How to Discern | LITTLE BY LITTLE | Fr Columba Jordan CFR

Summary

The speaker discusses the importance of discernment in deepening one's spiritual life. They emphasize that discernment is about prayerfully determining God's specific will for an individual, not just choosing between good options. The process involves seeking holy indifference, being unattached to personal desires, and listening for God's guidance through feelings of love, joy, and peace. The speaker highlights the significance of surrendering all aspects of life to God, ensuring actions align with His will, and experiencing the grace and fulfillment that comes with it.

Takeaways

• 🎯 Discernment is key to deepening your spiritual life and understanding God's will.
• 🙏 A daily prayer practice is essential for effective discernment; aim for at least 30 minutes a day.
• 🎒 Holy indifference is crucial—detach from unhelpful attachments and focus on God's will.
• 📝 Keep a list of significant decisions you need to discern, avoiding trivial matters.
• 🧘‍♂️ Achieving peace and calm before discernment helps ensure you're ready to receive God's guidance.
• 🌟 Consolation, characterized by love, joy, and peace, is a clear indicator of God's 'yes.'
• 🚫 If you feel no movement in your heart, it's likely a 'no'—don't be afraid to say no to others.
• 📜 Regularly return to the grace of your discernment to stay focused and aligned with God's will.
• 💡 Practicing discernment reduces stress and increases joy by ensuring you act in accordance with God's desires.
• 🌍 Discernment isn't just about making decisions; it's about surrendering all aspects of your life to God.

Q & A

What is the most necessary thing to enhance one's spiritual life, according to the speaker?

The speaker suggests that discernment is the most necessary thing to enhance one's spiritual life. It involves prayerful consideration to understand God's will and make decisions that align with it.

How does the speaker define discernment in a Christian context?

Discernment is defined as a prayerful process of deciding what actions to take by understanding what God wants rather than just choosing from multiple good options.

What are the preliminary steps to discernment mentioned in the script?

The preliminary steps to discernment include living a serious Christian life, regularly praying for at least half an hour daily, and ensuring one is not in a state of spiritual desolation.

What is meant by 'holy indifference' in the context of discernment?

Holy indifference refers to a state of being free from any attachment or aversion towards any outcome, allowing a person to be open to whatever God wills without personal biases.

What does the speaker recommend doing if someone struggles to achieve 'holy indifference'?

The speaker recommends praying for grace, making acts of faith, expressing gratitude, and surrendering any attachments or fears to God to achieve 'holy indifference'.

What should one do if they experience fear or doubt during discernment?

If fear or doubt arises, one should return to the preparatory steps such as making acts of faith, expressing gratitude, and trusting that God will make His will clear.

How does the speaker suggest determining God's 'yes' or 'no' in discernment?

The speaker suggests asking God directly for clarity and then listening for movements of the heart, such as feelings of peace, joy, love (for a 'yes'), or a sense of neutrality or lack of feeling (for a 'no').

What role does 'consolation' play in the process of discernment?

Consolation, which can manifest as love, joy, peace, or other positive movements of the heart, is seen as a sign of God's 'yes' or affirmation during the discernment process.

Why does the speaker emphasize the importance of not questioning a decision once discerned?

The speaker emphasizes this to prevent confusion and doubt, which can disrupt the clarity achieved through discernment. Sticking to the discerned decision allows for a stronger faith and trust in God's guidance.

What does the speaker suggest doing if the discernment is unclear after a session of prayer?

If discernment remains unclear, the speaker suggests pausing the discernment process and returning to it the next day. It is important not to rush but to wait for clear guidance from God.

How can returning to the 'grace of the discernment' help during moments of doubt or confusion?

Returning to the 'grace of the discernment' involves recalling the feelings and experiences of peace and clarity felt during discernment. This helps reaffirm the decision made and strengthens confidence in God's guidance.

Outlines

00:00

🔥 Igniting Your Spiritual Journey

The speaker discusses the importance of discernment in deepening one's spiritual journey. They emphasize that while being committed to prayer and sacraments is crucial, the key to advancing further in faith is discernment—understanding not just what is good, but what is God's specific will for you. The speaker dispels the myth that discernment is complicated, reassuring that it can be straightforward by asking Jesus for clarity and looking for signs of consolation, such as love, joy, and peace.

05:00

🛠️ The Process of Holy Indifference

The concept of 'holy indifference' is explained as being detached from anything that isn't aligned with God's will. The speaker advises that before beginning the discernment process, one must achieve a state where they are indifferent to personal desires, whether it be enthusiasm or aversion. The goal is to be solely focused on God's will, free from unhelpful attachments. The speaker shares their own practice of daily discernment prayer, emphasizing the importance of being prepared and in the right spiritual mindset before making decisions.

10:01

🎯 Sharpening Your Discernment

The speaker provides practical steps to discern God's will, such as asking for clear signs of consolation and paying attention to movements of the heart. They stress the importance of patience and being attentive to how God communicates through feelings of peace, joy, and love. The speaker also highlights the significance of recording these experiences in a journal and revisiting them to reinforce confidence in the discernment. They share personal experiences of how this method has led to powerful and clear guidance, reducing stress and increasing joy in following God's will.

Keywords

💡Discernment

Discernment refers to the process of prayerfully considering and determining the best course of action, particularly in the context of following God's will. In the video, discernment is emphasized as crucial for deepening one's spiritual life and ensuring that actions align with God's specific desires, rather than just general good deeds. The speaker describes discernment as a simple yet powerful way to understand God's 'yes' through movements of the heart like peace, joy, and love.

💡Consolation

Consolation is a spiritual term used to describe feelings of peace, joy, love, and spiritual comfort that indicate alignment with God's will. In the video, the speaker suggests that consolation is a sign of God's approval or 'yes' when discerning decisions. Examples from the script include experiencing a deep peace or joy when contemplating a particular action, which signals that it is in accordance with God's will.

💡Holy Indifference

Holy indifference refers to a state of spiritual detachment where a person is not overly attached to any outcome except for fulfilling God's will. The speaker in the video explains that achieving holy indifference is essential before beginning the discernment process, as it allows one to be open to whatever God desires, whether it aligns with personal preferences or not. The concept emphasizes the importance of being free from personal biases and attachments.

💡Desolation

Desolation is a spiritual state characterized by feelings of discouragement, spiritual dryness, and lack of peace, often considered a sign of moving away from God's will. In the video, the speaker advises against making decisions during times of desolation, as these periods can cloud judgment and lead to choices not aligned with God's desires. The speaker contrasts desolation with consolation, highlighting the importance of recognizing these states in the discernment process.

💡Spiritual Movements

Spiritual movements refer to the inner emotional and spiritual experiences that indicate God's guidance, such as feelings of peace, joy, or unease. In the video, the speaker emphasizes the importance of paying attention to these movements of the heart during discernment, as they are often subtle indicators of God's will. The concept is central to the speaker's method of discernment, where listening to these movements helps clarify whether a decision aligns with God's will.

💡Prayer

Prayer is the practice of communicating with God, which in the context of the video, is essential for discernment and spiritual growth. The speaker highlights the necessity of daily prayer, recommending at least half an hour each day to foster a deep connection with God. Prayer is portrayed as the foundation for understanding God's will and ensuring that one's actions are aligned with divine guidance.

💡Vocation

Vocation in the video refers to a person's calling or purpose in life as determined by God. It is one of the significant life decisions that require careful discernment, as it shapes a person's direction and actions. The speaker mentions discerning one's vocation as an example of a 'biggie' that demands prayerful consideration and a deep understanding of God's will.

💡Saint Ignatius

Saint Ignatius is referenced as a key figure whose principles of discernment are foundational to the video's message. The speaker mentions Saint Ignatius's teachings on distinguishing between spiritual desolation and consolation as a guide for knowing when to make decisions. Saint Ignatius's influence is evident in the speaker's emphasis on moving from 'good to better' and the structured approach to discernment.

💡God's Will

God's will is the central theme of the video, representing what God desires for an individual in any given situation. The entire process of discernment, as described by the speaker, is aimed at understanding and aligning with God's will. The video portrays God's will as something that can be discerned through prayer, spiritual movements, and seeking consolation, ensuring that one's actions are not just good but specifically what God wants.

💡Thanksgiving and Faith

Thanksgiving and faith are practices the speaker recommends as part of the discernment process. Thanksgiving involves expressing gratitude to God for past guidance and discernment successes, which helps build faith in God's willingness to reveal His will. Faith is emphasized as believing that God wants to make His will clear and that He can be trusted to guide the individual. These practices are seen as ways to open oneself up to hearing God's voice more clearly.

Highlights

The most necessary thing to send your spiritual life into overdrive is discernment.

Discernment is not just about choosing between good and bad, but finding out what God specifically wants you to do.

The importance of praying for at least half an hour every day to ensure you are moving in the right direction spiritually.

If you are in desolation, it’s not the right time to discern; wait until you are in consolation.

Discernment should be about significant decisions that will impact your life and schedule on a long-term basis.

Holy indifference means being unattached to anything except God’s will, allowing you to discern more clearly.

The preparatory step for discernment includes prayer, making acts of thanksgiving, and building faith.

The enemy will resist your efforts to discern, so it's crucial to start with thanksgiving and faith to counter discouragement.

When discerning, ask Jesus to make His will clear through movements of the heart, such as feelings of peace, joy, or love.

If you receive a clear 'yes' during discernment, act on it immediately and don’t second-guess the decision.

If you get a 'no' during discernment, it’s important to accept it and not be swayed by external pressures.

Return to the grace of the discernment frequently to stay aligned with God’s will, especially when preparing for tasks.

Discernment is a powerful tool that can significantly reduce stress and increase joy by aligning your actions with God’s will.

The speaker emphasizes the importance of surrendering your entire life to God to live a peaceful and fulfilling life.

Clear discernment leads to experiencing God's presence and grace more fully, benefiting both you and those around you.

Transcripts

bingo

[Music]

so let's say you are you are really

following god and you're really on fire

you're loving prayer you're loving you

know the sacraments and getting a lot

out of it what would i say is the one

thing most

necessary to really send you into

overdrive like to be really really

future like i'm loving this

what can i do to really you know up my

game so there is something i would say

and that thing is drumroll

discernment i know you all were like

discerning about that and you already

knew that i'm sure discernment means to

try and figure out what a good course of

action is what something i need to do

something it's making it a decision

really but it's usually used in kind of

christian circles to mean a prayerful

mulling over and deciding what to do to

know not just what the good thing is

because loads of things are good guys

loads things are good what is the god

thing the one thing he wants you to do

ah great news for you it's super simple

okay you're thinking

i have to not eat for 40 days and then i

have to climb a mountain it was really

really simple and i'm going to tell you

what that is in a moment when i look at

my notes couple of disclaimers or

preparatory comments first up you might

find it very very helpful to check out

my other video on uh discernment of

spirits because in that i talk about

saint ignatius and the principles he

lays down to help us know when we're in

what's called desolation when we're in

constellation

yeah you got to be praying okay yes just

living a serious uh christian life and

just a thing on that you know you have

to be moving towards god saint ignatius

says moving from from good to better he

describes the other one as moving from

bad to worse okay so if you're moving

bad towards like every day you kind of

go slipping a bit further and you're

kind of letting that happen you're

choosing it so that's the bad one but

the good one is you're going from good

to better meaning you're trying every

day to grow i want to grow my love of

god okay i'm i'm still struggling we

might be even struggling with with

mortal sin but you're you're sincerely

sorry you you are since you're making

firm purposes of amendment when you

confess that means that you're like i i

really don't want to do this again and

i'm committing my my

all my weak pathetic resources to

changing that

bingo you are heading in the right

direction so don't stress it even if you

still fall into sin from time to time

all right so you have to be praying guys

otherwise you're wasting your time gotta

be praying at least half an hour every

day and then you want to check you're

not in desolation check the other talk

out for that but if you're in desolation

don't be discerning so here we are super

simple what do you do to discern god's

will what do you do what i do i ask

jesus to make it super simple for me i

feel like jesus you know how terrible i

am at discerning this stuff could you

please make it simple and just if you

want me to do something just make it

clear with uh with consolation with like

love joy peace or some other form of

consolation basically what it is is

learning what god's yes is i'm not sure

if i should do this thing i'm not sure

if this is my vocation if you know what

god's yes is and you can just say to him

do you want me to do this thing and then

you wait and listen and if you get a yes

bingo right it's pretty simple if the

yes is just consolation it's like love

joy peace patience all that sort of

stuff the no is just it's not desolation

but it would just be

a kind of flat it's kind of just normal

you i don't feel god's presence i don't

feel any movement of the heart there's

yeah nothing going on so just some

really simple steps then of how to do

this so you want to get obviously get

yourself a list so whenever there's

something that you really need to

discern guys don't be putting like what

toothpaste to buy on there don't be

getting all into the tiny minutia what

cake should i eat where should i go on

holidays you know just decide where to

go on your holidays yourself this is for

stuff that you're feeling like i really

feel i should get involved in this

ministry i'm gonna you know commit my

tuesday nights to go to this prayer

meeting stuff like that that's actually

going to impact your life your schedule

on a long term basis like what my

vocation is that's a biggie and maybe i

can go into more detail in that one and

a future future talk but this is the

kind of stuff the big to medium-sized

stuff in your life so i get a list i

have a list in my pocket then the next

thing is i need to get some holy

indifference now indifference we can

sometimes think about like i don't care

whatever whatever that is not

what saint ignatius would say about holy

indifference it means a lack of

unhelpful attachment okay so i want to

be attached to jesus i want to be

attached to his kingdom to his will

to the things that draw me towards him

but mostly i just want to be attached to

him if someone asked me to go to such

and such a place and preach a retreat if

i really really want to do this thing

for its sake rather than for god's sake

because god wants it then i'm attached

to that i i don't have holy indifference

i have an unholy attachment and maybe

i'm one i can't wait because there's

people there and they're going to think

i'm awesome and

maybe it's the opposite maybe i'm like

oh my gosh i could never do that

so this terrible aversion okay that's

that's also not holy indifference

because i totally don't want to do that

thing indifference between like no if if

you want me to do it jesus i want to do

it but if you don't want me to do it

then i don't want to do it so the only

thing i'm attached to is his will okay

so we want to get to that place and

that's before the discernment starts so

sometimes people get to this place of

holy and different like oh yes i'm

really peaceful now i could do it i

cannot do it and they think that's the

discernment they think that's a yes it's

not a yes that's just you being ready to

discern sometimes it's tricky to get to

holy indifference so i will do some

preparatory stuff i'll be in a time of

prayer i do this every day i no you

don't have to do this but this is me i

pray

for a discernment on one issue one

request every day and just take a maybe

five or ten minutes to do this um and i

have a list so then i will thank god i

kind of make acts of thanksgiving for

this gift of discernment i'll make acts

of faith to believe like i believe lord

that you do want me to know your will

that you do want me to know it easily

and clearly that this is possible that

you want to reveal that to me now stuff

like that i'll just build up my faith

and i'll praise god through that

like i said i'll thank him for other

times that he's made his will clear and

i'll kind of think of those i might look

on my list and go oh yeah that one and

that was so blessed and i thank him for

it and that again builds my faith and

opens me up to hear him more clearly i

also do that because the enemy old red

legs he does not want you doing this if

you get this guys you will be so

dangerous you'll stop being a mile wide

and an inch deep you start being

an inch wide and a mile deep meaning you

will be focused like a laser god's laser

of the kingdom to do just what he wants

we're wasting our energy we're wasting

the church's resources and energy doing

like stuff let's go this is not what god

wants so it's totally missing the mark

even if it's not evil

we shouldn't be doing it so this stuff

is is absolutely crucial so the enemy

he's gonna resist you he's gonna it's

gonna be hard you're gonna be you're

gonna get discouraged sometimes he's

gonna really try and hit you with

discouragement so that's why i really

plug in this you know thanksgiving and

faith right at the start super super

important then what i'm doing is i'm

checking for that attachment you know

the fear or the aversion all that sort

of thing so what i often say is lord if

you want me to do this i want to do it

and i'll check my heart how am i feeling

am i afraid am i overly attached would i

be okay if i didn't i'm just making note

of how i'm feeling then i'll do the

opposite if you don't want me to do it i

don't want to do it god and again i'll

check my reaction how free am i to just

go after god's will and i'll go back and

forth a little bit and if i feel i'm not

free then i'll i'll ask god god

please give me this holy indifference if

i'm afraid of what

what it might how it might go i'm afraid

of doing the thing again i'll surrender

that to god and maybe make some acts of

faith and surrender that sort of thing

so i just

spent some time there to really get my

heart free a little psalm that's very

helpful to me psalm 119 147 i hope in

your word for me that means i can't wait

till you speak clearly to me about this

request i hope in your word i really i

can't wait for it and i know it's coming

then after i've done that i feel in a

place of peace and calm i feel yeah i'm

i could do this or not do this i'm chill

i'm indifferent then i ask him i say

jesus if you want me to do this please

make that really clear to me now really

simply and clearly by giving me love joy

and peace or whatever consolation you

desire so i ask and then i listen what

am i listening for i'm not listening for

words i'm listening for movements of the

heart i'm observing my heart and just

seeing as i think about doing this thing

do i experience some form of consolation

and guys this is where it this may take

some time for you to get to know how he

speaks to you through movements of the

heart through consolation is it a peace

sometimes i've experienced a piece that

is it almost feels like it's feeding

your soul feeding my soul it's so

thick and rich and beautiful or a joy

that is is again it's just beautiful

it's like this joy mixed with peace and

it just rises up in in the heart or love

i just feel this

experience of like love of our lord or

of of souls coming up

stuff like that so it's it's clear it's

not what normally happens as i'm walking

about my day and doing my jobs and it's

it's unusual so you will know what

consolation looks like in your life and

this is this so this is why this stuff

might take a bit of time for you to get

used to that sort of thing so just sit

there be patient make some notes in your

journal listen ask him again if you find

yourself i'm not oh i feel some fear

coming up about this i feel doubt that

god could really make this clear i'd

feel doubt that i could really hear him

i go back to the the preparatory stuff

of really making those acts of faith no

i really believe that you want to make

it clear what your will is for me if it

comes to the end of my you know five or

ten minutes that i've given towards this

and i'm i'm still not clear or i'm still

not quite indifferent then i sometimes

will just hit pause and come back to it

the next day which is fine but once i

get the word that means i'm asking him

jesus do you want me to do this thing

and i feel like great peace i feel joy i

feel it feels almost like his joy about

the thought of me doing this his love

his peace his

his

anointing his enthusiasm just sort of it

comes to my heart and i and it also is

is very much the way i have been used to

experiencing his consolation

then i know it's a yes very simply and i

take out my pen and i do a little dick

beside the request on my on my list and

i cross it out and my discernment is

over at that point now this is a very

very simple way to do this guys so there

might be some others who have a much

more complicated way this

works amazingly for me and it's very

simple now as i said i don't go back to

discern that again if in a future day

i'm like oh and i get another request on

the same day

like oh maybe oh because i really

no i made this discernment and it was a

yes for this event and that's what i'm

doing and i'm just like jesus like

everything else is this is what the

father is asking me to do so just in

faith i'm just gonna trust that he has

got that's his will he's gonna provide

he's gonna do everything and i've had

the most extraordinary experiences of

him like providing the talk so

powerfully for whatever event i had to

go to like it would just come to me

almost there as i sit discerning and i

discern it i get this beautiful strong

yes in my heart this enthusiasm this joy

this peace and the talk just comes it

flows right out of the grace of that

consolation and then the event

numerous times has happened it's been so

so blessed because this wasn't my

decision this wasn't just me randomly

trying to guess god's will this was him

clearly saying to me and me clearly

responding and then me staying committed

to that so after i've listened and i got

a clear yes i act and i don't question

it i go for it very important otherwise

you give a chance for the enemy to get

in there and so confusion and it gets so

messy and also if i get a clear no i i

pray about it i listen and it's like no

every time i've discerned this there's

just been no movement in the heart at

all then i know it's a no it doesn't

matter who asked me to do it yeah i

won't be able to do that one yeah i'm

not going to be able to go to africa

with you this this summer

[Music]

and sometimes that might be difficult

can be difficult for me to say no to

people but it's really really important

if there's no point in us discerning if

we're not able to say no we're just

wasting our time so really ask god for

the grace to do that and do it freely

and joyfully and as an act of worship of

him the other thing that i will do is i

will return to the grace of the

discernment so if i'm still preparing

for an event for a talk for whatever i

will remember

that request remember the grace of it

and i'll just yeah let my heart enter

back into that place of discernment and

this is amazing i will experience the

same consolation it'll come up right

away peace a sense of god's presence is

very frequently for me i have the sense

of god's presence almost like a warmth

around me and this beautiful piece it

really helps me prepare for whatever

that that event is and it's also if i

get confused or discouraged you know i'm

saying oh maybe i got this wrong i will

say no i discerned right and i'll go

back to that grace i'll remember what it

was like

to get that grace and i will experience

it again that's again something saint

ignatius says return to the grace that

you experienced in prayer frequently

guys this is a game changer it has been

a game changer for me it has massively

reduced my stress and hugely increased

my joy in the lord my ability to be

aware of how constantly he is present in

my life and speaking to me through these

movements of the heart how much he

really

he really wants me to live a beautiful

peaceful joyful fulfilling life and he

wants that for you too but we have to

surrender all of our life to him this is

one of the most beautiful ways i've ever

found to do that and not just running

around doing my own thing or doing what

i think maybe he wants me to do is doing

what i know he wants me to do and i'm

experiencing the grace of it lots of

people i'm seeing him around me are

experiencing that too so i hope this has

been helpful god bless you

you