Realise when it’s time to let go

Thewizardliz
4 Jun 202319:49

Summary

TLDRIn this heartfelt video, the speaker addresses the importance of recognizing when to let go of situations or relationships that no longer serve us. Drawing from a friend's struggle with a stagnant job, the speaker emphasizes the need to disregard sunk costs and focus on the future. She advises against falling for empty promises and manipulation, advocating for self-respect and valuing one's own worth. The speaker encourages viewers to have faith in themselves and in a higher power, to plan their exit from toxic environments, and to believe in the possibility of a better future.

Takeaways

  • 💡 Recognize when to let go: It's important to identify when you're stuck in a situation that's no longer beneficial, such as a job or relationship where growth has ceased.
  • 🚫 Avoid the Sunk Cost Fallacy: Don't let the time or energy already invested in something dictate your decision to stay; focus on the future prospects.
  • 🔍 Identify manipulation: Be aware of when people promise things but fail to deliver, a sign of manipulation that can keep you stuck.
  • 🗣️ Match actions to words: Trust people based on their actions, not just their words, as actions are a true reflection of intentions and respect.
  • 🔄 Value yourself: Don't settle for less than you deserve; demand respect and fulfillment of promises from those around you.
  • 💼 Understand the power dynamics: Realize that if you're easily accessible or loyal without reciprocation, you may not be valued as you should be.
  • 🌱 Progress for happiness: Constant progression and evolution are key to happiness; stagnation can lead to misery and depression.
  • 🔑 Take back your power: Recognize that you have the power to change your circumstances and should not give your energy away to those who do not deserve it.
  • 🛑 Plan your exit strategy: If you decide to leave a job or relationship, have a plan in place to ensure a smooth transition.
  • 🔗 Maintain connections: Don't isolate yourself from loved ones for the sake of a toxic relationship or job; they can provide support when you need it most.
  • 🌟 Have faith in change: Believe in yourself and the possibility of a better future; let go of fear and embrace the potential for positive change.

Q & A

  • What is the main theme of the video?

    -The main theme of the video is about the importance of letting go, recognizing when to leave a situation that is no longer serving you, and how to do so.

  • Why does the speaker feel compelled to make this video?

    -The speaker felt called to make this video after helping a friend who was struggling with the decision to leave a job that had become stagnant and unfulfilling.

  • What is the Sunk Cost Fallacy as mentioned in the video?

    -The Sunk Cost Fallacy is the tendency to continue a behavior or endeavor because of the time, effort, or money already invested, rather than evaluating the current and future value of that endeavor.

  • What advice does the speaker give regarding manipulation in relationships or at work?

    -The speaker advises to recognize manipulation when promises are not fulfilled and to stop believing in words that do not match actions.

  • How does the speaker define self-respect in the context of the video?

    -Self-respect, in the context of the video, is about valuing oneself, not tolerating manipulation, and not staying in situations where one's needs and desires are not met.

  • What is the speaker's view on the importance of making people prove themselves?

    -The speaker believes that making people prove themselves through their actions is crucial for valuing oneself and ensuring that one is not taken for granted.

  • Why does the speaker emphasize not wasting time on people who do not add value to your life?

    -The speaker emphasizes this because time is valuable and limited, and spending it on people who do not contribute positively to one's life can lead to regret and missed opportunities.

  • What does the speaker suggest is a common mistake people make when leaving a toxic situation?

    -A common mistake is going back to the toxic situation after leaving it, which the speaker advises against, as it can prevent personal growth and new opportunities.

  • How does the speaker describe the process of planning an exit from a negative situation?

    -The speaker suggests that planning an exit involves assessing one's needs, seeking support if necessary, and having faith in oneself or a higher power to provide for one's future.

  • What message does the speaker convey about change and personal growth?

    -The speaker conveys that change is a natural part of life and personal growth, and that it's never too late to change direction or pursue a different path that aligns with one's true desires.

  • What is the speaker's perspective on the role of faith in making life changes?

    -The speaker believes that having faith in oneself, in God, or in the universe is essential when making life changes, as it provides the courage to let go of what is not serving you and embrace new opportunities.

Outlines

00:00

💡 Realizing When to Let Go

The speaker begins by sharing an impromptu decision to create a video on the topic of letting go. They recount helping a friend who felt stuck in a job for seven years without growth or fulfillment. The speaker emphasizes the importance of recognizing when a situation is no longer beneficial and introduces the 'Sunk Cost Fallacy,' which advises against basing decisions on past investments of time or energy. They stress the need to assess the future prospects of a situation rather than past efforts. The speaker also discusses the manipulation that can occur when promises are not kept, advising the audience to value themselves and not to be swayed by false promises or empty words.

05:01

🚫 Avoiding Manipulation and Self-Respect

Continuing the theme of self-worth, the speaker warns against manipulation in both professional and personal relationships. They argue that actions should be the measure of a person's intent, not words. The speaker criticizes the tendency to make excuses for others' inaction and to tolerate disrespect due to fear of being alone. They advocate for self-respect and caution against wasting time on people who do not value or respect you. The speaker encourages the audience to seek out relationships and work environments that add value to their lives, not detract from it.

10:03

🔄 The Importance of Change and Progress

The speaker discusses the negative impacts of stagnation, citing an example of a friend whose job has led to personal and familial strife. They argue that work should enhance life, not dominate it, and that individuals should not sacrifice their personal relationships for professional gains. The speaker also touches on the topic of family, advising against alienating loved ones for the sake of a toxic partner. They stress the importance of progression in life, as lack of it can lead to unhappiness and depression. The speaker encourages change and adaptation, suggesting that it's never too late to redirect one's path.

15:03

🌱 Embracing Change and Trusting the Journey

In the final paragraph, the speaker shares a personal story of letting go of a financially supportive but emotionally unfulfilling relationship to make space for a healthier one. They advocate for having faith in oneself and in a higher power, emphasizing that letting go of what is not serving you is crucial for personal growth and attracting better circumstances. The speaker encourages taking risks and being uncomfortable as part of the process of evolving and living a fulfilling life. They conclude by expressing love for their audience and the importance of sharing this message, despite the informal setting.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Letting go

Letting go refers to the act of releasing or relinquishing something, often with a sense of acceptance. In the video's context, it is about recognizing when to move on from a situation that no longer serves one's well-being. The speaker uses the example of a friend stuck in a job for seven years, feeling miserable, and realizing the need to let go for personal growth and happiness.

💡Sunk cost fallacy

The sunk cost fallacy is a cognitive bias where people continue an action because of the investment already made, rather than evaluating the current and future value. The video emphasizes that one should not stay in a job or relationship based on past time or energy spent, but rather on the potential for a better future, countering the fallacy by advocating for future-oriented decisions.

💡Manipulation

Manipulation is the act of influencing someone to act in a desired way by unfair or deceptive means. The video discusses how recognizing when someone is making promises without follow-through is a form of manipulation, and it's crucial to identify and leave such situations to avoid being controlled or taken advantage of.

💡Self-respect

Self-respect is the value one places on oneself, which includes not tolerating poor treatment from others and recognizing one's worth. The speaker argues that by not accepting manipulation or mistreatment, one demonstrates self-respect and values their own well-being, which is essential for personal growth and happiness.

💡Toxic relationships

Toxic relationships are those that have a negative impact on one's mental, emotional, or physical health. The video script mentions the importance of leaving such relationships, as they can lead to unhappiness and a lack of self-worth, and contrasts them with healthy, supportive connections.

💡Value

In the context of the video, value refers to the worth or importance that one places on something or someone. The speaker suggests that people and companies often do not value what is easily obtained or those who are too loyal without receiving what they deserve, highlighting the need to demand respect and value in all interactions.

💡Progression

Progression is the act of moving forward or advancing, which is linked to happiness and fulfillment in life. The video emphasizes that stagnation leads to unhappiness and that seeking progression, whether in a career or personal life, is vital for maintaining a sense of purpose and direction.

💡Self-empowerment

Self-empowerment is the process of becoming more confident in one's own abilities and making decisions for oneself. The speaker encourages taking back power from toxic situations or people, trusting in one's ability to provide for oneself, and making choices that lead to a better life.

💡Isolation

Isolation refers to the state of being alone or separated from others. The video warns against the dangers of isolating oneself from supportive networks like family and friends due to a toxic partner or job, as it can lead to a loss of perspective and increased vulnerability to manipulation.

💡Manifestation

Manifestation is the idea of bringing something into reality through belief and focused thought. The speaker shares a personal story of letting go of an unsatisfactory relationship, which allowed for the manifestation of a more fulfilling partnership, illustrating the power of faith and the importance of letting go to make room for positive change.

💡Evolution

Evolution, in the context of the video, refers to personal growth and development over time. The speaker stresses that life is about constant learning and evolving, and that stagnation equates to no longer living fully. This concept is tied to the idea that change and letting go of what no longer serves us are necessary for our soul's evolution.

Highlights

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Transcripts

play00:00

hi guys I know this is not my usual

play00:03

setting but I was actually going to bed

play00:05

and um I felt called to do this video

play00:08

and it's basically about letting go

play00:11

knowing when to let go and uh how to let

play00:15

go

play00:16

and the reason why I want to do this

play00:18

video is because for the past days I

play00:20

have been helping a friend of mine

play00:22

giving him advice on how to let go of a

play00:25

job that he has been working at for

play00:27

seven years and it's like his career

play00:31

field and he just stopped growing in

play00:34

that career so he began to feel

play00:36

miserable

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and

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um the boss kept promising him stuff but

play00:42

never delivering on it and he basically

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told me Elizabeth what should I do and I

play00:46

told him you have to leave you know when

play00:49

you're stuck in a situation like that

play00:51

where you're miserable people are

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promising your stuff they're not

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delivering on it or you're stuck in a

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relationship what you need to do you

play00:59

need to think about I was reading this

play01:01

book yeah in the art of thinking clearly

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it talked about something it's called

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the Suncoast fallacy Suncoast cells he

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basically means you don't have to look

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at how much time or energy you spent

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into something as a reason as why you

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should stay you should look at what is

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the future of this thing

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like it doesn't matter how much time or

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energy you put in if the future of it is

play01:27

not going to get better if if you have

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put years into that relationship and

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energy and whatever but you're unhappy

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and you see your future in that

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relationship being unhappy then there's

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no point in staying if the same with

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with the company or your work if it's

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not going up there's no point in staying

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first thing I think what you should do

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is realize when you're being manipulated

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when a person is promising you stuff and

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never delivering on it you are being

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manipulated if someone is telling you

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even if a boss is telling you yeah you

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will get this position if you do this

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then you do that thing and you still

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don't get that position that's

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manipulation because it like they're

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promising you stuff but they're never

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delivering on it you know same way in a

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relationship they're promising you to

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change they're promising you that

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they'll do better or whatever it won't

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happen again but then it does make

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manipulation

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they're just saying anything to make you

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stay if if the words don't match the

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actions you leave you guys need to stop

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believing people on words people are

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full of okay let's be honest

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here like it's so easy to lie why would

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not everyone lie you know if I wanted to

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keep a girl but I know I I like I'm not

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serious with her but I can't just sleep

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around with her I would also lie to her

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to make her stay you know why not if I

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can why not you know most most people

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don't feel bad when they do that and you

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need to realize that not everyone has a

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good heart or morals or or feel feels

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bad about the stuff no most people don't

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and you guys need to start realizing

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that the world is really harsh when the

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words do not match the action see I had

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so many people in my life screaming to

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me Liz I love you I love you but then

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they would do stuff to me that was so

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shitty that I would think like how is

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this love you know and then you have me

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I'm verbally I don't say that much like

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oh I love you but I will always showed

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my actions that I respect you I love you

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and I'm loyal to you like my actions

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will always show

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I don't talk I show you and that's how

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you have to look at people look at your

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boss is are they just talking all right

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are they actually giving me what I want

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and what they promised me look at your

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relationship the same way other thing is

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what they can easily get will never be

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valued okay and also if you're easy like

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if you're loyal to a company that is

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literally not giving you what you want

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but promising making false promises also

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they will not value you because see with

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my friend the issue was what his boss

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did is he promised proms promise never

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delivered but the boss knew the guy

play04:10

would never leave he's so loyal to this

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company he knew he would not leave so he

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knew this Behavior could go on for years

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and years without him really doing

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anything you know and they would even

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say like oh no he will never leave

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doesn't matter whatever that's how these

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people start to disrespect you

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start to Value yourself you know start

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to Value what you want and what you

play04:33

think that you deserve relationships

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don't get too easily with people make

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them literally work for you make people

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prove especially if you're going into

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relationship with a man make that man

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prove to you that he's worthy of being

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with you because in this day and age and

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I truly believe this is the issue with

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most relationships these days is because

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we we've created this whole thing of

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like oh no uh they don't have to do

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anything anymore everything's equal this

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and that so then you have men that don't

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want to show up and be men anymore

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they're just like okay whatever I I

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don't have to do anything so they're not

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going to do anything and even worse they

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want to take from the woman now yes I do

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believe in equality I do believe a man

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and a woman should be equal and and I'm

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happy if that's the way it is but at the

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end of the day if if you like make it so

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easy for a man to get with you and he

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doesn't have to do anything at all and

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he can still be in a relationship with

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you they will abuse that power

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they will abuse that power and that is

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not an that's not equality you know

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because again they're more powerful over

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you because you're giving yourself away

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for nothing this person doesn't even

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appreciate you respect you doesn't do

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anything for you and you're just giving

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yourself you're giving your time value

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yourself making someone uh literally

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prove to you that they're a good person

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with their actions is valuing yourself

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that is self-respect there's just

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nothing worse than wasted time wasted

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time on people don't waste your time

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your your time is valuable you guys like

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literally I've heard so many older

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people say time flies like this

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today you're 20 years old tomorrow

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you're 80 and it flies like this don't

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waste your time on dumb people don't

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waste your time on dumb people don't put

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your energy into people that promise you

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stuff don't deliver don't go to people

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that don't respect you or are toxic

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because you're lonely and you don't have

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anyone so I'll just stay with them

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but then you end up being miserable

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again they're taking away from you

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they're taking away from your years and

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you end up feeling bad about yourself

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you end up feeling insecure and thinking

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that you cannot do anything bad those

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kind of bosses those kind of

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relationship people what they will do is

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they will make it seem like you are this

play06:51

is the only good thing you will ever get

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like you cannot get any better than this

play06:54

and that is just such like that's one of

play06:57

the things they do with their

play06:58

manipulation yeah they have to make you

play07:01

feel like you cannot get do anything

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better so that toxic partner will make

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you feel like you cannot get anyone

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better than him or anyone that treats

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you decency and respect they will make

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you actually believe that or your job

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they will make you believe that oh you

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cannot get anywhere better you will not

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be paid better you will not get the same

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uh respect or position whatever that's

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such like stop listening to

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these people it's not true it's not true

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in order to control you they have to

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make you feel this small but you have

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the power to take you to take that back

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and be like no you know what I deserve

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much better and I'm capable of much

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better and yes I can get much better

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than you and you can there's literally

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billions of people in this world and you

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think this one douchebag is your only

play07:45

option please

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there's literally so many companies you

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can start your own company there's so

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many options in this world money is only

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an energy if you start to understand

play07:55

money in an energetic way you also start

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to realize it doesn't have to be this

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hard stock six people constantly benefit

play08:01

from putting you down and making you

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feel this small but like stop it has to

play08:05

stop and the only Power you have right

play08:07

now is to take your own power back you

play08:10

gave away your power to those people

play08:12

those people are not powerful without

play08:15

your energy that you gave to them that

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company is nothing without you that

play08:22

company needs you you don't need them

play08:24

that toxic person needs you you don't

play08:27

need them

play08:28

you think anyone wants to be with

play08:31

someone that treats them like

play08:33

nobody wants to do that so when they're

play08:36

telling you you can't do anything better

play08:38

they're actually projecting onto you

play08:40

they can't do anything better that

play08:42

company cannot find a better employee

play08:44

than you that partner cannot find a

play08:47

better partner than you because you're

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the only one that wants to put up with

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their stuff nobody else wants to do that

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whether it's a company whether it's a

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relationship that thing whatever it is

play08:58

should always add to your life and not

play09:01

take away from it

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for example

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the my friend that works for the company

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he completely doesn't have any time

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anymore for his friends or family

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constantly working constantly working

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became miserable his relationships are

play09:16

failing

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um so and he doesn't even make enough

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money to make up for that you know so

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it's like his relationships are

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completely failing and the company is

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taking away from his relationship his

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personal life it shouldn't do that if

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you're doing a job that job should add

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you should make your money and and you

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should like you should still have your

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life you should still have be able to

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keep your relationships and the same way

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you know I'm gonna say one thing have a

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partner and you have a good family that

play09:48

cares about you and your family says

play09:51

that this guy is not good for you or

play09:54

this girl is not good for you and they

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can see it and and you actually also

play09:57

know there's kind of red flags but you

play10:00

still choose that partner over your

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family and you lose your family because

play10:05

you chose that partner that's a dumb

play10:07

decision I'm gonna say it here that's a

play10:10

dumb decision if you have a good family

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I'm not talking about toxic families if

play10:14

you have a family that actually cares

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about you once that toxic person that

play10:18

got you away from your family knows that

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you don't have anyone anymore and you're

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not communicating with your family

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anymore you're done you're done

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you're literally like caged for them

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because they have all control now every

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time you want to leave they'll say where

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do you want to go you don't have anyone

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they they literally feed off of this you

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cannot catch me go against literally the

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people that I love because of a man

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honestly truly actually had friends

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co-workers people that I used to know

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tell me that they did this when when

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they had a good family and they said it

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was the worst decision of my life the

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person became abusive the person

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literally did anything and everything to

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me

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and um yeah at the end of the day they

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felt isolated so much trauma coming out

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of it because you're not talking to

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anyone anymore you don't have anyone to

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go to now you only have this one toxic

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person and you're isolated with them

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with them yeah sometimes people around

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you that love you you might feel like oh

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they're going against me they don't know

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what they're talking about whatever

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sometimes they know better believe me

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trust me I have seen it with my own eyes

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not with one case I've seen multiple

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cases like this

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sometimes your loved ones know better

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but realize that it's okay to change

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your mind you don't have to do things

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like one way or just because you studied

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this and you're in this in this company

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and you did this job but you don't feel

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good there and you want to do something

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else it's okay to do something else you

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know it's never too late to change

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direction you will anyways go where

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you're meant to go or where your

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intuition leads you you will get there

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but maybe it's not a straight line maybe

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you have to go like this or try

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different things to in order for you to

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just be like oh this is what I want to

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do I was watching this interview from

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Tony Robbins and Tony Robbins was

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basically talking about uh humans get

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unhappy and depressed when they stop

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progressing in life

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progression is literally what makes us

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happy that's why even if you look at

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people that are at the top they have

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millions and millions they you might

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look at them and see whoa oh my God they

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accomplished everything but they're

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miserable why do you think that is they

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stopped progressing in life they don't

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have that drive anymore because they

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have everything so we constantly need to

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find that thing that drives us need to

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find that thing that makes us want want

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to involve and when you feel like it's

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not okay to change your mind or you have

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to stay this way because this is what

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you've been taught and whatever you'll

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become miserable at the end of the day

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because you know that this is not what

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you want and second of all you feel like

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you're not progressing because this is

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not even what you want to begin with you

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don't even want to progress in this

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thing so you're stuck and you will

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really become miserable start thinking

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about okay maybe this was not what I

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wanted I tried this but this is not what

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I want this relationship I tried it but

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this is not what I want I want something

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else it's okay to change your mind it's

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okay we are here on Earth to constantly

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evolve when you stop evolving that's

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when you stop living so once you made

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that decision for yourself that you have

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to let go you plan your exit okay if

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you're in that company and you want to

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leave what you do is you search for

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another job in another company or maybe

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you're like okay I don't want to work

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for now I'm going to take off and travel

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or whatever or I'm gonna do whatever you

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can also do that uh whatever you want to

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do but plan your exit

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plan your exit in a relationship if this

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is really not what you want okay you

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start thinking about how can I get out

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of this relationship do you need

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financial do you need money

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um whatever you need maybe you can find

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family members friends anyone that can

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help you to get out plan your exit you

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do not stay where respect is not served

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you do not stay where you're manipulated

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you do not stay where you're miserable

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once you have let go and you close that

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door you do not open that door again

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and why am I saying this listen I used

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to constantly when I was I had an ex me

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and my ex were good friends but

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um he would constantly like he would

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take care of me financially when I was

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really really broke and I really needed

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him but I didn't like the relationship

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anymore and there was no love and I

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wanted to leave I I constantly would

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like ask God like please give me someone

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that I love that they get scared of me

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um but that would never happen and I

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would constantly be stuck with this

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partner so what happened is I literally

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in a moment where I was my Brokers I was

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like you know what I have to let go of

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my ex otherwise the person that is meant

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for me can never come in so what I did

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is I was like okay I'm just gonna let go

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of him I don't care that I literally

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have no money you know without him so

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then I let him go and then literally

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like uh a year later I met my partner

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now and he's literally what I've wanted

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and what I've prayed prayed for so in

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order for that manifestation to come in

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that you want about maybe the partner or

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or the job that you want you need to let

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go of the thing that's not serving you

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if the thing right now is not what you

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want but you just hold on to it because

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it's comfortable

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you have to have faith and let go

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because I really really believe if you

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don't believe in God believe in yourself

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if if whether it's the universe

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something else I don't know I really

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believe God has a bigger plan really

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honestly I I believe God has a bigger

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plan and I think the things we ask for

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are just pathetic and he has like such a

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big plan and we can have like huge huge

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stuff but where we don't think that we

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can have it so we never Attract it and

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this is what I told my friend as well

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I'm like you have to show God that you

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trust him you know you have you don't

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have to be afraid to let go of this

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toxic uh job that you have right now and

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uh be like oh no if if I don't let this

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go I will not have something else you

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will because God always provides you

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will always have always but you have to

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have some faith and if you don't believe

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in God believe in yourself you will

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provide for yourself you will you got

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yourself out of so many bad situations

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did you not like we literally went

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through so much and we're still standing

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we're still doing our stuff doing like

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trying to get better and trying to

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evolve so you're still here are you not

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why do you not believe in yourself then

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why do you not think you can get better

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every time you thought that this was the

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end and like you would never get out of

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this you got out of it didn't you why do

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you think that this time you're gonna

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fail yourself you're not trust me trust

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me once you let go once I had let go of

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all the shitty friends that I had all

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like my partner that there was no love

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anymore once I let all of that go I I

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promise you everything I ever wanted

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came in and there is no person that has

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left my life that I missed truly truly

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I'm sorry and there is no person that I

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would take back from from my previous

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life like in this like in this new

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reality that I'm living no I'm sorry I'm

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literally not but once all that that

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like unwanted is gone your true purpose

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starts to show you start to see what is

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meant for you and and literally Miracles

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start to happen because you had Faith

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you had faith in yourself you had faith

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in God and you were not afraid to take

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risks

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sometimes in life you need to get

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uncomfortable see when you're jumping

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from your presence reality to the new

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one that you want in the beginning it

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might be a little chaotic like it's not

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gonna be amazing from the get-go you

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know and you have to accept that but

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that's okay you know you've survived

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much worse much worse

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this time when you're going into this

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you actually have a plan and you have

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wisdom that you didn't have before so

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this time around it will be different I

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promise you it will be different and

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don't also think like oh no it's too

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late like my age this and that whatever

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no people have done incredible things at

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60 at 70 they've accomplished only you

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know it doesn't matter it doesn't matter

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your age doesn't matter you see age is

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just a number we are a soul you know

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it's it's all about our soul you guys

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have to realize that our souls are here

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on Earth to evolve literally and to

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learn constantly we have to learn

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once we stop learning and evolving we

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stop living

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so in order for you to do that you

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constantly have to experience new things

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you have to create those experiences for

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yourself and you don't have to be scared

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to do that

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fear stops everything instead of fear

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have faith have faith in yourself if you

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believe in God have faith in God have

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faith in the universe everything will

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work out for you at the end

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but don't do a dishonor to yourself by

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staying where you're not welcome

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anyways guys I love you guys so much I'm

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so sorry looking like this because I

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know a lot of people don't like it uh

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when I am not dressed up but honestly I

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just really wanted to share this message

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with you guys because I felt like I felt

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some of you need it

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um so yeah I love you guys so much

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bye-bye

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Related Tags
Letting GoPersonal GrowthCareer AdviceRelationship InsightsSelf-RespectManipulation AwarenessEmotional HealthLife TransitionsSelf-EmpowermentCareer Change