Finding Our Positive Self Talk | Sandra Fuentes | TEDxGoshen

TEDx Talks

10 Jun 202111:29

Summary

TLDRThe speaker shares a personal journey of self-talk and its impact on self-perception and success. They encourage the audience to transform negative self-talk into positive affirmations, illustrating the power of words through their own experiences and a story about a customer in their clothing store. The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-care and positivity, especially during challenging times. They recount the story of a grandmother who, after being encouraged to try on clothes, found joy and confidence in her appearance. The speaker also discusses the challenges they faced in their business and how they overcame them by adapting to online sales and social media marketing, demonstrating resilience and the ability to reinvent oneself in the face of adversity.

Takeaways

🗣️ The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-talk and how it affects our daily lives, encouraging the audience to reflect on their own internal dialogue.
📚 The speaker admits to talking to themselves frequently and uses it as a tool for self-reflection and motivation.
🚶‍♀️ The speaker shares personal anecdotes about tripping on stage to illustrate the power of negative self-talk and the need to overcome it.
🌟 The speaker owns a women's clothing and gift shop with a vision to create a judgment-free and comfortable space for customers.
🛍️ The store offers a personal shopping experience, focusing on making customers feel confident and valued.
📝 The store displays motivational signs to inspire customers and promote positive self-perception.
👵 The speaker recounts a story of helping an older woman feel beautiful and confident in her clothing, highlighting the store's impact on self-esteem.
💻 The speaker faced a period of depression and business challenges, which led to a realization about the need for change and reinvention.
🌐 In response to the challenges, the speaker pivoted the business to an online platform, embracing social media and virtual shopping to ensure survival.
🎥 The speaker had to adapt to new ways of engaging with customers, such as conducting live videos, to maintain the business's presence.
💪 The speaker concludes with a message of resilience and positivity, urging the audience to face struggles and obstacles with a committed and positive mindset.

Q & A

How often does the speaker talk to herself in a day?
-The speaker talks to herself about a hundred times a day, as she mentioned in the script.
What was the first thing the speaker said to herself this morning before opening her eyes?
-The first thing the speaker said to herself was 'breathe', followed by 'do not trip on stage'.
What is the speaker's profession and what is her vision for her business?
-The speaker owns a women's clothing store and gift shop. Her vision was to create a comfortable space where people would feel confident walking through the door without any judgment.
What is the significance of the signs in the speaker's store?
-The signs in the store are meant to convey positive messages and inspire the customers, making them feel their best and encouraging self-care.
Can you describe a specific interaction the speaker had with a customer in her store?
-The speaker shared a story about a grandmother who initially felt she was too old to wear anything in the store. After being encouraged to try on some clothes, the woman felt great and thanked the speaker for making her feel good about herself.
What was the turning point for the speaker's business?
-The turning point was when the speaker felt depressed and defeated because everything she had worked hard for was falling to pieces. This led her to reinvent the store and her way of thinking.
How did the speaker adapt her business to the changing circumstances?
-The speaker adapted her business by going online, creating a website, and using social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram for personal and virtual shopping experiences.
What was the speaker's initial feeling about doing live videos in front of a live audience?
-The speaker admitted that doing live videos was hard, but she felt good about it once she started doing it.
What message does the speaker want the audience to take away from her talk?
-The speaker wants the audience to understand that struggles and obstacles can make us tired, but they also offer opportunities to become stronger and better, as long as we stay committed and positive.
What is the importance of the phrase 'I can, I will' in the speaker's message?
-The phrase 'I can, I will' signifies the speaker's determination and positive attitude, emphasizing the power of self-belief and commitment in overcoming challenges.
How does the speaker use her personal experiences to connect with the audience?
-The speaker shares personal anecdotes, such as her tendency to talk to herself and her experiences with customers, to create a relatable narrative and to illustrate the importance of positivity and self-care.

Outlines

00:00

🗣️ Self-Talk and Positivity

The speaker begins by greeting the audience and emphasizing the importance of self-talk. They encourage the audience to reflect on their internal dialogue, asking what the first words they spoke to themselves were that morning. The speaker shares their own frequent self-talk, including a humorous anecdote about tripping on stage, to illustrate the power of words. They discuss the tendency to use negative language and the need to transform these negative phrases into positive affirmations. The speaker also talks about their women's clothing and gift shop, which was designed to be a judgment-free space that promotes confidence and self-love, with signs that carry empowering messages.

05:01

👚 Personal Shopping and Reinvention

The speaker recounts a heartwarming story about helping a grandmother find clothes that made her feel great in their store. This experience highlights the store's mission to make customers feel good about themselves. However, the speaker then shares a difficult time when the business faced challenges and needed to reinvent itself. They describe the process of shifting to an online presence and embracing social media for personal shopping and virtual shopping experiences. The speaker emphasizes the importance of changing one's mindset and maintaining a positive and determined attitude, which was crucial for the survival and success of their business.

10:04

💪 Overcoming Obstacles with Positivity

In the final paragraph, the speaker invites the audience to reflect on the words they said to themselves that morning, suggesting that these words can reveal changes in their mindset and struggles. They acknowledge the exhaustion that comes from facing obstacles and unthinkable situations but assert that these challenges are opportunities for growth. The speaker concludes by reinforcing the message of resilience and the importance of staying committed and positive, ending on a note of encouragement and gratitude.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Self-talk

Self-talk refers to the internal dialogue one has with oneself. In the video, the speaker emphasizes the importance of being aware of this dialogue and turning negative self-talk into positive affirmations. It is related to the video's theme of personal empowerment and self-care, as exemplified by the speaker's morning affirmation of 'breathe' and the transformation of negative phrases into positive ones.

💡Negative phrases

Negative phrases are expressions that convey a pessimistic or self-deprecating message. The video discusses how commonly people use such phrases and the impact they can have on one's self-esteem. The speaker shares personal anecdotes and encourages the audience to transform these negative phrases into positive ones as part of self-improvement.

💡Personal shopping

Personal shopping is a service where a shopper assists customers in selecting clothing and accessories based on their preferences and needs. The video's speaker owns a women's clothing store and gift shop that offers a personal shopping experience, aiming to create a comfortable, judgment-free environment for customers. This concept is central to the video's message of making people feel confident and valued.

💡Self-care

Self-care involves activities and practices that individuals engage in to maintain their mental, emotional, and physical well-being. The video mentions self-care in the context of wanting to feel inspired and to laugh, highlighting its importance for overall happiness and health. The speaker's store's signs and messages are designed to promote self-care among its customers.

💡Body positivity

Body positivity is a social movement that encourages individuals to have a positive body image and to accept and appreciate their bodies, regardless of societal standards. The video script includes signs in the store that promote body positivity, such as 'be the best version of you' and 'beauty does come in all shapes and sizes,' which align with the video's theme of self-acceptance and empowerment.

💡Reinvention

Reinvention refers to the process of making significant changes to one's lifestyle, mindset, or business approach. The speaker had to reinvent her store and her way of thinking when faced with challenges, which involved creating an online presence and adapting to new shopping trends. This concept is integral to the video's narrative of overcoming adversity and finding new opportunities for growth.

💡Online business

An online business is a commercial enterprise that operates primarily on the internet, selling products or services digitally. The video's speaker had to transition her brick-and-mortar store to an online business model to survive during challenging times. This shift is a key part of the story, illustrating the importance of adaptability and innovation in the face of change.

💡Social media

Social media are digital platforms that allow users to create and share content or participate in social networking. In the video, the speaker leverages social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram for marketing and personal shopping services, which is a crucial strategy for her business's survival and growth during a period when physical stores were less accessible.

💡Determination

Determination is the quality of being resolute and committed to achieving a goal. The video emphasizes the importance of determination in overcoming obstacles, as evidenced by the speaker's decision to create a website and engage in live videos despite initial unfamiliarity with these tasks. Determination is portrayed as a key factor in the speaker's ability to reinvent her business and personal approach to challenges.

💡Productivity

Productivity refers to the efficiency of an individual or system in converting inputs into outputs or the effectiveness of one's efforts to achieve goals. The speaker in the video had to become more productive, focusing on daily tasks and goals to keep her business afloat during difficult times. This keyword is tied to the video's theme of perseverance and the need for continuous effort to achieve success.

💡Opportunity

Opportunity is a chance or situation in which something can be done or an aim can be achieved. The video's speaker views the struggles and obstacles she faced as opportunities for growth and strength. This perspective is central to the video's message of resilience and the potential for positive change that can arise from challenging circumstances.

Highlights

The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-talk and how it can affect one's day.

The speaker shares personal anecdotes about tripping on stage and knocking things over, illustrating the impact of self-talk on actions.

Negative self-talk is a common issue that the speaker discusses, encouraging the audience to turn negative phrases into positive ones.

The speaker owns a women's clothing store and gift shop with a vision of creating a comfortable, non-judgmental space for customers.

The store offers a personal shopping experience to make customers feel confident and comfortable.

Signs with positive messages are placed around the store to inspire and uplift customers.

A story is shared about helping an elderly customer feel beautiful and confident in a new outfit.

The customer's transformation from feeling self-conscious to feeling like a million bucks highlights the store's mission.

The speaker faced a period of depression and defeat, feeling numb and disconnected from the store's success.

In response to the challenges, the store was recreated, and the speaker had to change their thinking and reinvent themselves.

The speaker had to learn how to create a website and go online to adapt to the changing retail landscape.

Focus, determination, and productivity were key to the store's survival and the speaker's personal growth.

The store successfully transitioned to online sales and social media marketing, including personal and virtual shopping experiences.

The speaker had to overcome the fear of doing live videos in front of an audience to promote the business.

The speaker encourages the audience to reflect on their morning self-talk and recognize the power of positive thinking.

The speaker concludes by emphasizing the importance of staying committed and positive in the face of struggles and obstacles.