The public speaking lesson you never had | DK . | TEDxNelson

Summary

The speaker, a seasoned public speaker and TEDx organizer, shares invaluable insights on effective public speaking. Despite his hearing impairment and speech therapy background, he has honed his skills to inspire action through storytelling. He emphasizes the importance of 'grace,' which involves one's physicality and presence on stage, 'credibility,' which is achieved through compelling storytelling, and 'resonance,' the emotional impact on the audience. The speaker also discusses common public speaking pitfalls, such as the misuse of scripts and bullet points, and offers practical advice like the 'soft rock star pose' to combat stage nerves. He concludes with a 'Jedi mind trick,' encouraging speakers to reframe nervousness as excitement, thereby transforming the physiological response to public speaking.

Takeaways

• 🎤 **Embrace Vulnerability**: Sharing personal stories can create a deep connection with the audience, as demonstrated by the speaker's experience at The Sandbox Summit.
• 🎶 **Transform Weaknesses into Strengths**: The speaker turned a hearing impairment and speech difficulties into a powerful speaking skill through perseverance and practice.
• 🤸 **Master the Art of Listening**: Listening is as important as speaking in public presentations, and it can be transformed into a strength that enhances one's communication.
• 👀 **Eliminate Distractions**: Be aware of physical habits like excessive walking or swiveling, which can distract the audience from the message.
• 🚫 **Avoid Script Dependency**: Relying on scripts can lead to nervousness and a lack of authenticity in delivery; instead, prepare by understanding the feelings and responses you want to convey.
• 📝 **Focus on Storytelling**: Crafting a compelling narrative is more impactful than simply presenting information; use personal experiences and emotions to engage the audience.
• 📉 **Breathe and Relax**: Utilize breathing techniques to calm nerves and harness the excitement of public speaking, which can help in delivering a more confident performance.
• 🤝 **Establish Credibility**: The content of the speech should be well-researched and delivered with confidence to establish the speaker's credibility.
• 🎭 **Use Body Language Effectively**: Non-verbal cues such as facial expressions and gestures play a significant role in conveying emotions and maintaining audience engagement.
• 📈 **Structure Your Speech**: Follow a clear structure like the 'tell them what you're going to tell them' model for a coherent and memorable presentation.
• 🚫 **Limit Bullet Points**: Overuse of bullet points can distract and disengage the audience; instead, integrate complex information naturally within the narrative.

Q & A

What is the main challenge the speaker suggests one might face when asked to speak in front of a hundred strangers?

The main challenge is the fear and discomfort of sharing personal and professional stories with an unfamiliar audience, which might make someone want to avoid such a situation.

What has the speaker been doing for the past 10 years that involves public speaking?

The speaker has been running TEDx Wellington, an event in New Zealand's capital city where people are asked to stand and share their stories.

What is the speaker's background related to speech and hearing?

The speaker was born with a hearing impairment and underwent speech therapy during formative years. They also had multiple surgeries related to their ears, which left them with a hearing deficiency.

What is the 'soft rock star pose' the speaker suggests for public speaking?

The 'soft rock star pose' is a strong and firm standing position that prevents the speaker from engaging in nervous habits like hip-bopping or one-legged walking while speaking.

What are the three key components the speaker believes are necessary to deliver a great talk?

The three key components are Grace (the manner of speaking), Credibility (the content and how it's delivered), and Resonance (the emotional impact on the audience).

Why does the speaker advise against using a script during public speaking?

Using a script can lead to nervousness being more visible, as the paper may shake, and it can also disconnect the speaker from the audience, making the speech feel less natural and engaging.

What is the 'Jedi mind trick' the speaker refers to in relation to public speaking?

The 'Jedi mind trick' is a technique where the speaker reframes their nervousness as excitement, which can help to calm their parasympathetic system and make the experience of public speaking more enjoyable.

What does the speaker mean by 'humanizing information' in the context of storytelling during a presentation?

Humanizing information means incorporating personal stories, experiences, or emotions into the presentation to make it more relatable and engaging for the audience.

Why is it important to avoid bullet points when delivering a complex story?

Bullet points can distract the audience and kill attention as people tend to read them rather than listen to the speaker. It's better to segmentize complex information and present it in a way that complements the spoken narrative.

What is the significance of the speaker's personal story about their hearing impairment in the context of the presentation?

The personal story serves as an example of vulnerability and authenticity, which can resonate with the audience and make the speaker more relatable. It also demonstrates how personal challenges can be turned into strengths.

What is the role of the speaker's physicality in enhancing the resonance of their talk?

The speaker's physicality, including facial expressions and body language, provides emotional cues to the audience, helping them understand how they should feel at different points in the presentation.

Outlines

00:00

🎙️ Overcoming Fear in Public Speaking

The speaker begins by posing a daunting scenario of public speaking to an unknown audience and sharing personal stories. He admits his own challenges with public speaking despite his experience as a TEDx organizer and coach. Born with a hearing impairment, he had to undergo speech therapy and numerous surgeries, which paradoxically helped him develop strong listening skills that he applies to his public speaking. The speaker highlights the importance of vulnerability in connecting with an audience, as demonstrated by his memorable keynote at the Sandbox Summit, where he managed to get 300 people to dance with him. He outlines three key components for delivering a great talk: Grace, Credibility, and Resonance.

05:02

🌟 The Art of Public Speaking: Grace

The speaker delves into the first component of effective public speaking, Grace, which he defines as the manner of speaking rather than the content. He emphasizes the importance of physical presence and movement, advising against excessive walking or odd movements on stage. The speaker humorously demonstrates common bad habits like the 'hip bop' and 'one-legged walk-in', suggesting the 'soft rock star pose' as a solution. He also addresses issues like swiveling, excessive gesticulation, and nervous shaking, recommending practical solutions like holding an object or using a clicker to manage these habits. The speaker strongly advises against using a script, as it can amplify nerves and lead to a disconnect with the audience.

10:02

📝 Crafting Credible and Compelling Stories

Moving on to the second component, Credibility, the speaker discusses the importance of the content of the speech and how it is delivered. He criticizes the overuse of complex jargon and bullet points, advocating for simplicity and the humanization of information. The speaker suggests using a structured narrative form, such as the classic 'tell them what you're going to tell them' model, to craft stories that resonate with the audience. He also stresses the importance of brevity, using Woodrow Wilson's quote to highlight the value of concise communication. The speaker advises against reading from slides and recommends segmenting complex information to keep the audience engaged and following the narrative.

15:03

🎭 Emotional Resonance and the Jedi Mind Trick

The final component, Resonance, is about the emotional impact of the speech on the audience. The speaker explains the importance of evoking emotions and avoiding a neutral, informational tone. He suggests using personal stories and emotional cues to guide the audience's feelings. The speaker also shares a technique to manage nerves, involving deep, controlled breathing, which can help calm the speaker and reframe nervousness as excitement. By understanding that nervousness and excitement are physiologically similar, the speaker encourages embracing the excitement and using it to enhance the presentation. The speaker concludes with a recap of the three components and a reminder to enjoy the process of public speaking.

Keywords

💡Public Speaking

Public speaking refers to the act of addressing an audience in a formal setting. It is a crucial skill for effective communication and persuasion. In the video, the speaker shares his experiences and tips on how to excel at public speaking, emphasizing the importance of overcoming fear and connecting with the audience.

💡TEDx Wellington

TEDx Wellington is a local TEDx event held in Wellington, the capital city of New Zealand. The speaker has been organizing TEDx Wellington for ten years, which involves inviting people to share their stories and ideas on stage. This event is an example of a platform where public speaking is central to the exchange of innovative and inspiring ideas.

💡Leadership Coaching

Leadership coaching involves guiding and training leaders to enhance their skills, particularly in areas such as communication and decision-making. The speaker mentions coaching leaders, including ex-All Blacks and CEOs, which indicates the application of public speaking skills in professional development and leadership.

💡Hearing Impairment

A hearing impairment is a partial or total loss of hearing ability. The speaker was born with a hearing impairment and had to undergo speech therapy, which influenced his journey to become an effective public speaker. This personal story illustrates the concept of overcoming personal challenges to achieve success in communication.

💡Speech Therapy

Speech therapy is a treatment that helps individuals with speech and language disorders to improve their communication skills. The speaker's experience with speech therapy was instrumental in developing his public speaking abilities, showcasing how such therapy can play a significant role in personal growth and skill development.

💡Grace

In the context of public speaking, grace refers to the manner in which a speaker delivers their message, including their physical presence and the way they carry themselves on stage. The speaker discusses the importance of having grace, such as avoiding excessive movement and adopting a 'soft rock star pose' to appear confident and in control.

💡Credibility

Credibility in public speaking is the perception of the speaker as being trustworthy and competent. It is established through the content of the speech, the speaker's expertise, and their ability to communicate complex ideas in a relatable manner. The speaker emphasizes the importance of credibility by discussing how to craft stories that resonate with the audience.

💡Resonance

Resonance in public speaking is the emotional impact a speech has on the audience. It is about leaving the audience with a certain feeling or emotion. The speaker talks about the importance of evoking emotions and how the speaker's own emotions and physicality can influence the audience's emotional response.

💡Storytelling

Storytelling is the art of telling a story to engage an audience and convey a message or lesson. The speaker highlights the power of personal stories and using a simple structure like 'tell them what you're going to tell them' as a model for effective storytelling in public speaking.

💡Bullet Points

Bullet points are concise summaries or headings used to outline the main points of a speech or presentation. The speaker advises against relying on bullet points during a speech, as they can distract the audience and diminish the speaker's ability to maintain attention. Instead, complex information should be broken down and delivered in a way that complements the speaker's narrative.

💡Emotional Cues

Emotional cues are the facial expressions, body language, and tone of voice that convey an individual's emotions. The speaker discusses how important it is for the speaker to provide emotional cues to guide the audience's emotional journey through the speech, emphasizing the connection between the speaker's emotions and the audience's engagement.

💡Jedi Mind Trick

The 'Jedi Mind Trick' mentioned by the speaker is a metaphor for a mental technique to help manage nervousness by reframing it as excitement. This concept is used to illustrate the power of mindset and perception in overcoming the fear associated with public speaking.

Highlights

The speaker has been running TEDx Wellington for 10 years and has extensive experience in public speaking and coaching leaders.

Despite having a hearing impairment and undergoing surgeries, the speaker turned listening into a powerful public speaking skill.

The speaker emphasizes the importance of sharing personal and professional stories to inspire creative action.

Three key elements for delivering a great talk are identified: Grace, credibility, and resonance.

Grace involves how you say something, not just what you say, and includes physicality and movement control.

Credibility is about the stories you choose to tell and how you tell them, which should be simple and relatable.

Resonance is about the audience's emotional response to your talk and the importance of humanizing information.

The speaker shares a personal story of getting 300 people to dance with him as an example of the power of public speaking.

The 'soft rock star pose' is introduced as a technique to prevent excessive movement on stage.

Shaking while holding a script can amplify nervousness; instead, speakers should practice without a script.

Bullet points can kill attention; complex information should be broken up and delivered alongside speech.

The speaker discusses the importance of emotional cues in presentations and how they affect audience engagement.

A Jedi mind trick is introduced to help speakers reframe nervousness as excitement, which can improve their performance.

The speaker provides a simple presentation model: tell the audience what you're going to tell them, tell them, then tell them what you told them.

The use of lived experience stories is encouraged for better audience connection rather than relying on read material.

The speaker shares a personal experience of coaching a government official on the importance of smiling and showing emotion during presentations.

The talk concludes with a reminder that public speaking can be an enjoyable experience when armed with the right techniques and mindset.

Transcripts

foreign

[Music]

how would you feel if I invited you to

stand in front of a hundred people that

you don't know

and try to share personal and

professional stories to create and

ignite and Inspire creative action

is that a proposal that you would run

towards that's something you go yes

that's full of promise for me and

potential or would you like to push me

over and Run to the Hills

probably the latter a lot of you were

thinking great public speaking I kind of

do a little bit of that but it's not my

favorite thing ever to do for the last

10 years I've been running the tedx

Wellington down obviously in the capital

city of New Zealand and asking people to

do just that the stand and share their

story stand in their voice but for the

last six years I've been coaching

leaders and ex all blacks and kind of

CEOs of big companies and a Dame thrown

into the mix to do that as well however

I've got about 60 news of public

speaking experience myself I've been

really lucky to speak to small audiences

as well as larger audiences on five

continents around the globe on different

topics and I spend my time really trying

to help people find and have their voice

and today with total humility I gotta

say I'm gonna give you the public

speaking lesson that you should have got

when you were a kid or at least when you

started work let's be honest cool so

this is me

born in The Valleys of Camry South Wales

ah look at that not a lot of people can

put off the stripy sock flouncy shirt

with a short and kind of vest top like

that it was the 70s so forgive me for

that man you Jillian so there I am

beautiful little kid runt of the letter

I got two older brothers they remind me

I'm the runt so that's kind of cool

I was born with a hearing impairment

that was very quickly picked up and then

through my formative years I had to have

a lot of speech therapy if you know

anybody with a speech impediment uh

issues need to do with their sharing but

sometimes not but as a kid I couldn't

cheer the sounds to then save the sounds

so I remember from time I was about five

time I was about eight or nine every

week going with my mom to the speech

therapist office and I had a couple of

doctors there who teach me to listen and

then in listening pronounce the words

back or at least certain consonants and

and groups of consonants as well by the

time in my teens I was in and out of

hospital with evasive surgeries to do

with my children perforated eardrums

that's always fun skin grafts

mastoidectomies that's a big word for

cutting little bones out in the middle

ear so you lose a lot of the kind of

functionality in your ear and polyps

removing from eustachian tubes very big

words for okay he's had a lot of stuff

done with his ears so I'm left with a

deficiency however fast forward I'm now

speaking to you about speaking which is

kind of ironic but cool right how we

turn these superheroes or always have uh

as many kind of flaws as they do

superhero skills as well so I've turned

listening into my speaking skill in

terms of what I get to to in a little

bit how speaking can really be more

about listen listening than it is about

talking

so in my history of speaking this is my

favorite ever speaking gig you'll see me

hopefully looking cool and calm and

Collective speaking at a conference

called The Sandbox Summit it was in

Boston at MIT if you know that that's a

big cool big deal it was the closing

keynote always go on last or towards the

last people remember you much more then

so that's cool and that was the first

time I really stepped into my

vulnerability as the speaker back in

2015 I was speaking a lot but I really

stepped into the idea of revealing who I

am talked about me hearing the

difficulties but my my creative insights

and things like that and the impact of

that is that I got 300 people to dance

with me seriously this is me dancing

with 300 people and just to prove it I

come up in a minute spot the bad white

boy dancing right there

see cool

and I suddenly don't know me that if you

get the right components together you

can move physically people into dancing

with you so what are those components

well with a big Jedi mind trick and

three other elements I'm gonna now give

them to you you only need three things

to Great deliver a great talk and they

are Grace credibility and resonance

let's go through them very very quickly

Grace it's not what you're saying it's

how you were saying it

credibility that's the stuff coming out

your mouth now that's the stories you

choose to tell and the way in which you

choose to tell them cool story models

Frameworks blah blah blah resonance

that's the audience's role in your talk

what are you leaving them feeling right

the great Maya Angelou paraphrasing her

here said that obviously people will

remind me how you made them feel a lot

longer than what you told them or what

you did

so let's take them one by one chapter by

chapter if you like and now I'm gonna

show you stuff that you can't unsee and

I apologize for that kind of because

once I reveal things to you you're gonna

go see other people speaking and going

ah DK told me about that that's cool so

let's start with my favorite thing to

work on with clients which is Grace

remember that's not what to say what

they're saying that's how they are

saying it their whole physicality my

favorite thing with clients is to stop

them walking too much stop them moving

in a weird wonderful way so I'm going to

show you all the weird and wonderful

ways in which people tell me other

things about themselves first let's

start with your feet okay I'm quite

solid up here I don't mind walking and

coming forward and now and again and

then stepping back gently when I feel

like I've made my point and situating

myself here some people do a couple of

different things one called a hip Bop

and the other is called one-legged

walk-in again I'm sorry I'm gonna show

you this stuff you can't and see it but

the hip-hop is obviously they sit on the

hip then they transfer their weight onto

the other hip now some people every

sentence is this and in another sentence

comes off and another sentence and if it

was a beat going on in the back you've

got a hip bot movement right they're

just dancing up here great

my one-legged walk-in is kind of fun

because you'll see this a lot is people

stand and for some reason when we know

why this wants to leave thank you very

much it just wants to leave obviously

their body is going run there's 100

eyeballs on you your food or you're in

trouble with the tribe that's your

lizard brain but for some reason this

leg wants to leave but you know you got

to Stand and Deliver

so that's a big issue right because if

then we have some people wandering

around and feeling a little bit off they

kind of throw their focus down here so

those two issues can be solved with one

solution I call it the soft rock star

pose I made this up all right we know

Rockstar poses this you know you got an

ax a guitar and you're rocking out to

something hard cool that's rock star

pose cool soft rock star poses when you

get up to speak don't speak until you're

standing

strong and firm this is not standing

like that where I can one-legged walk or

I can hip-hop okay this is strong and

firm now the haptic feedback if I try to

move I can't do the hip thing because

the way I'm built but if I can do the

one-legged walking I can't because I'm

all over the place

stand first before you speak just your

feet let's move on up some people are

swivelers I like swivelers you're

swiveling you don't realize you're

swiveling but bless them is swiveling

that's cool and they don't realize it

and that's the one big thing you gotta

do as friends and colleagues is tell

people if they don't know what they're

doing please when they're not there

because they don't realize they're doing

that so let's move a little bit higher

up to the hands and he gesticulate those

in the crowd I'm one of those thank you

very much I don't mind stressing things

like that and openstandial making things

small when I need to hands are good for

reasons however some people have a

gestural cue and every point they make

or every sentence or every International

point they make is joined with a hand

gestural cue you might know some of

these people and you just think why are

they doing that every point they make

and they don't know that they're doing

that again or maybe they're shaking yeah

we all get the shakes and the nerves

well if they're shaking give their hands

something to do like holding a clicker

and hold it by the side or put a hanky

in their hand of stick it in their

pocket where the tedxb goes really shook

like that that's what we did put our

hand in a pocket with a hanky so she

could squeeze and then she looked calm

up there but if you looked at her

forearms you were popping okay that's

where that's where the strength lies oh

scary stuff

now I mentioned shaken now shaking is

really interesting when it comes to

hands because a lot of people will just

started well surely you need a script to

start to speak now I'm going to come

back to scripts in a minute the reason

why you should never use a script

there's a couple of reasons I'm going to

illustrate it with this lovely

strategically placed piece of paper

thank you very much A lot of people use

scripts when they publicly speak in and

we are professionals now so we don't use

scripts right you joining me in that

kind of yeah change the world no more

scraps evil scraps because when I see

people with a script what I usually see

is people shaking with a script not just

with a script and especially if it's a

piece of paper and you're standing

trying to present now the paper will

rock for you yeah you've all seen this

happening and what happens then is that

as the speaker I'm looking down and

seeing this paper shaking so now I'm

aware that I'm scared and you can see

that I'm scared now it's amplifying now

I try to do some funky stuff like hold

it with my hip or something and try to

fold it over and hold it down there and

just bring it up now and again and it's

a whole bag of worms right there right

so let's what happens when you get rid

of the script right people go if

you don't have a script how can I

practice my talk

just didn't go anywhere you can't

practice public speaking

they're out loud you can only prepare

for how you're going to feel when you

stand on the stage with 100 people that

you don't know and you're trying to

impress them

because most people practice wrong they

write the script and by the way we write

differently than we read just straight

away there's a deficit in communication

there is reasons why there are speech

writers and scriptwriters out there it's

a really hard to write dialogue we speak

differently than we write so now if you

start with a script what you then do is

condense it down bullet points and those

bullet points become what you say and

the stories you tell which I'll get on

to in a minute but practicing right

which means not practicing with a script

means then you're not at home practicing

with your cat your dog your kids or your

spouse who goes that's brilliant darling

you're going to do great and then when

you get up you don't do great because

suddenly there's lights I can hear

myself back now this matters now there

are people I don't know looking at me

if the conditions change

so you have to prepare differently you

have to prepare for your physiological

responses which I'll get to at the end

because that's the elephant in the room

room in the Jedi mind trick I'm going to

play on you

but that was Grace let's move on to

credibility the second chapter of our

little thing here so credibility is

interesting because the stuff coming out

of your mouth no no this is where Ted

has got a lot to blame for I seriously I

point the tear into a bad Teddy you know

bad head because Ted as we all know is

this big beer moth of this is brilliant

presenting

I would say this has had a negative

effect on the expectations of the

audience because this raised your

literacy so now anybody standing here

has to match what you've seen in the

past and you've probably seen good

presenters right to your level of

literacy is ranged even in as raised

sorry even in work now when you see in

people present you want this level of

expertise and delivery right as a

speaker that means I got up my game as a

creative producer who books other

speakers I'm now finding people who hold

themselves very well can communicate

complex problems in a simple way but

give of themselves as well

usually that's not the CEO who gets

handed their script and presentation

when they turn up because they're far

too busy to do it themselves right

so let's think about well how do you

craft a great story

I'm going to take a quote from this Old

Gentleman Woodrow Wilson one of the

okayish presidents in the past and he

said this

[Music]

brevity is tough to do

and we've all been in a situations where

the boss says yeah I'll just speak for

two minutes and 10 minutes later you're

thinking have you got a point it's

always fun for the listener if you do

right get to it in other words so think

about brevity as a skill as a condensed

distillation skill now the art of

anything the craft is always in the

editing so when you write your script

now you've got to condense and

concentrate that down and distill it

down into the stories now there are so

many narrative forms out there it could

be as simple as just tell me where you

started where you finished and fill out

the lovely little bits in between my

favorite model is get up tell me what

you're going to tell me tell me tell me

what you told me

it's the simplest presentation model out

there really simple right there's other

more complex ones the Nancy Duarte the

shape of great presentation check that

out where she establishes what is and

what could be what is what could be you

go back and forth between those twos and

end with a lovely new bless with the

annulment and the three-act structure

you don't have to get that detailed all

you got to do is stand up there and tell

lived experienced stories choose from

lived experience not stuff you've read

that will resonate with the the people

in the room much better what doesn't

resonate is bullet points that's a slide

to remind me to talk about bullet points

see what I've done there yeah it's a

good stuff so there are three bullet

points on this slide they're just not

there because it's pattern seeking

creatures if I started with three bullet

points in other words any text on a

slide you are reading it so what I do is

I hold the slide until I'm ready to talk

about the guns don't kill people

bullets kill people and bullet points

kill attention

boom

cute yes but you know the point that

Megan if I'd started like this you would

have been reading and by the time you

got to the bottom I would have been

reading the first one you would have had

to come back with me and join in because

you can't listen as well as read

you get the point right so if you have

complex information make sure it's

segmentized or broken up and have it

coming in as you're speaking to it so

the listeners can follow the story with

you and not ahead of you or trying to

decipher or are confused and coming back

at the wrong point when they start

listening to you again

the last one

is the resonant now this is where you

have a role I guess it's your emotive

feeling what am I leaving you feeling as

an audience as a group of humans

so this is where most people fall over

because they write a script based on

something that they want to impart with

this information now in a realm of a

sphere or atmosphere this is a line so

let's talk about it as a spectrum thank

you of emotion on the one end you got

feared and disgust on the other hand

you've got joy inhalation the worst

place in given a presentation is in the

middle

that's the information ma realm m-e-h

okay I have no feeling towards that it's

just information right I'm not saying

don't have information I'm saying

humanize that information as much as

possible whether it's you in the story

whether someone else a user and you know

an end experience user of something

throw humans as much as possible into

your story and this is where I come back

full circle about Grace as well because

you will get your emotional cues from me

as the speaker I had a client bless him

quite senior in the government and he

sent me a 40-minute presentation of him

speaking in a European conference about

something very funky apparently and that

was great I could watch the talk and

then critique when I met him for the

first time and it was very ego very open

he was like hit me with everything you

got so I said great my first question is

how many times did you smile in a

40-minute talk

and he was like I don't know and I had

counted and it was twice the first time

was thanking the person for introducing

him the second time was thanking

everybody for listening to him he was

gone right we've seen those people who

are kind of very stoic in their

presentation but what they're saying is

freaking awesome apparently but they

don't change their face they're very

serious about these things and that was

my point to him there was no emotional

kind of cues from you as a presenter of

the information to understand how as The

Listener I should be feeling at certain

points in the story

if you're serious don't do this okay

this is a very serious subject you know

or alternately if you need to get a

little bit fun with it you know you can

play around with this but please

recognize that people are going to

mirror your emotion so when you get

excited and lean and you use your hand

you're going to feel a little bit of oh

he's coming forward I should be paying

attention to you versus someone going

back and obviously a bit scared of you

and then start talking like that and and

don't have it you can get my point the

whole physicality lends itself to the

resonance now this is where we get the

Jedi mind trick and this is the last

piece of information I give you and this

is the fun little thing that you can't

participate in if you breathe with this

expanding and Contracting little visual

you will reset your parasympathetic

system big words for basically you chill

the hell out you might want to yawn

while you do this I do it when I breathe

this slow I yawn that's cool and I stood

on the side of stages with this as a

gift I got it I can send it to you with

people and I go let's do this breathing

exercise and I see their shoulders drop

and they relax and then I give them the

beautiful stuff which is you're not

nervous you're excited

not nervous yet excited and as soon as I

clicks into their brain the

physiological responses actually had

kind of amplify that excitement remember

when you gone to see your favorite ever

person in concert or your favorite ever

team in whatever Sport and they're just

running on you feel that excitement and

you're like oh my God I'm here I want to

pee this is called cool

and that is the same as when you're

feeling really really nervous like I

don't want to be you need to pee

the psychological state is the only

thing that's changed so you're not

nervous you're excited you're not

nervous you're excited it's excited to

speak not nervous and that will get you

through so many of the ills that we have

when it comes to public speaking so just

a recap

if you had a little bit of Grace and

credibility and resonance with a little

bit of a Yoda Jedi mind trick going on

you can then speak with a plum and

connect to an audience and also whilst

you're up here have a little bit of fun

thank you for your time and attention

really appreciate it