Are You Who You Think You Are?

Summary

The speaker explores the profound impact of one's native language on worldview, using the example of English's time-conjugated verbs and Chinese's time-agnostic structure to illustrate how language shapes our perception of time. They argue that the pace of life and success is subjective, sharing personal stories of individuals overcoming hardships at different paces. Emphasizing the importance of personal growth and the fluidity of identity, they conclude that who we aspire to be is a product of our experiences and interpretations, which would differ had we been born in different times and places.

Takeaways

• 🕰️ The speaker emphasizes that the time it takes to achieve goals or become a certain person is not as important as the journey and personal growth.
• 🌐 The speaker believes that the first language one learns profoundly influences their worldview, with words serving as a means to convey complex ideas and emotions.
• 📚 Language evolves rapidly, and new terms can quickly become part of everyday communication, demonstrating how language shapes and reflects societal changes.
• 📖 The speaker highlights the peculiarities of the English language, such as verb conjugation based on time, which contrasts with languages like Chinese that do not conjugate verbs.
• 🕰️ The concept of time is deeply ingrained in English, affecting cultural values and the perception of time as a resource that can be converted into money and social power.
• ⏳ There is an inherent conflict for individuals who feel that time is not on their side, leading to impatience and dissatisfaction with the pace of personal progress.
• 👵 The speaker shares a personal story about a woman named Sarah, who, despite a troubled past and delayed success, eventually rose to a high corporate position, illustrating that success can come at varying paces.
• 👴 The story of the speaker's grandfather, who lost his success abruptly due to political changes, serves as a counterpoint to Sarah's story, showing that external factors can drastically alter one's life path.
• 🌟 The speaker's mother imparts wisdom that who we want to be is a product of our experiences and interpretations, which would be different had we been born in another time or place.
• 💡 The speaker suggests that people's ideas and beliefs may not be truly their own, but rather a product of their environment and upbringing, challenging the notion of individual self-awareness and identity.

Q & A

What is the speaker's view on the importance of time in achieving personal goals?

The speaker believes that the time it takes to achieve something or become the person you want to be does not matter. They emphasize that the focus should not be on the duration but on the journey and personal growth.

How does the speaker describe the impact of the first language learned on a person's worldview?

The speaker is a firm believer that the first language one learns has a profound impact on how they see the world. Language shapes the way we convey and understand objects, emotions, situations, and people.

What is the speaker's perspective on the evolution of language and its relation to cultural understanding?

The speaker observes that language evolves quickly, and this rapid change can sometimes create a barrier in understanding, as illustrated with the example of modern English words that might not be understood a decade ago.

Why does the speaker find the English language's conjugation of verbs based on time interesting?

The speaker finds it interesting because English conjugates verbs to reflect time, unlike Chinese, which is time agnostic and does not conjugate verbs. This difference highlights how language can influence cultural perceptions of time.

How does the speaker relate the concept of time in the English language to cultural values?

The speaker relates the time-conjugated verbs in English to the cultural value placed on time, as seen in the cliché 'time is money,' which reflects the importance of time in converting to financial and social power.

What personal anecdote does the speaker share to illustrate the point that time is not a determinant of success?

The speaker shares the story of a woman named Sarah, who, despite various setbacks and taking a long time to achieve her PhD, eventually rose to a high corporate position, showing that success can come at varying paces.

What does the speaker's mother's ability to read faces based on Chinese superstitions reveal about cultural beliefs?

It reveals that cultural beliefs, such as face-reading in Chinese superstitions, can provide a unique perspective on a person's life experiences and predict their future, emphasizing the role of culture in shaping beliefs and practices.

How does the speaker's grandfather's story contrast with Sarah's in terms of the impact of time on their lives?

The speaker's grandfather's story contrasts with Sarah's as he lost his success and status abruptly due to political changes, while Sarah took a long, gradual path to success, highlighting that time's role in life outcomes can vary greatly.

What does the speaker suggest about the nature of personal identity and the influence of external factors?

The speaker suggests that personal identity is not just a sum of experiences but also the interpretation of those experiences. They argue that had one been born in a different time and place, their identity and desires would be completely different.

How does the speaker address the idea that people's beliefs and values may not be inherently their own?

The speaker posits that people's beliefs and values are likely influenced by their environment and upbringing, and if they had been born in a different time and place, their beliefs might have been entirely different, suggesting that ideas are not inherently personal.

Outlines

00:00

🌐 Impact of Language on Worldview

The speaker discusses the profound effect of one's first language on their perception of the world. They explain how language encapsulates objects, emotions, and situations into words, which are then shared among people. The rapid evolution of language is highlighted with the example of Korean and English, showing how new terms can quickly become part of everyday lexicon, thereby changing our understanding and perspective. The speaker also touches on the unique aspects of the English language, such as verb conjugation based on time, which contrasts with languages like Chinese that are time agnostic and gender-neutral. They suggest that the way language is structured, particularly in relation to time, can influence a culture's relationship with and perception of time, using the cliché 'time is money' as an example of how deeply ingrained this concept is in English-speaking cultures.

05:02

🕰 Time's Role in Personal Growth and Satisfaction

This paragraph delves into the relationship between time and personal development, using the speaker's personal experiences and observations. The speaker shares a story about meeting a woman named Sarah, who was perceived by the speaker's mother, through a photo, to have had a difficult childhood and a delayed but eventual rise in life. The narrative contrasts the societal pressure for quick success with the reality that personal growth and achievement can take various timeframes. It emphasizes the idea that the time it takes to become the person one aspires to be is not as important as the journey itself, suggesting that external factors and timing are not the ultimate determinants of one's life trajectory.

10:04

👣 Overcoming Adversity: Sarah's Journey to Success

The speaker recounts Sarah's life story, which is marked by hardship and resilience. Born from a one-night stand and raised in an unstable environment, Sarah faced numerous challenges, including illness and substance abuse. Despite these adversities, she pursued a PhD, which took her ten years to complete. The speaker's mother had predicted a successful future for Sarah, which indeed came to pass as she rapidly ascended the corporate ladder in her late 30s. The story illustrates that success, although it may be delayed, can ultimately be achieved regardless of one's troubled past, reinforcing the idea that the time it takes to reach one's goals is less significant than the achievement itself.

15:07

🌟 The Ephemeral Nature of Success: The Tale of Two Lives

The speaker contrasts Sarah's story with that of their grandfather, who experienced a swift fall from grace due to political upheaval in China. Once a prominent lawyer and a friend of Chiang Kai-shek, the grandfather's life was abruptly altered with the rise of communism, leading to a life of poverty in Taiwan. This narrative is juxtaposed with Sarah's slow rise to success to emphasize that the time frame of achieving or losing one's aspirations can vary greatly. The speaker reflects on the idea that who we want to be is a product of our experiences and interpretations, and that had we been born in different times and places, our aspirations and identities would be fundamentally different. The paragraph concludes with a broader reflection on the nature of personal identity and the influence of external contexts on our beliefs and desires.

Keywords

💡Language Impact

Language Impact refers to the influence that the first language one learns has on their perception and understanding of the world. In the video, the speaker posits that the language we learn first shapes how we view the world around us, suggesting that our thoughts and interpretations are deeply rooted in the linguistic constructs we are exposed to from the start.

💡Words and Communication

Words and Communication is the concept that words are tools for conveying objects, emotions, situations, or people from one person to another. The speaker illustrates this by explaining how we encapsulate complex ideas into a series of syllables, making them portable and understandable across different individuals. This concept is central to the video's theme, emphasizing the power of language in shaping our reality.

💡Modern-Day Language

Modern-Day Language is highlighted in the video as a rapidly evolving system that reflects the changing societal norms and ideas. The speaker uses the example of North Korean banners being incomprehensible to modern Korean speakers, indicating how language can shift and evolve, leading to a disconnect between different generations or regions.

💡Intersectional Vegan Trans Man

The term 'Intersectional Vegan Trans Man' is used as an example of a complex and specific identity that may not have been widely understood in the past but is now more recognized in contemporary society. This keyword exemplifies how language can evolve to encapsulate new ideas and identities, thereby changing our collective consciousness and understanding.

💡Verb Conjugation

Verb Conjugation is the grammatical process of altering the form of a verb to indicate the time at which an action occurs. The speaker contrasts English, which conjugates verbs based on time ('am,' 'was,' 'will be'), with Chinese, which does not. This concept is tied to the video's theme by illustrating how different languages can shape our perception of time and its importance in our lives.

💡Time Agnostic

Time Agnostic refers to a language or culture that does not associate actions or verbs with specific times. The speaker mentions Chinese as an example of a time-agnostic language, which does not conjugate verbs to reflect time, suggesting a different cultural relationship with time compared to English-speaking cultures.

💡Time as a Resource

Time as a Resource is the notion that time is a valuable commodity that can be converted into money and social power. The speaker uses this concept to explain the cultural emphasis on time in English-speaking societies, where phrases like 'time is money' dictate daily activities and the urgency to achieve goals quickly.

💡Cultural Association with Time

Cultural Association with Time is the idea that the language we speak can influence how we as a culture perceive and interact with the concept of time. The speaker argues that because English conjugates verbs to reflect time, there is a strong cultural association with time, affecting how people approach life and success.

💡Personal Growth and Time

Personal Growth and Time is the concept that an individual's journey to self-improvement or becoming the person they want to be is not bound by time constraints. The speaker uses personal anecdotes to illustrate that success and personal growth can occur at varying paces and that the time it takes is less important than the journey itself.

💡Superstition and Face Reading

Superstition and Face Reading are cultural practices mentioned in the video that involve interpreting a person's life experiences and future based on their facial features. The speaker's mother uses this practice to predict aspects of Sarah's life, demonstrating how cultural beliefs can influence our understanding of a person's past and future.

💡Success and Timing

Success and Timing is the idea that achieving success or personal goals is not necessarily tied to a specific timeline. The speaker contrasts the stories of Sarah, who eventually found success after a long and challenging journey, and the speaker's grandfather, who lost his success abruptly due to political upheaval, to emphasize that the timing of success is not as important as the fact that it can be achieved.

💡Self-Awareness and Identity

Self-Awareness and Identity is the concept that our sense of self is not fixed but is shaped by our experiences and interpretations of those experiences. The speaker argues that who we want to be is a product of our imagination and life experiences, suggesting that self-awareness involves understanding that our identity is fluid and influenced by our environment and time.

Highlights

The speaker believes that the language you learn first profoundly impacts how you view the world.

Words are created to make objects, emotions, situations, and people portable across humans.

Modern language changes rapidly, with new words and meanings emerging frequently.

The speaker shares an anecdote about Korean friends not understanding North Korean banners due to language evolution.

In English, words can quickly become outdated, and new terms like 'intersectional vegan trans man' are now understood by many.

Language can change one's mind and perspective on the world, as demonstrated by the understanding of new terms.

English is unique in that it conjugates verbs based on time, unlike Chinese which is time agnostic and gender-neutral.

The concept of time in language may influence a culture's relationship with time, as seen with the English saying 'time is money'.

The speaker suggests that an emphasis on time in communication can lead to impatience and a feeling that things are not happening fast enough.

The speaker shares a story about meeting a woman named Sarah, who was like a big sister figure and faced many life challenges.

Sarah's life improved significantly in her late 30s, showing that success can come at varying paces.

The speaker's mother practiced face reading, predicting aspects of Sarah's life based on her facial features.

Sarah's story illustrates that it doesn't matter how long it takes to achieve success, as people only see the present you.

The speaker contrasts Sarah's story with his grandfather's, who lost his success abruptly when the Communists took power in China.

The speaker's mother emphasizes that people are a product of their time and place, and would be different if born elsewhere.

The speaker concludes that who you want to be is a product of your experiences and interpretations, which would differ if you were born at a different time and place.

Transcripts

it doesn't matter how long it takes for

you to achieve something or more

generally does it matter how long it

takes for you to become the person that

you want to be no I don't think it

matters how long it takes I'm a firm

believer that the language that you

learn to speak first in your life has a

profound impact on how you see the world

words are a funny thing because what we

do is we take an object or an emotion or

a situation or a person and we put them

into a series of syllables to produce a

word so that we can make it portable

from one human being to another to

convey that object situation or person

or emotion to one another it's actually

kind of strange because if you look at

modern-day language it's changing very

quickly no matter which language that

you're speaking I have some Korean

friends and very often I'd go and show

them a banner that I find from North

Korea and I'd ask them well what does

this say an overwhelming majority of my

friends would go and say I don't

understand what this is saying I

wouldn't be able to translate it for you

because I don't know what some of these

words mean now if you look at the

English language the same thing is

actually happening in today's English

take for example if there's a series of

words I'm going to say to you that you

might understand now but I guarantee you

ten years ago people wouldn't have

understood if I describe somebody as an

intersectional vegan trans man I

guarantee you ten years ago a hundred

percent of the people that I knew

personally would not know what that

means they wouldn't be even able to

understand or begin to comprehend what

that means but yet in today's world I'd

say that there's a greater percentage of

people who would know what I mean the

fact that these ideas have now been

conveyed into words and have been

transported from me to you the person

who is receiving this communication you

in essence have changed your mind in a

way to understand what those words

represent whether or not you like it

your mind has been changed by those

words in the way that you see the world

now that you know that such a type of

idea exists that kind of idea has

impacted you to an extent let's go a

little bit more basic than words and

grammatical structure in English what's

strange about English that some other

languages don't do is that we conjugate

verbs based on time let's give the

example of the word be in to state a

state of being right the present tense

is I am the past tense was I was and in

the future is I will be it's interesting

because am and was and B are different

words completely I learned how to speak

Chinese first when I first learned how

to talk and Chinese is time agnostic

they don't conjugate verbs at all and

it's also a gender-neutral language and

what's interesting about Chinese is that

I'm not going to I'm not going to

sugarcoat it Chinese people here in

America sometimes are the butt of jokes

because especially if they're not a

native English speaker they say funny

things like I going to the store today

because they don't conjugate verbs so

that's the notion that you would apply

time to an act of doing is very foreign

to somebody who's not a native English

speaker and especially to somebody who's

Chinese now why I mention this is that

if we attach a state of time to the

facility of language and almost every

single sentence that you utter you speak

right or read has something to do with

time then you would expect that the

culture itself that speaks that language

has a very strong association with time

and that's very true when it comes to

English because there's a cliche that we

say but it almost dictates our very

daily activities in the sense that we

say time is money time is the resource

that we use to convert into money which

gives us some kind of social power or in

essence it gives us money for us to

survive because for example if you work

on a production line and production

stocks for anywhere between a minute to

an hour

depending on the size of the company you

could be losing tens of millions of

dollars because nothing is coming out of

it you're wasting the resource of time

which would be turned into money at some

point now here's the thing if one of

your main facilities of communication

with other human beings is through

either reading or writing or through

spoken words and every single sentence

has some notion of time attached to it

then no wonder there are so many people

who come out and say well why is this

not processed happening fast enough why

am I not becoming the person that I want

to be faster or if somebody is at the

height of their career and they know

that they're going to start declining

well then maybe they will want to ask

well why is the decline why can't it

just happen now so we can get it over

with this leads to an inherent conflict

within a particular person to note that

time is not necessarily on their side

and they think that no matter what

things are not happening fast enough

because such an emphasis has been placed

on time in almost everything that they

do including the way that they

communicate with others so now here's

why I want to say that it doesn't matter

how long it takes for you to accomplish

something it doesn't matter how long it

takes for you to become the person that

you want to be I want to give you a

story when I first moved out here to the

East Coast from Chicago I met a girl who

was about 10 years older than me and she

was also from Illinois in the way that I

saw her was kind of like a big sister

figure in fact if I was five years old

and I had met her and she would have

been 15 years old my parents would have

told me to call her jiajia which is big

sister and it's it's funny because in

Chinese culture what's built into the

language is that family friends you

would call aunt or uncle it doesn't

translate well into English but it's an

ocean of respect that

the family friend is as if they are the

brothers and sisters of your parents and

that is the form of respect that's given

to the family friend and their children

as well so I would have called her big

sister but when I first met her we

talked a few times and we were at dinner

and we took a picture together

we were just messing around it was just

for fun and I guess my mom has the same

fingerprint as me because she ended up

getting into my phone when I went back

to Chicago and look through my pictures

some of them I wish she didn't see but

when she saw a picture of me and this

girl she immediately got up and she said

Bernard who is this girl and I said oh

it's Sarah let's call her that name now

my mom is a very superstitious person

and Chinese culture is a little bit

superstitious as well things like the

Chinese zodiac are built directly into

the language and take for example the

word for and the word death are they're

pronounced almost the same except

there's an inflection and tone up for

one and down for the other and

apparently in Asia according to some of

my family members there isn't a fourth

floor in some office buildings because

for sounds like death

it also doesn't make sense because in

the Chinese zodiac to people who are

four years apart in age are a harmonious

balance so I'm not sure what's one

switch but my mom very believes she very

much believes in reading faces and it's

a superstition that I guess she's picked

up over a longer period of time but what

it says is that based on how old you are

at a certain point in time and the

features on your face she's able to tell

the successes and triumphs or tragedies

that are going on in your life at any

point in time so as she was looking at a

picture of Sarah she went and said you

know Bernard Sarah had an awful awful

childhood you know I can tell just by

looking at her face

and you know the features that she has

awful childhood drifted when she was

maybe about 20 up to 30 years old she

was supposed to have gotten married when

she was in her early 30s but something

happened and she didn't end up getting

married and you know now that she's in

her mid mid to late 30s her life is

starting to go up but because she abused

her body when she was younger

she's going to she's going to live a

very long time but she's not going to be

healthy the entire time while she's

doing it so when I first heard this I

thought this is this is weird first of

all and you know I also want to test

this hypothesis because at the time I

didn't know too much about sarin

so the next time I got to see her I

asked her I said you know I by the way

if you're a guy like if you bring up

things like the zodiac I've never met a

girl who doesn't enjoy that conversation

but you know I knew how old she was and

I happen to know parts of the Chinese

zodiac too so I told her you know I know

what year you were born was last year

kind of bad for you and was the year

before even worse because those were

supposed to be two bad years according

to the Chinese zodiac and she agreed and

then I told her I said you know

accidentally that the picture we took at

dinner my mom she saw it and I like I

said probably has the same fingerprint

as me I don't know how that happened so

she you know she mentioned to me that

you had a very rough childhood and that

you drifted in your 20s and 30s you were

supposed to get married in your early

30s and as I was saying this like when I

said bad childhood she just kind of had

a smug look on her face but then when I

said you were supposed to have gotten

married in your early 30s then all of a

sudden like you could tell that she

became very interested in what I had to

say I didn't tell her what the future

was but she confirmed everything that my

mother said in fact she grew up in a

very broken household she was the

product of a one-night stand her mom was

22 dad was 45 and as she grew up with a

sister who was 6 years older than her so

you can guess the mom's age when first

child was born she was living with

multiple boyfriends here and there it

just seemed like there was no stability

in her life as a young child up until

the point where one of the boyfriends

throughout the mother and the two girls

so Sarah's mom then asked Sarah's dad if

she could sleep on his couch but

sleeping on his couch involved other

guys on the couch too so he ended up

throwing everybody out - Sarah ended up

growing up with her dad in some capacity

but throughout high school she ended up

falling extremely ill and it was

difficult for her to get through college

and when she was in college she had a

mild drug problem she was very

interested in science started working at

a couple

Chemical Company but then told me that

she would smoke pot in the bathroom and

do lines of coke during her lunch break

what was interesting about Sara was that

when she made the move to go and get a

PhD it took her ten years to get her PhD

and what was even more humiliating to

her was that there were people that she

t-84 they were undergraduates and she

was you know first or second year PhD

student and they finished their PhD

before she did and you know she told me

my life has been such a wreck I was

supposed to have gotten married but my

fiancee we cancelled it because he got

violent my life had been such a wreck

that when I see somebody passing me up I

just didn't care anymore and what's

interesting is I never told her the

future of her face reading from my

mother but my mom said that she would be

jumping very high up the corporate

ladder in a very short amount of time in

her late 30s she's she's pretty much in

her early 40s now and when I knew her

every six months

she made a jump she'd get a new

promotion and now she's you know vice

president level she's very high up it

took a very long time for her to reach

the level of success that she'd never

imagined that she'd have but it doesn't

matter because every new person that she

meets now as somebody at a

vice-president level would never have

known about any parts of her past so it

doesn't matter

how long it took her to reach success

the second example I want to give you is

the complete opposite of it and it is my

grandfather he was born in the early

1900s and he was in China before it

turned communist my grandpa at the age

of thirty became the most famous lawyer

in his province and he was elected to

the Congress of the Republic of China he

was good friends with Chiang kai-shek

who was the ruler of China at the time

before that entire political

establishment got thrown out by the

Communists now when October 1st 1949

rolled around and the Communists

captured Beijing it was game over for my

grandpa my grandpa wanted to restore the

Emperor so you can tell that that was

going to fly with the Communists and my

grandpa he ended up just living his life

in poverty in Taiwan and you know when

he arrived in Taiwan it was scorched

earth the Japanese had pretty much

raised the entire area all that was left

with some mountains and a railroad but

it's interesting because on his opposite

end his success was taken away from him

and it was taken away from him rather

abruptly there was not much that he

could have done about it because he

couldn't have reversed his political

positions at that point in time because

he had a pretty good track record of

wanting to do something like restore an

emperor so the Communists weren't going

to accept him his life pretty much ended

on October 1st 1949 and that there was

nothing that he could do to have gotten

his life back so as long as it took

Sarah for her to get the success that

she had it took just about a day for my

grandpa to lose all of his success so

what I'm trying to say is that it

doesn't matter how long it takes for you

to become the person that you want to be

or how long it takes for you to

accomplish something one of the things

that my mom told me when I was very

young my mom grew up in 1950s Taiwan had

she grown up in 1950s mainland China

especially in the province where she was

from

she was the age that she could have been

Redguard the revolutionary teenage

student group who started to out their

parents outed their teachers out of

their grandparents and who would wave a

red book that said that Chairman Mao

loves you more than your own family does

and I asked her I said but mom you are

against everything that Chairman Mao

says you are against everything that he

says would it have mattered whether or

not you were in mainland China whether

or not you would have been against it

and she told me she said well it would

have mattered because everybody around

me would have been thinking a same thing

and when everyone else around you is

thinking the same way you become a

product of what that is I didn't quite

understand it until now when I fully

realized that people are not really

self-aware until they realize

that had they been born in a different

time and in a different place that they

would be a different person completely

in every sense in essence you are not

just the sum of your experiences but you

are also the interpretation of those

experiences as well you see a lot of

turmoil going on right now in America

and in the Western world and you know

people get very upset over ideas here

and there what's interesting is is that

maybe the ideas themselves don't really

matter and maybe the ideas are not

really theirs because had they been born

in a different time and in a different

place those ideas might not have had any

traction at all and if they're not their

ideas then whose ideas are they because

if there's somebody else's it's likely

that it's not their idea either when it

comes down to it the person that you

want to be is only a figment of your

imagination and is a product of all of

your experiences and how you've

interpreted those experiences at that

current point in time because when it

comes to being the person that you want

to be who you want to be is a figment of

your imagination

it is a product of all the experiences

that you've had in your life and how

you've interpreted them and because of

that had you been born at a different

place and at a different time the person

that you'd want to be would be different

because you as a whole would be a

completely different person your

physical aspect is one part of you but

the ideas that would have been embodied

in you based on how you were brought up

at a certain point in time would have

been completely different

now some people take an assault on their

ideas personally but there's no reason

for them to take it personally there's

no reason for the anger behind any

assault on anybody's ideas because

remember had you been born in a

different place and a different time you

would not be you