When your enemy becomes human | Sadika Kebbi | TEDxUniversityofBalamand

Summary

In this poignant narrative, a speaker recounts their childhood in Lebanon, once a vibrant cultural hub, before the devastating outbreak of the civil war. The tragic loss of their best friend, Jana, leads to a journey of understanding, guided by Uncle George, a compassionate Christian family friend who teaches the importance of serving others beyond religious divides. Through personal anecdotes and reflections on intergenerational lessons, the speaker emphasizes the enduring power of humanity and kindness, illustrating that true identity transcends labels and that love can flourish even amidst conflict.

Takeaways

• 🌍 The speaker reflects on their upbringing in Lebanon, once known as the 'Paris of the Middle East', where cultural diversity thrived among Muslims, Christians, and Jews.
• 👗 The speaker and their best friend, Jana, engaged in playful activities that showcased their youth and innocence before the onset of the civil war.
• 🕊️ The tragic turning point came on December 6, 1975, known as Black Saturday, when the civil war began, leading to violence and loss among friends and families.
• 😢 The speaker experienced profound trauma upon discovering the death of their friend Jana, marking a shift towards anger and hatred.
• 🔄 Two years later, the speaker’s family sought refuge with a Christian friend, Uncle George, showcasing unexpected acts of compassion amid conflict.
• 📖 Uncle George provided support and spiritual guidance, emphasizing the importance of empathy and serving others, regardless of religious differences.
• 🤝 Through experiences with Uncle George, the speaker began to see Christians not as enemies but as integral parts of their identity and Lebanon.
• 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 The speaker found the essence of compassion and service reflected in their own children, recognizing similar values in their actions.
• 🌱 A visit to a 128-year-old woman revealed her courageous acts during wartime, reinforcing the idea that serving others transcends fear and prejudice.
• ❤️ The speaker concludes that within everyone lies a potential for compassion that can bridge divides, urging others to recognize this shared humanity.

Q & A

What event marks the turning point in the narrator's life?

The turning point in the narrator’s life occurs on December 6, 1975, known as Black Saturday, when Christian militias killed hundreds of innocent Muslims. This day is marked by the loss of the narrator's best friend, Jana, which shatters the narrator’s view of the world and ignites hatred.

How does the narrator initially react to the events of Black Saturday?

Initially, the narrator does not cry or show emotional distress. Instead, they push their feelings aside, allowing anger, rage, and hatred to consume them. This emotional detachment represents how the war and violence hardened the narrator’s heart.

What lesson does Uncle George teach the narrator?

Uncle George teaches the narrator that true humanity is revealed through service to others. He emphasizes that when one holds God in their heart, even enemies can be seen as human. This message slowly transforms the narrator’s hardened views on religion, nationality, and enemies.

Why does the narrator's family seek refuge with Uncle George?

After the escalation of the Lebanese Civil War, the narrator’s family flees their home in search of safety. They are taken in by Uncle George, a Christian friend of the narrator’s father, in order to protect themselves from the violence around them.

What is the significance of the Bible in the narrator's experience?

The Bible becomes a symbol of refuge and faith during a time of fear. Uncle George hands the narrator the Bible and tells them to read it, asking them not to look at the door during a dangerous confrontation. This moment becomes a pivotal point in the narrator’s journey toward understanding humanity and compassion.

How does Uncle George’s actions challenge the narrator's preconceived notions?

Uncle George, a Christian, protects the narrator and their family from other Christians who might wish them harm. This act of kindness challenges the narrator’s beliefs, as they had initially been taught to see Christians as enemies. Uncle George’s compassion prompts the narrator to reevaluate their assumptions about religious and ethnic divides.

What role does community service play in the narrator’s transformation?

Community service plays a central role in the narrator’s transformation. By participating in acts of service, like distributing bread, caring for the injured, and burying the dead, the narrator begins to see the humanity in others, irrespective of their background, and gradually sheds the anger and hatred that once consumed them.

What is the significance of the elderly woman’s story in the script?

The elderly woman’s story represents a life of resilience, compassion, and service. She survived two world wars and the Lebanese Civil War, and when asked about her actions during the conflict, she explains that she protected her Christian neighbors. Her wisdom, encapsulated in the phrase 'Never fear God's creation, but fear man's creation,' reinforces the importance of humanity over divisiveness.

How does the narrator’s son embody the values learned from Uncle George?

The narrator’s son, during his time at university, pays the tuition fees for another student, demonstrating the values of service and compassion that Uncle George had imparted. This act of kindness mirrors Uncle George’s teachings and reveals that the lesson of humanity transcends generations.

What message does the script convey about the possibility of overcoming divisions between people?

The script conveys the message that humanity has the potential to transcend religious, national, and ethnic divides. By embracing the values of service, compassion, and understanding, even those once seen as enemies can be recognized as fellow humans. The narrator’s journey of transformation exemplifies the power of empathy in healing societal rifts.