"Esposas tradicionais": por que papéis de gênero ultrapassados voltaram à moda?

Summary

The video discusses the trend of 'trad wives,' women choosing traditional gender roles where they stay home and care for the family. It explores the reasons behind this resurgence, including burnout from balancing work and caregiving responsibilities. Experts argue that true gender equality requires men to share in domestic duties. However, for most women, especially in Brazil, financial independence is a necessity, and only a privileged few can afford this lifestyle. The video also highlights how domestic workers enable affluent women to embrace such roles, while many men still avoid household responsibilities, emphasizing the need for broader social and political changes.

Takeaways

• 👰 'Trad wives' or 'traditional wives' are women who embrace ultra-traditional gender roles, choosing to stay at home and take care of the house and children.
• 💼 These women reject financial independence in favor of returning to a more traditional past where men are the sole providers.
• 🧠 Experts argue that this trend may be a response to the overwhelming burden of balancing work and household responsibilities that many modern women face.
• ⚖️ The incomplete gender revolution has led to women sharing financial responsibilities with men, but men are often not equally sharing domestic duties.
• 👩‍👧‍👦 Without equal care responsibilities between men and women, women remain the primary caregivers, leading to unsustainable pressure on them.
• 💔 As a result, there are increasing trends of women delaying marriage, avoiding motherhood, and rising divorce rates.
• 👨‍👩‍👦 In Brazil, most women do not have the luxury of choosing this 'trad wife' lifestyle, as many are still the sole financial and domestic caretakers.
• 💰 Only a small, privileged group of highly educated women, often married to wealthier men, can afford to embrace this lifestyle.
• 🧹 Many women in Brazil, especially those with fewer resources, are employed as domestic workers, caring for the homes and families of wealthier women.
• 👨‍👧‍👦 Although there are examples of 'new masculinities' where men embrace more equitable caregiving roles, this tends to be limited to more affluent and educated sectors of society.

Q & A

What are 'trad wives'?

'Trad wives' are women who choose to live a traditional life, embracing ultratraditional gender roles. They prioritize domestic life, staying at home to care for the household and children, while relying on their husbands for financial support.

Why are traditional gender roles becoming a trend again in 2024?

Experts suggest that the return to traditional gender roles is a reaction to the multiple work demands faced by women today. Many feel that combining financial responsibilities with household and caregiving duties has become unsustainable, leading some to seek simpler, more traditional roles.

What is meant by the 'unsustainable' advancement of women in the workforce?

The script argues that while women have made significant progress by joining the workforce and sharing financial responsibilities, the lack of equal distribution of domestic tasks between men and women makes this progress unsustainable. Women are often expected to handle both professional and domestic duties, creating excessive pressure.

What social impacts are mentioned as a result of the gender role revolution?

The script highlights several social impacts, including a decline in marriage rates, lower fertility rates, and rising divorce rates. These trends are seen as consequences of the pressures on women to balance both professional and domestic responsibilities.

What solution does Vera Iaconelli propose for achieving gender equality?

Vera Iaconelli suggests that true gender equality requires an equitable division of caregiving responsibilities between men and women. Without this, women remain primarily responsible for care work, which is undervalued and leaves them disadvantaged.

What are the potential downsides of the conservative gender model according to the script?

The conservative gender model, where women stay at home and rely on men for financial support, has historically led to female subjugation, violence, and a lack of autonomy. Women can only remain in this role as long as the man supports them, making them vulnerable if that support is withdrawn.

How is the reality of 'trad wives' different in Brazil compared to other countries?

In Brazil, the 'trad wives' lifestyle is mostly unattainable for the majority of women, as most households cannot rely on a single male breadwinner. Only a small, highly educated minority can afford to embrace this lifestyle, often marrying wealthier men.

How do domestic workers play a role in the 'trad wives' and 'trophy wife' dynamics?

Many wealthy Brazilian women who embrace the 'trad wives' or 'trophy wife' lifestyle rely on domestic workers, often poor and Black, to handle household tasks. This creates a system where privileged women can avoid both professional and domestic labor by outsourcing it.

What is the new 'trophy wife' trend mentioned in the script?

The 'trophy wife' trend, often seen on social media, involves women who do not work but claim that 'not working' keeps them busy. These women often spend their time showcasing a luxurious, carefree lifestyle, supported by domestic workers and wealthy husbands.

Is there hope for more equal gender roles in the future?

Yes, the script mentions that a new type of masculinity is emerging, especially among more affluent and educated men, where they embrace caregiving roles and share domestic responsibilities. However, for the majority of the population, achieving true gender equality will require significant political will and societal change.

Outlines

00:00

👰‍♀️ The Rise of 'Trad Wives' in Modern Society

This paragraph introduces the concept of 'trad wives,' women who embrace traditional gender roles, often rejecting financial independence to focus on homemaking and child-rearing. It explores the reasons behind this trend in 2024, suggesting that it might be a response to the unsustainable pressure of balancing work and home responsibilities that many women face today. The social and personal consequences of this shift are discussed, including lower marriage rates, fewer women choosing to have children, and rising divorce rates, as women share the burden of financial responsibility without an equivalent sharing of domestic duties by men.

05:04

💡 The Solution to Gender Role Imbalance: Shared Domestic Responsibilities

This paragraph discusses the incomplete 'gender revolution' and highlights the need for an equitable distribution of caregiving duties between men and women. According to experts, the key to resolving the imbalance lies in men embracing domestic responsibilities. Without this, the burdens of caregiving and domestic work fall disproportionately on women, leading to negative outcomes such as reduced autonomy and vulnerability to male-dominated control. The paragraph also critiques the traditional conservative model of domesticity, noting its inherent flaws, particularly the subjugation of women.

🇧🇷 The Double Burden of Brazilian Women

Focusing on the Brazilian context, this paragraph describes how many women in Brazil juggle both professional and domestic responsibilities, often without adequate support from male partners. Even when men are physically present at home, they frequently avoid household duties, leaving women to manage everything on their own. The paragraph also addresses the reality that the 'trad wife' lifestyle, promoted by some online influencers, is largely unattainable for most Brazilian women due to financial constraints. The only women able to adopt this lifestyle are those from affluent backgrounds.

🏡 The Role of Domestic Workers in Maintaining Privilege

Here, the text shifts to the role of domestic workers in Brazil, highlighting how wealthy women outsource domestic tasks to poorer women, primarily Black women, who take on the burdens of housework and caregiving. This system allows privileged women to opt out of both the labor market and household chores while still promoting a 'traditional' domestic lifestyle. The paragraph critiques this arrangement as exploitative and underscores the unequal distribution of labor, particularly how poor women enable wealthy women to embrace a 'trophy wife' lifestyle.

🤝 The New Masculinity: Embracing Equality

This section highlights a growing movement towards 'new masculinity,' where some men are choosing to share caregiving responsibilities and pursue more egalitarian relationships. These men seek more equal partnerships and reject toxic masculinity and 'red pill' ideologies. However, the text points out that this progressive shift is mostly seen among the wealthy and well-educated. For most of the population, achieving true gender equality remains a political challenge requiring structural change.

⚖️ The Need for Political Action to Achieve Gender Equality

The final paragraph emphasizes that widespread gender equality will not be achieved through individual efforts alone. Instead, it will require substantial political will and systemic reforms, especially for the majority of the population. A more robust social welfare system and policies that support equitable domestic and professional roles for men and women are necessary to truly address these issues.

Keywords

💡Trad Wives

Trad Wives, or 'esposas tradicionais,' refers to women who embrace ultratraditional gender roles, opting for a life focused on domestic duties like housework and child-rearing, while rejecting modern concepts of financial independence. In the video, this trend is presented as a reaction to the modern pressures women face in balancing professional and domestic responsibilities.

💡Gender Roles

Gender roles are societal expectations for how men and women should behave, often tied to traditional views. In the video, the concept of 'ultratraditional gender roles' is discussed in the context of the Trad Wives movement, where women return to being homemakers, while men remain breadwinners, highlighting a nostalgic idealization of pre-feminist family structures.

💡Financial Independence

Financial independence, or the ability to support oneself without relying on a partner, is portrayed as a modern achievement for women that is being rejected by the Trad Wives. The video suggests that some women are giving up financial independence as a way to escape the stress of balancing work and family life.

💡Multiple Workload

The term 'multiple workload' refers to the dual burden many women face in managing both professional careers and domestic responsibilities. The video argues that this heavy workload has led some women to seek traditional gender roles as a way to alleviate the pressure.

💡Revolution of Gender Roles

The 'revolution of gender roles' is the shift that occurred as women increasingly joined the workforce and shared financial responsibilities with men. The video critiques this revolution as incomplete because men, in general, have not equally taken on domestic responsibilities, leaving women overburdened.

💡Division of Labor

Division of labor refers to the way responsibilities are split between partners. In the video, an equitable division of both financial and domestic duties is presented as the missing piece in the so-called 'gender revolution,' which has led to an unsustainable situation where women carry disproportionate burdens.

💡Feminism

Feminism is the advocacy for women's rights and gender equality. In the video, feminist gains such as financial independence and career opportunities are discussed, but so are their unintended consequences, such as the added stress of women juggling professional and domestic roles without sufficient support.

💡Domestic Work

Domestic work includes household tasks such as cleaning, cooking, and childcare. The video contrasts the idealized domestic work embraced by Trad Wives with the reality for many Brazilian women, who often have to manage both their own household duties and the domestic work of others as a form of employment.

💡Masculinity

Masculinity, particularly 'new masculinity,' refers to changing perceptions of manhood that include men taking on caregiving roles and sharing domestic responsibilities. The video highlights how this shift is emerging among some men but remains rare and confined mostly to wealthier, more educated segments of society.

💡Welfare State

A welfare state provides social services such as healthcare, education, and financial support. In the video, countries with strong welfare states are mentioned as having better support for gender equality, enabling more men to take on caregiving roles and reducing the pressures on women compared to countries like Brazil, where such support is lacking.

Highlights

The rise of 'trad wives' (traditional wives) reflects a movement where women choose ultratraditional gender roles, abandoning financial independence.

The 'trad wife' trend is seen as a response to the unsustainable burden of women balancing both financial and caregiving responsibilities in modern society.

One consequence of the modern gender revolution is lower marriage and childbirth rates, alongside increased divorce rates globally.

Women have embraced financial roles alongside men, but men have not equally embraced caregiving and domestic duties, creating a significant imbalance.

Vera Iaconelli suggests that a more equitable division of caregiving responsibilities between men and women is necessary to complete the gender revolution.

The traditional model, while an option for some women, has been historically flawed due to female subjugation, violence, and lack of autonomy.

In Brazil, many women bear the sole responsibility for both household income and caregiving, even when men are present in the home.

The idea of 'trad wives' in Brazil is largely unfeasible, as most households cannot rely on one income earner, typically the male.

Only a small segment of highly educated women, often married to wealthy men, can afford to choose a domestic specialization while forgoing a career.

Domestic workers in Brazil often manage both their own households and the households of wealthier women who can afford to avoid domestic chores.

The trend of 'trophy wives,' showcased on social media, involves women who don't work and delegate all domestic tasks to hired help.

Some men are embracing new masculinities, actively participating in caregiving roles, leading to healthier, less resentful relationships.

However, this shift in gender roles is primarily observed among wealthier and more educated groups in Brazil and developed countries with strong social welfare systems.

For most of Brazil's population, achieving gender equality in caregiving responsibilities will require significant political and social changes.

There is optimism for future gender equality, but it requires long-term efforts and systemic support for broader societal adoption.

Transcripts

Já ouviu falar em “trad wives”, as  chamadas “esposas tradicionais”?

É uma mulher que escolhe viver uma vida mais  

tradicional com papeis de  gênero ultratradicionais.

Para essas mulheres, independência  financeira é coisa do passado.

A moda agora é de fato voltar ao passado. 

E a mulher fica em casa e cuida da  casa e dos filhos, se eles existem.

Mas por que o retorno aos papéis tradicionais  de gênero virou tendência em pleno 2024?

Segundo especialistas, seria uma  espécie de resposta à múltipla  

jornada de trabalho enfrentada  pelas mulheres nos dias de hoje.

Os avanços que a gente conquista como  feministas, o avanço das mulheres, tem um  

quê de insustentável. A gente acumulou a tarefa de  financeiramente sustentar uma casa e a esfera de  

cuidados. Então, isso não é sustentável a médio  prazo. Em algum lugar essa corda vai estourar.

Isso gera vários resultados que  a gente observa no mundo inteiro,  

de redução da probabilidade de uma mulher se  casar, redução da probabilidade de uma mulher  

querer ter um filho, aumento das taxas  de divórcio. Então você tem uma série de  

questões familiares extremamente afetadas por  essa chamada revolução de gênero estagnada,  

no sentido de que as mulheres abraçaram os papéis  produtivos junto com os homens, elas passam a  

partilhar com os homens as responsabilidades  financeiras pelo sustento domiciliar,  

enquanto que os homens não fazem o mesmo no  sentido de abraçarem as tarefas domésticas.

Para Vera Iaconelli, seria justamente essa  a solução para a ainda incompleta equação da  

revolução de gênero: a divisão equânime  do cuidado entre homens e mulheres. 

Sem isso, a gente tem uma barreira quase  intransponível, que é o fato de que nós, mulheres,  

somos as únicas responsáveis pelo cuidado e as  mais desprestigiadas por conta disso também.  

Porque a gente sabe que o modelo conservador você  pode até escolher, mas a gente já sabe onde ele  

falhou: na sujeição feminina, na violência, na  falta de autonomia, no fato de que uma mulher  

pode sim se dedicar a ter filhos de um homem que  a sustenta, mas é só até a hora que ele quiser.

Num país como o Brasil, o mais comum é  que as mulheres acumulem essas funções que  

deveriam ser de duas pessoas. Isso mesmo  quando o pai está fisicamente presente  

em casa.  Mas também porque não faltam  histórias de homens que abandonam o lar.

As mulheres se responsabilizam sozinhas por  ambas as coisas. Os homens estão desempregados,  

mas nem por isso eles fazem papeis domésticos.

Ou seja, a fantasia das “trad wives”,  

vendida especialmente pelas gringas nas redes  sociais, está longe de ser realidade por aqui.

Pra isso existir, é preciso que apenas um adulto  do domicílio — no caso, os homens — seja de fato  

capaz de prover o sustento financeiro. E isso não  é a realidade da grande maioria das mulheres no  

Brasil, né? Apenas uma parcela muito pequena das  mulheres, normalmente de alta escolaridade, que  

poderiam escolh er ter uma carreira virtuosa no  mercado, e podem escolher se casar com homens mais  

ricos. Essas mulheres podem abraçar um movimento  desse tipo, de dizer “embora eu tenha qualificação  

para ter o tipo de carreira que eu quiser  escolher, eu prefiro a especialização doméstica.

Enquanto isso, o ganha-pão de grande parte  

das brasileiras consiste em cuidar da casa  e da família de outras mulheres que têm o  

privilégio de abrir mão não só do mercado de  trabalho, mas também das tarefas domésticas.

Quando eu acordo, meu café  da manhã já está pronto,  

porque a Catinha, que ajuda a gente  aqui em casa, já deixa tudo pronto.

São as chamadas “esposas-troféu”, outra  tendência que tem aparecido nas redes sociais.

Então essas mulheres [empregadas domésticas]  normalmente fazem todo o trabalho doméstico  

da família delas e todo o trabalho doméstico de  outras famílias, o que permite com que mulheres  

que normalmente reivindicam esses movimentos  de maior especialização na verdade nem tarefa  

doméstica fazem, porque as tarefas domésticas que  elas fazem são apenas de supervisão do trabalho de  

outra mulher, geralmente pobre e negra, que  vai fazer o trabalho doméstico mais pesado.

Enquanto isso, as patroas passam o dia produzindo  

conteúdo para ostentar e defender  um estilo de vida sem trabalho.

Hoje eu vou provar que uma esposa-troféu tem muita  

coisa para fazer, sim. Não  trabalhar ocupa muito tempo.

E antes que alguém venha comentar aqui que “nem  todo homem…”, não estamos dizendo que nenhum  

homem é capaz de assumir responsabilidades  ou dividir as tarefas com as mulheres. 

A gente tem, sim, uma nova masculinidade  surgindo a partir do novo pai, do novo  

cuidador. Há homens que estão curtindo a ideia  não de se tornar mulher nem de tomar “red pill”,  

mas de se tornarem homens melhores  mesmo numa relação mais igual,  

e eles estão curtindo isso, porque eles  conseguem ter relações menos ressentidas  

com as companheiras deles. Então a  gente tem coisas a nosso favor, sim. 

Porém, em geral, esse tipo de comportamento  se restringe às camadas mais abastadas e  

escolarizadas da sociedade brasileira  e dos países mais desenvolvidos,  

que têm uma política de bem-estar  social mais robusta. Para a grande  

maioria da população, a solução depende  principalmente de vontade política. 

Ou seja, é um processo muito mais longo que a  gente tem que trilhar para que isso aconteça.