dating tips for demisexual #demisexuality #dating

Summary

In this video, the speaker discusses the challenges faced by demisexual individuals in modern dating, emphasizing the importance of emotional connection over physical attraction. They share personal experiences and offer advice on navigating the dating world, such as finding partners with similar values and avoiding the pressure to engage in sexual activities prematurely. The speaker also addresses the unique struggles of demisexual men and the societal expectations that can lead to feelings of shame and rejection.

Takeaways

• 😀 The speaker is trying to smile more in their videos after feedback about seeming angry.
• 🏳️ The video discusses the experience of identifying as demisexual or romantic asexual and the speaker's personal journey with these identities.
• 🔄 The speaker realized they identify more as demisexual after a recent experience, as they sometimes think about sexual things but not in a typical way.
• 🚹 There is societal pressure on demisexual men to be sexually active, which can lead to feelings of disgrace and shame if they are not interested in sex.
• 👥 The speaker suggests that demisexual individuals should seek dating pools with people who share similar standards and are interested in emotional connection before physical intimacy.
• 💔 Demisexual individuals often face the issue of forming emotional attachments before feeling comfortable with physical intimacy, which can lead to heartbreak if the other party is only interested in sex.
• 📱 The speaker mentions the negative impact of social media and image-based dating on demisexual individuals, as it often prioritizes physical attraction over emotional connection.
• 🚫 Demisexual people should avoid compromising their ideals by engaging in physical intimacy too soon in hopes of fostering an emotional connection.
• 👕 The speaker advises against using physical appearance to attract attention on dating platforms, as it can lead to unwanted sexual expectations.
• 🕒 Patience and learning to filter out people who waste time are important for demisexual individuals when dating.
• 🌐 The speaker emphasizes the importance of navigating the dating world in a way that suits the individual's unique experience, as no two demisexual people will have the same experience.

Q & A

Why did the speaker stop identifying as asexual and start identifying as demisexual?

The speaker stopped identifying as asexual because they had a recent experience that made them realize they didn't identify 100% with asexuality. They sometimes think about sexual things when they find someone aesthetically attractive, which doesn't align with being asexual.

What societal expectation does the speaker mention as particularly challenging for demisexual men?

The speaker mentions that the societal expectation for demisexual men to be sexually 'viral' or 'feral' is challenging, as they are often expected to be sexual creatures regulated by females, leading to disgrace and shame if they don't want to be sexual.

What advice does the speaker give to demisexual individuals, especially in the context of modern dating?

The speaker advises demisexual individuals to be patient, to filter out people who waste their time, and to not compromise their ideals by engaging in sexual activities just to foster an emotional connection.

What does the speaker suggest about the importance of aesthetic attraction in their experience as a demisexual?

The speaker suggests that aesthetic attraction is important in their experience as a demisexual, as they think about sexual things when they see someone they find aesthetically attractive, but it doesn't necessarily lead to sexual desire without an emotional connection.

How does the speaker describe their approach to dating and managing expectations?

The speaker describes their approach to dating as cautious and strategic. They delete numbers to avoid getting too attached, put their demisexual identity upfront in their dating profiles and conversations, and try to enjoy the moment without expecting further contact.

What is the speaker's view on the role of emotional attachment in the context of demisexual attraction?

The speaker views emotional attachment as crucial for demisexual attraction. They mention that demisexual individuals often wait for an emotional attachment before feeling sexually attracted, which can be problematic in a society that prioritizes instant sexual gratification.

What challenges does the speaker identify for demisexual individuals in the LGBTQ+ community?

The speaker identifies challenges such as the pressure to conform to sexual expectations within the LGBTQ+ community, the difficulty of finding partners who understand and respect demisexual boundaries, and the struggle with body image and the perception of one's primary asset being sex.

How does the speaker address the issue of instant gratification in modern dating and its impact on demisexual individuals?

The speaker criticizes the instant gratification approach in modern dating, stating that it is not conducive to the needs of demisexual individuals who require emotional connection before sexual attraction. They advise against rushing into sexual activities and emphasize the importance of building a strong emotional foundation.

What strategies does the speaker recommend for demisexual individuals to navigate the dating world?

The speaker recommends strategies such as being upfront about one's demisexual identity, engaging in non-intimate activities to build emotional connections, and being selective about dating pools to find partners with similar values and expectations.

How does the speaker's personal experience with dating and relationships reflect the broader challenges faced by demisexual individuals?

The speaker's personal experience reflects the broader challenges faced by demisexual individuals, such as the difficulty in finding understanding partners, the pressure to engage in sexual activities despite not feeling a strong emotional connection, and the struggle with societal and dating norms that do not align with demisexual needs.