The ONE trait of high performance individuals

Nicolai Langfeldt
5 Aug 202418:13

Summary

TLDRIn this video, the speaker explores the concept of stress tolerance as the key differentiator between being good and being great. Drawing from his military and special forces training experience, he emphasizes that in any field, from sales to special operations, the ability to handle stress and maintain composure under pressure is crucial. The speaker advocates for setting higher personal standards to increase stress tolerance, which in turn leads to achieving greatness. He shares practical advice on how to develop this skill, suggesting exposure to stress as the primary method, and encourages viewers to embrace challenges and strive for excellence.

Takeaways

  • 😌 The distinction between being good and being great often lies in one's ability to handle stress.
  • 🤔 The speaker reflects on his military experience and questions what qualities allowed him to endure special forces training.
  • 💡 Stress tolerance is identified as the common factor that separates those who are good from those who are great.
  • 📚 In the modern age, where information is abundant, anyone can become good at something, but stress tolerance is what propels one to greatness.
  • 🏋️‍♂️ The speaker emphasizes that physical strength or intelligence alone isn't enough; it's the ability to handle stress that truly matters.
  • 🚀 To develop stress tolerance, one must set higher standards for themselves and be willing to take on more stress.
  • 🛠️ Exposure to stress is the key to developing stress tolerance, and it's a skill that can't be bought or easily acquired.
  • 💼 The concept of stress tolerance applies to various fields, including sales, entrepreneurship, and leadership.
  • 🔁 The speaker suggests that by raising our standards and enduring the associated stress, we build resilience and capability.
  • 🌟 The speaker encourages viewers to not be ashamed of striving for greatness and to embrace the process of developing stress tolerance.

Q & A

  • What is the main difference between being good and being great according to the speaker?

    -The main difference between being good and being great, according to the speaker, is stress tolerance. The ability to handle more stress than others is what separates the great from the good.

  • Why did the speaker ask himself what made him capable of being in special forces training?

    -The speaker asked himself what made him capable of being in special forces training because he was in a privileged position to go through a certain amount of pain and learn amazing things, and he was curious about what qualities allowed him to be there rather than somewhere else.

  • What is the common denominator that the speaker identifies for greatness?

    -The common denominator that the speaker identifies for greatness is stress tolerance, which he believes is the one skill that can make someone great at anything.

  • How does the speaker suggest developing high stress tolerance?

    -The speaker suggests developing high stress tolerance through exposure therapy, which involves consistently putting oneself in stressful situations to build the ability to handle stress.

  • Why does the speaker emphasize the importance of setting higher standards?

    -The speaker emphasizes the importance of setting higher standards because higher standards lead to higher stress tolerance, which is necessary to achieve greatness.

  • What role does stress play in the speaker's view of personal development?

    -In the speaker's view, stress plays a crucial role in personal development as it is the primary factor that tests and builds one's capacity to handle pressure, which is essential for achieving greatness.

  • How does the speaker relate his military experience to the concept of stress tolerance?

    -The speaker relates his military experience to stress tolerance by drawing parallels between the physical and mental stress of special forces training and the stress encountered in other high-stress environments, such as sales or entrepreneurship.

  • What does the speaker suggest as a practical way to increase stress tolerance?

    -The speaker suggests increasing stress tolerance by taking on more work, setting higher goals, and practicing in areas that naturally induce stress, such as sales or physical training.

  • Why does the speaker believe that stress tolerance is not something that can be purchased or easily acquired?

    -The speaker believes that stress tolerance is not something that can be purchased or easily acquired because it requires personal experience and exposure to stress, which builds resilience over time.

  • How does the speaker define success in the context of stress management?

    -In the context of stress management, the speaker defines success as the ability to take on more stress, manage it effectively, and continue to perform at a high level despite the pressure.

  • What is the speaker's advice for those who want to improve their stress tolerance?

    -The speaker's advice for improving stress tolerance is to actively seek out and expose oneself to stressful situations, to practice managing stress, and to continually raise personal standards to challenge oneself.

Outlines

00:00

💪 The Essence of Greatness: Stress Tolerance

The speaker begins by posing a thought experiment about identifying the top 1% in a group of 100 people and what qualities would set them apart. Drawing from his military experience, particularly his time in special forces training, he reflects on the question of why he was able to endure the rigorous training while others may not have been. He emphasizes the importance of stress tolerance as the key differentiator between being good and being great. The speaker shares that in various fields, from sales to military operations, it's the ability to handle stress that often leads to success. He concludes by suggesting that anyone can become great by developing a high stress tolerance, which is a skill that can be honed through exposure to stress.

05:00

🚪 Knocking on Doors to Success: Stress Management in Sales

In this paragraph, the speaker uses the analogy of a salesperson knocking on doors to illustrate how stress management plays a crucial role in success. He discusses the pressures of not being able to pay rent and how a salesperson must handle this stress by knocking on more doors. The speaker highlights that while many people are good at their jobs, they often lack the stress tolerance to push through challenges and achieve greatness. He shares his own experience from special forces selection, where he was close to giving up but managed to persevere by setting small goals for himself. The speaker emphasizes that it's not just about physical strength or intelligence, but the ability to manage stress under pressure that truly sets individuals apart.

10:01

🏋️‍♂️ Raising the Bar: The Path to Greatness

The speaker delves into the concept of setting higher standards as a means to develop greater stress tolerance. He argues that by aiming for higher standards, one naturally encounters more stress, which, if managed effectively, can lead to greatness. Using sales as an example again, he suggests that increasing one's daily goals, such as knocking on more doors, can help build the necessary resilience. The speaker also touches on the idea that leadership roles, such as being a squad leader in the military, often require higher stress tolerance due to the increased responsibilities. He concludes by encouraging individuals to raise their standards in all aspects of life, from physical fitness to personal goals, as a way to build the stress tolerance needed to achieve greatness.

15:02

🛠️ Building Resilience: The Catalyst for Personal Growth

In the final paragraph, the speaker reflects on his journey in the military and how the demanding environment was a catalyst for developing his stress tolerance. He shares the importance of recognizing the progress made and the need to continually set higher standards to keep growing. The speaker emphasizes that life is inherently stressful, and those who can manage stress effectively will find success in various aspects of life, including relationships and career. He concludes by encouraging the audience to embrace the challenge of stress, to find ways to manage it, and to appreciate the growth that comes from overcoming these challenges. The speaker's message is one of perseverance and the belief that with the right mindset and approach, anyone can achieve greatness.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Stress Tolerance

Stress tolerance refers to an individual's ability to manage, cope with, and perform well under pressure or in stressful situations. In the video, it is highlighted as the key differentiator between being good and being great. The speaker emphasizes that anyone can become good at something with access to information and tools, but it's the ability to handle stress that propels one to greatness. For instance, the speaker mentions his experience in the military and special forces training, where stress tolerance was crucial for success, not just physical strength or intelligence.

💡Special Forces Training

Special Forces Training is an intensive and rigorous program designed to prepare military personnel for elite operations. It is used in the video as an example of an environment where stress tolerance is critical. The speaker reflects on his own experience in such training to illustrate how stress tolerance, rather than just physical fitness or intelligence, was the key to enduring the challenges and making it through the selection process.

💡Sales

Sales is the process of selling products or services to customers in exchange for money. In the video, the concept of sales is used as a metaphor for facing and overcoming stress. The speaker's friend, a master at sales, is mentioned to convey the idea that high stress tolerance is essential for success in sales, as one must handle the pressure of meeting targets and dealing with rejection.

💡Entrepreneurship

Entrepreneurship is the process of designing, launching, and running a new business, which often starts as a small business, such as a startup company, offering a product, process, or service for sale. The video touches on the theme of entrepreneurship, suggesting that stress tolerance is a vital trait for entrepreneurs who must manage various challenges and uncertainties inherent in building and growing a business.

💡Standards

Standards refer to the level of quality or attainment expected in a particular field. In the video, the speaker argues for setting higher standards as a means to develop greater stress tolerance. By aiming higher, one invites more stress but also the opportunity to grow and excel. The speaker encourages viewers to raise their personal standards as a way to push beyond their current capabilities and achieve greatness.

💡Exposure Therapy

Exposure therapy is a psychological treatment method that exposes individuals to the sources of their stress or anxiety in a controlled manner to help them overcome their fears. The speaker mentions exposure therapy as the primary method for developing stress tolerance. He suggests that by intentionally putting oneself in stressful situations, one can build resilience and the ability to handle stress more effectively.

💡Leadership

Leadership involves the ability to guide, direct, and influence others towards achieving goals. In the video, leadership is discussed in the context of the military, where leaders, such as squad leaders, must have high stress tolerance to manage the demands and responsibilities of their role. The speaker implies that leadership often comes with increased stress, and the ability to handle this stress is a mark of effective leadership.

💡Performance Under Pressure

Performance under pressure refers to the ability to maintain or improve one's performance despite challenging or stressful circumstances. The video emphasizes that those who can perform well under pressure, due to their stress tolerance, are more likely to achieve great things. The speaker uses the analogy of salespeople who continue to perform despite the stress of not meeting their sales targets.

💡Personal Development

Personal development encompasses the activities that individuals engage in to improve their awareness, knowledge, and skills. In the video, personal development is linked to the cultivation of stress tolerance. The speaker suggests that by challenging oneself and stepping out of one's comfort zone, one can develop the resilience and stress management skills necessary for personal growth and success.

💡Mission Clarity

Mission clarity refers to having a clear understanding of one's goals and objectives. The video suggests that maintaining clarity of mission, even under stress, is crucial for success. The speaker implies that those with high stress tolerance are able to stay focused on their mission, regardless of the challenges they face, which is a key factor in achieving greatness.

Highlights

The key difference between being good and being great is stress tolerance.

In a group of 100 people, the top 1% who are great have a higher stress tolerance.

The speaker's military experience and special forces training emphasized the importance of stress tolerance.

Being able to handle stress is more critical than physical strength or intelligence in achieving greatness.

In sales, as in many fields, the ability to manage stress is what separates the good from the great.

Stress tolerance is the common denominator that allows individuals to excel in their chosen fields.

The speaker shares personal anecdotes from his military service to illustrate the importance of stress tolerance.

Raising one's standards is a key strategy for developing higher stress tolerance.

Exposure to stress and learning to manage it is the only way to develop stress tolerance.

The speaker emphasizes that there are no shortcuts or hacks to develop stress tolerance; it requires consistent effort.

Setting higher standards for oneself is the first step towards developing greater stress tolerance.

The speaker discusses the correlation between high standards and the ability to handle stress.

Entrepreneurship often involves managing stress to help others, which is a key aspect of sales and business.

The speaker shares insights on how to develop stress tolerance through consistent practice and challenging oneself.

The willingness to take on more stress and learn to manage it is essential for achieving greatness.

The speaker concludes by encouraging the audience to never be ashamed of striving for greatness and developing stress tolerance.

Transcripts

play00:00

boom guys we're back listen we're going

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to talk about what separates someone

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from being good and what separates

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someone from being great that's it all

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right let's get into it straight away no

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fuss no [ __ ] all right listen here's

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an experiment for you if you had to pick

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you have a group of 100 people okay 100

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people you have a group of 100 people

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okay and you have to pick certain amount

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of people right let's say 10

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let's say one then it makes it 1% right

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that makes it cool so that makes hip

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maybe you can relate maybe you seen the

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top 1% disappear for one month and do

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this right whatever um if you had to

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pick one person out of that what would

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you look for in order for them to be in

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order to recognize if they could be

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great or not what would you look for

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I'll give you a

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second I know and I'll give you the

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answer in a second but listen

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when I was back in back in the military

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right I served in the military for six

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years many of you know this I went to

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special forces training and I had this

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question I asked myself this question

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because I was very in a very privileged

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position of being able to go through a

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certain amount of pain and be in the

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position where I was learning all this

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amazing stuff and I'm so grateful that I

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learned all this stuff and that I met

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all these amazing people if anyone you

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are anyone of you are watching this

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right now God bless you really

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appreciate you everything I learned from

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you and I asked myself this question and

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and people weren't that you know

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animated by this question maybe not it's

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me you

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know uh but the question was like why

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was I there why was I able be why was I

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there at all why was I not somewhere

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else why was I able to be there I ask

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myself that because it's a very it's

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it's a it's somewhere to be that it's

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not easy to do right it's it's a very

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difficult thing to do uh so I was like

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hey what is it that's in me that allows

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me to do do this and what is it that

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it's in all of us our Squad everyone who

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was there what what is it that we can do

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that most people

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cannot and I asked myself that and I

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never got an answer for it and I by

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random I asked myself the same question

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yesterday when I was walking home from

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the city um I asked myself the same

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question uh now of course these days I

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know a lot more of the world I've seen a

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lot more of the world I've seen the the

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met with other entrepreneurs I I've

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trained with a lot of entrepreneurs uh I

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know I've seen more of the world uh

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different stuff so I I'm able to answer

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this question and ask myself this

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question in a in a broader way a broader

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spectrum because it's not just about

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special forces training and so for uh I

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for this example right let's do this

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example CU I had this conversation with

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my friend of mine cuz I was very curious

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about about this right and he's a master

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at sales and so we we got to the

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conclusion that if you want to be great

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at

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something the one skill and I for this

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if you were to look at what this one

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person needed to have in order to be

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great the one thing you need is stress

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tolerance stress tolerance that's the

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one common denominator that separates

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good from great in these day this day

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and age right we have information so

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read readily available anyone can get

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good at something you can choose you can

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literally pick anything whether that be

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making bird houses or recording amazing

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YouTube

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videos uh whatever it is um I'm trying

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to look around for examples right now

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but I don't have building skyscrapers

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yeah that's a good one whatever it is

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you can be good at it because you have

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so much information you have all these

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tools out there for actually how to

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become good now in order to become great

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stress tolerance being able to take upon

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you more stress than other people that's

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going to do a lot for you and I found

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and just by realizing that I found out

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exactly why like I was able to do the

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special forces selection why I was able

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to go through the training because I

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there's because it's not muscle right

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cuz if it was muscle it would just be

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bodybuilders in there and it's not the

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smartest cuz then it would just be all

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these Geeks in there there right but

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it's not just Geeks you know it's a

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different kind of kind of geek but it it

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is what it is right it is the people

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have the higher stress tolerance because

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like you put on your backpack and it

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hurts a lot but then you have all these

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things on your mind Hey when we get

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there we have to do this we have to

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crawl through this and there's all the

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all always stress your enemy is behind

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you this that this that and so you take

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all all this stress and it's how you

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manage it how calm you're under the

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pressure so for example for something

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like sales right um you because my

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friend is uh

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salesman um and it's like hey I've been

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knocking 15 doors uh I can't pay my rent

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now uh I that stress that you have how

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do you manage it well you go and lock

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lot more doors right so you manage that

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stress and most people most people are

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good right people who are good they you

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know they can't handle that they they

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can't handle the pressure that's in here

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the stress that goes on the uncertainty

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hey I haven't made any commissions today

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right

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and so they quit and that's the same

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it's the same with the Special Forces

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selection right I know more special

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force selection than the sales store but

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um because it's like you want to special

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for elction and there's all these stuff

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on the mind hey oh my God the instructor

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said this oh my God I'm on the back foot

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uh I was almost there guys I was almost

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there when during like the final week we

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were doing all this uh walking with our

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backpacks and I was at the very very

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bottom very no very uh far back from the

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pack and there was I was so close to

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just throwing in the towel so close I

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don't know why I did I made these

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checkpoints along the way and I was like

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here can we go one more yeah okay we

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went there we go one more yeah we went

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there go one more so split it up like

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that that's a big big technique by the

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way um but um the the stress of being

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like Oh my God this could happen this

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could happen this could happen there all

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these factors the stress that comes into

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your mind it's how you deal how you

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manage that that really separates you

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that's the only thing it's a common

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Theon and then cuz like many people will

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probably see this and be like well yeah

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it's not just that you can just be good

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at handling stress and then just good at

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anything now of course but like I said

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if you had to pick one person out of

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these 100 to become great at anything

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then stress tolerance would be the best

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and most precise thing to look for in

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order to be great because if if you have

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high stress tolerance and you can learn

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something then you can take that to an

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unimaginable level just like you can

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teach you can teach any Soldier to be

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good but if they have a higher stress to

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you can teach them to be great you can

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put more stuff on them you can put you

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can put heavier loads in the backpack so

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their backs hurt more and while their

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backs hurt more you can give them more

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orders like a Salesman for example I can

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only give this example right um You can

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tell them that hey you have to manage

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this sales team for example that that's

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more stress now you're taking up the

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stress of all these other people for

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example I I've never ran a sales team so

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I don't know but you know I use these

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examples

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but um and you can just extrapolate this

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into anything taking upon you more

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stress and that excels you further right

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the guy on has a whole sales team has to

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have a lot more

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stress and but he's going to be be

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better right obviously you don't put an

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idiot there uh just like um you don't

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give extra stress to soldiers who can't

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handle it and so you see that the

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separation is there the separation is

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there who who can manage the stress that

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is given to them and when it comes to

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like life in general life for this if

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you want to have quality you're going to

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have like the more stress you can take

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on the better relationships is stress

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money is stress family is stress but and

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being able to absorb all that input stay

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clear on your mission with all that

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stress that's going to do a lot for you

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that's going to do so much for you I

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swear to God stress to is the biggest

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thing the biggest thing that you can

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ever like develop and I'm going to tell

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you how to develop it too okay there's

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techniques for this how to develop high

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stress tolerance and it's not going to

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be something that you're going to like

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but

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essentially it's just exposure therapy

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end of story right you should probably

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click off this video right now and go

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you know get yourself under some stress

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exposure to stress the only way to learn

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stress there's no hacks no gimmicks no

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nothing you can't purchase it which is

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why this is such an amazing thing

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because it really it really separates

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anyone like it really separates people

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like like if you could just if it we

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didn't have that to separate it then you

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would there wouldn't be like levels it

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would good end the story right or you

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can just get more information apply it

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boom right but since we have that stress

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and the stress chall that's a factor now

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we can see who's really great and who's

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really good and it's an amazing thing

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never be ashamed of wanting to be better

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guys never be ashamed of it I know a lot

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of you guys watch my videos you young

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guys never be ashamed never apologize

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for going out there and trying to be

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great you don't have to apologize for

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that it's completely legal who's going

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to arrest you huh who's going to arrest

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you tell me right cuz you know I might

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have to barricade my doors you know cuz

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I'm [ __ ] awesome but anyways um I

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don't think the handcuffs would fit

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anyways but anyways right this weard

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that um you have to you have to be have

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good stress right and like a great way

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of going about this is to get into stuff

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like sales like fighting like going to

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the gym and not doing the average guys

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why are we doing the average why we why

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we set our standards so low if uh if if

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we really want to be

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great then first of all we have to set

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higher standards and higher standards is

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going to require higher stress tolerance

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but if we set a higher standard

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for what we want right higher stress

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tolerance stress more stress higher

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standard up here okay that's higher

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higher standards right here more stress

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if we then lower the standards we don't

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get that we don't get the stress to that

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doesn't follow that's only at the top

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that's only with the high standards

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that's when you get the stress tolerance

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you don't get it down

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here so the first step to all this is

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setting a higher standard for ourselves

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it's hey like I use I like to use sales

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examples cuz is really really is an

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amazing thing um the first Stander is uh

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Hey for example for this hey I like the

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normal is doing like knocking like 10

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doors a day I'm going to go with the out

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there and knock 20 now we have some

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somewhere to actually start adopting

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this because first of all we probably

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only have the same time as the guy who's

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knocking 10 doors and so we have to do

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20 hey we have to we have to up our

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skill so everything as long as we just

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raise our standards we get higher stress

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tolerance because of all these factors

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going to going to play time the skill we

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have to practice we have to practice our

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script whatever um for

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something along the lines of a military

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thing it's usually more high stress

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tolerance is put on uh leaders right

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because they have to manage all these

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things so for like a a squad leader it's

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like hey we have to do this this this

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this this this all these things to think

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about um and really what when it comes

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to like being a squad leader and that

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it's like higher

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standards is correlated with stress

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tolerance because it's always been like

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hey we can do better we can do better we

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can do better and then you see this as

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you go further down it's like the the

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the the we can do better part it just

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diminishes and you see that correlation

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between high standards and high stress

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tolerance and so just chasing high

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stress tolerance by itself is very

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difficult that's why I'm explaining this

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to you it's like hey go out there and

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build stress tolerance okay what the

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hell do I do right well you raise your

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standards you raise your standards

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that's what you do when you next time

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you go in the gym you're going to do way

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more you're going to be there longer

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than everyone else you're going to be

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there longer than that one guy that one

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guy who looks like a douchebag you have

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that guy in the gym probably you're

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going to be there longer than him and

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you don't care how long that that has to

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be CU you set High your standard for

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yourself hey I'm going to be here longer

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I'm going to do more work I'm going to

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do more work than this this this this

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this right um whatever ever way you can

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find a like to set raise your standard

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standards that's going to you know end

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up in you developing that solers because

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you have all these factors that's going

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to come in and you're going to have to

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deal with so uh that's really really

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good on how to become great it's just

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about raising your standards essentially

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but you need to like apply it properly

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um it's such

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uh it's such a

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easy thing to see once you you you rise

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to the standard for quite a while you

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you see that hey this isn't that

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difficult and why isn't that difficult

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well because you have a higher stress

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tolerance now um you can take on more

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work uh you're comfortable with that and

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so you keep growing just like that but

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it's

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uh it's not that you keep doing the

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normal and expect any results you got to

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do something differently

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you have to you have to do something

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differently whether that be somewhere

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it's

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like you knock x amount more doors or

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where it's some there like you are able

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to go the distance like a a special

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forces election there's always going to

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be more work to do and

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so in the end this all comes down to how

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much work are you willing to put in and

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it's all just comes back to like stress

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stress stress life is stress guys come

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on what are we talking about here life

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is stress anyone who says otherwise is

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lazy

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um but it's very interesting cuz you

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learn this you learn this too when you

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start on the entrepreneurial path and

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start doing stuff and could you learn

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that sales and stuff is just taking

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stress away from

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people like any good like entrepreneur

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they understand that hey if I can just

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take away more stress that's

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so that's first of all that's helping

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sales guys is helping that's one thing

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it's it's really is sales is not

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something you do to like try and get

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money from people it's to help people

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that's what we're doing right that's

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what I do I help people I take stress

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away from them that's a part of that

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helping and it works wonders right it

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works

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wonders because that's what we're doing

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uh and you see that like with people who

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like have big companies right they have

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to manage all this stuff they have to

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manage everything they have all these

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stress all these input that come in hey

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we have to fix this this this this this

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this this this and it's not like you

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have to be that on that uh path all the

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time it's not like it's going to be like

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stress forever but it's like a muscle

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the stress tolerance like you raise your

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standards you you work towards those

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standards for quite some time now we've

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built we we've been become stronger

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because you can ex you can imagine like

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once you've built this thing or once you

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passed the special force elction once

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you've done all that then you don't have

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the stress of that anymore and so this

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by not doing this by not raising our

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standards and trying to develop this

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we're actually just shooting oursel in

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the foot because then everything will be

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difficult but if we go through this and

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if we go through the emotions we go

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through the actions that this requires

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then we will see that everything becomes

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easy in the end everything will become

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easy and I like I'm just so grateful

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that I had to like I could do this in a

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very uh in a way where I I could just be

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told what to do essentially which

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essentially what I'm doing right now to

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do you I'm telling you they go out and

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do this uh but but I was in the military

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and so uh I was in position where it's

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like okay well we have to do this

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because that's like an order so I just

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developed this as a part of it but it's

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not just like you you you you get to be

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told and then you just go through the

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emotions you have to kind of have the

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realization too hey I'm I'm at this

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level now I used to be

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here um because I seen a lot of people

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they they they all go through the same

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motions as me and they don't develop the

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higher stress tolerance you kind of have

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to realize that hey we're setting the

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standard you have to develop that higher

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standard too that's something I learned

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back in the Special Forces um by just

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being around them I didn't have that

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that much back in the conventional

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forces but I learned that hey there's

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all stuff to do always stuff to do it's

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always you know better and that was

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really really a cataclyst for me a

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catalyst for me to to to to start that

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and I that's what I want to share with

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you guys just that hey there's always

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more hate is always what's next um and

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that's going to do a lot for you I swear

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to God stress tolerance is what we get

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you there it's the one thing okay don't

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worry about anything else just worry

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about hey taking on more stress see how

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much you can manage learn to manage it

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find find ways find any way to manage it

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and you'll see some amazing results all

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right don't want to drag this on for too

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too much longer hope you guys enjoyed

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take care and God bless boo

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Related Tags
Stress ToleranceGreatnessStandardsPersonal GrowthEntrepreneurshipSales MasteryPerformanceLeadershipSpecial ForcesSelf-Improvement