Offene Ehe, Polyamorie: Wie kann das funktionieren? I 37 Grad
Summary
TLDRThe video explores various forms of consensual non-monogamy like open relationships and polyamory, profiling couples who practice them. It examines their motivations, communication, and jealousy management. Their stories reveal complex emotions as they negotiate boundaries, reconnect deeply, and sometime fall in love outside their primary partnership. The video considers larger questions about the nature of fidelity, possessiveness and how we define love and family. It makes space for different relationship models while exploring the social stigma and personal struggles people face when stepping outside standard cultural norms.
Takeaways
- 😊 In Germany, 1 in 3 monogamous relationships involve cheating. 30% of marriages end in divorce.
- 🤔 Svenja and Johannes opened their marriage 3 years ago to avoid cheating. They can have sex with others but no deep feelings.
- 😍 Paula lives with and loves two men, Angelo and Christoph. She has felt attracted to multiple people since she was young.
- 💑 Paula sees her relationship with two men as just a normal relationship, except with three people.
- 🥰 Paula, Angelo and Christoph own a house together and co-parent their daughter Fiona.
- 😕 Both couples have experienced jealousy, but worked through it by communication and self-reflection.
- 🤨 Open relationships are criticized, especially towards women, as going against societal norms.
- 😠 Some parents of the polyamorous partners react negatively and cannot accept their lifestyle.
- 💞 The couples feel their openness strengthens their relationships by fulfilling different needs.
- 🧐 The couples question conventional ideas of fidelity and believe you can love multiple people.
Q & A
What is the living situation of Paula, Angelo, and Christoph?
-Paula lives with her husband Angelo, whom she has been with for 8 years, and her partner Christoph, whom she has been with for 5 years. The three of them bought a house together in the Lüneburger Heide 3 years ago.
Why did Svenja and Johannes decide to open up their relationship?
-Johannes had cheated on Svenja earlier in their relationship. Instead of ending things, they decided to openly discuss desires for other partners and agree to an open relationship based on honesty and communication.
How do Paula and her partners manage feelings of jealousy?
-They recognize that jealousy often arises from other feelings like fear, grief, anger, and insecurity. Open communication about needs and transparency helps them manage difficult emotions.
What are some of the social stigmas Paula and her partners face?
-They face criticism that children should have one mom and one dad, that something must be wrong with society to accept their lifestyle, and that Paula can't be taken seriously as a woman for choosing to love two male partners.
How did Paula's parents react when they found out about her polyamorous relationship?
-Paula was shocked because her parents, who had always fully accepted her choices before, responded very negatively. They acted like she had lost her sanity and couldn't make sound decisions anymore.
How do Christoph and Angelo feel about legal marriage to Paula?
-They both say they would like the ability to legally marry Paula as a third partner, taking her last name, because it would affirm Christoph's membership in their family.
What are Johannes' parents' perspectives on open relationships?
-While they don't fully understand it, they feel that as long as Svenja and Johannes have mutually agreed to it, it is better than secretly cheating in a relationship that appears happy from the outside.
How have Svenja and Johannes set boundaries regarding emotional attachments?
-They try not to let outside relationships become too emotionally entangled or affect their day-to-day family life. If deeper feelings emerge, they openly communicate about it with each other.
How do the couples explain what love is?
-They see love as a profound connection, a "happening to you" rather than something you can control. Socialization plays a big role - we learn how to love from family, culture, and past experiences.
What connections exist between the two couples featured?
-Svenja works as a relationship coach and is publicly open about her lifestyle, facing criticism online. Paula's husband Christoph was good friends with Paula and Angelo as a couple before becoming Paula's second partner.
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