation as always thank you
for
listening
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