Keep your goals to yourself | Derek Sivers

Summary

The script challenges the common belief that sharing personal goals with others boosts motivation. It explains that announcing goals can lead to a 'social reality' illusion, where the mind feels prematurely satisfied, reducing the drive to complete the necessary work. Studies from various years support this, showing that those who keep their goals to themselves tend to work harder and longer towards achieving them. The speaker suggests resisting the urge to share goals and, if necessary, to discuss them in a way that avoids the premature sense of accomplishment.

Takeaways

• 🤔 Think about your biggest personal goal and feel the motivation it brings.
• 🗣️ Saying your goal out loud can actually make you less likely to achieve it.
• 🧠 Psychological studies have shown that telling others your goal creates a 'social reality' in your mind, tricking you into feeling like you've already achieved it.
• 💪 Ideally, you should only feel satisfied once you've done the actual work towards your goal.
• 📚 Historical psychological research supports this phenomenon, starting from Kurt Lewin in 1926 to Peter Gollwitzer's studies in 1982 and 2009.
• 📈 A study with 163 participants demonstrated that those who announced their goals worked less time towards achieving them compared to those who kept their goals private.
• 🏃‍♂️ The average time spent working on goals was significantly less for those who announced them, indicating a decrease in motivation.
• 🤐 Keeping your goals to yourself can help maintain your drive and focus on the actual tasks needed to achieve them.
• 🔒 If you must discuss your goals, frame them in a way that doesn't provide immediate satisfaction, such as outlining the hard work still needed.
• 🤔 The script encourages reflection on the common advice of sharing goals with friends for accountability, suggesting that this might not always be beneficial.
• 👏 The audience is left with a thought-provoking question about how they will handle sharing their goals in the future.

Q & A

What is the main point of the script?

The main point of the script is that announcing your personal goals to others can actually make you less likely to achieve them due to a psychological phenomenon called 'social reality'.

Why does stating your goals out loud make you less likely to achieve them?

Stating your goals out loud can lead to a sense of satisfaction and a feeling that the goal has already been achieved in the mind, which psychologists call 'social reality.' This can reduce your motivation to do the actual hard work required to achieve the goal.

What is the term used to describe the psychological effect of announcing goals?

The term used to describe this psychological effect is 'social reality.'

What did Kurt Lewin, the founder of social psychology, call this phenomenon?

Kurt Lewin called this phenomenon 'substitution,' indicating that the act of announcing a goal can substitute for the actual work needed to achieve it.

What did Wera Mahler's 1933 findings suggest about acknowledging goals?

Wera Mahler found that when a goal is acknowledged by others, it feels real in the mind, which can lead to a premature sense of achievement.

Who wrote a book about this phenomenon and conducted new tests in 2009?

Peter Gollwitzer wrote a book about this phenomenon and conducted new tests in 2009.

What was the experimental setup in the 2009 tests conducted by Peter Gollwitzer?

In the 2009 tests, 163 people were divided into four separate groups. Each person wrote down their personal goal, and then half of them announced their commitment to the goal to the room, while the other half did not. They were then given 45 minutes of work that would directly lead them towards their goal, with the option to stop at any time.

What were the results of the 2009 tests regarding the time spent working towards the goal?

Those who kept their goals to themselves worked the entire 45 minutes on average, while those who announced their goals quit after only 33 minutes on average.

How did the participants who announced their goals feel after the experiment?

Participants who announced their goals felt much closer to achieving their goal after the experiment, despite spending less time working on it.

What is the advice given in the script for those who feel the need to talk about their goals?

The advice given is to resist the temptation to announce your goal or to state it in a way that gives no satisfaction, such as focusing on the actions needed to achieve the goal rather than the goal itself.

What is the final message to the audience regarding their goals?

The final message is to be cautious about announcing their goals to others and to understand that the act of talking about goals can sometimes hinder the actual achievement of those goals.