6 lessons I Wish I Had Learned Sooner
Summary
TLDRThis video script emphasizes the importance of learning life lessons early to avoid pitfalls and make informed choices. It shares six key lessons: prioritizing health, controlling your environment to manage habits, staying true to oneself, the necessity of mental rest, managing energy over time for productivity, and focusing on making everyday moments enjoyable for a great life. The speaker encourages viewers to reflect on their own experiences and share lessons they wish they had known sooner.
Takeaways
- šŖ Health is paramount: Never take your health for granted and prioritize it to avoid regret and enjoy life fully.
- š Prioritize self-care: Implement habits like getting enough sleep, exercising, and managing stress to protect and enhance your health.
- š” Control your environment: Shape your surroundings to facilitate self-control and make positive behaviors more accessible.
- š§ Be authentic: Embrace your true self to attract genuine connections and avoid the disconnection that comes with pretending.
- š§āāļø Mental rest is crucial: Recognize the need for mental breaks and avoid overloading your brain with constant information consumption.
- š¶āāļø Opt for effective breaks: Engage in activities that allow your mind to relax, such as walking without electronic devices, for true mental recovery.
- ā³ Manage energy, not time: Align tasks with your natural energy rhythms to enhance productivity and achieve a healthier work-life balance.
- š Consistent good days build a great life: Focus on making everyday moments enjoyable rather than just seeking grand events.
- š Adaptability is key: Be open to learning new lessons and adapting your life rules as you grow and gain new experiences.
- š” Share and reflect: Engage in sharing and reflecting on personal growth lessons to continue learning and improving.
Q & A
What is the first lesson emphasized in the transcript about living a fulfilling life?
-The first lesson is that health is everything, and it should not be taken for granted. It's a reminder to appreciate and prioritize one's health to avoid regret and consequences.
Why is it important to avoid trading health for wealth according to the speaker?
-The speaker argues that health is wealth and that trading it for money is not a good trade-off because health allows us to enjoy life to the fullest, and without it, we become limited.
What practical steps are suggested to maintain and enhance health?
-Practical steps include getting enough sunlight, ensuring adequate sleep, exercising regularly, avoiding unnecessary risks, junk food, soda, alcohol, smoking, and learning to manage stress.
How does controlling one's environment relate to self-control according to the transcript?
-Controlling one's environment can make self-control easier or even unnecessary by setting up the environment in a way that reduces temptations and distractions, making positive behaviors more accessible.
What is an example given in the transcript to illustrate how optimizing one's environment can help with self-control?
-The example given is the speaker not eating sugary foods for months, not because of exceptional discipline, but because they made it difficult to access such foods by not keeping them at home.
Why is it better to stay true to oneself according to the speaker?
-Staying true to oneself is better because it allows finding people who like you for who you are, rather than for a persona you're pretending to be, leading to more authentic and fulfilling relationships.
What is the Solomon Asch experiment mentioned in the transcript, and what does it illustrate?
-The Solomon Asch experiment illustrates the powerful need for social acceptance and the pressure to conform, even at the cost of one's own judgment and authenticity. It showed that participants often conformed to a group's incorrect opinion despite knowing the correct answer.
How does the speaker suggest giving the mind a proper rest?
-The speaker suggests taking a break from mental activities by engaging in simple activities like a 30-minute walk without electronic devices, which allows thoughts to run free and recharges mental batteries.
What is the significance of managing energy over time according to the transcript?
-Managing energy over time is significant because it aligns tasks with natural energy rhythms, leading to increased productivity and quality of work. It also promotes a healthier work-life balance by reducing work hours and allowing more time for rest and personal pursuits.
How does the speaker define a great life, and what is the key to achieving it?
-The speaker defines a great life as having good days consistently, emphasizing that life is a string of days. The key to achieving it is to improve the average day, focusing on everyday moments and finding contentment in the routine and mundane.
What is the speaker's perspective on the balance between work and enjoyment in life?
-The speaker believes in finding a balance where the average day is enjoyable rather than enduring long periods of misery for the sake of occasional enjoyment. They encourage structuring one's day in a way that brings personal satisfaction and contentment.
Outlines
šŖ Prioritizing Health for a Fulfilling Life
The speaker emphasizes the paramount importance of health, which is often overlooked, especially by younger adults. They share personal experiences, such as catching a cold annually, to illustrate the value of good health and the consequences of neglect. The speaker counters the common pursuit of wealth at the expense of health with a rhetorical question, urging the audience to consider the impracticality of wealth without health. They advocate for a lifestyle that enhances health, including sunlight exposure, adequate sleep, regular exercise, risk avoidance, and stress management, warning of the regret that comes from poor health choices.
š Controlling Your Environment to Control Your Life
The speaker discusses the concept of self-control and argues that discipline, while important, is often overrated. They share their personal strategy of environmental optimization to reduce the need for self-control. By making unhealthy choices inconvenient and healthy choices easy, they have successfully avoided temptations like sugary foods. The speaker suggests that by structuring one's environment to support positive behaviors, such as having a water bottle always in sight to encourage hydration, one can more effectively manage habits and, consequently, the trajectory of one's life.
š Staying True to Yourself for Authentic Relationships
The speaker reflects on the realization that adapting to social circles by pretending to be someone else is not a sustainable way to gain social acceptance. They argue that authenticity is key to finding people who appreciate you for who you truly are. Drawing from the Solomon Asch experiments, which demonstrated the strong influence of group conformity, the speaker encourages the audience to resist the pressure to conform and to embrace their individuality. They suggest that being true to oneself is essential for forming meaningful connections and avoiding the alienation that comes from inauthentic relationships.
š§ The Importance of Mental Rest for Cognitive Health
The speaker highlights the need for mental rest, paralleling it with the well-recognized need for physical rest. They point out that cognitive work, such as programming, can be as draining as physical labor, yet mental fatigue is often overlooked. The speaker dispels the myth that passive activities like watching TV provide a true mental break, instead advocating for activities that allow the mind to relax without the influx of new information, such as walking without electronic devices. They stress the importance of giving the mind regular breaks to maintain mental health and productivity, suggesting that this approach leads to better work quality and a more sustainable lifestyle.
ā° Managing Energy, Not Time, for Enhanced Productivity
The speaker introduces an alternative approach to productivity that focuses on aligning tasks with one's natural energy rhythms rather than strictly managing time. They share their personal experience of scheduling demanding tasks during peak energy times, which has significantly improved their work quality and efficiency. This strategy has allowed the speaker to reduce work hours while maintaining productivity and has encouraged a healthier work-life balance. The speaker suggests that recognizing and working with one's energy patterns can lead to a more effective and satisfying work experience, even for those in manual labor.
š Consistently Good Days Lead to a Great Life
The speaker concludes by discussing the concept of a great life, suggesting that it is not built on occasional grand events but on the consistent quality of everyday moments. They argue that life is a series of days, and making average days good is the key to a great life. The speaker shares their own transformation from chasing success at the cost of daily happiness to finding contentment in their routine. They encourage the audience to focus on improving their everyday experiences, as this is what truly constitutes a fulfilling life.
Mindmap
Keywords
š”Health
š”Self-control
š”Environment
š”Authenticity
š”Social Acceptance
š”Mental Rest
š”Productivity
š”Energy Management
š”Great Life
š”Contentment
š”Pitfalls
Highlights
Health is the most important aspect of life and should not be taken for granted.
The consequences of neglecting health often become apparent only when something bad happens.
An old adage emphasizes that health is wealth, yet people often prioritize money over health.
Avoiding unhealthy habits like junk food, soda, alcohol, smoking, and vaping is crucial for maintaining health.
Managing stress and getting enough sleep, sunlight, and exercise are essential for health.
Controlling your environment can lead to better self-control and habit formation.
Discipline can be overrated; making self-control easy through environmental setup is more effective.
By making unhealthy options less accessible, one can reduce the need for willpower.
Staying true to oneself is more important than fitting into social expectations.
Being authentic attracts people who appreciate you for who you are, not for a persona.
Solomon Asch's experiments showed the powerful need for social acceptance and its impact on individual judgment.
The mind needs rest just as much as the body does, and mental exertion can be draining.
Mental breaks should not involve passive consumption of information but rather activities that allow the mind to relax.
Managing energy, not just time, can lead to increased productivity and a healthier work-life balance.
Aligning tasks with natural energy rhythms can improve the quality and efficiency of work.
Consistently having good days is the key to living a great life, rather than relying on occasional grand events.
It's important to find contentment in everyday moments to build a truly great life.
Transcripts
Over the course of our lives, we all learn someĀ lessons that we wish we had learned sooner.
These lessons often come fromĀ a combination of experience,
reflection, and the advice others give us.
They shape who we are, guide our decisions,
and provide a framework for living aĀ more fulfilling and meaningful life.
Thatās why the sooner we learnĀ or at least become aware of them,
the better it is for us, as they can help us avoidĀ common pitfalls and make more informed choices.
Iām going to share some of the lessons IāveĀ learned with you today, in no particular order.
But theyāre not just lessons, ratherĀ theyāre more like rules I live by,
because as long as I stick to them, IāmĀ able to enjoy my life to the fullest.
Now, without further ado, we have number one:
Health is everything.
Yet, most of us take it for granted.
This is especially prevalent amongĀ younger adults in their early 20s,
who often forget that actions have consequences.
When weāre going about our day-to-day lives and
everything is fine, we donāt appreciateĀ how healthy we are. Why would we?
Itās only when something bad happens thatĀ we realize just how lucky we really were.
Iām no different in this regard.
Usually, once a year, Iāll catch the common cold and be out of commission for a few days.
Itās always an unpleasant experience,
but itās also a stark reminderĀ not to take health for granted.
Thereās an old adage: health is wealth.
However, people often neglect their health in pursuit of money.
Which I donāt think is a good trade-off.
Consider this: would you trade yourĀ life with someone whoās worth 100 million dollars,
but theyāre so illĀ that they canāt even leave their bed?
I know I wouldnāt.
Most people would be willing toĀ spend all of that money just to be healthy again.
Because health is actually what allowsĀ us to enjoy life to the fullest.
Without it, we become limited. And unfortunately, we often
come to this conclusion too late, or onlyĀ realize it when something bad happens to us.
Thatās why I believe itās important to makeĀ decisions that protect and enhance your health.
Get enough sunlight. Ensure you get enough sleep.
Exercise regularly.
Stop taking unnecessary risks thatĀ could lead to permanent injury.
Avoid junk food. Avoid soda and alcohol.
Donāt smoke or vape. Learn to manage stress.
These are just a few of the steps you can take.
Appreciate and prioritize your health,Ā or suffer the consequences and regret.
Number two: If you can control yourĀ environment, you can control your life.
When we think about self-control, weĀ might think of someone with an iron will
who can force himself to act againstĀ his instincts through sheer discipline.
While this is one way to think about self-control,Ā Iāve learned that discipline is often overrated.
Constantly powering through distractionsĀ and resisting temptations requires
a lot of energy and brainpower. Instead, setting up your environment
in a way that makes self-control easy orĀ even unnecessary is a much better approach.
For example, I havenāt eatenĀ any sugary foods in months.
But itās not because I dislike sugar or haveĀ exceptional discipline. Quite the opposite.
If you put an ice cream in front of me,
Iāll eat all of it in seconds. My self-control is that weak.
However, Iāve optimized my environment in such aĀ way that I donāt have to resist ice cream at all.
Occasionally Iāll get a cravingĀ for it, especially during summer.
But if I donāt have any atĀ home when the craving hits,
it becomes a chore to get some, sinceĀ Iād have to go all the way to the store.
And by the time I get there, eitherĀ my rational brain takes over,
or the craving subsides on its own. Essentially, by making it difficult
to get my hands on ice cream, I barelyĀ have to use any brainpower resisting it.
Now when it comes to any positiveĀ behavior I want to practice more often,
I make it as convenient as possible. Whether itāsĀ reading, exercising, working, or eating healthily,
I ensure these activities are easy toĀ engage in by making them readily available.
If I wanted to incorporate a new habit, letāsĀ say drinking more water, Iād just make it
incredibly convenient for myself to do so. Iād always have a water bottle within armās
reach or somewhere visible as a reminder. Iād practically be tripping over it,
but that easy access would ensure thatĀ staying hydrated remained effortless.
And yes, this approach of optimizing yourĀ environment works exceptionally well.
Because by creating obstacles forĀ things you shouldnāt do and making
things you should do more convenient, youĀ can manage your habits more effectively.
And if you can control your habits, youĀ ultimately control the trajectory of your life.
So try optimizing your environment if youĀ havenāt already. You wonāt be disappointed.
Number three: Stay true to yourself.
One of the biggest epiphanies I had in myĀ teenage years was that I could make almost anyone
love or like me, simply by adapting to the socialĀ circle I was in. Essentially, if I acted how other
people wanted me to act, and told them what theyĀ wanted to hear, I was able to fit in anywhere.
However one of the biggest epiphaniesĀ of my 20s was realizing that itās better
to just be yourself.
Not because it makes you more likeable, it absolutely doesnāt.
But because only by being yourself can you
find people who like you for who you are, ratherĀ than for the character you're pretending to be.
By pretending youāre someone youāreĀ not, you attract people who only like
the persona youāre portraying, not the true you.
Youāre just going to end up feelingĀ disconnected from those people.
And is their approval reallyĀ that important to you?
All the while, the people who wouldĀ have fallen in love with the true you,
they will pass you by, because thatĀ side of you is never presented.
But we are social creatures, and weĀ all struggle with finding balance
between being true to ourselves andĀ conforming to social expectations.
In the 1950s, Solomon Asch conducted a series ofĀ experiments that vividly illustrated how powerful
the need for social acceptance can be.
In his experiments, participants were asked to match the length of a line on one cardĀ
with one of three lines on another card.
While this task was veryĀ simple, it came with a twist.
In each session, there wasĀ only one real participant.
The rest of the group were actorsĀ who were in on the experiment.
For the first few rounds,Ā everyone gave correct answers.
But then in later rounds, the actors startedĀ to unanimously choose an obviously wrong line.
The real participant, unawareĀ of the setup, faced a dilemma:
Go with the obvious correct answer orĀ conform to the groupās incorrect choice.
Astonishingly, 72% of participants conformedĀ to the incorrect group opinion at least once,
even when the correct answer was clear.
Participants often reported feeling self-doubt and a desire to fit in with the group,
evenĀ when they knew the group's answer was wrong.
This experiment underscores the immenseĀ pressure to conform, even at the cost
of oneās own judgment and authenticity. It highlights our inherent need for social
acceptance, which can lead us to suppress ourĀ true selves in favor of fitting in with the group.
However, by doing so, we onlyĀ alienate ourselves further.
So next time you find yourself in a situationĀ where everyone seems to agree on something,
donāt be afraid to offer a differentĀ perspective, even if it feels challenging.
Itās also completely fineĀ to be wrong about something.
Be authentic, stay true to yourself,Ā as thatās the only way youāll find
the people that truly resonate with who you are.
Number four: Your mind needs rest as well.
We often advise people to take a break afterĀ physical activity, reminding them of the necessity
of rest and recovery for their bodies.
Yet, how often do we extend this advice
to those who have spent their dayĀ engaged in intense mental activity?
In todayās world, many jobsĀ demand significant mental effort.
Think of a programmer who spendsĀ the entire day writing code.
To an outsider it might seem likeĀ heās just chilling at his desk.
But his brain could be workingĀ a hundred miles per hour.
And this type of cognitive effort canĀ be just as draining as physical work,
despite not being measured as easily.
Now unfortunately, while physicalĀ exertion gets a free pass since itās
more tangible, mental exertion often does not.
Weāre told to suck it up and push further instead.
But just as our muscles need time toĀ recuperate after a strenuous workout,
our brains also need a break afterĀ prolonged periods of mental exertion.
And our brains are actually constantlyĀ working, whether we notice it or not.
When weāre studying, reading, or justĀ going about our day, weāre filtering
and sorting all the informationĀ weāve consumed throughout the day.
And yet, the need to rest our minds isĀ frequently overlooked and neglected.
However, it has to be noted thatĀ not every break is created equal.
Itās a common misconception that activitiesĀ like watching TV, scrolling through TikTok,
or browsing Instagram provide a mental break.
In reality, these activities only distract us while continuing to overload
our brains with new information.
This cycle of constant consumption is a commonĀ trap that prevents true mental relaxation.
What I suggest as a solution is a simpleĀ 30-minute walk, without any electronic devices.
This type of break allows ourĀ thoughts to run free and can
significantly recharge our mental batteries.
Activities where you keep the body active, but can turn the brain off, like:
walking, showering or doing mundane chores,
free us from the constant influx of new information and actually let our brains relax properly.
Not only that, but youāll also find that you tendĀ to get your best ideas during these activities,
as they allow you to finally stop overloadingĀ your brain and process all the information.
A prevalent issue among insomniacs is theĀ inability to quiet their ruminating minds at night.
As they lie in bed, trying to fall asleep,Ā they often find themselves mulling over the
day's events and worrying about the future.
This mental overload happens because bedtime
is often the only break theirĀ brain gets throughout the day.
So if you want to maintain your mental health andĀ productivity, it's essential to give your mind the
rest it deserves, by not consuming more content.
Give it a proper break, let it rest and run free.
Number five: Manage your energy, not your time.
This is a slightly different approach toĀ productivity that is often not considered.
But basically what it hopes to achieve, is toĀ align your tasks with your natural energy rhythms.
Throughout the day, our energy levels fluctuate,
creating periods of highĀ focus and times of fatigue.
And through personal experience,Ā Iāve discovered that scheduling my
most important work around my peak energyĀ time significantly enhances my ability to
produce high quality work and with greater ease.
All the while my less important tasks are best
scheduled when Iām not as energetic, since IĀ donāt have to be as focused to do them well.
And identifying my energy peaks and droughtsĀ has been one of the best ways Iāve managed
to increase my overall productivity.
This strategy has two main benefits.
Firstly, it has allowed me toĀ reduce my work hours dramatically.
Instead of working for sixĀ hours with moderate results,
I can achieve 80% of the same workload in justĀ two hours by working during my energy peak.
Because my most demanding work receives my bestĀ attention, I simply donāt have to spend as much
time on it, since Iām able to do complexĀ tasks with greater clarity and efficiency.
Traditional time management techniques,Ā which focus on organizing hours and minutes,
regardless of my own biology,Ā simply cannot match the results.
And secondly this strategy encouragesĀ a healthier work-life balance.
Since I spend less time working,
it frees up more hours in the day forĀ rest, relaxation, and personal pursuits.
Iāve mentioned earlier how youĀ should give your mind a break.
But unfortunately many people look at breaks as aĀ waste of time or they feel guilty for taking them.
However, they are absolutely required ifĀ you want to work at your peak.
You canāt do your best work if youāre exhausted.
Breaks ensure that youāre recharged and ready to perform at your bestĀ during the next energy peak period.
And since work gets done faster, thereĀ shouldnāt be any guilt for having some rest.
Of course it's important to recognizeĀ that this approach may not be as easily
applied to manual labor, which oftenĀ requires consistent physical effort.
Nonetheless, it can still be useful to scheduleĀ physically demanding tasks during times of
higher physical energy in order to maintainĀ stamina and reduce the risk of injury.
Still, this method encourages aĀ more intentional approach to work,
where the quality of effort you put in isĀ prioritized over the amount of time spent working.
And it leads to a more effective,Ā satisfying and sustainable work experience.
Number six: Have a good day, have a great life.
What does it mean to live a great life?
Is it having a well-paying job or a lot of money?
Is it about fame and status,
or maybe itās traveling the worldĀ and learning about other cultures?
Perhaps itās having greatĀ relationships and a loving family?
One could argue that all these thingsĀ contribute to a fulfilling life.
However, when you break everythingĀ apart, what it eventually boils down to is having good days consistently.
Because what life really is, is a string of days.
And if you can make your averageĀ day good, youāll live a great life.
This is a simple, yet for many,Ā a very profound realization.
Yes, we all experience bad days, andĀ we all have amazing days as well.
There are certain big events that bringĀ us immense joy and pleasure, as well as
those that cause significant dips in our mood.
Think of going on an amazing vacation or attending
a fantastic party, compared to catching a coldĀ or dealing with the drudgery of doing taxes.
But these events are just that: events.
They are merely anomalies that occasionallyĀ find their way into our everyday lives.
If you really think about it, most ofĀ our days are actually routine, and itās
those days that you should look to improve,Ā rather than just focusing on the big events.
However, if you look closely,Ā many people have it backwards.
Most go into jobs they absolutely hate,
enduring misery for 50 weeks a year justĀ to enjoy a lavish 2 week vacation.
To me, that doesnāt sound appealing at all.
50 weeks of misery for 2 weeks of enjoyment.
The proportions are all off.
But Iām not one to judge, as forĀ the longest time I was that person.
Chasing success and money, not realizing itĀ was causing me an immense amount of despair.
It took me many years to change my perspective,Ā but it was one of the best decisions I made.
My average day is now actually somethingĀ I look forward to, instead of dread.
Of course many people wouldĀ consider my usual day boring,
but Iāve structured it in such a way that IĀ enjoy it, and thatās all that really matters.
After all, itās my day andĀ my life, not anyone elseās.
And I encourage you to do theĀ same. Make YOUR average day better.
Whatever that means for you.
A great life is not built on the
occasional grand events but on theĀ consistent joy of everyday moments.
And itās only by finding contentmentĀ in the routine, the ordinary,
and the mundane, that youāre able to layĀ the foundation for a truly great life.
So those were the 6 lessons I wish I hadĀ learned sooner, and are now rules that I follow.
Iām sure that over time IāllĀ add some more to the list.
Now Iām also interested in what some ofĀ yours are.
Let me know whatās something youāve learned that you wish you hadĀ known sooner, or what is something
that you follow and has served you wellĀ over time.
Leave a comment down below.
As always thanks for watching,Ā and Iāll see you in the next one.
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