why joseph solomon left (and why he didn't leave) Christianity

Summary

In this reflective video, the speaker, a former Christian influencer, candidly discusses his journey of leaving the Christian faith. He addresses common misconceptions about why people leave the faith, such as church hurt, racial divide, or seeking to indulge in sin, and clarifies these were not his reasons. The speaker emphasizes his departure was due to intellectual and existential challenges, feeling that Christianity no longer held water for him. He expresses a desire to avoid debates but is open to conversations about faith, highlighting the importance of personal intellectual honesty in his decision.

Takeaways

• 🎙️ The speaker was a popular Christian figure with a significant online following, engaging in speaking, teaching, and creating content about Jesus.
• 📢 In August of the previous year, the speaker publicly announced leaving Christianity without providing detailed reasons, leading to widespread curiosity and questions.
• 🤫 Initially, the speaker chose not to discuss their transition publicly to avoid debates and because they were still processing the change privately.
• 🤔 The speaker is now open to having conversations about faith, including Christianity and their departure from it, but is not interested in proving their stance to others.
• 🏀 An analogy is made comparing the speaker's disinterest in debates to refusing a fight in a gym, emphasizing a focus on more important personal matters.
• 🚫 The speaker refutes common misconceptions about why people leave Christianity, stating that their reasons are more nuanced and intellectual.
• 💔 The first misconception addressed is 'church hurt,' which the speaker acknowledges but clarifies was not the driving factor for their departure.
• 🌐 The second is the idea that leaving Christianity is due to racial or cultural divides, which the speaker dismisses as oversimplified and not applicable to their personal experience.
• 🚫 The third misconception is that people leave due to a desire to sin, particularly sexually, which the speaker finds to be a reductionist and disrespectful assumption.
• 🏳️‍🌈 The speaker points out the irony in the church's focus on sexual sin, especially homosexuality, as a reason for leaving, highlighting the potential for gaslighting and misinterpretation.
• 🧠 The actual reason for leaving Christianity, according to the speaker, is the intellectual untenability of the faith, with cognitive dissonance becoming too overwhelming to reconcile.
• 📚 The speaker has a deep background in apologetics and has spent over a decade seeking answers, which ultimately led to more questions and the realization that Christianity no longer aligns with their beliefs.
• 🤝 Despite leaving the faith, the speaker maintains respect for many individuals within the church and differentiates between problematic people and theological issues.
• 🌟 The speaker concludes by emphasizing the importance of personal intellectual honesty and the decision to no longer follow the Bible due to existential and intellectual reasons.

Q & A

What was the individual's role within the Christian community prior to leaving the faith?

The individual was a popular Christian speaker, poet, YouTuber, singer-songwriter, and a personality influencer with a following of hundreds of thousands on YouTube and thousands on Instagram, traveling and engaging in speaking, teaching, singing, and making poetry about Jesus.

Why did the person announce they were no longer a Christian?

The person made the announcement in August of the previous year but did not provide much context or explanation at the time, as they were not ready to start having public conversations about their transition.

What were the individual's initial reasons for not engaging in public debates about their change in faith?

The individual felt they might have been too eager to engage in debates and were on the fence about whether to engage in such discussions, ultimately deciding they were not interested in debating but rather in having conversations about faith.

How does the individual feel about being challenged or accused of leaving Christianity due to cowardice or sin?

The individual is not fazed by such accusations and compares it to choosing not to engage in a fight at a gym, stating they have better things to do and are not interested in proving their stance to others.

What are the three main misconceptions people have about why the individual left the Christian faith?

The misconceptions are that the individual left due to church hurt, the belief that Christianity is a white man's religion, and a desire to engage in sin, particularly sexual sin.

Why does the individual reject the idea that they left Christianity because of 'church hurt'?

The individual acknowledges having had unpleasant experiences in the church but clarifies that these experiences were not the ultimate reason for leaving the faith.

How does the individual address the claim that they left Christianity because it is perceived as a 'white man's religion'?

The individual understands the cultural and geographical origins of Christianity and rejects the notion that it is inherently a white man's religion, distinguishing between the religion itself and its historical misuse by certain groups.

What is the individual's response to people suggesting they left Christianity to engage in sin or due to sexual reasons?

The individual finds such suggestions annoying and unfounded, emphasizing that their departure from Christianity was not due to a desire to sin but rather an intellectual and emotional realization.

Why does the individual believe that these misconceptions belittle the intellectual capacity of those who leave Christianity?

The individual feels that these misconceptions reduce the decision to leave Christianity to emotional or sinful reasons, dismissing the intellectual and rational thought process that led to their decision.

What is the individual's general reason for leaving Christianity?

The individual states that they found Christianity to be intellectually untenable, with cognitive dissonance becoming too much to bear, and that they could no longer continue without feeling a sense of dishonesty within themselves.

How does the individual view the balance between personal freedom and moral responsibility after leaving Christianity?

The individual believes in the principle that all things are permissible but questions whether they are beneficial, suggesting a continued focus on ethical behavior even in the absence of religious doctrine.

Outlines

00:00

🎤 Reflecting on Leaving Christianity

The speaker introduces their journey of transitioning out of Christianity after being a popular Christian figure. They announce their departure from the faith and discuss their hesitance to engage in public debates about their reasons, emphasizing their preference for personal peace over public confrontation.

05:01

💔 Addressing Church Hurt

The speaker clarifies that their departure was not due to negative experiences within the church, such as betrayal or annoyance, which are common for anyone involved in a church community. They acknowledge the presence of church hurt but assert it wasn't the driving force behind their decision to leave the faith.

10:02

🌍 Misconceptions and Racial Issues

The speaker refutes the assumption that they left Christianity due to racial issues or viewing the Bible as a 'white man's religion.' They distinguish between criticizing white evangelicalism and rejecting Christianity as a whole, asserting their understanding of Christianity's historical and cultural origins.

15:03

🔍 Intellectual and Emotional Discontent

The speaker emphasizes that their decision to leave Christianity was primarily intellectual, driven by an inability to reconcile cognitive dissonance with the faith. They describe a long engagement with apologetics and the accumulation of unanswered questions that led to their departure, highlighting the importance of intellectual honesty in their decision.

Keywords

💡Transitioning

Transitioning refers to the process of changing from one state or condition to another. In the context of the video, the speaker discusses their transition out of the Christian faith, which involved a shift in their beliefs and public identity. This is a central theme as the entire narrative revolves around the journey and reasons behind this change.

💡Christian Faith

Christian Faith is the belief system based on the teachings of Jesus Christ and the Bible. The speaker used to be a prominent figure within this faith, engaging in various roles such as a speaker, poet, and musician. The video's theme heavily involves the speaker's departure from this faith and the subsequent implications.

💡Cognitive Dissonance

Cognitive Dissonance is the mental discomfort experienced by a person who holds two or more contradictory beliefs, ideas, or values. The speaker mentions this term to describe the internal conflict that led to their departure from Christianity, as they could no longer reconcile their beliefs with their intellectual understanding.

💡Debate

A debate is a formal discussion on a particular topic in which different arguments are put forward for the purpose of exploring the subject or resolving a dispute. The speaker expresses their disinterest in debating their stance on Christianity, preferring conversation over confrontation, which reflects their desire for a more respectful exchange of ideas.

💡Church Hurt

Church Hurt refers to emotional or psychological pain experienced as a result of negative events or actions within a church community. The speaker clarifies that while they have experienced church hurt, it was not the primary reason for leaving the faith, countering a common misconception about people's reasons for leaving Christianity.

💡Racial Divide

Racial Divide pertains to the social separation and tension between different racial groups. The speaker dismisses the idea that racial issues within the church or society were a factor in their decision to leave Christianity, emphasizing that their reasons were more intellectual and personal.

💡Sexual Sin

Sexual Sin, in a religious context, refers to actions or desires that are considered morally wrong according to religious teachings, often specifically related to sexual behavior. The speaker addresses a misconception that they left Christianity to engage in sexual sin without guilt or shame, which they find to be a reductionist and incorrect assumption.

💡Intellectual Tenable

Intellectual tenable means that something is defensible or reasonable when subjected to intellectual scrutiny. The speaker states that they found Christianity to be no longer intellectually tenable, indicating that their beliefs could not withstand critical examination, which was a significant factor in their departure from the faith.

💡Apologetics

Apologetics is the study of the rational defense of religious doctrines or beliefs. The speaker mentions their deep engagement with apologetics, showing their effort to reconcile their beliefs with reason, which ultimately contributed to their realization that Christianity was no longer tenable for them.

💡Existential

Existential refers to the nature of human existence, particularly the experiences and choices that define one's life. The speaker describes their decision to leave Christianity as an existential one, driven by a need to be honest with themselves and to live in alignment with their intellectual and emotional understanding.

💡Patriarchal

Patriarchal describes a social system in which men hold primary power and are dominant in roles of political leadership, moral authority, and social privilege. The speaker criticizes certain teachings within Christianity as being influenced by patriarchal structures, which they view as contributing to oppressive and regressive views on sexuality.

Highlights

The speaker reflects on transitioning out of Christian faith after being a popular Christian influencer.

Gained a significant following of hundreds of thousands on YouTube and thousands on Instagram while traveling and speaking about Jesus.

In August of the previous year, the speaker announced they were no longer a Christian, without providing much context initially.

The speaker was hesitant to engage in public debates about their departure from Christianity.

The speaker shares a story about choosing not to engage in a physical fight, drawing a parallel to their approach to debates about faith.

Clarifies that leaving Christianity was not due to church hurt, racial divides, or a desire to sin, which are common assumptions made by others.

Describes unpleasant experiences in the church but emphasizes that these were not the reasons for leaving the faith.

Rejects the notion that Christianity is inherently a white man's religion.

Addresses assumptions about leaving Christianity to engage in sexual sin, including speculations about their sexuality.

The speaker emphasizes their departure was due to intellectual and existential reasons, not personal grievances or sin.

Mentions a deep engagement in apologetics since around 2009-2010, leading to more questions than answers.

The speaker critiques the tendency of some Christians to belittle the intellectual capacity of those who leave the faith.

Expresses that the cognitive dissonance in maintaining Christian beliefs became too overwhelming.

Highlights that despite their departure, they still respect and maintain relationships with past church leaders.

Concludes that their decision to leave Christianity was about seeking intellectual honesty and addressing existential concerns.

Transcripts

turn that preamp up

yo what's going on family welcome back

to I just

the shore somewhere over here I guess we

can call it that man just me processing

my experience of transitioning out of

Christian faith after being a somewhat

popular Christian speaker poet YouTuber

singer songwriter you name it just

personality influencer

uh gained attraction gained a following

of a couple of a couple hundred thousand

on YouTube and you know thousands on

Instagram traveling the country in the

world speaking and teaching and singing

and making poetry about Jesus and

last year in August I made an

announcement

that I was no longer a Christian and I

didn't give much context or explanation

as to why and that has been the the

question that people have been asking

well why why why why and I've kind of

held my cars close to my chest for a

while

namely because I was ready to transition

out of that space publicly let people

know but I wasn't ready to start having

conversation about that publicly

um

I think that my position

at the time

you know I think I would have been too

eager to engage in debates with people

or I was kind of on the fence about

whether or not I engaged in debate and I

don't I'm just not interested in that I

just don't want to debate I don't

I've come to the space where I'm willing

to have conversations

about faith and you know Christian faith

and lack of but I'm just not

I'm not in a space where I

feel the need to prove where I'm at some

people may see that as a cop-out

you know especially you know people in

my comment section and stuff sometimes

like you know

they see it as cowardly

and

it's kind of like

you know I remember one time I was in LA

Fitness playing basketball and for

whatever Petty reason this dude wanted

to fight me I'm a grown man I'm I got a

career going on I make videos and stuff

for a living and this dude wanted to

fight

and I was like no I'm cool bro

I'm like I'm good I wasn't like there

was no fear in me I wasn't scared I was

like as calm as can be I was just like

nah I'm good

and you know some people would see that

as a you know being scared or cowardly

move was like nah bro I I got stuff to

do like I got

you ain't got to go to work tomorrow

we you know we can get arrested or

whatever kicked out lose membership here

I got stuff to do bro I just got better

things to do than fight

he was pretty swole I'm not gonna lie it

was I I probably would have lost that

fight but I wasn't scared I genuinely I

just was like I got better things to do

that's kind of how I feel oftentimes

with this whole like

you know the conversation around

Christianity in the Bible was like I'll

have the conversation but if we're if

there's going to be like some like well

prove to me why you and if you don't

prove to me then

you know you're doing yourself and

people listen to your disservice or

you're being cowardly as a cop-out it's

like I just don't I don't care

I just got I have better emotional

things to to process than that so

anyways let's talk about

why I left the faith which is a very

it's a very complicated but I think I

can make it very very simple

instead of going down the rabbit hole

maybe I'll just take time going down the

rabbit hole as I continue to make these

videos and as I start up the podcast

again

but let's first talk about why I didn't

leave the faith

because

I there are three main reasons why

people have been assuming that I left

Christian faith and not just on me but

on many people I've seen videos on Tick

Tock and YouTube tweets all these

different posts

uh not about me specifically but just in

general about people leaving the faith

and there's this need for Christians

many Christians not all Christians but

many Christians to try to do away with

the gray or to try to

build some straw man argument up and

then tear it down and this conversation

makes other Christians feel good but it

doesn't actually Explain real

experiences of people who left the

Christian faith and so if you're not

actually concerned with why people want

to leave Christian faith then

cool but don't go and make up reasons

why and maybe these reasons are true for

some people but

for a lot of people especially for me

it's just not true one

people assume that you left because of

church hurt

uh he left because you know he felt the

pain of people uh

uh I don't know something make up I

don't know I I don't know where they got

that from have I had unpleasant

experiences in the church absolutely who

has not

been offended

been betrayed

been annoyed

by people in the church whether they're

just common church goers or church

leadership everyone has experienced if

you've been in the church any length of

time that's just life people are going

to hurt you so if you spend most of your

life in the church

you're going to have church hurt

like in some people's Church hurt is

more traumatic than others

but everyone has searched hurt so yeah

have I had unpleasant experiences yeah

but

it's not the people per se uh

uh or the experiences of me people

treating me badly or me having you know

losing faith in people or whatever all

those things happened

uh and I'm sure I've been the cause of

someone's Church hurt at some point and

none of those things it's not the

ultimate reason why I left

um the third the second reason third

second reason that people

throw out is that you know oh he left

because he he's got caught up in the

whole idea that

uh probably that that that the Bible is

The White Man's religion

and I'm going to show the common thread

in all three of these reasons that after

I give all three of them which I think

is is very interesting the second yeah

the second reason is that people think

that I left because of

you know because of the racial divide

within the the cultural Wars within the

church and within the country and and

you know I just I don't know I felt

betrayed by white evangelicalism and

blah blah blah and I'm like

I have a lot of problems with white

evangelicalism

um but I know how to separate the two I

understand that the Bible

Jesus Christianity is not inherently a

white man's religion this is

I even have to say this as if I'm saying

I'm not saying anything deep or uh hard

to find or something like oh wow he went

to Seminary to find out that Jesus

and Christianity started in the Middle

East

and then Europeans got a hold of it and

was like um

we could do some real damage with this

no that's not that's not why I left uh

three which is

has a spectrum

but people think it's because and

they'll attribute it to a lot of people

they think that I left and many people

leave Christianity because they want to

go in sin they just they just they

couldn't they couldn't bear the weight

of their sin anymore and they want to go

out

and sin specifically sexual sin I don't

know why that's like the thing like

everyone is like yo they want to go out

and have sex Guiltless Shameless sex

Christians

ironically as

as pure as Christians want to be they

Christians can be very hyper focused on

sex

um and so

for whatever reason they're like oh he's

he wants to go out and have sex and and

particularly this is what's kind of

thrown me off which has been wild it's I

will say this is a minority opinion this

is not a lot of people but it has popped

up and it's been really interesting I

remember when I first announced that I

wasn't a Christian I went on IG live and

there were a couple of comments

um suggesting like oh next thing you

know he's going to come out is gay

and I don't even know why I'm even

giving this a voice but I just saw

another comment recently of someone

suggesting the same thing and this is

kind of spouted up a few things you know

a few times here and there

um

I think at this point because I don't

feel I owe anything to the church

and I feel so free in what I am right

now and where I'm at my life right now

like

if I was gay

cool uh

two I would have told y'all a long time

ago like it would have been pretty

evident like it's not like I'm holding

my cards close to my chest

um and it's this like

it's the it's the weirdest gaslighting

cycle that you can get caught up into

because then if you act surprised by the

accusation they're like oh I'm sorry to

trigger you see uh he got real defensive

about it it's like no it's just annoying

that someone would project onto your

sexuality with literally no evidence

it's just the weirdest thing but I think

again it falls under the greater

umbrella that Christians

oftentimes

they want to explain your your exit by

saying there's some sort of sin some

sort of Scandal some sexual Scandal if

they're not used to people just leaving

on good terms or just peaceful terms

it's like oh it had to be some sort of

some sort of uh struggling some sexual

struggling within himself

um

and then the worst kind of sexual

struggling to Christians the the

homosexual kind

I don't get it

um but what all three of these things

have in common

is that

they all sort of belittle the

intellectual capacity of people when

they leave Christianity

in the first reason being a very

emotional one

oh they left because of church hurt

rather than no I just

which kind of alludes to the reason why

I left very generally I just don't find

Christianity

intellectually tenable I I if the

cognitive dissonance

became too much to try to hold together

in my mind uh to fight away

it just doesn't it just doesn't hold

water to me and I won't go into

specifics there's not just one thing

that I'm like oh I can't get with it

it's many things and mind you I have

my I have been studying apologetics

um

casually at first but then very very

deeply

uh for you know since like 2000 I think

9 2010 was the first time I read it

somewhere around that time so over 10

years

that have been deeply engaged in

apologetics

um and you know the more

questions I had I sought for answers and

the more answers I got the more

questions I had

and

um

it's just

it just doesn't the idea of it just

doesn't hold water to me you know like I

said maybe another video we can there's

so many different areas that we can just

have a whole hour-long conversation

around it

um

and so my reason for leaving in

Christianity was very was very much an

emotional one because I mean I'm an

emotional person we're all emotional

beings and I had a lot of emotions tied

up in my Christian experience but very

much uh uh an intellectual

uh bout as well

and so I think the thing that I guess

was most annoying or offensive about

these reasons that people want to

project is like

they all dismissed

someone's intellectual capacity to be to

make a a logical and rational decision

for themselves like oh

it's because they were they were Church

hurt they so they blamed it on Jesus

because their pastor had some sort of

Scandal or whatever it's like no like

for the most part I found myself in

churches that had really

for the most part everyone's broken

everyone's messed up I can I can go

through complaints about all the pastors

that I've had at some point because

they're humans now I understand that

um but

uh you know my childhood Pastor I I you

know he passed away a few years ago I

have so much respect and reverence for

him as a human being

um it's one of the most influential

people in my life uh and it hurt me to

the core when he passed away

um and I still uh look up to him as a

hero in my life and a hero for my family

my most two recent uh pastors I'm still

in contact with one of them I'm still

you know really friends with them you

know and still I just was talking to one

of them this week like we still

communicate like I have reverence and

respect for them as a human being

um

so yeah there's you know bad leadership

throughout the church globally

nationally but uh there's a lot of

really good people in the church and

I know how to differentiate

uh bad people and theology you know

um

and then for the whole like you know

Christianity is The White Man's religion

and

it dismisses the the idea it dismisses

the capacity of someone to be like no I

understand that I understand how the

Bible came to be I understand how

Christianity came to be

um I understand it in its cultural

context

uh as much as I

you know tried and learn I don't think

we'll ever fully understand but you know

for the most part generally understand

how Christianity came about culturally

uh and geographically and I still reject

it

I still reject it was that

uh and then the last one being like

because of some sexual sin it's like oh

he has some inner turmoil

and it's like no it can't just be

because people just don't think it's

true

I just don't think it's true have that

conversation but it's very it's gas like

someone

when they're like well I know you say

it's an intellectual but really it's a

it's a sin issue and I guess you know

depending on your theology in your

doctrine of sin you could say that

um anything that's in opposition to the

god of the Bible is sin not just sexual

sin but any so I guess in that sense I

guess you could say like it's because I

wanted to go sin I don't know

um but I know what people generally mean

when they say that there's like some

like

uh they you know we want to go and live

uh

what's what's interesting about that is

that many of the

you know many of the morals and

standards in the way that I see uh

ethics in life uh and particularly

sexuality maybe I make a video about

that another day

um many of them I've let go of course I

think a lot of it a lot of uh Doctrine

and teaching around sexuality within uh

Christianity

is extremely uh regressive oppressive

um arbitrary

and perpetuated by

patriarchal

uh leadership you know so

but at the same time there's

good bits of it and sort of uh Concepts

and ideas of it that I I still kind of

get with I'll make a video about it one

day but I you know I had to come around

to it in a back-end way

um but there are still good bits of it

that I see as a as a it's a good way to

carry yourself

so

uh it you know kind of comes down to

kind of what Paul was said like all

things are permissible I it's actually

all things are permissible all things

you just do what you want to do you can

do what you want to do

um but is it beneficial to you

that's the question is it actually good

for you to do that even though you are

free to do it

so

um

that's the irony of it I think

um

but

uh

yeah the general eyed reason is you know

existentially and intellectually could

not

continue

without feeling a strong sense of

dishonesty Within Myself about following

the Bible it

um

and for years try to keep connecting the

dots

uh

but at some point

it's like

there's a thin line between faith and

willfully acting in ignorance

it's like yo is this Faith or are you

just choosing to ignore

um

what you experience and what you know

and what you what you've learned and how

you process things and you know everyone

processes differently and y'all are

gonna come some people are going to come

to wildly different conclusions than I

have

and

and that's cool

but as for me in my house

I could no longer

move in that direction so

that's it that's

pretty much it I could make this video

longer but I think I'd just be rambling

at that point uh and kind of nitpicking

at certain things but

that's the why and why I didn't

leave Christianity