When Narcissists Lose You Forever - This is What They’ll Do | NPD | Narcissism | Behind The Science

Summary

This video delves into the narcissist's mindset once they realize they've lost you for good. It explains their reactions, including attempts to regain control or resorting to devaluation and smear campaigns to discredit you. The narcissist views the loss of their primary source of supply as a significant blow, often trying to reel you back in with empty promises or blaming you for the relationship's end. The video advises maintaining indifference, focusing on your own well-being, and avoiding further emotional investment in the narcissist's behavior, as their manipulative patterns are unlikely to change.

Takeaways

• 😀 Narcissists strongly dislike losing a primary source of emotional supply, and they will react negatively when they realize they can no longer manipulate or control you.
• 😀 When a narcissist loses their primary source of supply, they may attempt to regain your attention, but this is not an effort to rekindle a romantic relationship—it's about re-establishing control over you.
• 😀 Narcissists rarely change their fundamental nature, even if they claim they've learned and changed. Any emotional declarations are manipulative attempts to lure you back into their cycle.
• 😀 If a narcissist doesn't attempt to regain your attention, they may resort to devaluing you and launching a smear campaign to vilify your character and avoid blame for the relationship's end.
• 😀 Narcissists are skilled at projecting their faults onto others, and in the event of rejection, they will manipulate others into seeing you as the problem.
• 😀 The narcissist will likely try to destroy your reputation, not out of a desire to get you back, but to maintain their image and avoid the consequences of their manipulative behavior.
• 😀 If you’re dealing with a narcissist who has lost you, it's essential to adopt an attitude of indifference and not to waste time obsessing over their actions or thoughts.
• 😀 Focusing on your own well-being and moving forward with your life is crucial. Narcissists thrive on control, and they will attempt to pull you back into their world if you let them.
• 😀 It’s important not to feel the need to vindicate yourself or prove your truth to others. People will either understand your side or remain under the narcissist's influence.
• 😀 Once a narcissist has lost you for good, your primary goal should be to continue progressing in your life, without looking back or being distracted by their manipulations.

Q & A

What is the narcissist's primary reaction when they realize they've lost someone for good?

The narcissist typically reacts with intense resentment and frustration when they realize they've lost their primary source of narcissistic supply. They despise losing access to emotional validation, attention, and control.

What does the narcissist desire most in their relationships with others?

Narcissists crave emotional validation, attention, and gratification of their needs. They prefer having a multitude of people around them who provide this supply, but they especially value those who give them the most attention and admiration.

What does the narcissist want when they attempt to re-engage someone they've lost?

When a narcissist tries to re-engage someone, they are not seeking a genuine romantic relationship. Their goal is to resume the cycle where the individual caters to their emotional needs without receiving any emotional reciprocation in return.

Why should one be cautious when a narcissist claims they have changed or miss the person they've lost?

The narcissist's claims of change or missing the person are often empty and manipulative. They are trying to coerce the individual back into fulfilling their emotional needs without offering anything in return, keeping the individual stuck in a one-sided cycle.

What is the second course of action a narcissist might take after losing someone?

The second course of action involves devaluing the individual by initiating a smear campaign. The narcissist will try to discredit the person, vilifying them to others and projecting their own flaws onto them to evade responsibility for the relationship's end.

How does a narcissist typically react when their core wound of abandonment is triggered?

When the narcissist's core wound of abandonment is triggered, they will feel intense emotional pain and embarrassment. In response, they may attempt to punish the individual by spreading false accusations or trying to ruin their reputation as a form of retaliation.

Why do narcissists project their flaws onto others during a breakup?

Narcissists project their flaws onto others to protect their fragile ego and avoid taking responsibility for the end of the relationship. By shifting the blame, they can maintain their sense of superiority and avoid confronting their own shortcomings.

What should one focus on after a narcissistic relationship ends?

After a narcissistic relationship ends, one should focus on self-care, healing, and personal growth. It is important to avoid obsessing over the narcissist's actions and instead center one's life on their own well-being and forward momentum.

How should someone handle the narcissist's smear campaign?

The best response to a narcissist's smear campaign is to remain indifferent. One should not feel the need to justify themselves or convince others of the truth. Allow others to make their own judgments while focusing on personal growth and recovery.

What is the key to moving on after a narcissist's manipulative behavior?

The key to moving on is to avoid becoming preoccupied with understanding the narcissist’s motives or attempting to change them. Accept that the narcissist will not alter their behavior and focus instead on healing, regaining emotional strength, and moving forward with your life.