The secret of destiny: Yahya Bakkar at TEDxHoboken

Summary

In a heartfelt and emotional letter, Yaya Bakar shares his journey of reconnecting with his estranged mother after 24 years of separation. Born in Mecca, Saudi Arabia, Yaya's search for his mother, who had been living in Thailand, led him to a miraculous reunion facilitated by a Thai TV show. Through this experience, Yaya explores the power of love, healing, and self-acceptance, uncovering profound truths about destiny and the layers of fear and pain that keep us from embracing unconditional love. His story highlights the importance of peeling back these layers to find our true purpose in life.

Takeaways

• 😀 Writing the letter was a life-changing experience, driven by a deep desire to reconnect with a lost mother.
• 😀 Yaya was born in Mecca, Saudi Arabia, and raised by his father after his parents' divorce when he was just a few months old.
• 😀 Yaya had no memory of his mother, and his only connection to her was a picture and a few pieces of information from his father.
• 😀 The primary goal of writing the letter was to express gratitude to his mother and to seek closure after 24 years of separation.
• 😀 Yaya’s letter went viral and reached a Thai TV host whose show specializes in reuniting lost family members.
• 😀 A week after writing the letter, Yaya received a life-altering call at 2:34 AM from his mother, who revealed herself to be alive.
• 😀 The emotional reunion was captured on national TV in Thailand, where Yaya surprised his mother after years of separation.
• 😀 During their reunion, Yaya’s mother shared a profound message: ‘Love is the secret of Destiny,’ which inspired Yaya to reflect deeply on the meaning of destiny and purpose.
• 😀 The word ‘destiny’ comes from Latin, meaning to stand completely in one’s purpose, and Yaya connected this to the idea that love is central to fulfilling one's purpose in life.
• 😀 Yaya learned that writing his truth, even through pain, helped him heal and understand the importance of love and self-acceptance.
• 😀 The script emphasizes the importance of shedding the layers of fear, insecurities, and lies that prevent us from experiencing love fully.
• 😀 Yaya concludes with a powerful message: to truly live our destiny, we must let go of lies about love, accept our worth, and embrace love as our guiding force.

Q & A

Why did Yaya decide to write a letter in January 2013?

Yaya decided to write the letter because he wanted to put the missing pieces of his life back together and find his biological mother, whom he had been separated from since infancy. The letter was an emotional attempt to reach out and express his feelings of love and gratitude despite their long separation.

What was Yaya’s primary goal in writing the letter?

Yaya's primary goal was to find his biological mother to express his gratitude and love. He wanted to thank her for carrying him for nine months and enduring the pain of childbirth, as well as to let her know that he had always loved her, despite their separation.

How did Yaya initially try to find his mother?

Yaya tried to find his mother by asking for help online to translate his letter into Thai, which led to him being connected with a lady who had a brother involved in a TV show in Thailand known for reuniting separated families.

What role did the Thai TV show play in Yaya’s journey?

The Thai TV show played a pivotal role by offering to help Yaya reunite with his mother. The show had a history of reuniting long-separated family members, which ultimately facilitated Yaya’s successful search for his mother.

What was the moment when Yaya first spoke to his mother like?

When Yaya first spoke to his mother, it was an overwhelming and surreal moment. He couldn’t believe it was real, but upon realizing he was talking to her, he expressed his love and affection, and she reciprocated with a heartfelt 'I love you too, my son.'

How did Yaya’s reunion with his mother unfold on national TV?

Yaya’s reunion with his mother was staged as a surprise on national TV in Thailand. Dressed as a bartender, he approached his mother while she was engaged in conversation with the TV host. When he greeted her with 'Hi, Mom,' it triggered a powerful emotional reaction, and they embraced with tears of joy.

What profound statement did Yaya’s mother make at the airport?

At the airport, before Yaya’s departure to America, his mother told him, 'It was Destiny for us to meet and love is the secret of Destiny.' This statement deeply impacted Yaya, prompting him to reflect on the concept of destiny and love.

What is the connection between the word 'Destiny' and Yaya’s personal experience?

Yaya connected the word 'Destiny' to his personal journey after researching its Latin roots. He learned that 'Destiny' comes from the words 'destinare' (to completely stand) and 'destinatio' (purpose), leading him to realize that his purpose in life was to find his mother and to embrace love as the key to fulfilling his destiny.

What emotional struggles did Yaya face when writing the letter?

Yaya struggled with the emotional weight of expressing 24 years of pain, anger, fear, and confusion about his mother’s absence. He went through several drafts of the letter, repeatedly writing and deleting, as he tried to confront and release the layers of fear, shame, and unresolved feelings that had built up over the years.

What message does Yaya share about love and its role in life?

Yaya shares that love is always present, and that the real obstacle to experiencing love is the layers of lies and misconceptions we build up over time. He emphasizes that love is not something to be proven or earned, but is inherent in our existence, and that the key to living a fulfilling life is to peel away these layers and embrace love.