The power of introverts | Susan Cain | TED

TED
2 Mar 201219:04

Summary

TLDRThe speaker shares her personal journey as an introvert and challenges societal biases favoring extroversion. She explains that introversion is not about being shy but rather how individuals respond to stimulation. The speaker advocates for a balanced appreciation of both introverts and extroverts, emphasizing the unique contributions of introverts in creativity and leadership. She calls for a reevaluation of our educational and workplace environments, which are predominantly designed for extroverts, and encourages embracing solitude as a source of creativity and innovation.

Takeaways

  • πŸ“š The speaker grew up in a family where reading was a central, social activity, shaping her identity as an introvert.
  • 🌲 She initially thought summer camp would be a bookish haven, but instead found a culture focused on extroverted behaviors like cheerleading.
  • πŸŽ‰ The camp experience highlighted a societal bias towards extroversion, where being outgoing was equated with being 'rowdy' and was encouraged over quiet pursuits.
  • πŸ€” The speaker felt conflicted, suppressing her introverted nature to fit in, which she later realized was a common experience for many introverts.
  • 🏒 Despite her introverted tendencies, societal pressures led her to become a Wall Street lawyer rather than pursuing her dream of writing.
  • 🌟 Introverts have much to offer, especially in creativity and leadership, yet they are often overlooked or encouraged to act more extroverted.
  • πŸ”’ Introverts make up a significant portion of the population, suggesting that their contributions are crucial but often undervalued.
  • 🏫 Schools and workplaces are largely designed to favor extroverts, with a focus on group work and an underestimation of the value of solitude.
  • πŸ’‘ The speaker argues for a cultural shift towards recognizing and valuing the introverted traits, such as the importance of quiet and solitude in fostering creativity.
  • πŸ§˜β€β™‚οΈ Historical figures and leaders, like Gandhi and Eleanor Roosevelt, have demonstrated the power of introverted leadership and the value of introspection.
  • πŸ“š The speaker concludes with a call to action: to reevaluate the way we structure our educational and professional environments, to embrace the benefits of both introversion and extroversion.

Q & A

  • What was the speaker's initial expectation of summer camp?

    -The speaker initially expected summer camp to be a place where she could read books and engage in quiet, introspective activities, similar to how her family enjoyed reading together as a form of social activity.

  • What was the reality of camp life as experienced by the speaker?

    -The reality was quite different from her expectations. The camp was more like a keg party without alcohol, with an emphasis on being rowdy and extroverted, which was the opposite of her introverted nature.

  • How did the speaker's experience at camp influence her future career choices?

    -The speaker felt pressured to conform to extroverted expectations, leading her to become a Wall Street lawyer instead of pursuing her true passion for writing, which was more aligned with her introverted nature.

  • What is the difference between introversion and shyness as described in the script?

    -Introversion is about how one responds to stimulation, including social stimulation, with introverts preferring quieter, low-key environments. Shyness, on the other hand, is about the fear of social judgment.

  • Why does the speaker believe that introverts are often overlooked for leadership positions, despite their potential?

    -The speaker believes that there is a cultural bias that favors extroverts, as they are often perceived as more assertive and outgoing. This bias can lead to introverts being routinely passed over for leadership roles, even though they may be careful and less likely to take unnecessary risks.

  • According to the speaker, what is the 'new groupthink'?

    -The 'new groupthink' is a belief system that suggests all creativity and productivity come from a very social and gregarious place. It promotes constant collaboration and group work, often at the expense of individual contemplation and solo work.

  • Why is solitude considered important for creativity?

    -Solitude is important for creativity because it allows individuals to exchange and advance ideas without the distortions of group dynamics. It provides a space for deep thought and the development of unique solutions to complex problems.

  • What is the speaker's call to action for schools and workplaces?

    -The speaker calls for an end to the constant group work in schools and workplaces. Instead, she advocates for more privacy, freedom, and autonomy, allowing individuals to work both collaboratively and independently as suits their nature and the task at hand.

  • How does the speaker's grandfather influence her views on introversion?

    -The speaker's grandfather, a rabbi and a man of deep introversion, was a powerful influence on her views. Despite his introverted nature, he was able to deeply connect with his congregation through his sermons, demonstrating that introverts can have a significant impact without needing to conform to extroverted expectations.

  • What does the speaker suggest as a way to better understand oneself and one's natural inclinations?

    -The speaker suggests taking a good look at what's inside one's 'suitcase,' a metaphor for the things that are most important and meaningful to an individual. By understanding and embracing these personal qualities and preferences, individuals can contribute more authentically and effectively to the world.

  • What is the significance of the speaker's 'year of speaking dangerously'?

    -The 'year of speaking dangerously' was a period during which the speaker practiced public speaking, preparing herself for the challenges of discussing her book and her views on introversion in public forums. This experience helped her become more comfortable with tasks that were outside her introverted comfort zone.

  • Why is the speaker optimistic about a potential shift in societal attitudes towards introversion?

    -The speaker is optimistic about a potential shift because she sees a growing recognition of the value of introverts and the importance of solitude in creativity and leadership. She believes society is on the brink of a dramatic change in attitudes towards introversion and quietness.

Outlines

00:00

πŸ“š Embracing the Introverted Lifestyle

The speaker shares a personal anecdote from her childhood, highlighting her introverted nature and love for reading, which was a family trait. She contrasts her expectation of a book-filled summer camp with the reality of a more extroverted, social environment. This experience led her to suppress her introverted tendencies, even choosing a career as a Wall Street lawyer over her dream of being a writer, in an attempt to fit in and appear more extroverted. The speaker emphasizes the societal bias towards extroversion and the loss it represents for individuals and society, given that a significant portion of the population identifies as introverts. She calls for recognition and utilization of introverts' strengths in creativity and leadership.

05:01

🏫 The Extroverted Bias in Modern Institutions

This paragraph delves into the systemic bias favoring extroversion in educational and professional settings. The speaker describes how modern classrooms are designed for group work, often sidelining introverted students who prefer solitary study. Despite research showing introverts tend to achieve better academically, the prevailing belief is that extroverted students are ideal. Similarly, in the workplace, open-plan offices and leadership positions favor extroverts, overlooking the benefits of introverted leadership styles, such as a propensity for careful decision-making and fostering employee autonomy. The speaker also highlights historical and transformative introverted leaders like Eleanor Roosevelt, Rosa Parks, and Gandhi, who led with integrity and a sense of duty, not for the desire of being in the spotlight.

10:03

🌿 The Power of Solitude in Creativity and Leadership

The speaker argues for the importance of solitude in fostering creativity and effective leadership. She explains the difference between introversion and shyness, noting that introverts thrive in quieter environments. The speaker advocates for a balanced approach to stimulation, suggesting that the current bias towards groupthink and collective work stifles individual creativity. She provides examples of renowned introverted figures like Charles Darwin, Dr. Seuss, and Steve Wozniak, who achieved significant accomplishments through solitude. The speaker also references religious figures who sought solitude for profound revelations, emphasizing the historical recognition of solitude's value, which has been somewhat forgotten in contemporary times.

15:04

πŸ”„ Cultural Shifts and the Need for Balance

The speaker explores the historical shift from valuing character to prioritizing personality in Western societies, particularly in the U.S. She discusses how the transition from an agricultural to a business economy led to an increased value on charisma and magnetism. The speaker criticizes the current cultural inheritance that favors extroversion and calls for a more balanced approach, recognizing the strengths of both introverts and extroverts. She emphasizes the importance of social skills and teamwork but also the need to encourage introverts to be themselves, as they are more likely to contribute unique solutions to complex problems. The speaker shares personal stories about her grandfather, a rabbi and introvert, who deeply loved his congregation and had a significant impact on people's lives.

πŸŽ“ Encouraging Introversion in a World of Extroversion

In the final paragraph, the speaker discusses her journey of embracing her introversion, from writing a book about it to challenging herself to speak publicly, which she refers to as her 'year of speaking dangerously.' She expresses optimism for a cultural shift towards valuing introversion and solitude. The speaker issues three calls to action: to reduce constant group work in schools and workplaces, to encourage solitude for personal revelations, and to recognize and share the unique qualities each person carries within themselves. She concludes with a message of hope and encouragement for both introverts and extroverts to embrace their natural tendencies and contribute positively to the world.

Mindmap

Keywords

πŸ’‘Introversion

Introversion refers to a personality trait where individuals prefer less stimulation and tend to be more reflective and energized in quieter, low-key environments. In the video, the speaker emphasizes the value of introverts, explaining that they have unique strengths that contribute to creativity and leadership. The script illustrates this through personal anecdotes and historical examples, such as mentioning that introverts make up a significant portion of the population and can be excellent leaders despite societal biases towards extroversion.

πŸ’‘Extroversion

Extroversion is the tendency to seek out and enjoy large amounts of social stimulation, often feeling more energized in the company of others. The video contrasts extroversion with introversion, highlighting how societal structures and expectations often favor extroverted behaviors. For instance, the speaker recounts her experience at summer camp where the extroverted cheer 'R-O-W-D-I-E' was promoted, indirectly suggesting that being rowdy and outgoing is more valued.

πŸ’‘Groupthink

Groupthink is a psychological phenomenon where conformity in groups overrides individual creativity and critical thinking. The speaker in the video criticizes the 'new groupthink' in educational and professional settings, where group work is overemphasized, potentially stifling the independent thought and creativity that introverts bring to the table.

πŸ’‘Solitude

Solitude is the state of being alone, which is portrayed in the video as a crucial ingredient for creativity. The speaker mentions several historical figures and their need for solitude to achieve profound insights. For example, Steve Wozniak invented the first Apple computer while working alone, emphasizing the importance of solitude in fostering innovation.

πŸ’‘Bias

Bias, in this context, refers to the favoritism or prejudice towards extroverted behaviors and personalities in society. The video discusses how this bias is ingrained in institutions like schools and workplaces, often disadvantaging introverts. The script provides examples such as the preference for group work in classrooms and the overlooking of introverted leaders in professional environments.

πŸ’‘Creativity

Creativity in the video is linked to the introverted traits of solitude and independent thought. The speaker argues that creativity thrives when individuals have the freedom to think deeply and independently, which is more characteristic of introverts. Examples given include the solitary work of Darwin, Dr. Seuss, and Steve Wozniak, which led to significant creative achievements.

πŸ’‘Leadership

Leadership is presented in the video as not solely the domain of extroverts but also a quality that introverts can excel in. The speaker points out that introverted leaders may be more cautious and better at allowing proactive employees to develop their ideas. Historical figures like Eleanor Roosevelt and Gandhi, who were introverted, are cited as examples of transformative leaders.

πŸ’‘Stimulation

Stimulation, in the context of the video, refers to the level of external input or excitement that an individual seeks or finds comfortable. The speaker explains that introverts and extroverts differ in their responses to stimulation, with introverts preferring quieter environments to feel most alive and capable, as opposed to extroverts who crave more active and noisy settings.

πŸ’‘Ambiverts

Ambiverts are individuals who fall in the middle of the introvert-extrovert spectrum, possessing traits of both. The speaker mentions ambiverts as having the best of both worlds, suggesting that they can navigate social situations and also enjoy solitude, thus benefiting from both introverted and extroverted qualities.

πŸ’‘Personality

Personality in the video is discussed in terms of its cultural significance and how it has shifted over time. The speaker contrasts the 'culture of character' with the 'culture of personality,' highlighting a historical shift from valuing moral rectitude to favoring charisma and social skills. This shift has contributed to the bias towards extroversion in modern society.

πŸ’‘Cultural Inheritance

Cultural inheritance refers to the societal values and norms passed down through generations. The video discusses how Western societies, particularly the U.S., have historically favored action and charisma over contemplation and introversion. This cultural inheritance has shaped current attitudes and biases towards personality types.

Highlights

The speaker's childhood experience at summer camp, where she felt out of place due to her introverted nature.

The cultural norm that favors extroversion and the pressure to conform to it.

The misconception that introverts should try to be more extroverted to succeed.

The importance of introverts in leadership and creativity, despite societal biases.

The prevalence of introversion, affecting one out of every two or three people.

The difference between introversion and shyness, and how introversion relates to stimulation.

The design of educational and work institutions that primarily cater to extroverts.

The 'new groupthink' and its impact on creativity and productivity.

The speaker's personal journey from a Wall Street lawyer to embracing her introverted nature as a writer.

The benefits of introverted leadership styles, as demonstrated by research.

Historical examples of transformative introverted leaders like Eleanor Roosevelt and Gandhi.

The speaker's advocacy for a cultural balance between introverts and extroverts.

The role of solitude in fostering creativity, with examples from history.

The psychological insights on group dynamics and the value of individual thought.

The cultural shift from valuing character to valuing personality in Western societies.

The speaker's call to action for embracing introversion and the benefits it brings to society.

The speaker's personal connection to introversion through her grandfather's influence.

The speaker's challenge to introverts to occasionally share their 'suitcases' with the world.

Transcripts

play00:15

When I was nine years old,

play00:17

I went off to summer camp for the first time.

play00:19

And my mother packed me a suitcase full of books,

play00:23

which to me seemed like a perfectly natural thing to do.

play00:25

Because in my family, reading was the primary group activity.

play00:30

And this might sound antisocial to you,

play00:32

but for us it was really just a different way of being social.

play00:35

You have the animal warmth of your family sitting right next to you,

play00:39

but you are also free to go roaming around the adventureland

play00:42

inside your own mind.

play00:43

And I had this idea

play00:45

that camp was going to be just like this, but better.

play00:47

(Laughter)

play00:50

I had a vision of 10 girls sitting in a cabin

play00:53

cozily reading books in their matching nightgowns.

play00:55

(Laughter)

play00:57

Camp was more like a keg party without any alcohol.

play01:00

And on the very first day,

play01:03

our counselor gathered us all together

play01:05

and she taught us a cheer that she said we would be doing

play01:07

every day for the rest of the summer to instill camp spirit.

play01:11

And it went like this:

play01:13

"R-O-W-D-I-E,

play01:15

that's the way we spell rowdie.

play01:17

Rowdie, rowdie, let's get rowdie."

play01:20

(Laughter)

play01:22

Yeah.

play01:24

So I couldn't figure out for the life of me

play01:26

why we were supposed to be so rowdy,

play01:28

or why we had to spell this word incorrectly.

play01:31

(Laughter)

play01:37

But I recited a cheer. I recited a cheer along with everybody else.

play01:40

I did my best.

play01:42

And I just waited for the time that I could go off and read my books.

play01:47

But the first time that I took my book out of my suitcase,

play01:50

the coolest girl in the bunk came up to me

play01:52

and she asked me, "Why are you being so mellow?" --

play01:55

mellow, of course, being the exact opposite

play01:57

of R-O-W-D-I-E.

play01:59

And then the second time I tried it,

play02:01

the counselor came up to me with a concerned expression on her face

play02:04

and she repeated the point about camp spirit

play02:06

and said we should all work very hard to be outgoing.

play02:09

And so I put my books away,

play02:12

back in their suitcase,

play02:15

and I put them under my bed,

play02:19

and there they stayed for the rest of the summer.

play02:21

And I felt kind of guilty about this.

play02:23

I felt as if the books needed me somehow,

play02:25

and they were calling out to me and I was forsaking them.

play02:28

But I did forsake them and I didn't open that suitcase again

play02:31

until I was back home with my family at the end of the summer.

play02:34

Now, I tell you this story about summer camp.

play02:37

I could have told you 50 others just like it --

play02:40

all the times that I got the message

play02:42

that somehow my quiet and introverted style of being

play02:46

was not necessarily the right way to go,

play02:48

that I should be trying to pass as more of an extrovert.

play02:51

And I always sensed deep down that this was wrong

play02:54

and that introverts were pretty excellent just as they were.

play02:57

But for years I denied this intuition,

play02:59

and so I became a Wall Street lawyer, of all things,

play03:02

instead of the writer that I had always longed to be --

play03:05

partly because I needed to prove to myself that I could be bold and assertive too.

play03:09

And I was always going off to crowded bars

play03:11

when I really would have preferred to just have a nice dinner with friends.

play03:14

And I made these self-negating choices so reflexively,

play03:19

that I wasn't even aware that I was making them.

play03:22

Now this is what many introverts do,

play03:24

and it's our loss for sure,

play03:26

but it is also our colleagues' loss

play03:28

and our communities' loss.

play03:30

And at the risk of sounding grandiose, it is the world's loss.

play03:33

Because when it comes to creativity and to leadership,

play03:36

we need introverts doing what they do best.

play03:39

A third to a half of the population are introverts --

play03:41

a third to a half.

play03:43

So that's one out of every two or three people you know.

play03:46

So even if you're an extrovert yourself,

play03:49

I'm talking about your coworkers

play03:51

and your spouses and your children

play03:53

and the person sitting next to you right now --

play03:56

all of them subject to this bias

play03:58

that is pretty deep and real in our society.

play04:00

We all internalize it from a very early age

play04:03

without even having a language for what we're doing.

play04:06

Now, to see the bias clearly,

play04:08

you need to understand what introversion is.

play04:11

It's different from being shy.

play04:13

Shyness is about fear of social judgment.

play04:15

Introversion is more about,

play04:17

how do you respond to stimulation,

play04:19

including social stimulation.

play04:21

So extroverts really crave large amounts of stimulation,

play04:24

whereas introverts feel at their most alive

play04:26

and their most switched-on and their most capable

play04:28

when they're in quieter, more low-key environments.

play04:31

Not all the time -- these things aren't absolute --

play04:33

but a lot of the time.

play04:34

So the key then to maximizing our talents

play04:39

is for us all to put ourselves

play04:41

in the zone of stimulation that is right for us.

play04:44

But now here's where the bias comes in.

play04:46

Our most important institutions,

play04:48

our schools and our workplaces,

play04:50

they are designed mostly for extroverts

play04:52

and for extroverts' need for lots of stimulation.

play04:55

And also we have this belief system right now

play04:59

that I call the new groupthink,

play05:01

which holds that all creativity and all productivity

play05:04

comes from a very oddly gregarious place.

play05:09

So if you picture the typical classroom nowadays:

play05:11

When I was going to school, we sat in rows.

play05:15

We sat in rows of desks like this,

play05:17

and we did most of our work pretty autonomously.

play05:19

But nowadays, your typical classroom has pods of desks --

play05:23

four or five or six or seven kids all facing each other.

play05:26

And kids are working in countless group assignments.

play05:28

Even in subjects like math and creative writing,

play05:31

which you think would depend on solo flights of thought,

play05:34

kids are now expected to act as committee members.

play05:38

And for the kids who prefer to go off by themselves or just to work alone,

play05:42

those kids are seen as outliers often

play05:44

or, worse, as problem cases.

play05:49

And the vast majority of teachers

play05:50

reports believing that the ideal student is an extrovert

play05:53

as opposed to an introvert,

play05:55

even though introverts actually get better grades

play05:57

and are more knowledgeable,

play05:59

according to research.

play06:01

(Laughter)

play06:03

Okay, same thing is true in our workplaces.

play06:06

Now, most of us work in open plan offices,

play06:09

without walls,

play06:11

where we are subject to the constant noise and gaze of our coworkers.

play06:15

And when it comes to leadership,

play06:17

introverts are routinely passed over for leadership positions,

play06:20

even though introverts tend to be very careful,

play06:22

much less likely to take outsize risks --

play06:24

which is something we might all favor nowadays.

play06:27

And interesting research by Adam Grant at the Wharton School

play06:30

has found that introverted leaders

play06:32

often deliver better outcomes than extroverts do,

play06:34

because when they are managing proactive employees,

play06:37

they're much more likely to let those employees run with their ideas,

play06:40

whereas an extrovert can, quite unwittingly,

play06:42

get so excited about things

play06:44

that they're putting their own stamp on things,

play06:46

and other people's ideas might not as easily then bubble up to the surface.

play06:51

Now in fact, some of our transformative leaders in history have been introverts.

play06:55

I'll give you some examples.

play06:56

Eleanor Roosevelt, Rosa Parks, Gandhi --

play06:59

all these people described themselves as quiet and soft-spoken and even shy.

play07:04

And they all took the spotlight,

play07:06

even though every bone in their bodies was telling them not to.

play07:11

And this turns out to have a special power all its own,

play07:14

because people could feel that these leaders were at the helm

play07:17

not because they enjoyed directing others

play07:19

and not out of the pleasure of being looked at;

play07:21

they were there because they had no choice,

play07:23

because they were driven to do what they thought was right.

play07:26

Now I think at this point it's important for me to say

play07:29

that I actually love extroverts.

play07:32

I always like to say some of my best friends are extroverts,

play07:35

including my beloved husband.

play07:39

And we all fall at different points, of course,

play07:41

along the introvert/extrovert spectrum.

play07:44

Even Carl Jung, the psychologist who first popularized these terms,

play07:47

said that there's no such thing as a pure introvert

play07:50

or a pure extrovert.

play07:51

He said that such a man would be in a lunatic asylum,

play07:54

if he existed at all.

play07:56

And some people fall smack in the middle of the introvert/extrovert spectrum,

play08:00

and we call these people ambiverts.

play08:02

And I often think that they have the best of all worlds.

play08:06

But many of us do recognize ourselves as one type or the other.

play08:09

And what I'm saying is that culturally, we need a much better balance.

play08:12

We need more of a yin and yang between these two types.

play08:16

This is especially important

play08:18

when it comes to creativity and to productivity,

play08:20

because when psychologists look at the lives of the most creative people,

play08:24

what they find

play08:26

are people who are very good at exchanging ideas

play08:28

and advancing ideas,

play08:30

but who also have a serious streak of introversion in them.

play08:33

And this is because solitude

play08:35

is a crucial ingredient often to creativity.

play08:37

So Darwin,

play08:39

he took long walks alone in the woods

play08:41

and emphatically turned down dinner-party invitations.

play08:44

Theodor Geisel, better known as Dr. Seuss,

play08:47

he dreamed up many of his amazing creations

play08:49

in a lonely bell tower office that he had

play08:51

in the back of his house in La Jolla, California.

play08:54

And he was actually afraid to meet the young children who read his books

play08:58

for fear that they were expecting him this kind of jolly Santa Claus-like figure

play09:02

and would be disappointed with his more reserved persona.

play09:06

Steve Wozniak invented the first Apple computer

play09:08

sitting alone in his cubicle in Hewlett-Packard

play09:11

where he was working at the time.

play09:13

And he says that he never would have become such an expert in the first place

play09:16

had he not been too introverted to leave the house

play09:19

when he was growing up.

play09:21

Now, of course,

play09:23

this does not mean that we should all stop collaborating --

play09:26

and case in point, is Steve Wozniak famously coming together with Steve Jobs

play09:29

to start Apple Computer --

play09:32

but it does mean that solitude matters

play09:35

and that for some people it is the air that they breathe.

play09:39

And in fact, we have known for centuries about the transcendent power of solitude.

play09:45

It's only recently that we've strangely begun to forget it.

play09:48

If you look at most of the world's major religions,

play09:51

you will find seekers --

play09:53

Moses, Jesus, Buddha, Muhammad --

play09:56

seekers who are going off by themselves alone to the wilderness,

play10:00

where they then have profound epiphanies and revelations

play10:02

that they then bring back to the rest of the community.

play10:05

So, no wilderness, no revelations.

play10:09

This is no surprise, though,

play10:11

if you look at the insights of contemporary psychology.

play10:14

It turns out that we can't even be in a group of people

play10:17

without instinctively mirroring, mimicking their opinions.

play10:20

Even about seemingly personal and visceral things

play10:22

like who you're attracted to,

play10:24

you will start aping the beliefs of the people around you

play10:27

without even realizing that that's what you're doing.

play10:29

And groups famously follow the opinions

play10:32

of the most dominant or charismatic person in the room,

play10:34

even though there's zero correlation

play10:36

between being the best talker and having the best ideas --

play10:39

I mean zero.

play10:41

So --

play10:43

(Laughter)

play10:45

You might be following the person with the best ideas,

play10:48

but you might not.

play10:50

And do you really want to leave it up to chance?

play10:53

Much better for everybody to go off by themselves,

play10:55

generate their own ideas

play10:57

freed from the distortions of group dynamics,

play10:59

and then come together as a team

play11:01

to talk them through in a well-managed environment

play11:04

and take it from there.

play11:06

Now if all this is true,

play11:08

then why are we getting it so wrong?

play11:11

Why are we setting up our schools this way, and our workplaces?

play11:14

And why are we making these introverts feel so guilty

play11:16

about wanting to just go off by themselves some of the time?

play11:19

One answer lies deep in our cultural history.

play11:22

Western societies,

play11:24

and in particular the U.S.,

play11:26

have always favored the man of action over the "man" of contemplation.

play11:34

But in America's early days,

play11:37

we lived in what historians call a culture of character,

play11:40

where we still, at that point, valued people

play11:42

for their inner selves and their moral rectitude.

play11:45

And if you look at the self-help books from this era,

play11:47

they all had titles with things like

play11:49

"Character, the Grandest Thing in the World."

play11:52

And they featured role models like Abraham Lincoln,

play11:55

who was praised for being modest and unassuming.

play11:57

Ralph Waldo Emerson called him

play11:59

"A man who does not offend by superiority."

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But then we hit the 20th century,

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and we entered a new culture

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that historians call the culture of personality.

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What happened is we had evolved an agricultural economy

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to a world of big business.

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And so suddenly people are moving from small towns to the cities.

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And instead of working alongside people they've known all their lives,

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now they are having to prove themselves in a crowd of strangers.

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So, quite understandably,

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qualities like magnetism and charisma suddenly come to seem really important.

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And sure enough, the self-help books change to meet these new needs

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and they start to have names

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like "How to Win Friends and Influence People."

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And they feature as their role models really great salesmen.

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So that's the world we're living in today.

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That's our cultural inheritance.

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Now none of this is to say that social skills are unimportant,

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and I'm also not calling for the abolishing of teamwork at all.

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The same religions who send their sages off to lonely mountain tops

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also teach us love and trust.

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And the problems that we are facing today

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in fields like science and in economics

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are so vast and so complex

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that we are going to need armies of people coming together

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to solve them working together.

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But I am saying that the more freedom that we give introverts to be themselves,

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the more likely that they are

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to come up with their own unique solutions to these problems.

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So now I'd like to share with you what's in my suitcase today.

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Guess what?

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Books.

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I have a suitcase full of books.

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Here's Margaret Atwood, "Cat's Eye."

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Here's a novel by Milan Kundera.

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And here's "The Guide for the Perplexed" by Maimonides.

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But these are not exactly my books.

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I brought these books with me

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because they were written by my grandfather's favorite authors.

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My grandfather was a rabbi

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and he was a widower

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who lived alone in a small apartment in Brooklyn

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that was my favorite place in the world when I was growing up,

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partly because it was filled with his very gentle, very courtly presence

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and partly because it was filled with books.

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I mean literally every table, every chair in this apartment

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had yielded its original function

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to now serve as a surface for swaying stacks of books.

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Just like the rest of my family,

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my grandfather's favorite thing to do in the whole world was to read.

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But he also loved his congregation,

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and you could feel this love in the sermons that he gave

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every week for the 62 years that he was a rabbi.

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He would takes the fruits of each week's reading

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and he would weave

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these intricate tapestries of ancient and humanist thought.

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And people would come from all over to hear him speak.

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But here's the thing about my grandfather.

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Underneath this ceremonial role,

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he was really modest and really introverted --

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so much so that when he delivered these sermons,

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he had trouble making eye contact

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with the very same congregation that he had been speaking to for 62 years.

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And even away from the podium,

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when you called him to say hello,

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he would often end the conversation prematurely

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for fear that he was taking up too much of your time.

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But when he died at the age of 94,

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the police had to close down the streets of his neighborhood

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to accommodate the crowd of people who came out to mourn him.

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And so these days I try to learn from my grandfather's example

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in my own way.

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So I just published a book about introversion,

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and it took me about seven years to write.

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And for me, that seven years was like total bliss,

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because I was reading, I was writing,

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I was thinking, I was researching.

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It was my version

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of my grandfather's hours of the day alone in his library.

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But now all of a sudden my job is very different,

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and my job is to be out here talking about it,

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talking about introversion.

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(Laughter)

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And that's a lot harder for me,

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because as honored as I am to be here with all of you right now,

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this is not my natural milieu.

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So I prepared for moments like these as best I could.

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I spent the last year practicing public speaking

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every chance I could get.

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And I call this my "year of speaking dangerously."

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(Laughter)

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And that actually helped a lot.

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But I'll tell you, what helps even more

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is my sense, my belief, my hope that when it comes to our attitudes

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to introversion and to quiet and to solitude,

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we truly are poised on the brink on dramatic change.

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I mean, we are.

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And so I am going to leave you now

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with three calls for action for those who share this vision.

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Number one:

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Stop the madness for constant group work.

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Just stop it.

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(Laughter)

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Thank you.

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(Applause)

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And I want to be clear about what I'm saying,

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because I deeply believe our offices

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should be encouraging casual, chatty cafe-style types of interactions --

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you know, the kind where people come together

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and serendipitously have an exchange of ideas.

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That is great.

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It's great for introverts and it's great for extroverts.

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But we need much more privacy and much more freedom

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and much more autonomy at work.

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School, same thing.

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We need to be teaching kids to work together, for sure,

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but we also need to be teaching them how to work on their own.

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This is especially important for extroverted children too.

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They need to work on their own

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because that is where deep thought comes from in part.

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Okay, number two: Go to the wilderness.

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Be like Buddha, have your own revelations.

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I'm not saying

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that we all have to now go off and build our own cabins in the woods

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and never talk to each other again,

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but I am saying that we could all stand to unplug

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and get inside our own heads a little more often.

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Number three:

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Take a good look at what's inside your own suitcase

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and why you put it there.

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So extroverts,

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maybe your suitcases are also full of books.

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Or maybe they're full of champagne glasses or skydiving equipment.

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Whatever it is, I hope you take these things out every chance you get

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and grace us with your energy and your joy.

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But introverts, you being you,

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you probably have the impulse to guard very carefully

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what's inside your own suitcase.

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And that's okay.

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But occasionally, just occasionally,

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I hope you will open up your suitcases for other people to see,

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because the world needs you and it needs the things you carry.

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So I wish you the best of all possible journeys

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and the courage to speak softly.

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Thank you very much.

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(Applause)

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Thank you. Thank you.

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(Applause)

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Related Tags
IntroversionLeadershipCreativityPersonalitySocial DynamicsSolo WorkGroup WorkQuiet StrengthCultural BiasInner Reflection