How To Be More Confident Talking To Girls | If You Get Awkward Talking To Girls Watch This
Summary
TLDRIn this video, Justin J offers practical advice on boosting confidence when talking to women. He emphasizes that confidence stems from a mindset shift, viewing women as equals rather than special beings. His tips include treating women as human beings, using light teasing to convey ease, asking 'why' to stimulate conversation, sharing experiences, and being straightforward. Justin also advises against comparing oneself to others and stresses the importance of simple gestures like a hello and maintaining eye contact to build rapport and self-assurance.
Takeaways
- π Confidence is key: The script emphasizes that confidence and a positive mindset are more important than specific things to say when talking to women.
- π₯ Women are human too: It suggests that viewing women as regular human beings, rather than 'special' or superior, can help reduce nervousness and increase natural interaction.
- π€ Challenge with 'why': Asking 'why' questions can stimulate deeper conversation and show genuine interest, making the interaction more engaging.
- π Teasing creates attraction: Light teasing can show a woman that you're not overly serious and can create a fun, relaxed atmosphere.
- π Share stories: Sharing personal experiences and stories can build rapport and make conversations more interesting and personal.
- π ββοΈ Don't focus on the outcome: Approaching women without being overly concerned about the outcome can lead to more authentic interactions.
- π¬ Be direct: Honesty about your intentions, whether casual or serious, can prevent misunderstandings and show confidence.
- π Simple greetings matter: A simple 'hello' can go a long way in establishing a positive first impression and gauging a woman's receptiveness.
- π Eye contact is crucial: Maintaining eye contact during a conversation can convey confidence and interest.
- π€ Stop comparing: Avoid comparing oneself to other men as it undermines self-confidence; instead, focus on personal growth and authenticity.
- π« No need to chase: Rejection is a part of the process and should not be seen as a personal failure; it can actually build resilience and confidence.
Q & A
What is the main focus of Justin J's video on confidence when talking to girls?
-The main focus of Justin J's video is to address the mindset and confidence issues that men face when talking to women, emphasizing that it's not about what you say but how you say it.
Why does Justin J suggest that women are not special in the context of approaching them?
-Justin J suggests that women are not special to break the notion that they are on a higher pedestal, which can cause men to feel nervous or inferior. This mindset is meant to boost men's confidence in social interactions.
How does Justin J define the importance of confidence in the way one talks to women?
-Justin J defines confidence as crucial because it affects how one communicates. A woman's interest is not solely based on the content of the conversation but on the level of confidence with which it is delivered.
What is the significance of viewing women as human beings in Justin J's advice?
-Viewing women as human beings helps to normalize interactions and reduce the pressure that comes from idealizing them. This perspective encourages men to approach women without fear or the need to impress.
Why does Justin J emphasize the importance of not being outcome-dependent when talking to women?
-Justin J emphasizes not being outcome-dependent to avoid putting unnecessary pressure on the conversation. It allows for a more natural and relaxed interaction, which is more attractive to women.
How does teasing play a role in Justin J's approach to building confidence with women?
-Teasing is presented as a way to show that you're not afraid to ruffle feathers and to display a fun, light-hearted side. It helps to break the ice and shows women that you're not overly serious or desperate.
What is the purpose of asking 'why' when conversing with women according to Justin J?
-Asking 'why' serves to challenge women and make them think, which can lead to deeper and more engaging conversations. It also gives them the opportunity to explain their viewpoints, keeping the dialogue flowing.
How does sharing experiences and telling stories contribute to the conversation with women as per Justin J?
-Sharing experiences and telling stories helps to create a bond and provides a platform for mutual understanding. It allows both parties to connect on a personal level and can make the interaction more memorable.
What does Justin J mean by 'stop thinking of the outcome of any type of approach'?
-Justin J advises not to focus on the potential outcomes of approaching women, such as rejection or acceptance. Instead, he encourages men to focus on the interaction itself and to be confident in their approach.
Why is being straightforward with women about your intentions considered a sign of confidence by Justin J?
-Being straightforward shows that you are secure in what you want and are not trying to deceive or manipulate the situation. It demonstrates respect for the woman's feelings and time, which can be attractive.
How does Justin J address the issue of comparing oneself to other men in the context of dating?
-Justin J advises against comparing oneself to other men, as it undermines self-confidence. He suggests learning from others' successes but emphasizes the importance of developing one's own unique approach and style.
What is the role of a simple 'hello' in building confidence when interacting with women, according to Justin J?
-A simple 'hello' serves as a basic but effective way to gauge a woman's receptiveness and to build confidence. It's a low-stakes interaction that can provide immediate feedback and help in assessing social dynamics.
Why does holding eye contact matter when talking to women, as suggested by Justin J?
-Holding eye contact is key because it conveys confidence and sincerity. It can also be an indicator of attraction and interest, and it helps to establish a stronger connection during the conversation.
Outlines
π£οΈ Building Confidence When Talking to Women
Justin J emphasizes that the key to confidence when talking to women is mindset. It's not about having the perfect thing to say but about how you say it. Confidence and how you view women play crucial roles. Women are human beings and shouldn't be placed on a pedestal. Men should focus on improving their confidence and understanding that women's attraction often comes from the confidence displayed rather than specific words or actions.
π Teasing Women to Build Rapport
Teasing women in a light-hearted manner can show that you're not afraid to ruffle feathers and can lead to more engaging conversations. It's important not to take things too seriously and to be playful. Teasing can break the ice and help build attraction. Sharing jokes and not being overly serious can make women feel more comfortable and view you as a fun and confident person.
π¬ Engaging in Meaningful Conversations
Asking 'why' questions can keep the conversation flowing and show genuine interest. Women enjoy talking, especially when they feel the conversation is engaging. Sharing personal stories and experiences can also make conversations more lively and help build a connection. Being a good storyteller and showing a willingness to share can enhance your attractiveness and make interactions more memorable.
π Overcoming Fear of Rejection
Rejection is a natural part of the process and can actually build confidence. Men often fear public rejection, thinking everyone is watching, but in reality, most people are not paying attention. Viewing rejection as a learning experience and understanding that it happens to everyone can help overcome this fear. Being direct and honest about your intentions with women shows confidence and can be more effective than trying to manipulate the situation.
πͺ Embracing Individuality and Simplicity
Stop comparing yourself to other men and focus on your unique qualities. Simple gestures like saying hello can go a long way in building confidence. Holding eye contact can also convey confidence and make a strong impression. Women often respond positively to confident behavior, and practicing these small actions can help build your overall confidence.
Mindmap
Keywords
π‘Confidence
π‘Mindset
π‘Teasing
π‘Attraction
π‘Outcome Dependent
π‘Storytelling
π‘Rejection
π‘Eye Contact
π‘Comparison
π‘Approach
Highlights
The importance of confidence in communication with women, emphasizing it's a mindset rather than what is being said.
Understanding that women are human beings too and viewing them as such can reduce nervousness and increase confidence.
The idea that confidence comes from within and is not dependent on external validation from women.
Teasing as a way to show confidence and create a relaxed, fun atmosphere in conversations with women.
The effectiveness of asking 'why' to engage women in deeper conversation and to understand their thought processes.
Sharing experiences and stories as a method to connect and keep the conversation flowing naturally.
The misconception that people are always watching and the importance of not being outcome-dependent in social interactions.
Being straightforward with women about intentions and desires can demonstrate confidence and sincerity.
Avoiding comparisons with other men to build and maintain self-confidence.
The power of a simple 'hello' in creating positive interactions and building confidence.
Holding eye contact as a non-verbal cue of confidence and attraction.
The impact of body language and presentation on how women perceive and react to men.
The notion that rejection is not a negative but a confidence-building experience.
The importance of not taking things too seriously and maintaining a light-hearted approach in interactions.
The idea that confidence is not about looks, money, or status, but about actions and behaviors.
The video's conclusion emphasizing the key points discussed for building confidence in talking to women.
Transcripts
what's good guys it's your boy Justin J
coming to you with another car video
Let's cook boys let's cook all right
this is how to be more confident talking
to girls if you get awkward around girls
you definitely need to watch this
because it's more of a mindset thing a
lot of guys are always wondering well
how can I you know not run out of things
to say or how can I say the perfect
thing to get her to like me but
realistically it's all about your
confidence and it's a mindset thing a
lot of these talking points that I've
written down to go over in the video
have everything to do with you and have
nothing to do with the woman has
everything to do with the way you think
and the way you even see women all right
a lot of guys are thinking in a logical
way about things and trying to
rationalize but realistically
everything's in front of your face so I
want dudes to understand when a woman is
feeling you when she's into you it's not
about what you're saying it's about how
you're saying it you understand and how
you're saying it has everything to do
with your level of confidence when
you're talking to women and when you go
out there and talk to women you're going
to understand like damn everything
Justin says is true because I'm seeing
it in live timing all right so never get
in your head slow down I'm going get
into all these talking points and
hopefully I make everything clear in
this video with that being said let's
get straight into it number one women
are human beings yes we do things
differently we have things about us that
are different but
look at the end of the day we're human
beings we're sexual beings so what I
mean by that is you know that nervous
feeling that you get when you want to go
approach a pretty girl that you like
maybe in your class maybe you saw some
chick out in a in a department store or
in the grocery store or maybe it's a
chick on Instagram and you're thinking
damn She's Out of My League maybe it's a
chick on a dating app and you play it
safe and you only swipe on chicks that
you know will definitely like you but
then you see a pretty chick and you're
like well I'm going just go past her cuz
she's not going to like me anyway the
reason why you think this way is because
you view women as special women are not
special at all okay they are lower on
the food chain than you are so that
should already give you this air of
confidence like I'm better than you by
Nature I'm stronger than you I'm more
competent than you in a lot of
situations why would I be
nervous about talking to you having a
random conversation see most dudes don't
look at them as random conversations
because they have an outcome okay but
all you have to understand is women like
guys who are attractive on the outside
but don't bring too much pressure when
they're conversing with them see guys
always miss this women can feel your
energy and when you're acting weird and
you're acting outcome dependent a woman
can tell because you're going to be
doing little things to try and impress
her to try to improve your chances of
getting this chick out on a date no
women are not special this is why
you know when a guy has that air of
confidence about him he's smooth
sve it always comes off that way because
he's like yo this has worked for me so
many times before it's going to work
again this is just who I am there's no
need to hide who I am and pretend to be
something I'm not because a lot of women
like this when I present myself so all I
have to do is keep doing it over and
over again because she's not special no
matter how pretty she is no matter how
much money she makes you see this is a
funny thing I want to talk about I
always remember things to bring them
back up later I remember I was talking
about this situation where I matched
with an attorney and me and her were
talking and she was trying to flex her
job not too much but a little bit and I
looked her in the face on the FaceTime
and I said [Β __Β ] you and your job you're
trying to flex on me like you bougie and
[Β __Β ] she smiled at me you know that
smile that women give you when they're
like okay I like this guy I'm intrigued
by this guy I was saying that in the
video and I go in the comment section
and there's a guy that says come on you
really told the lawyer that yeah right
blah blah blah because he views women as
special there's no way a guy could do
that and a woman wouldn't click the
phone on him there's no way because
she's a high earner she's a respectable
woman see this is what I'm saying no a
guy that understands that women go for
whatever the guy is presenting when they
like him because he's confident in what
he's saying respectable High earner high
value woman there's no such thing but
you see when you don't understand and
you view women as better than you you
will tend to think that way so just
remember that women by Nature are not
better than you that should give you
that air of confidence when you're
talking to women number two teasing
women while you're talking to them gives
off good energy it shows the woman that
you're not afraid to ruffle feathers
okay it shows another side of you oh
this guy's really cool this guy's not so
serious see when guys do this whole
serious act with women you'd be
surprised but women are on to game women
know when you start speaking in a manner
of you know well I only like this chick
to do this and I only like my chick to
do that and if I was looking to take a
chick seriously blah blah blah blah blah
see you think it's setting boundaries
but really you're just taking everything
too seriously you understand you set
boundaries with yourself and in your
actions and behaviors a woman knows that
you're not a goofy and you're not going
for goofy games okay but you you can
tease women and tell jokes and a woman's
like okay I don't have to have my guard
up with this guy because he's a fun time
so always remember that don't try to
tell this chick she's so pretty she's
that and the third if anything you can
see something that you could tell she's
insecure about and make a joke about it
and then be like flip it on her nah
that's what I like about you anyway
because you're sexy as hell you don't
let that bother you and she's like I do
let it bother me but this guy's
uplifting me you see how a joke leads to
other things never be uptight with women
you can tease them it transitions into a
bunch of things like if you told a woman
hey I just figured I'd come over here
and give you the opportunity to talk to
me if she laughs at that and she's like
oh I like your confidence there you go
that gets the ball rolling you're only
saying that to see her reaction and if
it isn't up to your standards or your
liking you keep it pushing but when you
tease women more often than not you're
going to understand that they view you
as attractive okay and that's a level of
your attractiveness see there's
different levels to this there's the
looks there's your mouth there's things
that you say okay this is why I came up
with that 35 dating app openers because
instead of just liking a picture or
saying the hey how are you doing or hey
what's up you actually have something to
say that lets her respond to that and
then you guys keep going back and forth
and the conversation can flow because if
you open up good this chick is like okay
he seems like a fun time or chicks are
going to tell you things like I bet you
say that to all the girls you need to
let a woman see your personality okay so
when you teach is a woman you let her
know that you're not all uptight she can
have fun with you and that is going to
give you more confidence when you see it
happening over and over and over again
with multiple women number three asking
women why it challenges women and it
makes them think see this is exactly why
guys think they're going to run out of
things to say women like to
talk women love to talk when they're
into you or they have some sort of
interest in you and you ask a woman why
she will go on and on on and on and on
again right and then that gives you the
opportunity to go back at her well oh
yeah actually I experienced the same
thing I remember this one time see how
that goes you're going back and forth
but if you ask her why oh yeah why is it
that you think that way or what brought
you to believe these things then she
will start talking and talking and
talking and talking and talking and
talking then you can pinpoint something
that she said and then build off of that
you guys go back and forth all right
remember it's the same thing that you
would do with any other human being but
when you view women as special you're
like oh well I want to ask her something
to lead to this no stop being outcome
dependent if you really want to get to
know her it's going to show when you're
asking these type of questions why well
why is that oh yeah but what about that
when you said that you know it was
making me think a
lot why' you how' you come to that way
of thinking and a woman would just go on
and on and on again the conversation
will flow always ask why because when
you ask a woman why right it's kind of
like she has to qualify for you she has
to impress you a woman can say something
to you that will move another man and
you ask her what the hell is up with
that why and then she's like oh he's not
moved by that now I have to explain
myself number four sharing experiences
and telling stories makes the
conversation go better so if you tell a
chick like this all right tell me a
story keep me
entertained she will tell you a story if
you ask ask a chick what's the most
spontaneous thing You' ever done she
will tell you a story if you ask a woman
so tell me a story so I can get a better
read on you a better understanding on
you she will start telling you a story
so when she starts telling you the story
in the middle of it you could be like yo
oh [Β __Β ] I went through something kind of
similar to that that's crazy she's going
to be like oh yeah no no no but finish
her story she finishes her story you
start and share your story right now if
you have a way with your words you will
tell a better story than her so you're
like oh that's peanuts check this out
you tell a story or share an experience
or she might have went somewhere that
you went and then you guys talk about
that but this is what I'm saying when
you're sharing experiences and you know
how to talk you're always going to make
your experience seem Wilder more
spontaneous so now she's even more
intrigued with you okay but see dudes
are always trying to figure out how can
I create a bond with this chick How can
I see if we have similar things in
common telling stories and sharing
experiences I'm telling you bro it's
it's it's next to nothing but you have
to be cool about it but when you share
experiences and you tell stories and if
you're a good Storyteller like you'll be
such a good Storyteller you'll have one
story in particular that you tell
everybody cuz you're like yo I do this
the best and everybody's shocked by it
so when you're a good Storyteller that
builds that confidence and when you're
in conversation with with a woman when
you're conversing you're going to
exchange stories and experiences and
then she's going to come to figure out
okay this dude is a cool ass dude number
five stop thinking of the outcome of any
type of approach and also nobody's
watching you bro nobody's watching you
when I get on coaching calls and I talk
to subscribers or clients the brothers
there there's always this one thing that
guys say
too yo but everybody is going to be
watching me and I don't want people to
think that I'm thirsty news flash okay
when you believe what people say in
society and you believe in what women
say instead of what they pay attention
to or what they go for you're going to
believe that let's say a guy approached
a girl right let's say I approach a girl
she rejects me right in front of her
face I go to another girl and talk to
her that would classify me in her eyes
as thirsty look at this guy out here
approaching women like that who does he
think he is okay she didn't want to take
me up on my offer the next chick does am
I thirsty or am I just an opportunist
and a go-getter like let's be real with
the terminology and the words it's not
about you being thirsty okay you shoot
your shot at a chick she declines you
move on you are not thirsty thirsty
equals chasing if you shoot your shot
move on you are not chasing you tried to
pursue she doesn't want to be pursued so
you cut your losses stop stop with all
this people are looking at me nobody
gives a damn nobody's looking at you
guys think when they go and approach a
woman that the whole world stops
everybody stops and looks at them and
goes and starts looking at them like yo
look he got rejected boo loser Dum d d
Dum D Dum stupid no that's not how
things work nobody cares bro nobody
knows what you're talking about unless
you go up to a group of women that's
different but if you want to approach a
woman just approach a woman and even if
you're approaching a group of women all
you have to do is introduce yourself to
everybody and make everybody feel
comfortable to some degree and then go
in on the target that's it it's so
simple if you get rejected you get
rejected and I understand guys think
rejection is such a big deal no no no no
no rejection turns you into a beast bro
cuz after you've been rejected so many
times it's nothing you're like oh this
is the way it's supposed to go when you
go through Rejection it only builds up
your confidence more anyway and it makes
you more confident mark my words anybody
who's going to sit here and say well no
rejection tears a man down and rejection
doesn't feel good and blah blah blah and
all they do is wait around to reject you
and blah blah blah okay but then where
do we it's like moving the goalpost
everywhere so if you want to sit and
wait for choosing signals you know you
can still get rejected off of choosing
signals so then what's the need for the
choosing signals rejection is bound to
happen but it builds up that confidence
number six being straight up with women
shows the utmost confidence so guys are
always trying to figure out a way of how
can I talk about sex with a woman so if
you're talking to a woman no matter if
you approach her you get her number
you're talking later or you match on an
app and you talk for a little bit and
then you ask this woman so what are you
looking for are you looking to just hook
up or you looking for something you know
more serious and then she says oh well
really I'm into the serious thing but
what about you and you say you know I'm
looking to casually hook up but if
something comes up and a woman proves
herself you know I'm not closed off to
that conversation that's a conversation
I would have but for right now I'm just
trying to take it easy I don't want to
rush into anything I don't think that
would be fair and she's going to be like
oh yeah that makes sense and the only
reason the main reason why she's going
to say okay that makes sense is because
she's attracted to you in that moment
it's like a light bulb goes on light
switch turns on oh [Β __Β ] she said this
but is going against that because she
finds me attractive
women say no hookups on their profiles
yeah they're not talking to you if they
find you attractive bro I know they tell
you you know a lot of guys think you
have to lie to women you can do whatever
you want you could try to pull the wool
over their eyes it's fine but that's
only going to build resentment and you
know some [Β __Β ] can happen but listen
when you really think about it being
straight up with a woman is actually in
your favor because if a woman's
attracted to you she's not going to
reject you if anything she'll reject you
off rip or once you try to get sexual
she will will reject you but you know
everything you need to know with that
one question right there number seven
stop comparing yourself to other men
stop all this talk of Chad Tyrone Pooky
Ray Ray oh you know the high value man
and this that stop comparing yourself to
other men go for the women see this is
exactly why dude say well I can't get
the women that I really want but I get
women okay so which which one is it you
got to pick a struggle here the reason
why you're saying that is because you
look at a woman right as up here and if
that other guy can get her then you're
not on the same level as that other guy
because you want her to walk around with
her and validate yourself and prove to
everybody that yeah I can get a hot girl
no no no no no the woman that you're
really into looks are a bonus and she is
that to you she is pretty to you she's
beautiful to you and it's not only the
looks it's every other thing that she
can provide it's how she wants to serve
you okay so stop comparing yourself to
other men men because you don't know a
dude could be with a really attractive
chick but she treats him like complete
crap she's a brat she whines he has to
whine and dine her he has to spoil her
or if not she's gone but you don't know
that from the outside looking in stop
comparing yourself to other men you're
never going to be confident when you do
that you're never going to you're never
going to be confident this is what you
should do that guy does this a certain
way he's successful let me try that way
and you know work with my game and try
to see if I can Implement some things
that he does because I see it works but
never say I want to be just like that
guy no stop comparing yourself to dudes
man the [Β __Β ] is weak it's not going to
build you any confidence number eight a
simple hello goes a long way so when
you're out and about and you say hello
to a chick that's all it is man don't
take this stuff too seriously you need
to be looking for it if women have good
interactions with you even in their body
language if they smile at you if they're
comfortable around you if they don't
look at you in utter disgust okay that's
all you need to be looking for that will
build your confidence right there when
you say hello to a woman she says hello
back you automatically know you can draw
a response out of women cuz I'm I'm
going to keep it so real with you you
can hold the door open for a woman
nowadays you can say hello and she will
look at you and ignore you and walk past
you that is one of the things that will
happen when a woman is rejecting you in
public she won't even talk to you you'll
go walk up to a chick try to talk to her
she will completely keep walking like
she never heard you so if you can draw
reactions out of women with a simple
hello you see it's like the the video
signs you're more attractive than you
think these little things that go over
your head you just don't even understand
you just totally sweep them under the
rug no if you can draw reactions out of
women with a simple hello a wave come
here and women actually listen and do it
bro all this stuff goes a long way and
when you see it you're like yo I'm that
dude it builds your confidence you
understand there's no reason to not say
hello number nine holding eye contact is
key it builds more confidence when you
hold eye contact with a woman she's
going to look away when she sees that
you're attractive with how you look your
presentation and your words you know how
to articulate yourself a woman cannot
help but to look away sometimes and then
there's sometimes where a woman is so
intrigued she keeps eye contact with you
but a lot of the times women can't help
but look away remember what I said
before you Are Better Than a Woman by
Nature so when you're confident your
looks are on point you know how to
articulate yourself you have a way with
words a woman already knows I can't I
can't compete I can't compete now unless
she's a little brat with that spoiled
mentality that's a different thing but
for your average woman out here man a
woman knows this is why women will Auto
reject you or have an attitude with you
sometimes they're like yo this he's too
good this is why guys get ghosted they
don't even understand that part A lot of
the times when you get rejected and
ghosted it's not even because you did
something wrong or that she doesn't like
you women know that they can't compete
they can't bro they know that if they
get with you they're going to have to
elevate themselves they're going to have
to meet a standard because you're that
guy so they're like oh no I'd rather go
deal with some dude who's lesser than
that because I can't add up to that but
it's when you're a complete package
bro just hold eye contact when you're
talking to women and you're going to see
man you're going to see how women see
you now if you think that women aren't
going to see you in a positive light
just still try to implement some of
these things and it's going to work out
because I'm tired of this like it's all
about looks money status BS no when
you're a confident dude your actions and
behaviors is what attracts a woman to
you this was how to be more confident
talking to girls hope you guys got a lot
out of this video If your boy Justin J
get with you boys in the next video like
comment subscribe let's go boys let's go
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