Q&A DARK FEMININE ENERGY

Summary

The speaker in this script delves into the dynamics of gender, sexuality, and emotional intelligence, emphasizing the societal pressures and judgments that shape men's and women's behaviors. They discuss the importance of embracing one's sexuality and emotions to avoid manipulation and control, especially in romantic relationships. The script also touches on the concept of 'shadow work' and the 'golden Shadow,' urging individuals to recognize and integrate disowned parts of themselves. Additionally, the speaker advocates for self-exploration and understanding one's body, including the use of the 'tampon test' as a fun way to gauge attraction and compatibility.

Takeaways

• 🚶 Men are often not judged for embracing their sexuality from a young age, whereas they may be criticized for showing vulnerability in their emotions.
• 💪 Emotionally intelligent men are less likely to be manipulated by others, highlighting the importance of emotional literacy for self-protection in relationships.
• 🌟 The concept of 'golden Shadow' suggests that attraction or aversion to someone can indicate qualities we disown in ourselves, which can be a part of personal growth.
• 🔓 Understanding and integrating one's sexuality is crucial for personal empowerment and can prevent manipulation in relationships.
• 🎶 The speaker metaphorically compares the awakening of sexuality to music that can stir emotions but should not control one's actions.
• 🌱 Longing and desire are natural human impulses that signal unmet needs, and it's essential to address these needs responsibly.
• 💡 Education on emotional and sexual health is vital for well-being, as it can prevent issues like atrophy of sexual desire and understanding one's true needs.
• 🧘‍♀️ The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-exploration and understanding one's body's responses to different situations, such as using the 'tampon test' for gauging attraction.
• 🛑 The 'tampon test' is presented as a fun and informal way to collect data about one's body's reactions but should not be used to address deeper issues like trauma.
• 🤝 The speaker encourages seeking professional help, like coaching or therapy, for personalized guidance and to deal with complex personal issues effectively.

Q & A

Why are men not judged for embracing their sexuality at a young age?

Men are often encouraged to embrace their sexuality from a young age and are not judged for it, unlike women who may be criticized for showing similar openness about their sexuality.

What is the 'golden Shadow' concept mentioned in the script?

The 'golden Shadow' refers to the idea that we are sometimes attracted to people because they exhibit qualities that we wish we could have or express more freely, which we may have disowned or suppressed within ourselves.

Why is it difficult for a manipulative woman to control an emotionally intelligent man?

An emotionally intelligent man has done the work to understand and integrate his emotions, making it difficult for a manipulative woman to control him because he is in tune with his feelings and less likely to be swayed by external influences.

What does the speaker suggest is the reason some women are attracted to 'players'?

The speaker suggests that some women are attracted to 'players' because they themselves have not integrated or are uncomfortable with their own sexuality, and they seek to live out their repressed sexuality through the 'player'.

How does the speaker define 'high value' in terms of self-worth and self-esteem?

High value is defined by having high self-worth, high self-esteem, and a healthy self-image. These attributes contribute to a person's overall sense of self-worth and confidence, which is essential for not being easily manipulated or controlled.

What is the importance of understanding and accepting one's own sexuality according to the script?

Understanding and accepting one's own sexuality is crucial as it prevents manipulation by others, particularly in sexual contexts. When a woman owns her sexuality, she is less likely to be controlled by a man, as she is in tune with her desires and can manage them independently.

What does the speaker mean by 'Unleash Your Dog feminine'?

To 'Unleash Your Dog feminine' means to embrace and express one's raw, natural feminine energy and sexuality without shame or inhibition, which can lead to empowerment and resistance to manipulation.

Why does the speaker emphasize the importance of having a healthy sex life for women?

The speaker emphasizes the importance of a healthy sex life because it is linked to overall health and well-being. Regular orgasms can help balance body chemistry, improve sleep, and maintain a healthy sex drive.

What is the 'tampon test' mentioned in the script and what is its purpose?

The 'tampon test' is a fun and informal method suggested by the speaker to gauge sexual attraction or compatibility with a potential partner by monitoring changes in one's body, such as the wetness of a tampon, during different dates.

How does the speaker address the issue of longing in the context of relationships?

The speaker addresses longing as a natural human impulse that should not be suppressed or judged. It is a signal that a need is not being met, and it is the individual's responsibility to understand and meet that need, whether it is through seeking companionship or addressing deeper issues of self-worth and self-esteem.

Outlines

00:00

🚹 Emotional Suppression and Sexuality in Men

The speaker discusses societal expectations that encourage men to embrace their sexuality from a young age without judgment, unlike their emotional expression, which is often suppressed. This leads to men potentially being emotionally weak and susceptible to emotional manipulation by women. The speaker suggests that emotionally intelligent men are less likely to be manipulated. They also touch on the concept of 'golden Shadow' or 'Shadow work', explaining that attraction or aversion to someone can indicate a disowned part of oneself that the other person embodies. The speaker encourages understanding and embracing one's sexuality as a form of self-acceptance and power, which can prevent manipulation.

05:01

🔓 The Importance of Self-Exploration and Sexual Health

This paragraph delves into the importance of self-awareness and emotional mastery, particularly in relation to natural impulses such as longing. The speaker criticizes the lack of education about emotions and argues that understanding and meeting one's own needs is crucial to avoid unhealthy behaviors in relationships. They emphasize the necessity of orgasm for a woman's health and well-being, suggesting a minimum frequency for balance, and discuss the potential consequences of sexual inactivity, such as atrophy of one's sex drive. The speaker also addresses the role of spirituality and personal beliefs in sexual exploration, advocating for a balanced and informed approach to sexuality.

10:02

🚼 The Necessity of Touch and Human Connection

The speaker highlights the fundamental human need for touch and connection, drawing parallels to the importance of nurturing touch for infants and its impact on adult well-being. They discuss the potential negative effects of denying oneself touch, such as becoming 'feral' due to a lack of physical contact. The paragraph also touches on the idea that exercise can be a means of releasing energy but may not fully replicate the benefits of sexual release. The speaker encourages individuals to consider the importance of touch and human connection in their lives and to seek out healthy ways to fulfill these needs.

15:04

📚 Investing in Relationship Education

The speaker passionately argues for the importance of investing in relationship education, suggesting that the lack of focus on this area can lead to significant personal and societal costs. They draw a parallel between the investment in coaching or therapy and the potential costs of not addressing relationship issues, such as divorce. The speaker emphasizes that understanding and nurturing relationships are key to happiness and well-being, and they encourage taking advantage of courses and coaching to gain the necessary knowledge and skills.

20:05

💧 The Tampon Test: A Fun Tool for Self-Discovery

The speaker introduces the 'tampon test' as a light-hearted method for women to gauge their level of attraction or compatibility with a potential partner. They explain that changes in the body's response, such as the wetness of a tampon, can provide insight into one's feelings and reactions to another person. The speaker emphasizes that this test should be used in conjunction with other forms of self-exploration and journaling to gain a deeper understanding of oneself. They also caution against taking the test too seriously and highlight its role as a fun and additional tool for self-discovery.

25:06

🤝 Seeking Professional Help for Personal Growth

In this paragraph, the speaker encourages individuals to seek professional help, such as coaching or counseling, to address deeper issues that may be affecting their lives. They acknowledge that while group settings can be beneficial, some issues require personalized attention. The speaker offers a pathway to healing through coaching sessions and emphasizes the importance of understanding one's unique situation. They also mention the value of integrating insights from coaching sessions with ongoing therapeutic work, advocating for a comprehensive approach to personal development.

30:09

🌟 Embracing Lifelong Learning and Community Support

The speaker concludes by reiterating the importance of ongoing education and community support in personal growth. They express gratitude for the audience's participation and encourage continued engagement through the Black Relationship Academy's app and master classes. The speaker stresses the commitment to making education accessible and emphasizes the value of lifelong learning in relationships and self-improvement. They sign off with a message of love and appreciation, highlighting the interconnectedness of personal development and community involvement.

Keywords

💡Sexuality

Sexuality in the video is discussed as a fundamental aspect of human identity and expression. It is highlighted as something that men are often encouraged to embrace without judgment from a young age, unlike women who may face societal pressures to suppress their sexual emotions. The script suggests that understanding and integrating one's sexuality is crucial for emotional intelligence and avoiding manipulation in relationships.

💡Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence refers to the ability to recognize, understand, and manage one's own emotions and those of others. In the context of the video, it is portrayed as a quality that can make a person less susceptible to manipulation, particularly in romantic relationships. The script implies that emotionally intelligent individuals are better equipped to navigate social dynamics and maintain healthy relationships.

💡Shadow Work

Shadow work is a psychological concept that involves exploring and integrating the darker, often repressed aspects of one's personality. The video uses this term to describe the process of acknowledging and accepting parts of oneself that have been disowned or denied, such as suppressed emotions or desires. It is suggested that engaging in shadow work can lead to personal growth and a more authentic life experience.

💡Golden Shadow

The 'Golden Shadow' is a term used in the script to describe the qualities or characteristics that one admires in others but has repressed within themselves. It is related to the concept of 'shadow work' and suggests that attraction or envy towards others can be a signal to explore and integrate these qualities into one's own personality.

💡Manipulation

Manipulation, as discussed in the video, is the act of influencing someone in a way that is not straightforward or honest, often for one's own advantage. The script warns against being vulnerable to manipulation, especially in the context of romantic relationships, and suggests that self-awareness and emotional intelligence can help prevent it.

💡Self-Worth

Self-worth in the video is presented as an essential component of being 'high value' in relationships. It refers to the intrinsic value and self-respect that an individual holds for themselves, independent of external validation. The script implies that having a strong sense of self-worth can protect against negative relationship dynamics and emotional exploitation.

💡Longing

Longing is depicted in the video as a natural human impulse for connection, affection, and companionship. It is described as a signal from one's emotional realm indicating unmet needs. The video emphasizes the importance of understanding and addressing these longings rather than repressing them, as they are part of the human experience and contribute to overall well-being.

💡Emotional Mastery

Emotional mastery is the ability to manage one's emotions effectively and respond to life's challenges with emotional intelligence. The video script suggests that a lack of education about emotions can lead to misunderstanding and mishandling of natural emotional responses, such as longing. It is presented as a skill that can be learned and applied to improve one's emotional health and relationship dynamics.

💡Dark Feminine

The 'Dark Feminine' in the video refers to a powerful, untamed aspect of femininity that includes sexual energy and self-expression. It is associated with the idea of embracing one's sexuality and not being ashamed or repressed about it. The script suggests that women who are in touch with their 'dark feminine' are less likely to be manipulated or controlled in relationships.

💡Orgasm

The video discusses the importance of orgasm for women's health and well-being, suggesting that it helps balance body chemistry and contributes to overall physical and emotional health. The script emphasizes that women should not feel ashamed or guilty about seeking orgasm, whether through self-pleasure or with a partner, as it is a natural and necessary part of sexual health.

💡Self-Abandonment

Self-abandonment in the video is described as a state of neglecting one's own needs and well-being. It is suggested that this can lead to vulnerability and negative outcomes, such as being taken advantage of or experiencing trauma. The script encourages self-awareness and self-care to prevent self-abandonment and promote a healthier approach to life and relationships.

Highlights

Men are not judged for embracing their sexuality from a young age, unlike women who are shamed for expressing emotions.

Men's emotional expression is often suppressed, leading to a perceived weakness that women can exploit emotionally.

Emotional intelligence in men makes them less susceptible to manipulation by women.

Individuals attracted to or repulsed by others may be responding to qualities they disown in themselves.

The 'golden Shadow' concept suggests attraction to people who exhibit desired but repressed qualities.

Understanding and embracing one's sexuality can prevent manipulation by others.

Women who are in denial of their power are more susceptible to being played by men.

High self-worth, self-esteem, and a healthy self-image are essential for being considered high value.

Longing is a natural human need, and ignoring it can lead to emotional and physical health issues.

Education about emotions and self-worth is crucial for understanding and addressing natural impulses.

Meeting one's own needs leads to less desperation and healthier relationships.

Compatibility in relationships involves emotional, spiritual, and sexual alignment.

The 'dark masculine' and 'dark feminine' energies should be balanced and healthy, not destructive.

Exploring one's sexuality should be done safely and without shame, respecting personal boundaries and beliefs.

Orgasms are essential for a woman's health, balancing body chemistry, and aiding sleep.

Women should aim for a minimum of three orgasms per week for overall well-being.

Self-exploration and understanding one's body's responses are important aspects of self-care.

The 'tampon test' is a fun, informal way to gauge sexual attraction and compatibility.

Trauma and self-abandonment can lead to deeper issues that require professional help beyond self-help methods.

Investing in relationship education can prevent future emotional and financial costs.

Transcripts

because men are encouraged to embrace

their

sexuality they're not judged for it at a

very very young age they're not judged

for it what men are judg for in their

emotions stop crying stop being a

that's why men get right they're not

encouraged to to to explore their

emotionality um so then they become a

little bit weak that's why women can

control men emotionally the reason men

can control women now if a man has done

the work and he's emotionally

intelligent he becomes very difficult

for a manipulative woman to manipulate

him

correct so in the same way why you get

gotten by players is because you have

not integrated and you are not

comfortable and you carry shame guilt

and or fear around your sexuality so

you're hoping to actually live out your

sexuality through him through him you

find permission to be a version of

yourself so I believe uh Kang calls it

the golden Shadow the golden Shadow is

or even part of Shadow work is

understanding that we're sometimes

attracted to a person because they

exhibit uh qualities we wish we could so

we're either attracted to them or we

hate them so if you find yourself having

a visceral response to maybe another

woman oh what do she think she is you

it's simply part is saying to you that

there's a part of me that I've dis that

disowned denied rejected that she is

freely walking in how dare she right or

a golden Shadow is when you know we look

at you know I don't know who your big

celebrity person is or your pastor or

whoever you look up to your Mentor oh my

gosh I really look up to you you look up

to them because they

are you their strength their power their

prowess their magnificence whatever you

envying them actually is in you but you

repress it denied it disowned it because

maybe you were told to shut up or

whatever the story is so when we're

doing Shadow work so this is something

that you have to do in terms of your

Shadow work and it's about really

understanding that the player only can

play a woman who is in denial of her

power you get into your sexuality and

you Unleash Your Dog feminine and trust

me a man cannot manipulate you sexually

like that he becomes a bit like music

you know we're talking about music the

music that turns us on the gets us in

the mood that music can't manipulate us

you that music is not going to make now

if it's doing that then we probably need

to figure out whether other energies are

connected to that music okay if music is

getting you to do things that you

wouldn't ordinarily do then we might

have to question it but ultimately that

music is almost like fire underneath

what is already existing what already

exists it's Awakening something that is

asleep in the same I hope you can

understand this but in the the same way

a player only has impact in a woman

who's who's disowned her sexuality if

you are in your

sexuality he and then you have owned it

he he's not going to he's not going to

have control over you because you own it

it's yours you you can turn yourself on

and off at will because you're so

connected to your vagina energy that no

one can own it cuz you own it right your

vagina isn't just um

the reproductive part that brings you

pleasure it's also energy it's a

spiritual

portal and it's a spiritual entity and

it's it is designed to be such so I hope

that answers your question um it's

really let's work on what you're denying

repressing and disowning and it's not to

say that you won't be attracted to the

player but these are the women that turn

players into little boys because when he

only has this sexual charge for you but

your charge is heavier then he becomes

obsessed with you nor the other way

around being high value has to do with

high self-worth high self-esteem and a

healthy IM self-image that's that's high

you can't be high value without those

things high self-worth high self-esteem

and a healthy self-image and being high

status that's high value longing doesn't

take away from being any of those things

especially if you understand that

longing is a part of your being it is

not a disease that you need

to

cure if you are not longing for touch

and longing for affection and longing

for companionship you're really not

healthy because we are hardwired for

connection we're hardwired for

attachment this is a human need this is

like food so if you have no longing then

that's a problem the problem is that

because we haven't got an education

about how our emotions work emotional

Mastery because we don't have an

education about who we even are when we

get signals like longing from our

emotional realm that is trying to

educate us on what's going on inside of

our body and inside of our

Lives depending on who we're listening

to on social media who comes up with hey

if you are Des and want a man so bad

then you need Jesus or you need to

repent or you need therapy depending on

who you're listening to you're going to

attach that message to to your natural

impulse and then judge yourself what you

must understand about natural impulses

is that they're there to to signal to

you that there's a need that's not being

met and you are responsible to meet that

need if it's finding and you know being

with a partner you must be deliberate

intentional about doing so you know I I

really really don't like the messaging

that goes out that if you do nothing

he'll come or whatever this ridiculous

whatever if you want to eat you're going

to have to work and go to the

supermarket and cook the food or or food

just does isn't going to just show up

okay because every natural urge longing

and desire has a process it you have to

meet it you are the adult who is

responsible for meeting that need you

can meet it slowly you can meet it

deliberately now if you are meeting a

lot of your own needs you're not going

to be desperate needy thirsty and acting

crazy in the dating world and letting

these men run all over you because

you're doing the inner work of of

meeting your own needs but if you are

not doing that work then what you're

going to do is look for that man to do

it or just sign out of dating or

relationships period in which case

you're not now feral so one doesn't

cancel out the other especially if we

understand that longing is a normal is a

normal a normal thing you know you're

not sick is it true that the dark

masculine likes what the dark Fe

feminine accepts right so this is about

sexuality and again

self-awareness just because for instance

your partner wants to have an orgy or a

threesome or s with another

couple it doesn't mean oh if I wear in

my dog feminine I'm going to be okay

with that that's not how this works

right this is now an issue of

compatibility you know when we're

talking about compatibility we're

talking about

emotional you know uh compatibility

spiritual sexual compatibility you know

if a man wants to do something once you

are connected to your sexuality and your

sexuality is explosive but the idea of

having an ory it does not work for you

and I'm using an extreme example because

I don't want to start naming things that

people are doing and uncomfortable with

and you might be doing it if you are

comfortable with it um and that works

for you then that's fine but I don't

want anyone internalizing and thinking

just because a man's dark masculine now

remember that is the untethered

masculine then there's the untethered

dark there's the untethered dark

masculine then tell the dark feminine

they're now at these kind of extremities

where

they're likely to not do much in the way

of net good right they're taking from

the world rather than giving to the

world we're talking about healthy um

tethered balanced dark masculine energy

you shouldn't really be having to

acas to something that you do not feel

safe and comfortable

doing if you are in your darkg feminine

chances are you going to be open to at

least exploring it okay this is we also

have to factor in your religion your

spirituality we've got other factors

that we need to put in here okay but I'm

just just as a principle if you are

connected to your dog feminine there are

some things that you're going to want to

explore they're going to be curious

about and and the dark masculine May

introduce those to you or ask you of

those things but you always have to

check in with your body that's what I'm

going to say for now or you just call

the coach and figure out how you're

going to okay I think I like this

question coming up hello amazing course

kindly share ideas exploring pleasure

sexually as a single

woman when it comes to your pleasure you

got to figure that at all by yourself

and I say that

because this is when I say by yourself I

mean book a CO a coach call because I

don't want to say anything out here I

don't set the laws for people and how

they explore their sexuality honestly if

you belong to a congregation where

masturbation or your pastor or your sect

of or religion does not permit

masturbation don't be coming here and

saying Changi says it's okay because

that has nothing to do with me but again

you know I need us to be educated when

it comes to sex and maybe we should have

a sex course because masturbation an

orgasm is necessary so I'm going to take

masturbation out of it but an orgasm is

necessary for the health and balancing

of the

body whether we like it or

not orgasming helps balance the Body

Balance the body chemistry do a billion

other things help with sleep issues some

of us are not sleeping because we don't

orgasms so orgasms for a woman like I

said have immense benefits on so many

levels

so what the science says is that a woman

should be orgasm three times a week

minimum for her to balance out her

body I am not a sex expert I'm not a

doctor I'm just giving you the

information that I have that is relevant

to my expertise as a relationship

expert so what you do need to be having

a three orgasms a week whether you give

them to yourself or have somebody give

them to you that's between you your God

and your conscience okay and yourself

but I'm telling you what you

need if you do not give them to yourself

your sex drive will

atrophy you will stop having the desires

and the longings for sex you will meet a

guy

and he will ignite the flame for a

little bit but you will go right back to

what is normal you will completely lose

control of your sex drive you will lose

your you will lose it now you can do

this work we're talking about and do the

the my do yeah your vagina will atrophy

it's like it's a muscle you if you don't

use it you lose it basically um if you

don't use your legs you eventually lose

use of them it's the same thing as your

sexuality and your sex drive and your

vagina if you condition it to not orgasm

when you are married that's when you

start having problems I'm going to give

you what I personally not professionally

or because because I know my limits I'm

not a sex expert um

personally I have no problem with people

masturbating I recommend it um in terms

of is better than rejecting denying and

atrophying and all of these things but I

do feel that if that is a path that you

want to

take you know you want to

refrain you might want to use toys you

might want to do whatever but you don't

want to get caught up in pornography you

don't want to get caught up in there

some there a lot of slippery slopes

along the way because once you get

caught up in US using dildos and these

machines that a penis a normal human

penis cannot mimic you're kind of again

going to put yourself in a place where

you're desensitized when you are

actually in a sexual relationship with a

man but I do feel that toys have a very

important part in the

bedroom um so

really three times a week find a way to

give yourself an orgasm for the

balancing of your body if you're and

your spirituality does not permit then

your sex job is literally going to

atrophy and for whatever whatever your

spirituality is around

that the prayer and the hope is that it

will mitigate that if that makes sense

so if I'm not allowed to because I'm a

Christian and I'm not supposed to and

it's not good for me says my pastor

because I haven't seen it in the Bible

personally but feel free to to let me

know um I've read the Bible many many

times but I can't claim to know

absolutely everything uh so yeah um they

might be a sense of the interpretation

might therefore but there's no clear for

me do not do it right

so let's say for you is to not do it

then you must know that there's a

miracle that you're going to expect to

happen that's going to mitigate the

atrophying of your sex drive or that is

going to regulate you with you doing it

and um hand on heart there's some weird

Behavior out here in these streets that

women exhibit and I know it's

because they've become

feral because when you don't allow

yourself to be touched by your own hands

or by somebody's hands we do become

feral because being touched is an

important part of the human experience

and life so they've done some you know

work and they realize some you know some

research and some experiments and they

realize that you can feed a baby when a

baby comes out of the womb you can feed

it clothe but if you do not touch it and

hug it it will die now if you are built

that way and then you decide because I'm

older and I'm stronger I'm not going to

allow myself to touch or be

touched because of my faith or my

spirituality or my interpretation of my

faith or whatever it

is then my prayer for you is that your

faith will somehow mitigate that and

that's what I'm going to say around that

that I may ask something is exercise can

exercise give you maybe the same kind of

um release though if let's say there's

someone who maybe like I'm never

attaching sex tours I'm never doing this

but they want to get that same feeling

are there other things like exercise or

something that might give you the same

feeling of that release or other things

or is it something that is more that

they they would have to look into and

research exercise is good for you know

releasing that energy but also it can

also fuel you up quite frankly you know

depending on what how old you are

because as we get older testosterone

levels increase and all of these things

in the gym can only give actually help

your sex drive I don't think we should

be running away from our sexuality

honestly or trying to repress it one

who's done that and seeing what that

looks like on the other side it takes a

while for our minds to really to figure

it out right I understand that I want to

encourage you

to take advantage of the sale get this

course again and go through it a few

times because for some of us this brand

new concept for some of us we've heard

it before whether it's in BSN or you

know we've kind of touched on it we've

been around me long enough but a lot of

these

questions I know some of them were being

asked on the way to where we're going so

maybe they've already been answered as

we were going along um but I my

recommendation is go through this again

go through it slowly uh there'll be

workbooks you'll be able to pause and

meditate and think and if you still have

more questions you know join the blacks

one app just download it on your phone

ask the question the coaches myself or

Poppin will will do a live or answer

your question um I think that's probably

the best way because yeah some are and

some are kind of repetitive but yeah

anymore no cuz they're all based about

longing and SE and having sexuality and

it's kind of Bal Bing the dark feminine

with it so it's the yes I kind of

suspected and and this is why this

course has been in my computer because I

knew that this was going to be a little

bit

mindboggling

for a lot of

us and I am happy to my coaches are

happy to have honestly an honest Frank

direct conversation with you in person

if you book a call we will talk to you

in your face straight I mean we won me

towards with you but wisdom tells me to

leave it

there as long as nobody is

confused I'm going to leave it there if

you want to ask me a direct question and

get a direct answer in terms of your

situation your circumstance because I

need to understand your level of if

you're a Christian I need to understand

your depth of understanding of

scripture I need to know where you're

coming from I need to weigh your spirit

you know if you are not and you're

spiritual I need to know where your

spirituality is based in I need to

understand you our coaches need to

understand you as an individual to

honestly be able to tell you what's

going on a lot of these longing

questions are a woman who has low

self-esteem low selfworth doesn't have

any real deep Foundation about who she

is is having some man play her like a

tambourine because she has no idea and

these longings are the longings that

come from a woman who doesn't who who

just doesn't have self-worth or

self-esteem that's the truth and that's

not the longing I'm talking about in the

dark feminine a lot of these longings

are I really like this guy and he

doesn't like me back how am I going to

just you know get him back doesn't

that's insecurity that's that's

Brokenness that's trauma okay talking

because they're two very different

conversations longing that I'm talking

about in this instance and so I knew

that some of us would get into that

whole longing longing thing you need to

do the high value strategies you need to

do emotional Mastery you need to do

mastering attraction Master Class you

need to understand those three courses

and you need to pick up your phone or

get to the back end you managed to pay a

pound to come here so you know how the

black one website works you know how to

access help so you're not new to this

world because you've done it once and

I'm I'm just saying one pound I know

some of you paid way more than that

thank you we appreciate your donations

and and the charity is going to be so

happy and so blessed because of your

giving um and I appreciate you and I'm

grateful for every one pound and however

much you have spent but I want you to

love yourself enough to pick up the

phone to go to the website to book a

discovery call even if it's the one

thing do this year in

2024 make it the one thing you do this

year because you will pay the piper

you're going to pay the piper now or

you'll pay the piper later but you will

pay the piper if you do not deal with

these parts of yourself now you will

deal with them later and it will be

harder and I always say when we pay

later we pay with interest getting a

coaching session now is so much easier

than paying a lawyer for a divorce

no matter how much it's like ah it's so

expensive to get coaching I think I can

do whatever the story is and you'd

rather go on holiday or buy yourself the

Chanel handbag or whatever and some of

us genuinely can't afford any I was you

I was that girl who couldn't even afford

a thing that's why I do these courses

the way I do but I knew that I had to

save the money to get the help I needed

and I did and I here I am because of it

but honestly the price of a divorce I

honestly would have

paid anything to learn what I'm learning

what I'm teaching you now because I

wouldn't have married the guy I would

have married if I knew what I knew now I

wouldn't have made half the mistakes and

lost so much of my life including you

know putting so much into a relationship

than having to walk away empty-handed

for just your peace of mind is what

happens when we don't pay the piper now

we all have an opportunity to pay the

piper now make the investment now

because what you will have to surrender

the piper later it's too expensive right

and so many of us toy with our

relationship education and it's not your

fault we live in a world that told us

that being great in maths science

English having a degree having a masters

having a PhD is way more important than

actually relationships and learning how

to do because relationships are supposed

to be intuitive they're supposed to come

naturally but that is not true

relationships have been from generation

to

generation and they did a study and the

our happiness our health and our wellbe

is not dependent on how much education

we have in the sciences and Tech and all

these things it's actually dependent on

the Rel the quality of our

relationships now the quality of our

relationships determines how long we

live how well we live why are we so

ignorant and happy to stay ignorant and

penny pinching around our relation

relationship education you know it just

doesn't make any sense to me and now

I've got into a run apologize but the

point is let's pay the piper get on the

call if you have a question right now

and you're thinking you know what I I'm

I'm horny as how you know I I like I

said earlier I was talking to a

client and this is not the first client

I've spoken to and she's a

virgin you know uh in into her

30s was the right thing to do and you

know again this is not a bad thing but

without this education she's gone off

you know the

rails you know it's it's just got off

the rails because thank goodness for her

she's made the investment she is making

the investment and she's ready to heal

and I'm grateful that she's only 30 but

we don't know the monsters under our bed

and we are hoping that they're just

going to stay under our bed and we're

going to take we're going to go on that

amazing holiday to wherever and we're

going to buy that amazing outfit and the

demon is just going to stay under your

bed but I promise you take it from me

I'm Nelly 50 I take pride in getting

older take it from a 46 year old woman

I'm sure there women that are older than

me but I've lived a million lives at 46

more lives than most

people it will grow big it will come

from under that thing you're going to

pay so pay now you're here today in this

room with me because God wants you to

know Houston you have a problem

and some of you this course is

enough some of you the courses that

we're going to do are going to be enough

some of you the courses already have

enough some of you the therapy whatever

but some of you I know you were sitting

on some demons you're sitting with a lot

of Shame a lot of guilt there's a lot of

fear you like the idea of what you've

learned tonight it's tickled you but the

Walk of it you don't even know where to

begin you don't even know how to start

and I'm not deliberately withholding

honestly there just some things that can

be done in groups and there's some

things that have to be done in person

it's just how wisdom works so you know

I'm inviting you to take advantage of

the discount code and get in touch with

us we we're here we want to talk to you

we this is how life's works this is what

we're called to do here's a question

that's not about longing that will could

be answered is there a specific date we

should do the tampon

test um I would do it on all your

dates sometimes you'll get a wet tampon

on day one and on day four right so

sometimes you can't maintain attraction

with somebody because you start to see

certain things about them and you start

to become aware of certain things in

your body so I had this guy I dated the

first time my tampon was wet wet wet by

the third day fourth day every time I

left him I would feel sick I would feel

I'd get like a cold and I'd get so ill

so my body went from being completely

turned on to getting actually

sick and the third dat I was kind of

having this little cough so my body

would deteriorate every time because

whilst your body can pick up certain

information and my tampon got drier so

all of this is data so some things you

need to give your body a little bit of a

longer exposure to that's why we say

three dates because if you expose your

body for three days your temple may have

been dry on date one by date three it's

wet if you expose yourself for three

days your tampon may have been wet on

date one but by date three is dry

because sometimes people's energy they

block and close their energy because

they're hiding something that as they

get to know you it becomes harder for

them to to hide so it's really I would

say wear it on every day and then come

home and

journal journal the experience Journal

your feeling about him about it and um

check how wet your your your tampon is

if you are around a guy and you feel

unsafe this is a real issue this is

something you carry in your body this is

an attack is a trauma the tampon test

will not help you you know the tampon

test is for girls who you know don't

carry that kind of trauma and who just

want to know if there's attraction or

compatibility sexually or you know we

definitely do not want to get carried

away with the tampon thing because to be

fair the tampon test is just a bit of

fun it's just a fun way of collecting

data and getting to know yourself

sometimes you know I am always on a

self-discovery level because tell me

I'll tell you something the world

outside of us is huge but the world

within you can't quantify it you are a

whole universe with stars and moons and

all these things so when you are your

feminine energy

self-exploration ex exploring my mind

heart and spirit for me is the most fun

I can have and so I will wear a tampon

when I'm not on my period and I'll do it

for a week because I want to understand

what my body is doing and why is doing

it you know um what are the things my

body reacts to what are the things my

arouses my body you know I'm just

curious about me so when we're talking

about the tampon Test please don't take

it as gospel it's just something fun uh

to do when you go on a date if you want

additional data um it's not to address

trauma I hope that makes sense the

layers to every story you see cuz

sometimes it's not the actual thing that

happened to you but the layers of why it

even happened you know I have I've had

clients who were raped and the rape was

the consequence of long-term

self-abandonment so we do need to deal

with the trauma of the rape but it's

likely going to happen again in

different ways if we don't actually deal

with the issue of self- abandoning and

the self- abandoning comes with a whole

heap of stories

so you know it's not just uh this is the

problem fix it we're not like cars you

know you open the Bonnet and that's

broken let's replace that part we're

very layered we're layered in our being

you know we we have the mind which is

layered we have the heart which is

layered we have the body which is

layered you know and and the woman is

particularly

complex you know men a little bit more

straight forward when you coach a man

it's a little bit of a straightforward

he's complex as a human but he's a

little bit more straightforward but a

woman is very complex so you know we

don't my again I emphasize you know book

a call with a coach use the opportunity

to do that so that we can you know get a

bigger picture of of what's going on

with you and even if you just have that

one call and never have one again you

will get your pathway to healing and

wholeness in an email from the coaches

but even if that's the last time you

have contact with a coach at least we

can help you pinpoint the areas that you

need to actually begin to work on and

with those

intentions you can take them to whatever

practitioner you feel you can afford or

prefer or already using so if you

already have a therapist um you can then

take you know the things that we give

you in the coaching session as

intentions the same thing when we work

with our councel when things come up in

the coaching session we ask you to go

and deal with that particular issue with

as an intention with it with with our

counselor so the best path is Discovery

calling counselor but if you don't want

to do that you can yeah book our

counselor straight from the website or

if you've already worked with a with a

with a coach and you want to do more

work that's fine it's wonderful to spend

time with you and serve you all and I

really truly appreciate you being here

tonight this morning this afternoon I

know some of you have probably got your

I think I was listen I was watching

Tracy sent an email and was saying she

managed to clean and cook and get

everything done in the last session and

learned a whole lot um I'm glad that

you're able to do that we are here for

you always join the black SW app it's on

your Google Play or your Apple Store ask

questions be a part of the community

I'll be in there doing some lives at

some point but the rest of you have

yourselves a wonderful day thank you so

much keep tuned in we're going to have

master classes every month if almost

every month if not every month if I if I

can do it because I really want to

really really equip you they're going to

be by donation so no excuses no no

reason for anybody to be ignorant

because if no one else will do it the

black relationship Academy will make

sure that you are educated and if you're

not it would not be because you couldn't

afford it so thank you for inviting your

friends thank you for showing up thank

you for your love I love you to bits and

pieces and goodbye