Can You Be Religious And Queer? | them.

them
3 May 201806:55

Summary

TLDRThe script explores the intersection of faith, queerness, and identity through personal narratives. It features individuals from various religious backgrounds—Catholic, Muslim, and Jewish—who embrace their LGBTQ+ identities while maintaining strong ties to their faiths. They share their experiences of finding acceptance and peace within their spiritual communities, challenging traditional views on sexuality and religion. The script highlights the power of individuality, the importance of self-acceptance, and the revolutionary act of queer individuals praying and expressing their faith authentically.

Takeaways

  • 🌈 The speaker identifies as a queer individual who finds strength and identity in both their faith and their queerness.
  • 🙏 The individual's church community played a significant role in their acceptance and coming out as a gay man.
  • 🎭 The speaker expresses their spirituality and sexuality through various forms of art, such as drag and theater.
  • 🔄 The speaker challenges the traditional binary views of right and wrong, suggesting a more nuanced understanding of faith and identity.
  • 🌟 The individual believes in a loving God who accepts them for who they are, including their sexuality.
  • 🏛 Raised Catholic, the speaker values the Sunday tradition and the sense of community it provides.
  • 🕌 The speaker also identifies with Islam, having grown up in an Afghan community, and finds ways to practice within a busy life.
  • 🤔 The speaker questions the expectations placed upon them by their religious and cultural backgrounds, seeking personal authenticity.
  • 🏳️‍🌈 The individual's queerness and faith coexist, and they do not see a conflict between believing in God and being queer.
  • 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 The speaker's family is supportive of their identity, although societal expectations can still create tension.
  • 💅 The speaker uses their platform to advocate for acceptance and understanding of the LGBT community within religious contexts.

Q & A

  • How does the speaker's religious faith influence their identity as a drag queen?

    -The speaker's religious faith in Jesus and their Catholic upbringing has a significant influence on their identity as a drag queen. They believe that Jesus loves them for who they are, including their queerness, and that their faith gives them the strength to express themselves authentically.

  • What was the speaker's experience growing up in a Catholic environment?

    -The speaker grew up in a Catholic environment that was more about lifting themselves and others up. This upbringing provided a sense of peace and centeredness, which was beneficial for their personal growth and acceptance of their identity.

  • How does the speaker's Afghan background influence their religious and cultural identity?

    -The speaker's Afghan background, coming from a close-knit community in Queens, has allowed them to have a strong affinity for Islam. They find that combining their cultural and religious identities has been beneficial, as it provides a more nuanced understanding of their faith.

  • What is the speaker's perspective on the relationship between spirituality and sexuality?

    -The speaker views spirituality and sexuality as interconnected. They believe in God and feel loved by Jesus not in spite of, but because of their sexuality, suggesting a harmonious relationship between their spiritual beliefs and their sexual identity.

  • How does the speaker navigate their identity as a queer Muslim?

    -The speaker navigates their identity as a queer Muslim by finding personal ways to practice their faith, such as using their tesba (Muslim rosaries) on the subway for meditation and remembering God. They also challenge the notion that their identity should be 'extra hard' by asserting that being queer, a woman, or gender non-conforming is inherently challenging in the world.

  • What was the speaker's experience growing up in an ultra-Orthodox community?

    -The speaker grew up in an ultra-Orthodox community where there were many rules and expectations about their role in society. They felt constrained by these expectations and found that their individuality and passion for life did not fit within the community's norms.

  • How did the speaker's family react to their coming out?

    -The speaker's family was very supportive when they came out. It is suggested that they knew about the speaker's sexuality before the speaker did. However, there were still challenges due to the expectations of each other and the speaker's more outspoken nature.

  • What is the speaker's view on the relationship between Catholicism and the LGBT community?

    -The speaker believes that Catholicism is fundamentally about love and that congregations that exclude the LGBT community are misinterpreting the Bible. They participate in Pride marches with members of their church, indicating a belief in the compatibility of faith and sexual identity.

  • How does the speaker feel about the societal acceptance of queerness compared to Muslims and immigrants?

    -The speaker feels that society spends more time normalizing queerness and LGBT identity than it does accepting Muslims and immigrants. They find that their queerness makes them more palatable and safe in the eyes of others, which is a complex dynamic given their Muslim identity.

  • What does the speaker do to express their love for acting and queerness?

    -The speaker engages in Yiddish theater and drag comedy, allowing them to express their queerness and love for acting. They find it particularly meaningful to perform as a queer woman in Yiddish, combining their cultural, religious, and sexual identities.

  • How does the speaker reconcile their religious beliefs with their queerness in their performances?

    -The speaker sees their performances, especially in drag, as a way to express their beauty and thank God for who they are. They view their queerness as a part of their identity that is loved by God and does not conflict with their faith.

Outlines

00:00

🌈 Embracing Faith and Queer Identity

This paragraph explores the intersection of spirituality and queerness, highlighting the speaker's journey as a gay man who finds solace and affirmation in his faith. Raised Catholic, the individual credits his church for providing a supportive environment that nurtured his identity without suppressing his queerness. The narrative touches on the struggle with societal norms and the fear of God instilled during upbringing, contrasting it with a personal understanding of a loving God who accepts him as he is. The speaker also reflects on the importance of Sunday traditions and the peace it brings, as well as the cultural and religious identity fusion experienced as an Afghan immigrant in the United States. The paragraph concludes with a call for acceptance and love, emphasizing that belief in God does not conflict with being part of the LGBT community.

05:02

📿 Balancing Religion and Personal Truths

The second paragraph delves into the complexities of reconciling religious beliefs with personal truths, particularly for those who identify as queer and religious. The speaker discusses the challenges of growing up in an ultra-Orthodox community where individuality was often overshadowed by communal expectations. Despite the pressure to conform, the speaker found personal fulfillment in pursuing a life that aligns with their passions, including the desire to be a mother. The narrative also touches on the support received from family upon coming out and the ongoing struggle with societal and religious expectations. The speaker advocates for a broader understanding of religion that includes love and acceptance, rather than exclusion based on cherry-picked interpretations of religious texts. The paragraph ends with a reflection on the transformative power of faith and the potential for change in societal attitudes towards the LGBT community.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Drag Queen

A drag queen is a person, usually male, who performs in a stylized and exaggerated version of femininity, often for entertainment purposes. In the video, the speaker identifies as a drag queen and discusses how their faith in Jesus and participation in the church community coexists with their identity as a gay man, highlighting the theme of intersectionality and acceptance.

💡Queer Muslims

Queer Muslims refers to individuals who identify as both Muslim and as part of the LGBTQ+ community. The video script mentions the power of praying alongside queer Muslims, emphasizing the importance of religious and sexual identity coexistence and challenging the notion that one must choose between faith and sexuality.

💡Interconnected

The term interconnected highlights the idea that different aspects of a person's identity are linked and influence each other. In the context of the video, the speaker discusses how spirituality and sexuality are interconnected, suggesting that their religious beliefs and sexual orientation are not separate but are part of a whole identity.

💡Catholicism

Catholicism is a branch of Christianity that is part of the Roman Catholic Church. The speaker mentions being raised Catholic and how the Sunday tradition provides peace and a sense of community. The video uses Catholicism as an example of a religious institution that can be inclusive and supportive of LGBTQ+ individuals.

💡Afghan Community

The Afghan community mentioned in the script refers to the close-knit social network of Afghan immigrants living in Queens, New York. The speaker benefits from the cultural and religious identity provided by this community, which plays a significant role in their understanding of Islam and its intersection with their queer identity.

💡Ultra Orthodox

Ultra Orthodox refers to a strict and conservative branch of a religious group, in this case, the Satmer community. The speaker describes the expectations and rules within this community and how their individuality and queerness were at odds with the community's norms, leading to a personal conflict.

💡LGBT Community

The LGBT community is an acronym for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender individuals. The video script discusses the importance of the LGBT community in the speaker's life and their participation in Pride marches, indicating a strong connection between their sexual identity and social activism.

💡Queer Identity

Queer identity refers to a person's self-identification with a non-heteronormative sexual or gender orientation. The speaker's queer identity is central to the video's narrative, as they explore the complexities of being queer within different religious contexts and the societal acceptance of queerness.

💡Yiddish Theater

Yiddish theater is a form of theater that uses the Yiddish language, traditionally associated with Ashkenazi Jews. The speaker mentions performing in a Yiddish theater play with a lesbian love story, showcasing their ability to express their queer identity through art and culture.

💡Drag Comedy

Drag comedy is a form of comedy performance that involves dressing in drag, or performing exaggerated gender roles for humor. The speaker identifies as a drag queen and discusses doing drag comedy, which allows them to express their creativity and queerness while also engaging with their audience.

💡Acceptance

Acceptance in the video refers to the process of recognizing and embracing someone's identity without judgment. The speaker reflects on their experiences with acceptance, noting that while they have been accepted for who they are, they have not always felt that their identity was considered 'good' by others.

Highlights

A drag queen's love for Jesus and the power of praying alongside queer Muslims.

The speaker's identity as a gay man, influenced by their church and faith in Jesus.

The interconnection of spirituality and sexuality in the speaker's life.

Growing up Catholic and the importance of Sunday church tradition for peace and community.

The speaker's Afghan background and the benefits of combining cultural and religious identities.

The diversity of Islamic practices and the personal ways of connecting with faith.

The challenge of being both Muslim and queer and the misconceptions faced.

Growing up in an ultra-Orthodox community and the struggle with individuality and community expectations.

The speaker's passion for motherhood and the conflict with traditional gender roles.

A personal revelation of being gay and the acceptance from the speaker's family.

The speaker's perspective on Catholicism's message of love versus exclusionary practices.

The annual participation in New York City Pride with church members.

The speaker's belief in God's creation of their sexual orientation and the desire for easier acceptance by parents.

The paradox of being a queer Muslim and the societal perceptions that come with it.

The speaker's experience of queerness making them more palatable in society than their immigrant parents.

The importance of cultural modesty when returning to the family and the speaker's negotiation with their identity.

The acceptance of the speaker's father towards their dating life and the contrast with religious expectations.

The speaker's reflections on the slow progress of religious institutions in accepting queerness and their hopeful outlook.

The revolutionary act of a queer Muslim praying and the affirmation of existence despite societal norms.

The speaker's involvement in Yiddish theater and the joy of expressing queer love in performance.

The speaker's drag comedy and the connection between performing and thanking God for their abilities.

Transcripts

play00:00

you can be a drag queen that loves Jesus

play00:03

to pray alongside a queer Muslims there

play00:05

is so much power there I feel very

play00:07

Jewish very queer very human

play00:10

[Music]

play00:15

it would not have come out as a gay man

play00:17

if it weren't for my church I would not

play00:21

go walking through the streets and make

play00:23

up and in drag if it weren't

play00:26

for my faith in Jesus

play00:29

I was put into this world and this

play00:31

community of things like black and white

play00:32

this is right and this is wrong

play00:34

fear of God was put in me but actual God

play00:37

wasn't a boogeyman

play00:40

I did ask God to make me a blonde thin

play00:43

white girl

play00:44

but I never asked him to take away my

play00:46

queerness

play00:54

spirituality and sexuality are very

play00:56

interconnected

play00:58

I believe in God I believe that Jesus

play01:00

Loves Me because I'm gay not in spite of

play01:03

my sexuality

play01:06

I was raised Catholic and as far back as

play01:10

I can remember we went to church this

play01:12

Sunday tradition centers me it gives me

play01:14

peace to go throughout my week this is

play01:17

the one place I know my lines you know I

play01:20

felt fortunate enough to grow up in a

play01:22

church that was much more about lifting

play01:24

myself and others around me up

play01:27

growing up

play01:31

came to the United States from

play01:32

Afghanistan and had a very close-knit

play01:34

Afghan community in Queens there's been

play01:37

a benefit for me to collapse cultural

play01:39

and religious identities because without

play01:42

having the two of them together I

play01:44

wouldn't have had such a strong affinity

play01:47

for Islam

play01:48

there's no singular narrative on how

play01:51

Islam looks and how it's done right some

play01:54

days my call to prayer goes off of my

play01:56

phone and I say a prayer in my head and

play01:58

some days it's just using my tesba or my

play02:01

Muslim rosaries on the subway to

play02:03

meditate and remember God

play02:06

when I tell people that I'm Muslim and

play02:08

queer there's always this question that

play02:10

comes up in queer circles oh that must

play02:12

be so hard

play02:14

it's hard for any of us to be queer or

play02:16

women or of gender non-conforming in

play02:18

this world

play02:19

why is my identity as a Muslim extra

play02:22

hard than anybody else's identity

play02:26

I grew up in an ultra Orthodox community

play02:28

in this SEC called satmer there's a lot

play02:31

of rules everything is about the

play02:33

community

play02:34

I'm very much an individual

play02:36

I have to be greater and larger and then

play02:38

I can add to the world and over there I

play02:41

couldn't do that

play02:43

it's a little hard to explain what I was

play02:44

expected to be because

play02:46

you're supposed to be passionate but

play02:48

passionate about God I'm passionate

play02:49

about wanting to be a mom so I was never

play02:51

told to be small but I was told that I

play02:54

had a role to play

play02:57

matchmakers are are real and I was 19

play03:01

almost 20 and I get married

play03:03

I tried to make it make sense for me

play03:06

it never fit it never felt like it fit

play03:08

first time I had a date with a woman and

play03:10

we kissed on that date I knew what to do

play03:12

and it made sense

play03:14

and then I didn't have the question

play03:17

my family was very supportive of me

play03:20

coming out I think they definitely knew

play03:22

before I did

play03:24

but because we're human and we have

play03:26

expectations of each other it still can

play03:29

be tough because I am a little bit more

play03:31

outspoken and because I'm doing this

play03:33

interview with nail polish on

play03:37

Catholicism is about love

play03:40

and congregations that excommunicate the

play03:43

LGBT community are cherry-picking the

play03:46

Bible for hate

play03:49

I March every year in New York City

play03:51

Pride with members of my church

play03:53

believing in God and believing in Jesus

play03:56

do not have to conflict

play03:58

[Music]

play04:00

I didn't ever ask God to change my

play04:03

sexual orientation

play04:04

because it felt exciting I knew God made

play04:08

me the way I was meant to be I just wish

play04:10

God would make it easier for

play04:13

my parents

play04:14

the funny thing is as a queer Muslim in

play04:18

this country

play04:19

my queerness gives me access to a

play04:22

Humanity that my parents do not have

play04:26

I'm more palatable than they are

play04:28

I don't know it's because my queerness

play04:31

subverts Islam and as a result makes my

play04:34

Islam safer for people

play04:37

we spent so much more time in this

play04:39

country normalizing queerness and LGBT

play04:43

identity then Muslims and immigrants

play04:50

when I go back to my family I'll wear a

play04:53

skirt I'll cover my elbows and

play04:55

collarbone because those are very sexy

play04:57

parts of a woman's body

play05:00

um with my Dad we talked about

play05:02

gay people

play05:03

so nervous to tell him he's like I'm

play05:06

dating this woman and he's just like

play05:08

okay and and I was like and like what's

play05:10

your what and to him it was I was

play05:13

religious so I'm not following the rules

play05:15

anyway

play05:16

he's like do I like it no do I accept it

play05:17

yes

play05:19

I don't think I've ever had total

play05:21

Acceptance in my life

play05:23

I've had acceptance of this is who you

play05:25

are

play05:26

I haven't had it's good Who You Are

play05:31

religion is an institution and the study

play05:33

of human sexuality is

play05:36

so small in comparison to the history of

play05:38

the church that I recognize it's not

play05:41

going to catch up in my lifetime to

play05:43

where I'm at as a gay man

play05:47

but who knows maybe the world will

play05:49

surprise me

play05:51

religion and faith is the reason that

play05:56

we're told you can't be gay or you can't

play05:58

be queer or that your gender identity is

play06:00

not allowed for many of us

play06:02

and so a queer person or a queer Muslim

play06:05

praying

play06:06

I think is actually pretty revolutionary

play06:08

even if everyone says you're not

play06:10

supposed to be that person you know what

play06:11

you exist I do Yiddish theater

play06:14

and I did this play and it was like a

play06:16

lesbian love story and be able to

play06:19

do something I love which is act play a

play06:22

queer woman which I am

play06:24

and to say all these loving things and

play06:27

sexual things to this woman in Yiddish

play06:30

is really amazing the things that I was

play06:32

able to express that brought together

play06:33

all these

play06:35

things in my life I do drag comedy I'm

play06:37

an outspoken Catholic

play06:40

when I put on my face for a performance

play06:42

I'm doing so to make myself look as

play06:45

beautiful as possible

play06:48

that's another moment I thank God

play06:53

thank you

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Related Tags
Faith and QueerReligious IdentityCultural IntersectionLGBT AcceptanceSpiritualityQueer MuslimCatholic InclusionDrag QueenPersonal NarrativeYiddish Theater