99% of my time goes to this one skill

Summary

In this insightful transcript, the speaker shares key principles of effective leadership and team building. They emphasize the importance of giving discretionary effort, believing in people's ability to learn, and investing in team members as if they will never leave, while hoping they will. The speaker also highlights the significance of being a well-rounded leader who inspires in all facets of life, not just business. They stress that actions speak louder than words, and how a leader's behavior sets the standard for the entire team, ultimately attracting and retaining top talent.

Takeaways

• 🤝 The importance of building a strong team dynamic where members genuinely like and support each other was highlighted as a key takeaway from a dinner with entrepreneurs.
• 🚀 The speaker emphasizes that leadership is not just about mastering business functions but understanding human psychology and being a person others want to follow.
• 💡 The concept of 'discretionary effort' is introduced as a leadership principle, suggesting that leaders should put in extra effort without expecting it first, fostering a reciprocal culture.
• 🎁 Personalizing the care for team members, such as remembering birthdays and personal milestones, can significantly contribute to team cohesion and loyalty.
• 🌟 The belief that people are not inherently stupid but often poorly taught is crucial for leaders who want to develop their teams' potential and improve performance.
• 👨‍🏫 Effective teaching and feedback are identified as essential skills for leaders to instill in their teams, focusing on clarity, encouragement, and alignment with personal goals.
• 💼 Investing in people as if they will never leave, while also being supportive if they do, is a paradoxical yet effective leadership approach that builds trust and respect.
• 🔄 The idea that great leaders inspire in all facets of life, not just business, is presented as a way to earn the respect and loyalty of team members.
• 👔 Demonstrating the desired behavior and standards as a leader sets the precedent for team members, who will follow suit based on what they observe from the leader.
• 🌱 The speaker's personal journey of self-improvement in areas such as fitness, mindset, and emotional management has a direct impact on their leadership abilities and team culture.
• 🛑 The cost of investing in and trusting the wrong people is acknowledged as an inevitable part of building a great team, and leaders must be willing to bear this cost for the greater good.

Q & A

What was the main topic of discussion during the dinner with entrepreneurs?

The main topic was about leadership and team dynamics, specifically how to create an environment where team members genuinely like being around each other and reflect the leader's values.

Why did one entrepreneur express jealousy towards the speaker?

The entrepreneur was jealous because the speaker's team seemed to work well together, joke together, and genuinely like each other, which he wanted to achieve within his own team.

What is the speaker's usual focus when discussing business operations?

The speaker usually focuses on tactical aspects such as operations, marketing, sales, customer success, people operations, and hiring, rather than the principles of leadership.

What does the speaker believe is the key to becoming a better leader?

The speaker believes that understanding human psychology, being a better person, and being someone people want to follow are key to becoming a better leader.

What is the first belief the speaker shared about leadership?

The first belief is that if the leader gives discretionary effort, they will get it in return, and it's important to give this effort before expecting it from others.

How did the speaker apply the principles of discretionary effort in their personal training business?

The speaker kept track of clients' personal details like birthdays and anniversaries, showing interest in their lives beyond just being clients, which helped in building strong relationships and retaining clients.

What is the concept of 'Act until you care' as mentioned by the speaker?

'Act until you care' is the idea of demonstrating care and interest in team members even if you don't initially feel it, with the belief that these actions will eventually lead to genuine feelings of care.

What was the impact of changing the sales team manager in the speaker's company?

After changing the sales team manager, the company saw a doubling of sales production within a week because the new manager cared about the team members as people and created a supportive environment.

What is the speaker's view on people being 'stupid' in a business context?

The speaker believes that most people are not stupid but rather that many leaders are bad teachers. They think that most people can learn most things if they are taught and trained properly.

How does the speaker approach giving feedback to their team?

The speaker focuses on giving feedback that is not punishing but encouraging, identifying what good looks like, where someone is at, and the discrepancy, and communicating this in a way that helps the person grow.

What is the speaker's advice for leaders who feel their team is not performing well?

The speaker advises such leaders to reflect on their own teaching abilities and to consider whether they are effectively training and reinforcing desired behaviors in their team members.

What belief does the speaker hold about investing in team members?

The speaker believes in investing in people as if they will never leave, while also being happy and supportive if they decide to leave, as this investment helps build a strong team culture.

Can you give an example of how the speaker's investment in a team member led to a positive outcome even after they left the company?

The speaker shared an example where they encouraged a sales team member to leave and start his own business after investing in him for years. Even after leaving, they maintained a mentor-mentee relationship, which the speaker considers a win.

What is the final leadership belief shared by the speaker in the script?

The final belief is that if a leader wants team members to be their best, the leader must also be at their best in all aspects of life, inspiring others through their character and actions.

How did the speaker realize the importance of their own behavior in setting standards for the team?

The speaker realized this when they noticed their team members showing up to work in a casual manner similar to how the speaker was presenting themselves. By improving their own appearance and behavior, the team followed suit.

What impact did the speaker's personal health and fitness habits have on the team?

The speaker's habit of using a walking treadmill during calls influenced team members to do the same, leading to a healthier and more active work environment, and even weight loss among team members.

Outlines

00:00

🤝 Building Genuine Team Relationships

The speaker recounts an experience at a dinner with entrepreneurs where one expressed envy over the cohesiveness and camaraderie within the speaker's team. This prompted a discussion on leadership and how to foster a strong team. The speaker admits that while they often focus on tactical aspects of business, they spend most of their time on understanding human psychology and improving as a leader. The key takeaway is the importance of being a leader that people genuinely want to follow, which involves creating a community and a positive work environment.

05:01

💡 The Power of Discretionary Effort

The speaker emphasizes the concept of discretionary effort in leadership, suggesting that leaders should put in extra effort without expecting it in return. They share a personal story from their time as a personal trainer, where they went beyond professional duties to understand their clients' lives, which translated into a successful team dynamic later. The idea is to view team members holistically and invest in them as individuals, which eventually fosters a culture of care and mutual respect.

10:02

🚫 Rejecting the Notion of 'Stupid' Team Members

The speaker argues against the belief that team members are unintelligent, instead suggesting that many leaders are simply ineffective teachers. They share experiences where changing management led to significant improvements, attributing this to the new leaders' ability to teach and empower their teams. The speaker advocates for the belief in people's capacity to learn and the importance of providing constructive feedback that encourages growth rather than focusing on mistakes.

15:04

💼 Investing in People as Long-term Assets

The speaker discusses the importance of investing in team members as if they will never leave, while also being supportive if they do. They stress that this approach can lead to a stronger culture and better team performance. The speaker shares personal stories of team members who left to pursue their ventures and how they encouraged and supported these decisions, highlighting the long-term benefits of such investments in personal and professional growth.

20:06

🏆 Leading by Example to Inspire Team Excellence

The speaker believes that to inspire team members to be their best, a leader must embody excellence in all aspects of life. They discuss the influence of their own behavior on team culture, such as showing up well-groomed and maintaining a healthy lifestyle, which in turn inspired their team to do the same. The speaker stresses the importance of being a well-rounded role model and the impact it has on attracting and retaining top talent.

25:06

🌟 Operationalizing Leadership Through Personal Development

In the final paragraph, the speaker reflects on the importance of personal development in leadership. They express a commitment to operationalizing leadership principles that go beyond traditional advice. The speaker shares how their personal growth in areas such as emotional management and communication has directly improved their team's performance. The emphasis is on the idea that being a better person leads to being a better leader and creating a stronger team.

Keywords

💡Leadership

Leadership refers to the ability to guide, influence, and inspire others towards achieving a common goal. In the video, the speaker emphasizes the importance of operationalizing leadership through understanding human psychology and building strong interpersonal relationships within a team. The speaker's personal experiences demonstrate how leadership is not just about tactical business skills but also about creating a positive and supportive work environment.

💡Discretionary Effort

Discretionary effort is the voluntary and extra effort put into work beyond what is formally required. The speaker discusses how giving discretionary effort to team members, such as showing personal interest and care, can foster a reciprocal response, thereby strengthening team dynamics. An example from the script is the speaker's initiative to remember and acknowledge clients' personal milestones, which reflects a similar approach to team leadership.

💡Teamwork

Teamwork is the collaborative effort of a group to achieve a goal or complete a task. The video highlights the significance of a team that works well together, where members reflect the leader's values and enjoy each other's company. The speaker shares personal anecdotes about creating a sense of community within the team, which is crucial for a positive and productive work culture.

💡Human Psychology

Human psychology is the study of human behavior and mental processes. The speaker spends a significant portion of their time understanding human psychology to become a better leader. It is central to the video's message as it underpins the speaker's approach to leadership, which focuses on emotional intelligence, empathy, and personal growth, rather than purely operational or tactical business skills.

💡Tactical Business Skills

Tactical business skills refer to the specific, actionable techniques and methods used in operating a business, such as marketing, sales, and customer success. The speaker mentions that while they discuss these skills frequently, they believe that leadership principles and understanding human behavior are more crucial for long-term success and team building.

💡Personal Investment

Personal investment in the video context refers to the speaker's approach of investing time and effort into understanding and caring for their team members as individuals. This investment goes beyond professional duties and includes showing genuine concern for their personal lives. The speaker's calendar example, where they keep track of clients' and team members' personal events, illustrates this concept.

💡Feedback

Feedback in the video is discussed as a critical component of teaching and leadership. The speaker believes that providing constructive feedback that is tied to an individual's personal goals can motivate and guide them towards improvement. The speaker contrasts this with traditional feedback that may be perceived as punishing and demoralizing.

💡Trust

Trust is the confidence in the reliability, truth, or ability of someone. The speaker emphasizes the importance of trusting team members and leading by example. They share an experience where trust was betrayed but chose to continue investing in and trusting others, viewing it as a necessary risk for building a strong team.

💡Cultural Shift

A cultural shift refers to a significant change in the values, beliefs, and behaviors that characterize a group or organization. The video describes a situation where the speaker recognized a negative culture led by a poor manager and took action to change it. The new manager's leadership style led to a dramatic increase in sales, illustrating the impact of a cultural shift on team performance.

💡Personal Growth

Personal growth is the process of improving and developing as a person, both professionally and personally. The speaker discusses their own journey of personal growth, including fitness, mindset, and emotional management, which has influenced their leadership style. They believe that personal growth is essential for leaders to inspire and attract great talent.

💡Role Modeling

Role modeling is the act of setting an example for others to follow. The speaker explains how their behavior and attitude set the standard for the team, and by improving their own conduct, they influenced the team to follow suit. The example of the speaker's change in appearance leading to a more professional team appearance illustrates the power of role modeling.

Highlights

The importance of creating a team environment where members genuinely enjoy each other's company and reflect the leader's values.

The challenge of operationalizing leadership and teaching principles that are more about human psychology than tactical business operations.

The concept of giving discretionary effort to team members to foster a culture of mutual respect and care.

The personal trainer analogy for understanding and investing in clients' lives as a way to build strong professional relationships.

The belief that acting as if you care about team members can lead to genuinely caring over time.

The impact of leadership behavior on team dynamics, demonstrating that a leader's actions set the standard for the team.

The story of a sales team's transformation through the replacement of a manager who did not care for the team's well-being.

The belief that most people are not stupid but rather the result of bad teaching or lack of proper training.

The importance of feedback in teaching and the need to present it in a way that is encouraging rather than punishing.

The story of a leader who was let go for not knowing how to teach and the positive outcomes after his replacement.

The belief in investing in people as if they will never leave, while also being happy if they choose to pursue other opportunities.

The personal story of an employee leaving to start their own business and the leader's supportive response.

The acknowledgment of the risk involved in investing in team members and the potential for feeling betrayed.

The principle that leaders must be at their best to inspire their team to be at their best, emphasizing personal character and life management.

The idea that leadership is demonstrated through actions, not just words, and how this influences team behavior.

The story of promoting a healthy work environment by personal example, leading to a team-wide shift in health and fitness.

The conclusion that great people won't work for a mediocre leader, emphasizing the need for continuous self-improvement as a leader.

Transcripts

so last night I was at a dinner with a

group of 10 entrepreneurs and I want to

say most of them were between 1 to 8

million dollar in Revenue one of them

said something to me he said you know

the biggest thing that I learned uh

coming to one of your workshops and then

now spending more time with you one of

the things that I walked away with was I

actually felt very jealous of you and

your team and I was like what do you

what do you mean because I never heard

anyone say that before and he said I

want to feel the same way like the same

way that your team reflects you so well

and you all work so well together and

you all joke together and you all seem

like you genuinely like being around

each other I want to learn how to do

that and it's interesting because I

think a lot of my channel a lot of what

I talk about is a lot more tactical

around the operations and Marketing

sales customer success people operations

hiring recruiting um very tactical and I

think the reason for that is because I

have really struggled with how to

operationalize leadership and teach the

princi principles that are actually

where I spend 99% of my time because the

reality is I don't spend most of my days

trying to learn each function of a

business I spend most of my days trying

to understand human psychology and how I

can be a better leader and how I can be

a better person that people want to

follow and so I went on a little bit of

a rant because I didn't realize that was

something people wanted and as soon as

this guy said that everyone else at the

table was like yes like I want that like

can we learn that like how do you do

that I don't want to walk walk into work

every day feeling like I don't like my

team and they don't like me I want to be

able to walk in and feel like I have a

community that I've created and so you

know they said they kind of put me on

the spot and said like how did you do

that and so I want to share a little bit

of what I shared with them with you

because I think especially at the phase

they were at you know you're you're at 1

million in Revenue 3 million to 8

million it's all that you have to get

past yourself you know and so you have

to Not Just Master yourself and manage

yourself you have to be able to do it to

such a degree that you can do it for

others as well and so I want to share a

few beliefs of mine and they're not

tactics this is just highlevel

Frameworks of how I think about having a

team and being a leader that I hope can

help you the first thing that I believe

that I think helps me be a better leader

is that if I give discretionary effort I

will get it in return and I will not

wait on somebody to give me

discretionary effort I will give it to

them before I've observed anything for

example when I was a personal trainer um

I read a book about how to get like

about how to keep your clients and how

to make them absolutely love you as a

trainer and it was one of the best books

I've ever read but it talked about

putting the extra thought into the

person rather than looking at somebody

as just your client that you're there to

like put through exercises and put on a

diet you know what's their home life

like what are their best friends names

when's their birthday what's going on in

their life what are they celebrating

what's relevant are they moving moving

are they having any big life changes and

the thing that I kept thinking about was

that's already stuff that I really like

doing as a person and so that couldn't

be too hard and so I made a little

calendar so for each of my clients I

knew when their birthdays were when

their anniversaries were what holidays

they celebrate and didn't celebrate um

when big stuff was going on in their

life it wasn't even just that I had to

like send them a gift for everything but

it's that I would bring it up and I

would mention it and I would let them

know that I was thinking about them and

those same principles that I use to

basically keep 100% of my clients at any

point in time are the same principles

that I've applied to having a team which

is it's not just looking at them as

somebody that works for you and looking

at them as somebody who you get

something from because you give them

money but it's looking at them as the

holistic person that they are and

actually being invested in that person

and I think that what I've realized is

that in the beginning I didn't really

understand how to teach this um and or a

term that would even indicate what it is

but what it really is it's it's

discretionary effort it's the fact that

when I'm taking a shower I think about

the fact that you know my assistant who

was living in this house in this

neighborhood she didn't like just got

one that she really likes and like what

could I get for her to decorate that

house with what could she what could I

do to help her welcome into that home I

should tell her to take a few days off I

should I could get her this kind of gift

I could get her that like I want to

reach out to her husband and ask him

like what could I get her and so it's

those moments where you don't have to be

thinking about somebody on your team but

you want to because you care about about

them because you act as though you care

and then eventually you will and so I

think a lot of times when people say

like oh I don't really care about my

team like that well if you never act

like you care then you don't actually

show yourself if you will and a lot of

times you can think your way into an

action or you can act your way into a

thought and I think that for me I have

always uh especially with somebody who's

new on the team I act my way into a

thought which is if I display that I

care and I act like I care eventually I

really do when I say Act until you care

what a lot of people do is when they

bring somebody on they act like they

don't care and they're actually waiting

for some sort of sign which they don't

even know what it is that they should

care about this person they should trust

them but you're actually perpetuating

the not caring and the not trusting by

not acting like you do and so it's like

what would somebody who cares what would

they do they would message the person on

their first day they would send them

something nice they would get them a

swag bag immediately they would hold a

one one with them quickly so they can

greet them on the team they would say hi

to them every time they saw them they

would ask them how their first day was

their first week was they would offer

them and see if they need anything right

and what you'll see is that if you act

like you don't care you're more likely

to demonstrate to that person that you

don't which then they act like they

don't care which then perpetuates the

cycle right and so it only takes one

person to change a relationship and if

you're the leader in the company that's

on you to do and one thing you can do is

demonstrate that you care for people and

eventually they will demonstrate back

that they care for you you know there's

been a few times in my career where this

has made a dramatic difference in my

business one of which is I had a sales

team and the manager over the sales team

this is at jym launch um he was doing a

terrible job just to be honest and so

what happened was I looked at the sales

team and I could tell that he did not

care about the sales team he didn't care

about them as people he was constantly

just drilling them and driving them to

make sales like despite what made their

personal life look like despite what was

going on at home despite any way that

they were feeling if they were sick if

they had a vacation like he cared not at

all and so you know I I went to Alex and

I was like listen like I think we have

to flip this guy out we need a complete

cultural shift here and I think that we

could literally like 2x the production

of this team if we just had a manager

who gave a and so I brought in a

new manager and I'm not even joking

within literally a week we doubled our

sales production

doubled and when I asked the team what

did why did we double production they

said we don't have somebody constantly

breathing down in our necks and we feel

like we have freedom we feel like we

have autonomy we feel like we're being

heard and it's just you know what they

says it's a way better Vibe right and

what does vibe mean it's just like you

now don't have an manager who's

interfering with your work you have

somebody who's making you want to work

more and they do that by giving

discretion effort the second belief that

I have about people that has allowed me

to build a team that I really truly love

working with is that I do not believe

people are stupid I believe that most

people are just bad teachers a lot of

really astute leaders um and business

people and entrepreneurs have this

belief and they say this all the time

they're like I think I just hired a

bunch of dumb asses I think I hired a

bunch of stupid people I think I and

it's like every time I hear that the

first thought that pops in my mind is

they're not stupid you just don't know

how to teach you just don't know how to

train you just don't know how to

reinforce behaviors like it's not like

everyone comes in this world dumb as

hell and so and you know then the second

thought is like you also hired them so

what's that say about you um but the

belief that I've always taken on and is

served me more than has not is that

people are trainable when people come

into a business either they come in

fresh not knowing much at all or they

come in doing what they've been trained

to do by somebody else and maybe that

person was an idiot and trained them po

does that mean that they're an idiot no

most people can learn most things and

holding that belief has helped me way

more than it has hurt me because I have

seen people that were teenagers and so

young and so inexperienced do things

better than somebody who's had 20 years

of experience just because I've believed

that they had the ability to learn and

I've also instilled that belief in other

leaders in my company I think the

underlying skill that's needed to teach

well is actually your ability to give

feedback

and when I say give feedback it's really

just

identifying what good looks like where

somebody's at and what's the discrepancy

and being able to communicate that in a

way that is not punishing but instead

encouraging to somebody um and I think a

lot of traditional leadership goes in

the opposite direction which is we dwell

on what somebody's done wrong we dwell

on that somebody's not doing well and we

keep them stuck in thisy of feeling like

acting like feeling like like

in out right and I think what

the best leaders do the best teachers do

is they're really meticulous about

presenting feedback in a way that does

not feel personal and in a way

that anchors the goal and in my opinion

the best teachers are able to one know

the goal of every student right like

what's your personal goal and then

they're able to tie every piece of

feedback to that personal goal which

means hey I know that you want to be coo

one day right yeah right I want to be

coo one day great so yesterday you did

this a COO would have handled it like

this what do you think the difference is

and then I'll ask them to tell me where

the discrepancy is I would say that's

one of the most effective ways that you

can give feedback as a leader because a

lot of times we give feedback I think

traditional advice puts you on opposite

sides of the table and when you're on

opposite sides of the table with

somebody feels like your competitors

rather than teammates and I think in

order to make it feel like we're on the

same team headed in the same direction

you have to be able to present it in a

way that is getting them towards

something they want rather than having

them run away from something they don't

want I'll give you an example when this

was really real for me in a recent

situation is I had a leader in my

company and that leader ran a division

and he was constantly you know almost

micromanaging the team he had a team of

five and you know I started to realize

like this is not looking good I don't

know if this guy's the guy and I knew

because one day he sent me a message and

he was like NE is a dumbass and dropped

the ball on X Y and Z and her ex her

presentation was horrific and and I was

like this is really bad and so you know

this entire time he'd been telling me

how he couldn't get out of the weeds

because his team was so dumb and I just

knew I was like that's not it I was like

his team is not dumb he doesn't know how

to teach them how to do anything and if

anything he suppresses them and so I let

that person go and I promoted somebody

from within and what that person did was

they allowed everybody to display the

level of competence that was already

there um and he did that because he

believed in people and so he actually

put the effort in to train people and to

teach people and because he did that

what we saw was that we did not have a

team of dumb asses we actually had a

team of leaders of people who now a year

and a half later are all prominent

leaders in my company and so the

difference was that one guy thought that

people were dumb and stupid and the

other guy thought that people believed

in his team and knew he could teach them

so like that's the difference that this

kind of belief makes so if you you're

saying to yourself right now like my

team is dumb I want you to take a look

in the mirror and say like are you even

a good teacher do you how to teach

people really and if you don't even know

what the word teach means you probably

don't you know another example of this

is I had a Director of Finance at gym

launch and that Director of Finance um

had a team of six people and she kept

saying that they you know they weren't

smart enough and she need to hire more

people and like she can't get anything

done and and so I actually ended up

bringing in a CFO and having her swap

out that Director of Finance and that

CFO literally ran the same team

and with her leadership coming in and

telling me she's like listen they' just

been trained wrong like this isn't

they're fine like they're fine they

haven't been told what to do well they

don't have Clarity they haven't been

trained because I was like listen are

they the right people like you know all

I've heard is bad things for the last

six months and so she came in and I

really didn't know what to think at

first but within a period of eight

months you know we went from having

financials delivered 30 days after we

closed the books to having financials

within three days of the month being

closed we went from having quite

literally like a show of data to

having an entire dashboard that was

delivered to me on a bi-weekly on a

weekly basis and we went from having a

culture where everyone just seemed like

they deferred to their leader to having

many leaders within the

department and so again you know it

wasn't because and you know in this

instance my Director of Finance didn't

believe people were dumb but she was not

a good teacher right and so simply

swapping somebody who is a bad teacher

out for somebody who's a good teacher I

got to actually tap into the potential

of the team that already existed the

third belief that I hold about

leadership is that a core piece of

leadership is that you invest in people

as if they will never leave but know and

even hope that they will a lot of

leaders the reason that they don't they

will never have the culture that they

want is because they are too afraid of

investing in people and then leaving

they're more afraid of that than they

are of not investing in people and them

staying and a lot of times what people

say is like I get I get what you're

saying Lea but what if I put all this

energy into someone and and then they

leave and it's like oh yes so what if

you invest all this energy into making

someone's life better you make them a

better person and then they leave does

that mean that you've done a bad job

like there's a lot of reasons that it

can be good for somebody to leave a

company now are we saying that we want

that every instance of course not we

want people to stay when we love working

with people and we like them but the

point of it is is that this belief

prevents so many people from putting the

effort into their team that actually

builds an amazing culture and so

something that I've always kept

Forefront of mind for myself is invest

in them as if they will never leave but

be happy when they do because and I

think this again like I don't know if

this is you know this is just what's

personal to me but it's like my

reputation that I have with myself is I

don't want the relationship to just be

good while somebody works for me but I

want someone to feel like when they

don't work for me if they choose to

leave or go somewhere else like I'm

still somebody that they can look to

that they can uh consider a mentor po

that they could call when something bad

happens um because again like it's

thinking about the person first rather

than just the relationship as your

employee and I think that you know and

maybe this is a point again is like I

like being an employer because I like

being a mentor to people and so I can

remain somebody's Mentor even if they

don't work for me and that's okay with

me because sometimes things are going to

happen in your business where you can't

give somebody the growth they're looking

for or maybe

they decide that they want something

that you don't have an opportunity for

that in your business or maybe you're

not an experienced enough leader that

the vision you have for the business is

not big enough to fit their Vision they

have for themselves and so an example of

this is when I was running gym launch um

we had a guy and he was in the sales

department and he was he'd worked side

by side with us since we had first

started in fact when we were flying out

to gyms he was one of our first sales

guys and I really liked him and so we

got a really good we built a very good

relationship and I definitely put a lot

of disc discretionary effort towards him

you know not just educating him on sales

but just in general and I want to say

about 4 and a half years into working

for us um him and his wife started a

business on the side and I found out

about three or four months after they'

started it because we were at our team

Meetup and he was on the phone I guess

he was talking to his wife I was saying

going off the business and I went to him

and I was like what are you doing and he

was like oh my gosh I you know I I'm not

quitting like I still want to work here

like I just you know also want to have

this business so like I don't want you

to be upset like BL and I was like bro

you need to quit and he was like what

what are you talking about like I love

this team I want to and I was like no no

no I was like you're done like you have

gotten so much over the last four and a

half years and if I felt like you

weren't ready to have your own business

and do this I would tell you because

most of the time people aren't but you

are ready I was like go do it take the

risk like put in your 30 days just help

help me backfill you that's all I asked

but like go do it

and he that's what he did he put in his

notice and we had about 30 days of

transition you he helped backfill

himself and you know we've remained in

touch since and I've talked to him on

the phone many times since then given

him advice on his business you know he's

gone through the ups and the downs and

all those things you know but like at

the end of the day do I consider that a

loss that I made someone's life better

no of course not I consider that a win

and I consider that like the brand I

wish to have with myself which is it

doesn't just go

like the relationship doesn't end with

when somebody isn't working for me but

it's a relationship that I can have for

the rest of my life as hopefully their

Mentor or somebody they look up to now

here's the thing on the other side of

that you know what happened right before

that was I had somebody that I invested

a lot into she was my director of HR and

we were very close um we actually pretty

close in age which I think a lot of

times you're close in age you have a lot

of similar interests and hobbies like

usually become closer on a team and

because you have more in common right

and I put so much into her and she kind

of came in with little experience and I

as much as I could gave her everything

in my brain right and she became almost

like my right hand and she was my right

hand for about two years and she was

somebody that I saw really ascending in

the company like I was like one day she

could even be like a COO or an operator

like there's all these big dreams I had

for her and I had spent so much time

training her that when I got a text

message um it was the more morning

before I was going to be letting someone

go it was a screenshot of her telling

that person I was going to let them go

and warning them and saying they didn't

agree with it and I remember in that

moment I was just absolutely just so

upset because I couldn't believe that

I'd put two years of my life into this

person and this

happened and I remember after that

happened and we parted ways I remember

thinking like I have a choice right now

because I feel terrible I feel like I

was betrayed I feel like I don't want to

trust anybody I feel like I was taken

advantage of and you know I looked at it

as just a numbers game which is you know

if I bring 10 people in and I invest in

all 10 of them it's probably going to

pay off with like seven to eight of them

and then for two to three they might end

up just like completely me up

completely me or leaving early

or something right but I don't want

those three incidences to rob me of the

seven and so I made a decision in that

moment I was like I will continue to

trust people and I will continue to

invest in people and it doesn't matter

that I feel like this is part of

the game and this is the price I pay to

have a team that I love working with is

that I have to bear these moments where

I feel betrayed and that is just the

cost of having an amazing team is that

because you build an amazing team

through really investing in people and

trusting people you're ultimately going

to have to bear the cost of when you

invest and Trust in the wrong people and

that's okay that's just part of it and I

think that has served me more than it

has not served me in business the last

belief that I hold about leadership and

definitely not the last but the last I'm

going to have for this video is if you

want people to show up and to be their

best then you have to be at your best

and so I think a lot of leadership in my

opinion a lot of the books I read early

on a lot of the leaders that I listen to

to it's not that they told me what to do

it's that they inspired me by who they

were and that has always been something

that has been top of mind for me and I

probably put more time into that than I

do into any tactic is how can I be

someone of such character that I earn

the respect of other people of High

character how can I be somebody who

people don't just look to for business

advice but life advice because I am able

to manage myself and to manage my life

and I think a lot of what creates a

leader that people look up to and are

inspired by is somebody who's not just

one-dimensionally good at one thing like

I I can't think of many people in life

that I look up to because they're very

good at making money right like do I

follow do I like watch some of your

videos maybe sure like I'll watch videos

for money but am I inspired by you do

you inspire me to want to follow you

would I move across the country to work

for you probably not because I don't

because I don't see the rest of your

life and I think a lot of the times

something I've distinguished and I've

continued to teach people on my team is

I believe the best leaders Inspire in

all facets of life um you know it's not

just one area but they're able to manage

themselves in all the other areas of

life as well and so I've always tried to

do that and I think that probably stems

from you know I got into fitness I lost

a lot of weight I worked on my mindset I

tried to work through managing my

emotions there's just been a lot of

things in my life that I've tried to do

to better myself and I've seen it pay

off when I ended up starting a company

because I already had the skills to help

myself therefore I was able to help

others you know I remember first uh the

first time in my career when I realized

that essentially just how I showed up

for my team would train them on how they

showed up for me was I was on a call

with about 10 of my teammates the team

was literally like 10 people for gym

launch and I showed up every day in

sweatpants and a hoodie with no makeup

my hair and a bun and I remember looking

at my team one day and thinking like

dude they all look like they just rolled

the out of bed and I was like

that's kind of embarrassing like I don't

want a company that looks like this I

remember I literally looked at the call

and then I was like oh you look like

this you look like you just rolled out

of bed therefore they all think it's

acceptable and so what I realized is

like it doesn't matter what I say it

doesn't matter what rules are in place

it doesn't matter matter what the

employee handbook says what you do sets

the standard for what's tolerable and

acceptable for the rest of the team

because people don't listen to what you

say they follow what you do and how you

show up and so I literally I started

doing my hair I started doing my makeup

and guess what happened I didn't say

I didn't tell anybody to show up

any different way within a month

everybody started showing up differently

everyone looked better they had their

hair done they had makeup on they didn't

look like they just roll out the bread

they looked like they brushed their

teeth and I was like holy crap like that

really works like I don't have to say

anything it's just how I show up that

will dictate how others do another

example of this is throughout the entire

time my own gym launch one of the main

objectives I also had especially because

we were a company centered around

Fitness was like I don't want people to

join my company and be less healthy and

I think there's a lot of times where

people join a company and other pieces

of their life fall to the Wayside and so

what I did was I I had a walking

treadmill and I would constantly be

walking on calls and what I found is

that all of a sudden you started looking

and over like a span of like six months

after I got the treadmill and there was

one day when like three qus of our team

was on a walking treadmill because they

were like oh I didn't know that was okay

I can have a walking treadmill and

what's so funny is that then everyone

started losing weight and everyone

started getting healthier and then

eventually we started doing step

challenges as a team because we're like

this is pretty cool and I had like

testimonials from my team about how much

weight they lost working on the team

because we promoted a healthy

environment how did I promote a healthy

environment I didn't go say go eat

healthy and diet I just did it myself

and displayed it and so it's not what we

say it's what we demonstrate to our

teams and I think what it does it also

allows people

to put importance on other areas of

their life when you demonstrate that you

do that for yourself I hope that these

Frameworks or these principles help you

guys

I um I know they're not like fully

flushed out but I'm really I really want

to do a better job of figuring out how

to operationalize leadership because

like what irks me is like a lot of the

traditional leadership is like be honest

be trustworthy be these things one

nobody knows what those things mean and

then two nobody knows how do you

tactically do that and so I am going to

put more effort towards figuring out how

to translate this down because at the

end of the day the hardest part of

building a culture is not it's not in

the process it's not in some project

management system it's not in the CRM

it's not any of the tactics it's in who

you are as a leader and how you show up

for your team and I have just seen like

as I have become a better person I've

learned to manage my emotions more I've

learned to be kinder I've learned to be

more considerate I've learned to have

more patience I've learned to

communicate better my team has gotten

better and it's not because of Any

tactic I've deployed it's because great

people won't work for a mediocre leader

and so the better you are the better

Talent you will attract