watch this if you’re struggling with low confidence and social anxiety.

Summary

In this video, the speaker reflects on their journey from lacking confidence to developing self-trust and overcoming social anxiety. They emphasize that true confidence comes from within, not from material possessions or external validation. Confidence is built through action, embracing mistakes, and learning from discomfort. The speaker shares how they faced their fears, made mistakes in relationships, and turned pain into purpose, eventually writing a book. They encourage viewers to trust themselves, embrace imperfections, and see failure as an opportunity for growth, leading to real confidence that cannot be taken away.

Takeaways

• 😀 Confidence is not something external that can be taken away—it's an inner trust that comes from within.
• 😀 Material possessions, like expensive handbags or cars, do not define true confidence; they may be used to compensate for insecurities.
• 😀 Confidence grows from the consistency of showing up and putting in the effort, not from the end result or achievements.
• 😀 Mistakes are a crucial part of confidence. The willingness to fail and learn from failure leads to personal growth.
• 😀 True confidence comes from within and is innate, not dependent on external validation or success.
• 😀 Life is messy, and perfection is not realistic. Embrace imperfection and see mistakes as opportunities for growth.
• 😀 The school system encourages perfection, but life doesn't work that way. Real confidence is developed through trial, error, and learning from experiences.
• 😀 Confidence can be developed by taking action. Thinking and analyzing too much won't lead to growth—it's doing that makes the difference.
• 😀 Emotional discomfort, like rejection or failure, is a natural part of life and can be used to strengthen confidence when faced head-on.
• 😀 Turning pain into purpose, such as through creative outlets like writing, is a powerful way to build confidence and resilience.

Q & A

What does the speaker identify as a major factor that impacts confidence?

The speaker identifies trust, particularly self-trust, as the key factor that impacts confidence. Confidence comes from the ability to trust oneself, especially when faced with challenges and mistakes.

How does the speaker differentiate between true confidence and the superficial confidence based on material possessions?

The speaker argues that true confidence cannot be taken away from you, unlike confidence based on material possessions. If you rely on things like expensive handbags, cars, or homes to feel confident, it's not genuine confidence, but rather a way of compensating for insecurities.

What personal experiences did the speaker share about their struggles with confidence?

The speaker shares their past struggles with low confidence, social anxiety, and severe acne. They also recount feeling unattractive and lacking self-worth, which contributed to their search for true confidence.

How does the speaker suggest we build true confidence?

True confidence is built through consistent effort, showing up, and making mistakes. The speaker emphasizes that confidence comes from doing the work and facing challenges, not from seeking perfection or relying on external validation.

What role do mistakes play in building confidence, according to the speaker?

Mistakes are crucial for building confidence, as they provide opportunities for growth. The speaker explains that the willingness to make mistakes, whether in relationships or other aspects of life, allows you to learn and build self-trust, which is essential for confidence.

What is the significance of the speaker's experience with public speaking?

The speaker highlights public speaking as a significant fear and demonstrates how overcoming this fear helped them build confidence. Their personal experience of failing in public speaking and learning from it allowed them to understand what true confidence is.

How does the speaker view the educational system in terms of building confidence?

The speaker criticizes the educational system for promoting perfection, which can hinder the development of true confidence. They mention how schools reward correct answers, but life is more about trial, error, and learning from mistakes, not always being perfect.

What advice does the speaker give for dealing with social anxiety and building confidence on camera?

The speaker advises doing something uncomfortable to build confidence, such as doing live videos on social media. They share their personal experience of doing 200 live Facebook videos to overcome their fear and build confidence in front of the camera.

What does the speaker mean by turning pain into purpose?

The speaker explains that when facing emotional pain, such as from relationship failures, it can be transformed into something meaningful, like creating art or writing a book. This process of alchemizing pain into purpose can contribute to building confidence and resilience.

What is the speaker's perspective on failure and how does it relate to confidence?

The speaker views failure as an essential part of growth. They believe that confidence is built by facing failure and using it as a stepping stone for progress. Rather than avoiding mistakes, embracing them helps you develop the self-trust and resilience needed for true confidence.