Stop Feeling “Used” by Women: You Need to Understand This About Dating

Summary

Cy Shand, a certified relationship coach, offers valuable dating advice for men looking to improve their dating strategy. He emphasizes the importance of adopting a higher perspective in dating, learning from each experience, and cultivating emotional maturity. By integrating feminine energy and understanding emotional triggers, men can become more grounded and confident, leading to healthier relationships. Cy also introduces resources, including audio trainings and a program, designed to help men shift their mindset and embody their most secure, authentic selves in dating. His approach focuses on personal growth and conscious dating for long-term success.

Takeaways

• 😀 The importance of perspective: Men and women have different perspectives when dating, and understanding this difference can lead to more successful interactions.
• 😀 Shifting your dating strategy: Men often recreate the same dating experiences, and adopting a new energetic strategy can help break the cycle and improve results.
• 😀 Moving from a lower field of view to a higher vantage point: Just like a child at Disneyland, seeing things from a higher perspective helps make more informed decisions and create a more enjoyable experience.
• 😀 The empowered dating paradigm: Instead of aimlessly going on many dates, focusing on a strategic and empowered approach will help men connect with the right people and be more intentional in their dating life.
• 😀 The feminine as a mirror: The feminine energy mirrors the masculine energy, showing where the masculine partner's heart is closed or not open to love, providing opportunities for growth.
• 😀 Personal growth and integration: Recognizing and addressing emotional triggers through self-reflection helps men evolve into a more grounded and emotionally mature version of themselves.
• 😀 The importance of gratitude in learning: Each dating experience carries a lesson, and by being aware of these lessons, men can integrate them and improve future interactions.
• 😀 Emotional resilience and boundaries: By identifying and covering emotional triggers, men can conserve their energy, ensuring they don't drain themselves in relationships or dating.
• 😀 Authenticity and confidence: When men start embodying their elevated, authentic selves, their natural confidence shines through, making them more attractive to others.
• 😀 Strategic dating through self-awareness: By reflecting on dating experiences and integrating lessons, men can shift from reactive to proactive and stop repeating the same patterns in relationships.

Q & A

What is the primary focus of Cy Shand's coaching for men in dating?

Cy Shand focuses on helping men gain clarity and confidence in the early stages of dating by empowering them to express themselves authentically, build a strong foundation, and attract the right people.

Why is perspective important in dating, according to Cy Shand?

Perspective is crucial because the person across from you, especially if dating a woman, has a different view of the situation. Understanding their perspective can lead to more successful interactions and connections.

What does Cy mean by ‘masculine energy’ in the context of dating?

Masculine energy, in this context, refers to a grounded, secure, and confident presence that allows men to navigate dating with clarity, strength, and authenticity.

How does Cy describe the approach to dating that many men typically use?

Many men approach dating with a problem-solving mindset, often dating in a repetitive manner without changing variables. This results in the same experiences and patterns repeating.

What paradigm shift does Cy suggest for men in dating?

Cy suggests that men shift from dating a large volume of people to adopting a higher vantage point in dating, where they make more intentional choices based on clarity and understanding, rather than just 'bumping around' aimlessly.

How can the concept of a child at Disneyland illustrate the shift in dating perspective?

The analogy illustrates how perspective affects the dating experience. Just like a child on their parent’s shoulders at Disneyland, who has a better view of everything, men can take a higher vantage point in dating to choose what excites them, rather than just reacting to what comes their way.

What is the role of the feminine energy in dating according to Cy Shand?

The feminine energy mirrors the masculine’s energy and reveals areas where the masculine partner's heart may be closed or where they might need growth. This mirroring helps men see where they need to open up emotionally.

What does Cy mean by 'you versus you' in the context of dating?

'You versus you' refers to the internal growth and self-awareness required in dating. Instead of focusing on the other person, men need to focus on how they show up, learn from the lessons each date provides, and improve themselves.

How does Cy suggest men should handle the feeling of being used in dating?

Cy suggests reflecting on the lessons and emotional triggers present in the interaction. By acknowledging and working through these emotional triggers, men can grow and stop perceiving themselves as being used.

What are the benefits of Cy’s new resource for men in dating?

Cy’s new resource offers audio trainings that help men shift their perspectives, develop emotional maturity, and practice new strategies for dating more strategically and authentically.

What is the key to moving beyond the 'nice guy' energy in relationships?

The key is shifting into a more grounded, secure, and empowered version of oneself, which Cy’s program helps to achieve by addressing emotional maturity, self-awareness, and building confidence.

How can men practice emotional maturity and energy conservation in dating?

Men can practice emotional maturity by reflecting on their emotional responses, integrating lessons from their experiences, and conserving their emotional energy by being mindful of what they allow to trigger or affect them.