The mindset that's changing my life

Summary

The video script explores the concept of 'locus of control,' highlighting the difference between those who believe they control their destiny versus those who feel at the mercy of external forces. It emphasizes the importance of developing an internal locus of control for personal success, especially during challenging times like the pandemic. The speaker encourages viewers to take responsibility for their life outcomes and suggests that adopting this mindset is crucial for making substantial changes and personal growth.

Takeaways

• 🌟 Success often correlates with an internal locus of control, where individuals believe they have control over their life's outcomes rather than external forces.
• 🧠 The concept of locus of control is the degree to which people believe they can influence the events in their lives, as opposed to external forces.
• 👶 Children typically have an external locus of control due to their dependence on adults for survival and the limited control they have over their environment.
• 🛠 As we grow up, ideally, we should learn to take responsibility and develop an internal locus of control, enabling us to navigate life independently.
• 🔄 However, some individuals carry the helplessness of childhood into adulthood, remaining dependent on external systems for their needs and blaming them for their life's problems.
• 💡 It's important not to solely blame external forces for life's issues but to take responsibility for our actions and how we respond to our circumstances.
• 🌪 The global pandemic has highlighted the feeling of helplessness and the temptation to externalize blame, but it's crucial to recognize what we can control within our situation.
• 💪 Adopting an internal locus of control is empowering, as it shifts the perception of life from happening to you, to life happening because of you.
• 🚀 Having an internal locus of control is a prerequisite for making substantial changes in life, emphasizing the impact of positive actions and personal efforts.
• 🎹 The speaker's personal anecdote about buying a piano to improve jazz improvisation skills illustrates the principle of taking control of one's learning and development.
• 📚 Skillshare is presented as a resource for learning and self-improvement, offering practical classes that can be applied to real-life situations.

Q & A

What is the main theme of the video script discussing?

The main theme of the video script is the concept of locus of control and how it affects a person's success and outlook on life.

What are the two types of people mentioned in the script, and how do they differ?

The two types of people mentioned are those who are inspiring and have their life figured out, and those who are stuck and unable to recognize opportunities. The difference lies in their locus of control: the former has an internal locus of control, while the latter has an external one.

What is the locus of control and why is it significant in determining success in life?

Locus of control is the degree to which people believe they have control over the outcomes of events in their lives as opposed to external forces. It is significant because it influences how individuals approach challenges and opportunities, affecting their success.

How does the script describe the development of an external locus of control in children?

The script describes the development of an external locus of control in children as a natural outcome of their dependence on parental figures for survival, which leads to a belief that external forces control the outcomes in their lives.

What is the role of a competent parental figure in transitioning a child from an external to an internal locus of control?

A competent parental figure teaches the child the necessary skills to survive and thrive independently, gradually phasing themselves out so that the child can develop an internal locus of control as they grow into adulthood.

Why is it problematic for adults to maintain an external locus of control from childhood?

Maintaining an external locus of control in adulthood is problematic because it can lead to a sense of helplessness and dependency on external systems, preventing individuals from taking responsibility for their own lives and making necessary changes.

How does the script suggest dealing with external factors that seem to control one's life?

The script suggests that instead of blaming external factors, individuals should take full responsibility for their situation and look for ways to improve their lives within the given circumstances.

What impact did the global pandemic have on the speaker's perspective on locus of control?

The global pandemic made the speaker feel a sense of helplessness and an external locus of control, but they later realized that they could still take actions to improve their life despite the situation.

What is the importance of adopting an internal locus of control according to the script?

Adopting an internal locus of control is important because it empowers individuals to feel that they are in control of their lives, making it more likely for them to take positive actions and make substantial changes.

How does the script relate the concept of locus of control to the idea of personal responsibility?

The script relates locus of control to personal responsibility by stating that having an internal locus of control means recognizing that it is one's own responsibility to improve their life and not relying on external forces.

What is the role of Skillshare in the script, and how does it relate to the theme of self-improvement?

Skillshare is mentioned as a sponsor and as a platform for online learning that provides classes on various topics, which can be used for self-improvement and aligns with the script's theme of taking control of one's life through personal development.

Outlines

00:00

🧠 Internal vs. External Locus of Control

The speaker discusses the concept of locus of control, distinguishing between internal and external types. They suggest that successful individuals often have an internal locus of control, believing they can influence their life outcomes, while less successful people tend to have an external locus of control, attributing their fate to external forces. The paragraph explores how early childhood development influences this belief system, with children naturally having an external locus of control due to their dependence on adults. It emphasizes the importance of transitioning to an internal locus of control as one matures, to avoid remaining dependent on external systems for survival and success. The speaker also touches on the challenges of recognizing and overcoming a persistent external locus of control, especially in the face of societal and occupational dissatisfaction.

05:01

🌪️ Navigating Life's Challenges with Internal Locus of Control

This paragraph delves into the speaker's personal experience during the 2020 global pandemic, highlighting a resurgence of helplessness similar to that felt in childhood. The speaker contrasts this with the realization that one can still take control and improve their situation despite adverse circumstances. They stress the importance of personal responsibility in shaping one's life, arguing against a victim mentality that blames external forces for life's difficulties. The speaker encourages adopting an internal locus of control as a means of empowerment, suggesting that it is essential for making substantial changes in life. They emphasize that individual actions do have an impact and that one's efforts are crucial in overcoming challenges. The paragraph concludes with a light-hearted mention of Skillshare as a sponsor, and the speaker's personal use of the platform to learn and improve, symbolizing the proactive approach to personal development.

Keywords

💡Inspiring

The term 'inspiring' refers to the quality of evoking interest, enthusiasm, or admiration in others. In the context of the video, it is used to describe individuals who have a profound impact on others by appearing to have a clear direction in life and the ability to shape their own destiny. An example from the script is the mention of people who 'seem to have their life figured out' and are 'determined,' which exemplifies the inspiring nature of such individuals.

💡Destiny

Destiny is the predetermined course of events or the ultimate outcome of one's life. The video discusses the idea that some people are perceived as being able to 'carve out their own destiny,' suggesting that they have the power to influence their life's direction actively. This concept is central to the video's theme of personal empowerment and the locus of control.

💡Negativity

Negativity, in this context, is a state of mind characterized by a focus on negative aspects or a pessimistic outlook on life. The script contrasts inspiring individuals with those who 'harbor a lot of negativity towards life,' implying that a negative mindset can hinder one's ability to recognize and seize opportunities.

💡Opportunities

Opportunities are chances or situations in which something can be done or a goal can be achieved. The video script mentions that some people are 'unable to recognize the opportunities in front of them,' which is tied to the idea that an external locus of control can limit one's ability to perceive and act on available chances.

💡Locus of Control

Locus of control is a psychological concept that refers to the degree to which people believe they have control over the outcome of events in their lives, as opposed to external forces. The video emphasizes the importance of having an 'internal locus of control' for success, as it is associated with the belief that one can influence their life's direction and outcomes.

💡Internal Locus of Control

An internal locus of control is the belief that one's life outcomes are primarily a result of their own actions and decisions. The video script suggests that successful people often have this trait, as they believe they can influence their life's events, rather than being at the mercy of external forces.

💡External Locus of Control

An external locus of control is the belief that one's life is controlled by external factors beyond their influence. The video contrasts this with an internal locus of control, noting that less successful people may have an external one, leading them to feel helpless and unable to change their circumstances.

💡Childhood Development

Childhood development refers to the physical, cognitive, and social growth that occurs during childhood. The script discusses how the locus of control can be shaped during this period, with young children naturally having an external locus of control due to their dependency on caregivers for survival.

💡Dependency

Dependency is the state of relying on or being controlled by someone or something else. In the video, it is mentioned that children are 'entirely dependent on a parental figure' and that some adults carry this dependency into adulthood, which can hinder their ability to take control of their lives.

💡Pandemic

A pandemic is an outbreak of a disease that occurs over a wide geographic area and affects an exceptionally high proportion of the population. The video uses the 2020 global pandemic as an example of a situation that can lead to feelings of helplessness and an external locus of control, but also as a context where adopting an internal locus of control can be particularly empowering.

💡Skillshare

Skillshare is an online learning community platform offering thousands of classes on various topics. In the script, it is mentioned as a sponsor of the video and as a resource the speaker uses for learning jazz improvisation on the piano, illustrating the platform's practical application in personal development.

Highlights

The concept of inspiration and how it differs from being stuck in life.

The idea that one single belief may not be enough to define success or failure in life.

The importance of recognizing that everyone's life is unique and shaped by various factors.

The introduction of the 'locus of control' as a key trait distinguishing successful from less successful people.

Defining 'locus of control' and its impact on how individuals perceive their control over life events.

The development of locus of control from childhood to adulthood and its potential to change.

How children naturally have an external locus of control due to their dependency.

The role of parenting in transitioning from an external to an internal locus of control.

The potential for adults to carry childhood helplessness into their adult lives.

Examples of how an external locus of control can manifest in dissatisfaction with jobs or reliance on systems.

The importance of taking responsibility for one's own life outcomes rather than blaming external forces.

The challenge of maintaining an internal locus of control during the global pandemic.

The personal realization that one can still improve their life despite external circumstances.

The empowerment that comes from adopting an internal locus of control and the impact on life perception.

The necessity of internal locus of control for making substantial changes in one's life.

The message that individual efforts do have an impact and are essential for life changes.

An introduction to Skillshare as a platform for learning and personal development.

A personal anecdote about buying a piano and using Skillshare to improve jazz improvisation skills.

Details about Skillshare's offerings, pricing, and the benefits of its practical, real-life classes.

A special offer for Skillshare premium membership for the first thousand viewers.

A humorous call to action for viewers to like, subscribe, and consider the impact of notifications on their lives.

Transcripts

- I feel like everybody at some point

in their life has met somebody who was truly inspiring.

They seem to have their life figured out.

They are determined.

They can carve out their own destiny.

They create their own luck.

And on the flip side, a lot of us have met people who seem

to just bury themselves in a hole

and are unable to get out of it.

They are unable to recognize the opportunities

in front of them,

they harbor a lot of negativity towards life

and they seem perpetually stuck.

Helpless against seemingly endless negative external forces.

And I feel like a lot of people talk about these two types

of people and try to distill one single belief

or concept that separates the two of them.

And if you just adopt this belief

then you'll be like the successful person

and not like the unsuccessful person.

But I feel like it's a little foolish to do so

because everybody's life is so well wildly different.

People had different upbringings.

People have such different instilled beliefs

about the world or religion or whatever.

It's hard to just say that one single belief

will change someone's life for the better for eternity

and they'll never experience hardship again.

But I have noticed one trait that successful people seem

to share more often than unsuccessful people.

And I can't help but think that there

is a strong correlation between having that belief

and having success in life.

And that is that successful people tend to have

an internal locus of control.

And less successful people tend to have an external one.

So what is locus of control?

Locus of control is the degree

to which people believe that they,

as opposed to external forces,

have control over the outcome of events in their lives.

So, you watching this right now either have

an external locus of control

or an internal locus of control.

And I think the severity of either of these extremes

was formed through your childhood and your development

and your transition into adulthood.

Because children, very young children especially,

have an extra internal locus of control.

External forces have control over the outcomes

of events in their lives.

When you're a kid,

you're pretty much absolutely helpless,

especially when you're a very young kid.

You can't really feed yourself, or clothe yourself.

You're so dependent on a parental figure to provide you

with all of your needs that you basically have no choice

but to develop a very external locus of control.

The situations of your life are entirely out of your control

and you're entirely dependent on some sort of third party

to provide you with what you need to survive.

And there's nothing wrong with that,

like, kids don't really have a choice

in the matter, that is their world.

That's a factual and realistic belief to have as a kid.

But hopefully you had a competent parental figure

or a leader as you're growing up

that kind of taught you the ropes, how to, how to clean,

how to make money, how to fend for yourself in the world.

I've always thought that if a parent does their job right,

they basically phase themselves out.

Hopefully by the time you're an adult,

you still want your parents around,

but you don't need them around.

If they were to die, you'd be okay.

Like you could fend for yourself.

You can figure stuff out.

But unfortunately for a lot of us,

we bring a lot of the helplessness

of childhood into adulthood.

We never shake the idea that we need

to be provided for somehow.

We remain dependent on some sort of external system

to provide us with the necessary materials

to survive and thrive.

And a lot of the time this is really hard to spot.

From an occupational standpoint,

sometimes this can look like being unsatisfied with your job

and you're working so hard but getting paid so little.

So you externalize the struggle onto your boss

or your provider and you blame him for your life's problems.

My life sucks because my boss doesn't see how much I'm worth

and he's not paying me enough money.

Or you might look at the government and say,

the government is not giving me the proper tax breaks

that I need in my societal class

and it's making it really hard for me.

And the tricky thing is that a lot of the time,

these are valid complaints.

There's a certain amount of logic to them.

But the default shouldn't be to place all of the blame

and place all of the responsibility for changing the outcome

of your life onto these external forces,

otherwise we will just be imprisoned

by them for our entire lives.

Our default should be to look at the cards that we are given

and take full responsibility for how we play those cards.

I feel like having this internal locus of control

it's extremely important in today's day and age

because obviously in 2020

we were just hit with a global pandemic

and so much of that felt so far out of our control

that it was very tempting.

I know for me personally it was to develop a feeling

of helplessness almost,

that childlike helplessness started to blossom again.

And I felt like I had to put my entire life on hold,

put all my habits on hold

until this whole pandemic blew over.

Sometime halfway through I realized

that I can work within this system.

There are things that I can do to improve

my life despite the crappy situation.

And it is my sole responsibility to figure out how

to thrive within the environment that I've been placed.

It's nobody's responsibility to come be your night

and shining armor and fight the dragons in your life.

It's only your responsibility.

And I don't want this to come across like I'm scolding you,

like, the father you never had.

No, I'm just kidding.

But hopefully to empower you.

Once you start adopting more of

an internal locus of control,

it'll start to feel a lot less like life is happening to you

but it will start to feel a lot more like life

is happening due to you.

And that's a very empowering belief to have.

In fact, I would say it's a prerequisite

to making any sort of substantial change in your life.

Your positive actions to work your way out of

a bad situation, do have an impact.

Your efforts are not in vain.

Because not only do you have the power to change your life,

you're the only one who does.

Videos like these are made possible.

Thanks to amazing sponsors like Skillshare.

I actually recently just bought a kind of expensive piano

and I did this so that I would have no excuse not

to get better at jazz improv.

Probably not the best use of my money,

but I couldn't resist.

Unfortunately, due to the pandemic it's really hard

to find in-person classes right now.

Thankfully Skillshare is kind of the next best thing.

And Charles Cornell, a YouTuber that you guys might know,

has an amazing improvisational piano class on Skillshare.

So I'm diving headfirst into that and I'm learning

a lot of new things and I get to use that piano,

and it's just a win-win.

For those of you who don't know,

Skillshare is an online learning community

with thousands of classes, covering dozens of topics.

Everything from music lessons, to photography

and videography, to the culinary arts and productivity.

No matter what you're into or what you want to learn,

Skillshare probably has a class for it.

And chances are, it's also very practical

because all the classes

on Skillshare are designed for real life.

It's super easy to take whatever you're learning

on Skillshare and apply it directly

to your real life pursuits.

Not only is it such a useful tool,

but it's also extremely affordable.

If you get the annual membership,

it comes in at less than $10 a month.

So it's kind of a no brainer.

And the first a thousand of you who clicked the link

in the description below, will get a free trial

of a Skillshare premium membership.

So in like less than two minutes,

you can be diving into your first class on Skillshare using

the amazing offer down below.

Learn something new, explore your creativity,

and as usual, have a great time.

Oh, Hey, if you liked this video,

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Shoves my bald head into other people's homepages,

helping them out.

And it also helps me out.

So it's kind of a win-win for everybody.

If you're lurking here and this is the thousandth time

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Just like, hit the bell icon

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but, hell get off the notification train,

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If you hit the bell icon and hit it, that's a bold move,

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Anyways, I'm not going crazy.

You're going crazy.

Catch you the next video.

It's going to be really,

really quick within the next few days, actually.

And it's gonna feature a special guest

that you guys all already know.

You all know him and he'll be in the video.

So, see ya.