How To Know If You’re Making The Right Decision | Mel Robbins

Summary

The video script discusses the dilemma of making decisions with the heart or the head. It emphasizes trusting one's heart and soul for life choices, while using the brain for logical tasks like math or contracts. The speaker suggests a test to determine if a decision expands or shrinks one's life possibilities. Choosing to expand, even if it's scary, leads to a more fulfilling life in the long run, whereas decisions that shrink possibilities, even if they seem safe, are advised against.

Takeaways

• 🤔 The question of whether to make decisions with your heart or head is a common struggle.
• 💔 It's challenging to discern between what your heart feels and what your brain thinks.
• 🧠 Use your brain for practical tasks like math and reading contracts.
• ❤️ Trust your heart and soul for making decisions that affect your emotional well-being.
• 📈 Use a simple test to evaluate decisions: Does it expand your future or shrink your possibilities?
• 🚫 If a decision will inhibit or silence you, it's likely not the right choice.
• 🌟 Prioritize decisions that open up new possibilities and raise your voice.
• 🔮 Consider both the short-term and long-term impacts of your decisions.
• 😣 Making expansive decisions can be scary and uncomfortable in the short term.
• 🏆 Long-term, decisions from the heart often lead to a more fulfilling life.
• 📢 Share your experiences using the 'expand versus shrink' scale to make decisions.

Q & A

What is the main dilemma Emily is trying to address in her question?

Emily is trying to understand how to differentiate between making decisions based on emotions (heart) versus logic (head) and how to determine which one to listen to.

What is Mel's stance on whether to make decisions with the heart or the head?

Mel believes in making decisions with the heart and soul, suggesting that the head should be used for logical tasks like math or reading contracts.

What is the simple test Mel suggests to determine if a decision aligns with one's heart and soul?

Mel suggests asking whether the decision expands your future or possibilities in life. If it does, it's a 'yes' decision; if it shrinks or inhibits you, it's a 'no'.

Why might following the heart's decision be challenging in the short term?

Following the heart's decision can be challenging in the short term because it might involve uncomfortable changes such as moving, changing jobs, or having difficult conversations.

What is the long-term benefit of making decisions based on one's heart and soul according to Mel?

The long-term benefit is living a life that is true to oneself, which Mel suggests leads to the best life, even if the decisions are not safe in the moment.

What is the example Mel uses to illustrate the conflict between the heart and the head?

Mel uses the example of a friend who knows her relationship is not right despite it being easy and comfortable, illustrating the internal conflict between what feels right and what seems logical.

How does Mel suggest one should prepare for the impact of making an expansive decision?

Mel suggests bracing for impact and putting up 'force fields' as a metaphor for preparing oneself mentally and emotionally for the challenges that come with making heart-based decisions.

What does Mel mean by 'expands you' in the context of decision-making?

Mel means that a decision should open up new possibilities, opportunities, and growth for one's life, rather than limiting or reducing them.

What does Mel mean by 'shrinks you' in the context of decision-making?

Mel means that a decision that limits one's potential, stifles growth, or reduces opportunities for the future is 'shrinking' and should be avoided.

How can one use the 'expansive versus shrink' scale to make decisions, as suggested by Mel?

One can use this scale by evaluating whether a decision leads to personal growth and new opportunities (expansive) or restricts and confines (shrinks), and choosing accordingly.

What does Mel encourage the audience to do with the 'expansive versus shrink' scale?

Mel encourages the audience to apply this scale to their current decisions and to share how they use it by submitting their questions using the hashtag AskMel.