The one habit that is changing my life, set systems rather than goals

Jay D Williams
9 Dec 202209:28

Summary

TLDRIn this transformative narrative, the speaker recounts a pivotal moment where his wife's candid feedback on his weight loss struggle led to a profound personal revelation. She challenged him to create a system, rather than just setting goals, to achieve his desires. This lesson catalyzed a significant weight loss, a shift in mindset, and an approach to goal-setting that emphasizes systematization over mere ambition. The speaker then introduces a five-step framework to establish effective systems for goal achievement, emphasizing the importance of strategy, one-time actions, daily/weekly routines, and commitment to action. This framework, exemplified by his personal journey, underscores the power of systems in driving progress and success.

Takeaways

  • 💡 The speaker learned a valuable lesson about systems and goals from his wife during a low point in his life.
  • 🔄 The wife's insight was that the speaker didn't truly want to lose weight because he hadn't created a system to achieve it.
  • 🚫 The speaker realized that merely talking and complaining about goals without action is ineffective.
  • 🎯 Three significant changes occurred after this realization: losing weight, ceasing complaints, and focusing on systems over goals.
  • 📋 The importance of setting clear goals is emphasized as it provides direction and helps in prioritizing actions.
  • 🤔 The speaker suggests reflecting on past successes and researching what has worked for others to form a strategy.
  • 💼 One-time actions that provide long-term benefits, such as hiring a coach or joining a group, are recommended to move towards the goal.
  • 🗓️ Daily or weekly actions are crucial and should be part of a system that consistently works towards the goal.
  • 🏋️‍♂️ The 10-30-100 rule is introduced as a method to commit to daily actions and measure sustainability and progress.
  • 🔄 If the daily actions are not sustainable, it's advised to find a new set of actions and reapply the 10-30-100 rule.
  • 📺 The channel's content focuses on business, health, personal development, and other aspects of living, with a call to subscribe for more.

Q & A

  • What was the pivotal moment in the speaker's life that led to a significant change?

    -The pivotal moment was when the speaker's wife challenged him on his desire to lose weight, pointing out that he had not created a system to achieve it, which was a reality check that led to a significant change in his approach to goal setting and achieving.

  • What lesson did the speaker's wife teach him about systems and goals?

    -The lesson was that having a desire for a goal is not enough; one must create a system to ensure that the goal is achieved. The speaker's wife emphasized the importance of taking action and setting up a system to make the desired outcome happen.

  • How did the speaker's perspective on weight loss change after the conversation with his wife?

    -The speaker realized that he had been complaining without taking concrete steps to achieve his goal. This led him to stop complaining, start creating systems for achieving his goals, and ultimately lose 100 pounds.

  • What are the three major changes the speaker experienced after his wife's lesson?

    -The three major changes were: 1) He lost 100 pounds, 2) He stopped complaining about what he didn't have and started taking action, and 3) He began creating systems rather than just focusing on goals.

  • What is the speaker's five-step framework for setting systems to achieve any goal?

    -The five-step framework includes: 1) Set the goal, 2) Form a strategy, 3) Take one-time actions, 4) Create a system for daily or weekly action, and 5) Commit to action using the 10-30-100 rule.

  • Why is setting a goal important according to the speaker?

    -Setting a goal is important because it provides direction and helps to sift through the noise to figure out what one truly wants. Without a clear goal, one can be lost and not know where to focus their efforts.

  • What does the speaker suggest as a starting point for forming a strategy to achieve a goal?

    -The speaker suggests looking back at what has worked for oneself in the past and researching what has worked for others in the industry as a starting point for forming a strategy.

  • What is the purpose of taking one-time actions in the speaker's framework?

    -The purpose of taking one-time actions is to solve the problem or achieve the goal with a single effort that pays off forever, such as spending money to solve a problem, changing the environment, or finding groups of people who have solved the problem.

  • How does the speaker recommend creating a system for daily or weekly action?

    -The speaker recommends creating a daily or weekly checklist of actions that contribute towards the goal. This system should be something that can be done consistently to move forward towards the goal.

  • What is the 10-30-100 rule mentioned by the speaker, and how does it work?

    -The 10-30-100 rule is a commitment to action where one commits to their daily actions for 10 days to test sustainability, then for 30 days to see some progress, and finally for 100 days to see major progress towards the goal. It's a method to ensure consistency and commitment to the system created for achieving the goal.

  • What is the speaker's advice for maintaining motivation and commitment to the system?

    -The speaker advises using the 10-30-100 rule to maintain motivation and commitment. Seeing progress after the initial 10 days helps to motivate further action, and continuing the actions for 30 and then 100 days builds momentum and leads to significant progress towards the goal.

  • What role does human psychology play in the speaker's approach to achieving goals?

    -Human psychology plays a significant role as the speaker emphasizes that seeing progress after the initial 10 days of action motivates individuals to continue with their efforts. This psychological boost helps in sustaining the commitment to the system over the long term.

Outlines

00:00

💡 Life-Changing Lesson on Systems and Goals

The speaker recounts a pivotal moment in their life when their wife imparted a valuable lesson on the importance of systems over goals. Feeling ashamed about weight gain post-surgery, the speaker was seeking comfort but instead received a reality check. The wife pointed out that without a system in place to achieve weight loss, the speaker's complaints were baseless. This led to a transformation where the speaker lost 100 pounds, stopped complaining, and started creating systems to achieve goals. The speaker emphasizes the significance of setting up daily or weekly actions through a five-step framework to ensure goal achievement, beginning with setting clear goals.

05:02

🛠️ Implementing a Five-Step Framework for Goal Achievement

The speaker outlines a five-step framework to set up systems for achieving any goal. The first step is to set a clear goal, which provides direction. The second step involves forming a strategy by reflecting on past successes and learning from others. The third step is to identify one-time actions that can provide long-term benefits, such as investing in coaching or marketing. The fourth step is to create a system for daily or weekly actions that consistently move towards the goal. Lastly, the fifth step is to commit to action, using the 10-30-100 rule to test the sustainability and effectiveness of daily actions over time. The speaker shares personal examples, such as hiring a marketing agency to attract clients, to illustrate the application of this framework. The video concludes with an invitation to subscribe for more content on business, health, and personal development.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Systems

In the video, 'systems' refer to the structured and organized approaches or processes one creates to achieve a specific outcome. The speaker emphasizes the importance of establishing systems over setting goals alone, as systems provide the necessary actions and routines that lead to the realization of goals. The concept is central to the video's theme, as it is the foundation for the five-step framework the speaker shares for achieving any goal.

💡Goals

Goals are the desired outcomes or objectives one aims to achieve. In the context of the video, goals are important as they provide direction and clarity. However, the speaker argues that having a goal without a supporting system is insufficient. Goals are what drive the need for creating systems and are the starting point of the speaker's five-step framework.

💡Reality Check

A 'reality check' in the video is a moment of truth or a wake-up call that forces one to confront the facts and acknowledge the reality of a situation. The speaker recounts how his wife gave him a reality check about his weight loss struggle, which led to a significant change in his approach to achieving his goals.

💡Strategy

Strategy, as discussed in the video, is a crucial step in the speaker's framework. It involves analyzing what has worked in the past for oneself and others, and then formulating a plan to achieve the goal. The speaker uses the example of signing up 25 people for a gym to illustrate how one might develop a strategy by looking at past successes and industry benchmarks.

💡One-Time Actions

One-time actions are those that are done once but have a lasting impact or solve a problem permanently. In the context of the video, the speaker suggests identifying one-time actions as part of the strategy to achieve a goal. An example given is hiring a marketing agency to help with ads, which is a one-time decision that can lead to ongoing benefits.

💡Daily/Weekly Actions

Daily or weekly actions are the consistent, routine tasks that one performs to move towards a goal. The speaker highlights the importance of creating a system of daily or weekly actions as a key component of the framework. For instance, the speaker's goal of getting 25 new people to join his gym involves talking to five people every day.

💡Compliance

Compliance in the video refers to the adherence to a set of actions or a system. The speaker mentions the importance of being compliant with the daily actions for the first 10 days to test sustainability, and then for the next 30 and 100 days to see progress and achieve the goal. Compliance is a measure of how consistently one follows through with their system.

💡10 30 100 Rule

The '10 30 100 Rule' is a specific commitment strategy outlined by the speaker. It involves committing to daily actions for 10 days to ensure sustainability, then for 30 days to see progress, and finally for 100 days to achieve significant results. This rule is a tool to maintain consistency and motivation in working towards a goal.

💡Progress

Progress in the video is the incremental advancement towards achieving a goal. The speaker explains that after the initial 10 days of compliance with daily actions, one should start to see some progress, which is then built upon over the next 30 and 100 days. Progress is a motivational factor that encourages continued action and commitment to the system.

💡Sustainability

Sustainability in the context of the video refers to the ability to maintain a certain action or system over time. The speaker uses the first 10 days of the '10 30 100 Rule' to test whether the daily actions are sustainable, meaning they can be realistically incorporated into one's daily life without becoming overwhelming or unmanageable.

Highlights

A personal low moment led to a life-changing lesson about systems and goals.

The importance of creating a system to achieve goals was emphasized through a personal story.

The speaker lost 100 pounds by creating systems instead of just focusing on goals.

Complaining was replaced with action and system creation for personal development.

A five-step framework for setting systems to achieve any goal was introduced.

The necessity of setting clear goals as a direction for action was discussed.

The role of productivity tools is limited without a clear goal or direction.

Forming a strategy by analyzing past successes is key to achieving goals.

Identifying and learning from industry peers' successful strategies is crucial.

One-time actions that provide long-term benefits were highlighted as impactful.

The value of investing in expert coaching for progress was mentioned.

Daily or weekly actions are essential for consistent progress towards goals.

Creating a daily checklist can help maintain momentum towards a goal.

The importance of committing to daily actions for goal achievement was underscored.

The 10-30-100 rule for committing to new habits was introduced.

Sustainability of daily actions is tested within the first 10 days.

Progress is expected within the first 30 to 40 days of consistent action.

Major progress towards goals can be achieved with 100 days of commitment.

The channel offers videos on business, health, personal development, and other topics.

Transcripts

play00:00

it was at a really low moment of my life

play00:02

when my wife taught me a lesson about

play00:04

systems and goals that changed my life

play00:07

forever so we were sitting at this old

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busted Ikea table this was before the

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business before our kids before we even

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got married and I was complaining

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because I was feeling ashamed about

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gaining a bunch of weight after surgery

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and I was just kind of feeling like a

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fat loser so I asked her why do you

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think I'm having so much trouble losing

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weight she got a little annoyed and she

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looked me in the eye and said because

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you don't want to lose weight I said

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what of course I want to lose weight she

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said if you had wanted to lose weight

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you would create a system to make sure

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that it happened because you haven't you

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clearly don't want it so stop

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complaining about it it was like a slap

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in the face and it's really why I love

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her I was looking for somebody to Pat me

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on the back and give me a hug and say

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it's gonna be okay and what she gave me

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was what I actually needed which was a

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reality check the truth is I had talked

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about losing weight I complained about

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losing weight I even tried to lose

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weight but I never actually set my life

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up to lose the weight three things

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happened after that day number one I

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lost 100 pounds number two I stopped

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complaining about what I didn't have I

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either went for it or I let it go and

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number three I started creating systems

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rather than focusing on goals when I

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started getting serious about creating

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systems of daily or weekly actions I

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started achieving every goal I set in

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fact I don't even consider a goal

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serious unless I have a system around it

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so today I want to share the five-step

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framework I use to set the systems

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required to achieve any goal

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step number one set the goal the holes

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are still important you have to know the

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direction you're going in order to take

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the steps to get there you could have

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the most optimized way to drive to New

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York but if you truly want to fly to

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Hawaii then your system is useless this

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is what a lot of productivity YouTubers

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get wrong they'll tell you the perfect

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way to use notion or how to set up your

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browser to optimize your tabs but that's

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not going to help you find customers for

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your business or get a raise at your job

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what's the point of being productive if

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you don't know where you're going the

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goal is a way for you to sift through

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the noise and figure out what you really

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want if you don't have the goal you're

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going to be lost now your goal doesn't

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have to be I want to earn a million

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dollars or I want to lose 20 pounds it

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could be your goal is to explore

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different career paths in a particular

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field or learn as much as you can about

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coding or marketing what's important is

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that you are clear of the direction

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you're going it's important that you

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have a goal but the substance of the

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goal can be just about anything the key

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is that it is something you currently

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don't have which will make you do

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something that you currently aren't

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doing so let's say that I have a goal to

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get 25 new people to join my gym now

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move on to step number two form a

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strategy and there are two questions

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that I want to answer here number one

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what has worked for you in the past and

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number two what has worked for others in

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the past so for my goal signing up 25

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people I'm going to look back and find a

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time where I signed up 60 people in six

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weeks and what I did then was talk to as

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many people as possible and have my

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consults as quickly as possible how did

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I find the people I was using Google ads

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I was doing Facebook ads so if I want to

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achieve that goal again I could try that

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same path as a starting point the second

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thing is what has worked for others in

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the past is there anyone in your

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industry that has succeeded despite the

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odds what did they do differently find

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out what it is and write it all down for

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my goal of signing up 25 people I have a

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few friends in the industry and a couple

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of them have had success despite some of

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the lockdowns so I found out that they

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were creating documents every single

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month that they would offer to new

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people to get them on their email list

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and once they're on the email list they

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emailed them regularly so I'm going to

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write all that down what has worked for

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me what has worked for others and then

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create my strategy number three take the

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one-time actions first so these are the

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things that you do once that pay off

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forever so I'm going to ask myself

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questions like where could I spend money

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to solve this problem what could I

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change about my environment what could I

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eliminate where could I find groups of

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people that have solved this problem and

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just hang around them a lot of times you

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can solve your problems and get to your

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goals just by taking one-time actions I

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especially like spending money to solve

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the problem this is why I'm constantly

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buying coaching from experts because the

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experts will give you the feedback that

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will move you forward in a way that you

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couldn't figure are out on your own so

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with my goal of getting 25 clients I

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could hire a coach I could join a group

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of people with the same goal I could

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make a bet with a friend that if I don't

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get 25 clients by this time I'm gonna

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give them ten thousand dollars but what

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I ended up doing was hiring a marketing

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agency that could help me with my ads to

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bring in more people and because they're

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the experts they are going to bring in

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the people for me and if they don't

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bring in the people then I'll just go

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find a better one step number four

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create a system for daily or weekly

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action this is really where the rubber

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meets the road you need something that

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you can do every single day and every

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single week that will move you forward

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towards this goal ultimately wanting the

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goal is not going to get you there so

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what I love to do is to take a step

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forward every single day so I'll use my

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journal to create a daily checklist of

play05:36

things that I need to do to get to that

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action so for my goal of getting 25 new

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people I am going to talk to five people

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every single day if I do this every day

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it doesn't guarantee the goal but I know

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that I'm moving forward towards that

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goal if you had a goal of losing weight

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you might want to hit your nutrition

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numbers every day and work out every day

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and get to bed by 9 pm every day if you

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did those things every day I would say

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the chances of you losing weight if you

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had weight to lose are going to be

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pretty high so what are the daily or

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weekly things that you can do that will

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move you forward towards this goal if

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you don't do this step then you will not

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achieve that goal this is really the

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system behind the thing but it all falls

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apart unless you do step number five

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commit to action your plan is

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meaningless unless you do something so I

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like to use a rule called the 10 30 100

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rule so the first 10 days of your new

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daily actions your goal is to figure out

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if this is something that is sustainable

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so for my goal of getting 25 people I

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have to talk to to five people every day

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in order to get 25 new members so five

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people every single day I'm gonna commit

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to doing that for 10 straight days and

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I'm gonna be a hundred percent compliant

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during those 10 days I'm not going to

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miss a day if I do I will start over and

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the point here is not to get to the

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result although you may get some results

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the point is to see if this is something

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you can sustain in your daily life if

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you can do something for 10 days is less

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than two weeks if you can do it for 10

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days then you can probably do it for

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longer if you can't do it for 10 days

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then you need to find a new set of

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actions and try something new that you

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can sustain as part of your daily life

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so this is just a test those first 10

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days once you finish the 10 days

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assuming that it's something you can fit

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in your life now we focus on getting you

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some sort of progress and that is the

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next 30 days so those 30 days you're

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going to continue those daily actions

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and I don't commit to doing a hundred

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percent ninety percent is okay so if you

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miss one day a week or one day every two

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weeks that is okay but you're going to

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commit for the next 30 days to see if

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you can get some sort of progress you're

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not going to get the result but you're

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going to get some sort of progress so if

play07:50

my goal is to sign up 25 new people and

play07:53

I'm talking to five people every day and

play07:55

I do that for 40 days so the first 10

play07:57

days plus another 30 days I do that I'm

play08:00

gonna see some sort of progress I may

play08:02

not sign up 25 people but I might sign

play08:04

up two or three and I might have started

play08:06

some conversations that wouldn't have

play08:08

happened otherwise so now I've done this

play08:10

for 30 days I've started to see progress

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and here's the thing about human

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psychology once you see progress then

play08:16

you are motivated to do more and that's

play08:19

when I commit to the 100. you can

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completely change your life in a hundred

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days so if you take those daily actions

play08:26

and then you do them for an additional

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100 days then even if you're only 80

play08:31

compliant like you're not even 100

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you're 80 compliant you will start to

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see major progress towards your goals so

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that's the 10 30 100 tool if you really

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want to commit to those daily actions

play08:44

you've got to follow that rule and if

play08:46

you fall off at some point go through

play08:49

this whole process again start over

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again with a new set of actions or

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adjust your actions and then go through

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that 10 30 100 rule again if you're new

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to this channel my name is Jay this

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channel features one to two videos a

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week with topics around Business Health

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personal development and other fun

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experiments in living if you enjoyed

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what you saw please consider subscribing

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stay focused stay curious and keep

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[Music]

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