Handsome Men’s Game | Why Women Will Sleep With You But Not Want A Relationship With You

JostenJ
14 Aug 202317:48

Summary

TLDRIn this video, Joston J addresses the common dilemma faced by attractive men: why women may enjoy their company and even 'adore' them but are hesitant to commit to a relationship. He explains that good looks can get a man's foot in the door, but it's his actions and behavior that determine if a woman sees him as more than just a casual encounter. Joston emphasizes the importance of not seeking validation through women and advises men to understand that women, too, enjoy sex and are not always looking for an emotional attachment. He encourages viewers to be confident, date multiple women, and not to be overly invested in any single relationship outcome.

Takeaways

  • 😎 Confidence is key: The speaker emphasizes the importance of self-confidence and not seeking validation from women.
  • 👥 Looks aren't everything: Good looks can get you noticed, but they don't guarantee a relationship; it's the actions and behaviors that matter.
  • 💡 Don't be a one-trick pony: Being attractive should not be the only attribute; diversifying your skills and interests can make you more appealing.
  • 🚫 Avoid seeking approval: The speaker warns against letting a woman's approval define your self-worth or actions.
  • 🤔 Understand women's perspectives: Women may be attracted to good looks but are often looking for more in a relationship, such as security and emotional connection.
  • 🔄 Embrace change and rotation: Attractive men should expect women to come and go, and be comfortable with the idea of dating multiple people.
  • 🚫 No need for emotional attachment: The speaker suggests that men should not get emotionally attached after sex and should understand that it can be just a physical thing for some women.
  • 🛡 Be emotionally resilient: Learn to handle rejection and not let it affect your self-esteem or behavior towards other women.
  • 🤝 Actions speak louder than words: Women will judge you by your actions and behaviors, not just by your looks or what you say.
  • 🚀 Pursue personal growth: Instead of relying on looks, focus on personal development to become a more well-rounded and attractive partner.
  • 🌟 Be the prize: The speaker encourages men to be the kind of person women would not want to risk losing, by being confident, decisive, and self-assured.

Q & A

  • What is the main topic discussed in the video script?

    -The main topic discussed in the video script is the misconception that good-looking men face regarding relationships and the reasons why they might struggle to form lasting romantic connections despite their physical attractiveness.

  • Why does the speaker suggest that good-looking men might get insecure?

    -The speaker suggests that good-looking men might get insecure because they may feel that despite their looks, they are unable to maintain a relationship, which can lead to confusion and a sense of inadequacy.

  • What does the speaker mean by 'monetize your looks'?

    -By 'monetize your looks,' the speaker is suggesting that if one is good-looking, they should be able to capitalize on their appearance, for example, by becoming an influencer, model, or actor, rather than just relying on looks to get by.

  • Why does the speaker say that looks can only get you so far in a relationship?

    -The speaker argues that while looks can initially attract someone, they are not enough to sustain a relationship. Actions, behaviors, and the ability to provide more than just physical attraction are what truly matter in forming a deeper connection.

  • What does the speaker mean by 'Diva energy'?

    -'Diva energy' in this context refers to the self-assuredness and confidence that comes with being attractive and knowing it. The speaker uses the term to highlight the initial impression one might make based on looks alone.

  • What advice does the speaker give to men who feel used after providing physical intimacy?

    -The speaker advises men not to get emotionally attached and to understand that women, like men, can also enjoy sex without wanting a relationship. He encourages them to not overthink the situation and to not seek validation from women.

  • Why does the speaker say that a woman might not want to pursue a relationship with a good-looking man?

    -The speaker suggests that a woman might not want to pursue a relationship with a good-looking man because she might feel intimidated, think he has other options, or fear getting hurt, especially if he does not provide emotional or other forms of support beyond sex.

  • What does the speaker mean by 'you need to be looking for a woman to show you things'?

    -The speaker is advising that men should seek women who show genuine interest and investment in the relationship, such as through actions like buying gifts, showing care, and making an effort to be part of their lives beyond just physical intimacy.

  • What is the speaker's view on the idea of 'rotation' among attractive men?

    -The speaker believes that attractive men should be prepared for a 'rotation' of women in their lives, meaning they should not be surprised or upset when women come and go. He suggests that this is a natural part of dating when one is attractive and should not be overly emotionally invested.

  • How does the speaker address the issue of men feeling rejected when a woman ends a casual sexual relationship?

    -The speaker advises men not to take it personally and to understand that women, like men, have the right to end a relationship when it no longer serves them. He encourages men to not let emotions cloud their judgment and to maintain their self-worth.

  • What is the speaker's final advice to men regarding relationships and dating?

    -The speaker's final advice is for men to stay confident, not to be overly dependent on the outcome of any one relationship, and to enjoy the process of dating multiple women to understand what they truly want in a partner.

Outlines

00:00

😎 The Dilemma of Good Looks and Relationships

Joston J addresses the issue of attractive men feeling insecure despite their looks. He discusses a subscriber's concern about being good-looking and good in bed but still getting rejected after a few dates. The video emphasizes the importance of language and behavior, suggesting that looks can get a man's foot in the door but true value comes from what he offers beyond physical attraction. Joston advises men to monetize their looks or talents and not rely solely on appearance. He also touches on the idea that women may use attractive men for sex but not for a deeper relationship unless there are additional benefits.

05:02

🤔 The Misconception of Attractiveness and Emotional Attachment

This paragraph delves into the preconceived notions that attractive men have about their relationships with women. Joston J explains that looks are just a bonus and that it's a man's actions and behaviors that truly matter in a relationship. He warns against seeking validation from women and suggests that attractive men need to understand that women, like men, enjoy sex and are not necessarily looking for an emotional attachment. The speaker encourages men to not overthink situations where they've had sex with a woman who then distances herself, framing it as a normal part of being attractive and having multiple options.

10:03

🚶‍♂️ Dealing with Rejection and the Rotation of Women

Joston J talks about how attractive men should handle rejection and the concept of 'rotation' in dating. He emphasizes that rejection is a part of life and that men should not take it personally. The speaker advises against being overly emotional or attached to one woman, suggesting that men should be prepared for women to come and go in their lives. He also discusses the idea of 'monkey branching' and 'hypergamy,' where women look for the best deal in a partner, and encourages men to be confident and decisive to avoid being eliminated from a woman's life.

15:05

💬 The Importance of Confidence and Non-Attachment in Dating

In the final paragraph, Joston J stresses the importance of confidence and not being overly attached to the idea of a relationship. He advises men to date multiple women to understand what they like and dislike, and not to be dependent on the outcome with any one woman. The speaker suggests that men should make women earn their time and not always try to fix problems or arguments. He concludes by reminding men that having sex without emotional attachment is fine and that they should not let their emotions dictate their actions in dating.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Attraction

Attraction refers to the feeling of being drawn towards someone or something, often based on physical appearance or personal qualities. In the context of the video, attraction is a key factor in the initial stages of dating, where good looks can get a person's foot in the door. The script mentions that good-looking individuals can attract good-looking partners, but this alone does not guarantee a deeper relationship.

💡Validation

Validation is the confirmation or approval of the truth, value, or significance of something. In the video, the speaker discusses how some individuals seek validation from others, particularly in romantic relationships. The script uses the term 'adored' to illustrate the desire for validation, where the speaker questions why someone would feel a need for such validation beyond the physical aspect of a relationship.

💡Monetize

To monetize means to convert non-monetary assets or resources into money. Within the video, the concept of monetizing one's looks is brought up, suggesting that if one is attractive, they should be able to capitalize on it, perhaps through modeling, acting, or becoming an influencer. The speaker challenges the idea that good looks alone should suffice in life.

💡Relationship

A relationship refers to the way in which two or more entities are connected. The video discusses the complexities of romantic relationships, emphasizing that physical attraction is not the sole basis for a lasting partnership. The speaker argues that beyond sex, one must offer other benefits to form a meaningful relationship.

💡Emotion

Emotion refers to a natural instinctive state of mind that influences a person's thoughts, feelings, and actions. The script talks about the emotional attachment that can occur in relationships and how men need to understand that women, like men, can have sex without becoming emotionally attached. It also warns against letting emotions cloud one's judgment in dating scenarios.

💡Intimidation

Intimidation is the act of making someone feel less confident by being more powerful or impressive. In the video, the speaker mentions that an attractive man might intimidate a woman, causing her to feel that she might get hurt or that he is out of her reach, which could lead her to avoid pursuing a deeper relationship.

💡Benefits

Benefits, in this context, refer to the positive aspects or advantages that one party can offer another in a relationship. The speaker in the video emphasizes that to maintain a relationship beyond the physical level, one must provide benefits beyond sex, such as emotional support, companionship, or material security.

💡Rotation

In the context of the video, 'rotation' refers to the idea of dating or being involved with multiple people at the same time, cycling through them as one sees fit. The speaker advises that attractive men should be comfortable with the concept of having a rotation and not becoming overly attached to one person.

💡Ghosting

Ghosting is the act of suddenly cutting off all communication with someone without any explanation, typically in a social or romantic context. The video mentions ghosting as a way some people end relationships or stop dating someone without confrontation, leaving the other person confused and without closure.

💡Self-Elimination

Self-elimination in the video refers to the act of removing oneself from a situation or relationship that is not beneficial or desired. The speaker encourages men to be comfortable with self-elimination, suggesting that it is a sign of strength and self-awareness to leave a situation that does not serve one's best interests.

💡Confidence

Confidence is a feeling or belief in one's abilities and judgments. The video script talks about the importance of being confident in dating and relationships, suggesting that a lack of confidence can be a red flag to potential partners. The speaker implies that confidence can help one navigate the complexities of dating more effectively.

Highlights

The video discusses the misconception that good looks guarantee a relationship.

Language use can reveal a lot about a person and may influence how they are perceived by others.

Physical attractiveness can get someone's attention but is not enough for a lasting relationship.

Good-looking men may struggle with insecurity due to the pressure of maintaining their image.

The speaker emphasizes the importance of not relying solely on looks for validation.

Being attractive can sometimes lead to being used for superficial reasons rather than genuine connection.

The video talks about the idea that women can be just as interested in sex as men.

Men are encouraged to understand that women also enjoy sex and are not always seeking emotional attachment.

The speaker suggests that good-looking men should not expect special treatment or a relationship based on their appearance alone.

It's important for attractive men to realize they may intimidate potential partners due to perceived unavailability.

The video highlights the need for men to offer more than just physical attraction to build a meaningful relationship.

Attractive men should be aware that they may be perceived as having many options, which can affect how women approach them.

The speaker advises against seeking validation from women and instead focusing on self-confidence.

Men are encouraged to build a 'rotation' of women, implying they should not be overly attached to one person.

The video discusses the idea that women may 'ghost' men after using them for sex, without offering an explanation.

The speaker emphasizes that men should not let emotions affect their interactions with women and should maintain control.

The video concludes with advice for men to stay confident and not to be overly concerned with the opinions of others.

Transcripts

play00:00

what's good guys it's your boy joston J

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coming to another video Let's cook boys

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let's cook all right handsome men's game

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all right and why women will want to

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sleep with you but they will not want a

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relationship with you and um listen

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I had a subscriber asked me to do this

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video and he goes

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this is the reason why good looking guys

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get insecure I [ __ ] her so good and

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she adored me but after the third date

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she was like sorry I can't tonight and I

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never heard from her again it's crazy

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because you be like how I [ __ ] her so

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good I'm so good looking

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but I'm so good looking I think he means

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hope you can make a video about this

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all right what's up with the word adore

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um remember what I told you

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if it sounds like it's gonna come out of

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a woman's mouth do not talk like that

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because your language exposes you that's

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number one number two

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your looks I mean you know for the most

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part a woman can Shine off of you she

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can take you out in public parade you

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around I guess and you know she can

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benefit that way but they really don't

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benefit a woman that way it's just bait

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you know let's just get into the video

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because a lot of men are going to be

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confused about this and

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it is your fault but you know it's

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because you guys you listen to the wrong

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advice right when you're a good looking

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dude you're going to attract a good

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looking woman so that's where the line

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draws like there okay now there comes

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getting to know her which all of you

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dudes continue to say you know I just

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want to get to know her and all of this

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blah blah blah blah blah blah blah so if

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you're trying to get to know her what is

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your good looks have to do with anything

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they get your foot in the door

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this is like that Diva energy you know

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that uh just that you know I'm so good

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looking all right if you're so good

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looking why can you not monetize your

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looks why can't you do that

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why why can't you be an influencer why

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can't you be a model a male model why

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can't you be an actor why can't you do

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any of that why are you just this

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regular dude who's depending on his

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looks to get by listen a woman is going

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to use you for what she can use you for

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and if you don't benefit her Beyond sex

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you're never going to get a relationship

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because look

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in there

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why are you feeling some type of way or

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thinking and overthinking about this

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chick you got what you wanted you know

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you I I took from there you know she has

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sex with you more than once

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so what's the problem here it's because

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you wanted that validation

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you wanted that relationship

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you wanted a boyfriend girlfriend type

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of situation but why

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you know really think about that why

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because a woman makes you feel good

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about yourself but if you're this good

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looking guy

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I mean

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shouldn't you be able to get with

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multiple women so why you know women can

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have sex and not get emotionally

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attached men need to start understanding

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this

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women like sex just as much as we do all

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right and you know I know because they

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have sex with a bunch of guys and guys

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are out here and they can't have sex

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with a bunch of women does that make

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sense

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no emotions can go into this you let the

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woman get emotional you let her show you

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why she should be in this situation I

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keep saying it over and over again all

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right so if you can't benefit a woman

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Beyond sex she will use you for sex

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then there will come another guy who you

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know he gets the job done in the bedroom

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but he comes with protection

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provisioning uh he'll parade her around

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his family she'll get to really know

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that side of him and stuff like that

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he wants a family too okay that is a

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good candidate for a boyfriend your good

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looks they don't put you in that they

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don't put you in that category of

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boyfriend all right when a woman meets

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you you're very charismatic you look

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good you throw together an outfit really

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well she sees that other chicks are on

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your body like they you know how to talk

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to chicks she's like all right he's a

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[ __ ] boy

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that's how they think okay I can get

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hurt here all right I really want to

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[ __ ] this guy but I'm not trying to take

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it anything further than there because I

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will get hurt that will hurt a woman's

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ego it's the whole thing how I said a

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woman gets intimidated by you as a

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attractive handsome and select man

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because

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you're just too far and in between out

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there you know women only have options

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of the same guy they see over and over

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and over again but some you know have

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better ways for them to benefit than

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others

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look outside

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you've never seen a chick who you

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consider very attractive with some

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average looking dude to you you see that

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all the time and you know why because

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they know that they're safe there

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women even get with guys who can't bust

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a grape in a fruit fight that always you

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know gets me too like what the [ __ ]

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don't you want somebody to really

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protect you wake up out of bed three in

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the morning be ready to kill some [ __ ]

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for the family no

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they get with guys that'll clutch on

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them like oh my God babe what do we do

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we call the cops because that guy comes

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with a lot of benefits you know more

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than that to them

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so just always remember that when you're

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an attractive guy they have this

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preconceived notion about you they think

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that they will get hurt by messing with

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you they think that you have other

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things going on you will not make them

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the focus you ever wonder why you could

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be a very attractive dude and you get to

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talking to a girl you know you might

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take her out you might not you might

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just hang out and then you start pushing

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boyfriend energy up your looks don't

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matter anymore you're the same as all

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the other guys

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because she knows that all right he

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looks this way

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I had this preconceived notion in my

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head of how he should be how he should

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treat me and deal with me oh man now

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he's just like them so the looks don't

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mean anything you see what I mean how

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your looks cannot benefit her your looks

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are just a bonus your actions and

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behaviors is what makes her go this is

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the guy

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and then in there so a woman could use

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you as a sneaky link and then your looks

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are a bonus because like this good

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looking dude you know I want to use this

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dude for sex

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while I go back to my boyfriend or you

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know the beta males that will do

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whatever I want them to do most of the

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time women have dudes in line

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they'll deal with one dude you know keep

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dealing with him stop dealing with him

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to get with the next dude but in between

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there they're still keeping guys strung

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along for attention women have sex with

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dudes sometimes they get emotionally

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attached sometimes they don't so I want

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dudes to wake up understand that

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you need to be looking for a woman to

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show you things see this dude the

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commenter

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was just pretty much going off of you

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know I took her on a date you know now

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she doesn't want to hang out anymore but

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what was she proving to you because when

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a woman invests in the situation She's

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Not Gonna Leave see you were just good

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enough with her giving you sex

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and then you're giving her sex in return

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it's like a handshake once it's done

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it's done I give this person a handshake

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does that person owe me anything now

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do I owe that person something now no

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it's done

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there was too much emotions in this

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situation and like I said the language

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is going to expose it oh well she adored

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me

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for it that's kind of you know signaling

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off to me that you look for validation

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through women and if a woman doesn't

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want to mess with you like that it makes

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you feel some sort of way like well I

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don't understand why does she want to

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stick around dude

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you hit more than one time okay two

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three whatever how many times

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that should be good enough for you you

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should be dealing with so many other

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chicks that adore you that that's just

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normal treatment that you get from

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chicks right

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don't focus on chicks that you know

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eliminate themselves that's what's gonna

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come with being an attractive guy listen

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being an attractive man you have to get

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used to women coming in and leaving and

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you're rotating see a lot of dudes want

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to build a rotation but they don't

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understand that that comes with you know

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giving women some sort of attention

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keeping them involved this mentality

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has to be unbreakable to deal with

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multiple women

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because if not your actions and

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behaviors are going to become you know

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tainted and you're gonna start rubbing

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off on the next chick like well this

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trick did this so now I have to act mean

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towards this one you know or now I have

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to you know double down on how I act

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with this one no you treat them all the

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same women are going to fall off the

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face of the planet because women have an

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abundance of options

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so she could be dealing with you she

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could be having sex with you and then

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you're not understanding that this is

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just sexual

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now another dude comes in he can blow

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her back out just as good as you but he

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comes with more benefits now it's time

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to go because women are not always going

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to be straight up with you and tell you

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she even said here right

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she was like sorry I can't tonight and I

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never heard from her again okay so you

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know and then she ghosted you so she

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wasn't straight up like listen I'm not

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feeling it anymore I got somebody else

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women are not going to do that

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they're going to ghost they're going to

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eliminate themselves so either way if

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she eliminates herself because you're

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intimidating or she eliminates herself

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because she's got a better option she

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still eliminates herself

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don't get all in your feelings because

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you have to eliminate yourself see this

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is the thing this is why dudes will get

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in their feelings when you get rejected

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you're in your feelings because nine

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times out of ten you're not a guy that's

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used to rejecting a bunch of chicks

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you're gonna get in your feeling when a

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chick eliminates herself because nine

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times out of ten you're not used to

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eliminating yourself from a chick's life

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on a consistent basis so that means

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whenever a chick gets out of line

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back talks you doesn't want to follow

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your program you don't execute no

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contact you don't just eliminate

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yourself from the situation because if

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you were used to that then you would

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understand how it feels on the other

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side like you would understand why she's

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doing it to you because you do it to a

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bunch of chicks as well same thing with

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the body count you know most dudes who

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have a problem with it

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they really don't even knock down chicks

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like that I'm telling you because guys

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who do knock down a lot of chicks

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understand that chicks have to have a

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lot of sex in order for me to knock them

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down

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it's simple psychology

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and a lot of this stuff is ego driven

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ego based see that's some Diva energy oh

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well I look so good and I I put it on

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her I swear I did I mean what was she

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doing to show you that you put it on her

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like that was she buying you things was

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she coming to your house cooking

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cleaning was she calling you at all

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times like oh I just want to make sure

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you were good do you need anything no

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she was showing up on dates and she was

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smashing I know everything it's like

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when I jump on these one-on-one calls

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I'll let somebody talk for like three

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minutes maybe the first two minutes and

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then I just take over and then but I'll

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be done in like 60 seconds and then like

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wow

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how'd you know all of that because it's

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the same song and dance over and over

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and over again now remember what I said

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a woman sees the same guy over and over

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and over and deals with the same guy

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over and over and over so it's going to

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be the same way like this too

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how I tell dudes when we're on

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one-on-one calls or even just dudes out

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in the world

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you know you're not sure of yourself

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you're very indecisive and wishy-washy

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and all over the place and if I can tell

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this don't you think a woman can tell

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this

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I'm just a masculine dude and I can tell

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so you don't think that the average

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chick can tell that you're not confident

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you're all over the place

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you're wishy-washy

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indecisive you really think a woman

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can't tell from dealing with dudes you

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know starting at the age of 15

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14 13 all the way up past college into

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her adult life she's dealing with dudes

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who approach her dealing with dudes

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sexually dealing with dudes offering her

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things advancing at her you really think

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that a woman can't differentiate who's

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the guy

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as opposed to who's not the guy

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you need to start checking your actions

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and behaviors because that's gonna be a

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lot of the times why women eliminate

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themselves

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because if you're this dope ass dude a

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woman is not willing to risk losing you

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to deal with someone else I don't even

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care if that person can benefit her more

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but that's going to be like in

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relationship uh terms and I can see it

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coming now cause virtual are true

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hypergamy and monkey branching and women

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are always looking for the bigger better

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deal shiny object syndrome and all this

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other goofy stuff no

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no

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because even the chick I'm messing with

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right now I'm pretty sure you know a guy

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could offer her more but she already

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knows that you know she's got a safe

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space here

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non-judgment Zone

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elevation Zone

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[Music]

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that's what a woman really wants not

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just sex

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start thinking with your head

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and material things and all that stuff

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yeah those things are nice but when you

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bump into a woman with good qualities

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she's going to stick around and not for

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sex not for materialistic things

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all right so when you're in your mind

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thinking very sexual

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you're always going to think that women

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don't like sex like that so when these

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things happen you're like well how is

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that

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how is that I thought she would pair

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bond to me and I thought all this blah

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blah blah blah blah

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stop watching these toxic videos they're

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corrupting your brain women are women

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they've always been women okay

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if a woman doesn't want to be on your

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program that's perfectly fine guys

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if she wants to be on your program

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that's also perfectly fine

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you have to be able to maneuver and move

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around these situations but never ever

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ever get in your emotions about it

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because you're just like them

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and what do I tell you you want to be

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him

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because if you move like him then you

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are him and they are them and she knows

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that

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stop getting your emotions women like to

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have sex they will use you sometimes for

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sex as you should be using them for sex

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you let a woman pursue a relationship as

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opposed to you pursuing a relationship

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when a woman really likes you like that

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she will start to ask you hey so we've

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been talking for about you know six

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months eight months a year now and um

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what are we some women will even try to

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bring the fire to you like you know I'm

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not going to keep coming over if you're

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not going to take me out and start

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treating me like this and actually ask

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me out you know they do that you never

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have to be the one like damn babe I want

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to be with you and I want you to have my

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baby and all of this stuff because men

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talk like that you know that women get

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pregnant a lot of the times because a

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man wanted the baby and he was begging

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it's not always just a woman trying to

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trap a man or you know I'm 30 years old

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and my clock is ticking now no women

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have babies young and it's always

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because a guy is chasing not always but

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a lot of the times because a man is just

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a male is chasing but damn I gotta keep

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this girl I gotta keep her I gotta lock

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her down having a child won't keep a

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woman

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you know rushing her into a relationship

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will not keep her

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so just remember

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if a woman wants to have sex with you

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and leave it at that and she's not

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pushing lovey-dovey energy fairy tale

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energy fairy tale uh Cinderella energy

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that's perfectly fine

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that's fine you just you know ride the

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wave man

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and just let it run its course and then

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eventually if she comes around for a

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relationship that's cool if she doesn't

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that's cool too so when you're out here

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date multiple women see what it is that

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you like and what you don't like and

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don't ever be outcome dependent or a

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chick that you see as relationship

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material because you don't even know if

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her on the other side is looking at you

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as boyfriend material so you're thinking

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she's girlfriend material but you don't

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even know where you really stand start

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making these chicks earn your time start

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making them work for you start saying

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things they don't like

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here's another tip stop what all it is

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what's wrong and I'm sorry and can I fix

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it no

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don't always fix the mess

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you can get a woman angry you can let

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her try to argue with you you can say

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something that she doesn't like you know

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why because that's just gonna expose how

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she really feels about you all right

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stop pushing this relationship energy if

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she's not coming forward with it first

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and if she hasn't earned her keep

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never push that uh that energy with a

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chick because all that's going to do is

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show her that you're not the god

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so if a chick is having sex with you and

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that's all it is that's perfectly fine

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because you're getting what you want

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all right and when sex happens

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a lot of the times emotions follow after

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so if you're having sex and you think

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that you're doing a good job and you're

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blowing her back out but nothing

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emotional is transitioning she's not

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pushing energy forward trying to you

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know latch on to you

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that's just not the girl for you she's

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not that interested in a relationship

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it's just sex only that's okay don't get

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in your head get out there and stay

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handsome my boys it's your boy Justin J

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get with you boys in the next video like

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comment subscribe let's go boys let's go

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Related Tags
Attraction DynamicsRelationship AdviceMale PerspectiveDating StrategiesEmotional IntelligenceSelf-ImprovementSocial DynamicsGender RolesIntimacy IssuesConfidence Building