The Art of Decision-Making Without Stress | Kannan Gopinathan | TEDxIIFTDelhi
Summary
TLDRThe speaker, a former IAS officer and a 'resignation aspirant,' shares his journey of self-discovery and service. He emphasizes the importance of aligning actions with one's thoughts to avoid hypocrisy and discusses his experiences teaching underprivileged children, which led to a realization about the need for systemic change. He recounts his time in Mizoram, dealing with the aftermath of insurgency and the importance of institutional checks on government power. The speaker also reflects on his role in the bureaucracy, his work during the Kerala floods, and the significance of patience and preparation in achieving one's goals.
Takeaways
- 😀 The speaker expresses gratitude for the invitation and acknowledges the novelty of a one-sided talk format, contrasting it with his usual interactive engagements.
- 🎓 He prefers to identify as a 'resignation aspirant' rather than a former IAS officer, highlighting his ongoing struggle to leave the service after 4 and a half years.
- 🤔 The speaker emphasizes the importance of authenticity, suggesting that aligning one's actions with personal thoughts is crucial to avoid hypocrisy.
- 👴 Reflecting on aging, he humorously notes the physical changes like graying hair, symbolizing the passage of time and life decisions without fearing consequences.
- 🏆 He underscores the significance of courage and the belief in one's country and institutions, viewing it as a privilege to be guarded for future generations.
- 🏫 The narrative includes a personal journey from studying engineering to realizing a deeper calling, leading to community engagement and teaching underprivileged children.
- 💑 His wife's influence and their shared experiences in social work played a pivotal role in his decision to join the civil service to effect systemic change.
- 🏛️ The speaker's tenure in the civil service was marked by a commitment to empower citizens, learning from his interactions, especially in Mizoram, and dealing with the aftermath of insurgency.
- 🌊 He shares his experiences during the Kerala floods, highlighting the importance of individual contributions and the challenges of bureaucratic processes.
- ⚖️ The speaker discusses the implications of the abrogation of Article 370 in Kashmir, expressing concern over the government's actions and the erosion of citizens' rights.
- 🔄 He concludes with a story about patience, emphasizing the importance of persistent preparation without being preoccupied with immediate results.
Q & A
Why did the speaker feel the need to transition from the private sector to the public sector?
-The speaker felt the need to transition because they realized that they could not effectively bring about change and address the needs they saw in society from outside the system. They believed that to truly make a difference, one must be part of the system.
What was the turning point for the speaker that led to their decision to join the civil service?
-The turning point was when the speaker and their wife started teaching underprivileged children and realized the limitations of their impact outside the system. This, coupled with their wife's decision to join the civil service, motivated the speaker to join a coaching institute, which eventually led to their entry into the IAS.
How did the speaker's experience with teaching children in the NOA sector influence their perspective on education?
-The experience highlighted the challenges of providing consistent education to children in underprivileged areas and the need for systemic change. It also underscored the importance of daily engagement in education and the limitations of sporadic teaching efforts.
What was the speaker's reaction to the children's质疑 of their integrity during their teaching initiative?
-The speaker felt hurt and questioned their self-worth and the value of their efforts. This led to a deeper introspection about the balance between personal ego and public service, ultimately reinforcing their commitment to serving others over personal pride.
How did the speaker's experience in Mizoram shape their understanding of bureaucracy and governance?
-The speaker's experience in Mizoram, particularly dealing with the aftermath of insurgency and the process of compensating affected citizens, reinforced their belief in the importance of upholding citizens' rights and the role of bureaucracy in empowering people.
What was the speaker's stance on the abrogation of Article 370 in Kashmir?
-The speaker was critical of the way Article 370 was abrogated and the subsequent restrictions imposed on the people of Kashmir, viewing it as an infringement on the rights of citizens without proper legal or constitutional backing.
Why did the speaker choose to participate in flood relief efforts in Kerala?
-The speaker felt a personal need to contribute as an individual, beyond their official duties as a civil servant. They wanted to make a direct impact and help those affected by the floods, which led them to take part in relief operations.
What was the speaker's approach to handling the criticism and challenges they faced in their career?
-The speaker chose to prioritize the good of others over their personal ego and self-respect. They believed in maintaining a balance between learning, doing, and sharing, and used introspection to guide their actions and decisions.
What is the significance of the story about boiling water shared by the speaker?
-The story emphasizes the importance of patience and perseverance. It suggests that one should focus on the preparatory work and not be overly concerned with immediate results, as long as they are committed to the process.
How does the speaker define success and fulfillment in their life?
-The speaker defines success and fulfillment as being in a constant state of learning, doing, or sharing. They believe that as long as they are engaged in one of these phases, they feel a sense of purpose and satisfaction.
Outlines
🎤 Personal Reflections and Journey
The speaker begins by expressing gratitude for the invitation to speak, noting that they have been away from public speaking for some time. They reflect on their current status as a 'resignation aspirant,' having left the IAS but still awaiting formal acceptance of their resignation. The speaker emphasizes the importance of authenticity and aligning one's actions with their thoughts, highlighting the hypocrisy that can arise from a disconnect between the two. They recount their journey, starting from a typical academic path to realizing a desire to do more, leading to teaching underprivileged children. The narrative includes meeting their spouse during this phase and the decision to join the IAS to effect systemic change. The speaker also shares a personal anecdote about aging and the courage to make decisions without fearing consequences, rooted in trust in one's country and institutions.
🤔 The Struggle with Ego and Public Service
In this segment, the speaker recounts a challenging experience where they were questioned by children they were teaching about their motives and the distribution of funds. This incident led to a realization about prioritizing public service over personal ego and self-respect. The speaker discusses their understanding of bureaucracy as a means to empower citizens and shares a poignant story from their time in Mizoram, where they had to address historical injustices. They express a deep belief in the Indian constitution and institutions, and their commitment to public service is tested when they witness the government's overreach and the failure of institutions to check such power. The speaker's disillusionment with the system's inability to protect citizens' rights, especially in the context of Kashmir, prompts them to speak out.
🛠️ Active Citizenship and Learning from Experiences
The speaker shares their involvement in flood relief efforts in Kerala, highlighting the importance of individual contributions beyond their official duties. They reflect on the need to be in a constant state of learning, doing, or sharing, which provides a sense of purpose and fulfillment. The speaker also discusses the controversial issue of Article 370 in Kashmir, expressing concern over the government's actions and the lack of institutional checks. They emphasize the importance of balancing the right to life with the right to liberty, and the government's role in preserving both. The narrative concludes with a story about patience, where a guru teaches a student the value of perseverance and preparation, advising against premature assessments of progress.
🌟 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
In the concluding part, the speaker reiterates the importance of being in a state of learning, doing, or sharing, and how this approach has guided their life. They end with a story that illustrates the value of patience and the wisdom of focusing on the preparatory process rather than constantly checking for immediate results. The speaker thanks the audience for the invitation and for their attention, leaving them with a message of perseverance and trust in one's journey.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Resignation aspirant
💡Hypocrisy
💡Call to action
💡Public service
💡Empowering citizens
💡Institutional check
💡Constitutional backing
💡Right to life vs. right to liberty
💡Learn, do, share
💡Patience
Highlights
The speaker expresses gratitude for the invitation and discusses their current status as a 'resignation aspirant', highlighting the difficulty of leaving their position.
Emphasizes the importance of being true to oneself and one's thoughts, and the hypocrisy that arises from misalignment between thoughts and actions.
Reflects on the aging process and the realization of the consequences of life decisions, especially in the context of believing in one's country and institutions.
Shares the story of teaching underprivileged children and the challenges faced in ensuring their learning progress.
Narrates how the speaker's wife influenced the decision to join the civil service to effect change from within the system.
Describes the experience of teaching and the pivotal moment when children questioned the speaker's integrity, leading to a reevaluation of priorities.
Reveals a personal philosophy where public service should come before personal ego, a principle tested during the speaker's time in civil service.
Explains the concept of bureaucracy as a means to empower citizens and the speaker's commitment to this ideal.
Shares a poignant story from Mizoram about assessing compensation for those affected by anti-insurgency operations, highlighting the human cost of conflict.
Discusses the role of institutions in checking government power and the speaker's disillusionment with the failure of these checks.
Recounts the speaker's involvement in flood relief efforts in Kerala and the personal drive to contribute beyond official duties.
Expresses concern over the situation in Kashmir, particularly the stripping of rights and the lack of legal or constitutional process.
Introduces the concept of living in three phases: learning, doing, and sharing, which the speaker believes helps maintain a meaningful life.
Concludes with a parable about patience, emphasizing the importance of preparation over immediate results.
Ends with a message of gratitude and a wish for the audience's success.
Transcripts
first of all thank you for inviting me I
had not been going out and giving talks
for a while now and uh I'm not very used
to this format uh of being one-sided
coners know talk either it has always
been a call to action to do something or
a conversation uh that is where there is
a two-sided way of
communication to begin with there's an
interesting introduction which it said
is a former IAS
officer but I would
rather describe myself right now as a
resignation
aspirant it has been 4 and a half years
resignation is still not accepted so so
I think it takes around couple of years
to get in but it's been a longer time to
get out uh so that's that's my current
status
and I won't be able to tell you how to
succeed how to be an
achiever how to what to do what not to
do it's very difficult for me because
I'm myself figuring things out all the
while throughout my journey what I have
been conscious about is to be true to
oneself and true to your own
thoughts the hypocrisy between your own
thoughts and your own action is the
worst kind of
hypocrisy your own words and your own
thoughts
your own actions and your own
thoughts I think at least that
part I am trying to be honest to myself
and my thoughts and my
conss mirror mirror actually uh Kanika
was asking that what are you going to
say so I said I also don't know what to
say she said just talk talk about your
journey or what do you see when you see
a mirror of course all that I see aging
hairs you know gray hairs and nothing
more it's slowly increasing
and also a
question that you know you have taken
decisions in your life without worrying
about
consequences and that I think is
Possible only if you
believe in your country in your
institutions of this country and your
own society that courage is not a
courage that is a
privilege and we should be I believe
should be guarding that privilege all
the time not for us but for our future
Generations I started in like in any
normal household study well that's the
only motto right study well get a job
study well get a job studied well did
engineering got a job and then I
realized something was missing uh that's
not the end of what I wanted to be then
we started we saw there are kids who are
uh you know coming to the rack pick
essentially rack Pickers and we started
engaging with them we started teaching
them while we were working in a in a
semiconductor sector in the engineering
sector we started teaching them every
day in fact once in a week and then we
realized after every week we teach
something we are feeling satisfied but
they are not learning anything because
you go back and then you come back there
we are again starting with ABCD so we
are happy of doing something great but
at the same time the result of that was
very minimal so there was this question
can we teach every day without private
work said okay let's do so we started
teaching every day day and that's where
in fact I met my wife now wife of course
then I wanted her to be my wife when we
started that that's in Delhi actually
NOA sector 15 16 that area and then we
moved to ATA Market there we see a lot
of kids come and say that you know so we
started teaching there and when we
started teaching out there that's when
it realized or dawned on her that maybe
we are trying to do too many things by
being outside the system let us get into
the system right if you want to change
things you should get into the system so
she joined a C Service Institute and I
thought like we had just got
married and if she's now going to a
coaching Institute like where do we get
to spend our time together I thought
okay maybe I'll also join coaching
Institute at least dating can continue
inside the coaching
Institute so I said that to her and I
joined and uh the funny thing is I took
study seriously and she took dating
seriously and so I landed up in
I and she said one of us has to be in
the private sector the more wisest
decision ever for our family right one
of us has to be in the outside the
government so she remained outside the
government I end ended up in the is but
one thing I learned during that uh small
teaching period there we we teaching
small
kids and of course we putting from our
side some 500 bucks every month getting
the books everything and going there
once these five five kids were there
they stood up and asked so you must be
getting a lot of money you coming from
this NGO right you must be getting a lot
of money but you are not giving anything
to us you're just coming here and
teaching and going so tell us the truth
where is the money going there small
kids very small kids I got hurt I said
like you are I'm putting my effort I'm
putting money I'm doing everything for
them and then they are asking
questioning my Integrity how can that
happen so I called up himani my
wife and I told her that I stop this I
can't do this anymore this is not
my I I don't want to be like Fel feeling
bad after this then she asked like why
did you go there in the first place so I
said because I think there is a need to
teach there is a need for education to
be imparted there then the second
question was do you think that need has
changed so I said no then why are you
saying you're
stopping and I said maybe because I'm
hurt so at that point I realized I kept
my ego or my
self-respect above the public service
the service aspect of it that as long as
my ego was being satisfied the service
aspect was fine but if the service is
kind of hurting my ego I can't do it and
then I framed a thing because for me my
ego and my self PR is very important but
I said okay my personal benefit comes
here next comes the ego and the self
resect part and then comes the Public
Service part so if there is any time a
question between service for others
right anything that can good can happen
to others and your own ego I told myself
that I should choose this good of the
others not my ego but if it is your own
good if somebody ask okay come and maybe
sit here for 5 minutes and you'll get
good things then I would always choose
my self-respect on my ego so this
Clarity I got during that period then of
course I was there here in Delhi for
some time then in missam and for me it
was
clear bureaucracy or government meant
only one
thing that is to empower or enhance the
freedoms and the rights of the citizens
nothing
else if each person in
India gets his or her due position as a
citizen I'm 100% sure India will get its
position in the world state St if each
citizen gets his or her position in this
country proper equal citizen so that
part was clear that this is what I want
to do if at all anything that I want to
be contribution in part of the system
this is what I would like to be and this
was during the UPS interview also these
are my answers and especially when I
went to muram so I learned a little bit
of Miz there are a lot of stories from
misam but one thing that I don't know
many of you may know or may not know is
that we had a long Insurgency period in
misso
and we have bombed we have had brutal
incidents of anti-insurgency operations
in Missour one of the tasks there as a
collector was that you go and assess uh
what was the area that Army occupied
during that period and you pay
compensation to those uh the people who
are there whose land was to occupied
none of them had papers because most of
the villages were burned and uh
repopulated or re settled on along the
highways right many of us may not know
the story because it is not covered then
at this point of time we are going and
I'm talking to people so there was one
one lady who came up and said you know
like she showed some part of a body and
said is there any compensation that I
can get and that is not a that was not a
rhetorical or a question that is a very
honest question that can we at least get
some money for what happened to me
because she she didn't own any
land so I told out of my navity or out
of my confidence in my own country my
own constittution tion my own uh
institutions that this happened in the
80s or '
70s this will not happen this blatant
violation of
Rights will not happen in the India of
2000s and 2010s and 20s I had that
confidence I believed in it and that is
why you chose to be part of the system
right you will be enable to empower and
enhance and then I realized why the rest
of the country doesn't know about it
because the
institutions did not respond to the
actions of the government governments
generally have have an overarching
tendency now to accumulate more and more
power every government any place any
time how is it checked it's checked
through various other institutions that
are put in
place when those institutions fail then
only one thing remains that greed and
thirst for more and more power from the
government
to control every aspects of the life and
it is very natural tendency it's not a
bad or good tendency it's a very natural
tendency so of course mam we did a lot
of things we could you know n number of
things one of the things that you
mentioned that I went uh to Kerala and
uh did the flood relief part that was
when I was in dadra nagari we were doing
coordinating a lot of relief operations
it was an industrial areas we were able
to put a lot of medicines everything but
then I also felt I need to do something
by myself you know as an indiv indidual
not as a collector but as an individual
can I contribute in some way and since
you come from a background where you
have contributed in many ways as an as
an NGO Etc so I said okay let me go and
do it the funny thing is one of the
enquiry that is going on right now is
that I did not submit the two report for
the flood relief work that I did in 2018
fledge when what happened there are two
people here I think today who had lot of
things to add on to especially when it
comes to Kashmir what happened for me it
was not about 370 what exactly was done
with 370 no for me that what happened
afterwards or how it was
implemented that was an explicit
statement that state or the government
can take away the rights of the people
without any legal or constitutional
backing that a state can be made to put
like you know no communication no
Transportation no uh internet none of
that and and people be asked to choose
between do you have do you want the
right to life or do you want the right
to Liberty you choose between one of
them because it cannot coexist but it
always
coexists right to life is nothing
without right to
Liberty so we kind of said that this
point you have to choose and we chose
for you this is what it is and that's
okay that's governments have always had
the tendency to do it but then there are
institutions who always try to put a
check on it and when I felt
that that institutional check did not
happen one after the other then I felt
something needs to be spoken right so I
have uh tried to put my life in a very
different way that I should either be in
one of the three
phases either it should be in a learn
phase that you're learning something or
a do phase that you're doing something
or share phase you're sharing something
as long as you're in one of these phases
I don't feel bad about myself but when
I'm not in any of this like I'm not
either learning anything I'm not doing
anything and I'm not sharing anything if
I'm not in any of these faes then I feel
very uncomfortable then I feel that
mirror question comes the introspection
question comes okay what am I doing with
my life right and I always try to put it
in the learn do and share phases of my
life and I believe that is help me in
good stad I end my talk with a one small
story it's about patience and nothing
else there is a young graduate you can
say and he studied he passed out a lot
of Dreams tremendous amount of
dreams but nothing is happening for him
nothing is working out right then he
goes to a guru and tells the guru like
guruji I don't know what to do with my
life nothing is going nothing is
happening I have lot of
Dreams so Guru says okay before I answer
the question can you go and boil a glass
of water and give it to me from the
kitchen he goes he goes and sees that
there's a huge tumbler a huge tumbler
and it's full of water and it's a small
Tula very small one and there are no
firewood wood sticks there so he goes to
collect a few comes back starts to burn
but by the time it starts it's almost
the wood firewoods are over he'll have
to go back then he decides to spend four
to 5 hours in just collecting the
firewood from the neighboring Forest
comes
back then he boils the water the whole
tumbler after that he gives a boiled one
glass of boiled water to the guru so he
said Guru said I asked you for one glass
of boiled water how did it take you so
much
time so the student says I had two
options either I throw away the rest of
the water and only keep one glass I
could have given you
immediately or I collect enough firewood
so that I can boil the entire water and
give one glass of it from you I chose
the second
one so then the guru
says you did you get your
answer so he said yes I
did but remember one thing the guru adds
when you are collecting your firewood
don't keep checking the temperature of
the water when you are preparing for
something don't start looking at whether
the results have started coming or not
as long as you are doing the preparation
part as long as you collecting the
firewood don't worry about whether water
is heating or not and I wish you all the
very best uh thank you once again for
inviting me thank you
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