Conquering the Uphill Battle to Leadership | Dillyara Dosmakova | TEDxKIMEP Women

Summary

The speaker reflects on how the caregiving mindset many women are raised with often holds them back from stepping into leadership roles. Despite being diligent, committed, and hard-working, women often hesitate to lead due to self-doubt and concerns about taking opportunities from others. They also face barriers like lack of visibility in informal networking spaces and competition with other women for limited leadership spots. The speaker proposes the 'ACT' framework—Acknowledge and Act, Connect and Communicate, Transform and Collaborate—as a solution to overcome these challenges, empowering women to claim their leadership seats and create space for others.

Takeaways

• 😀 Caregiver's mindset: Many women approach leadership with a caregiver's mindset, prioritizing the needs of others before their own. This mindset is shaped from an early age and can influence decision-making and career progression.
• 😀 Leadership hesitation: When women are offered leadership roles, they may hesitate due to self-doubt, fearing that they might take away opportunities from others or questioning their own ability to lead with confidence.
• 😀 Gender double standards: Traits such as decisiveness and confidence are often seen positively in men, but negatively in women. Women who exhibit these traits are sometimes perceived as arrogant, aggressive, or difficult to handle.
• 😀 Visibility matters: It’s not just about performing well at work, but also about being visible. Women often miss out on informal networking opportunities, which can impact their chances of being considered for leadership roles.
• 😀 The competition between women: Limited leadership spots for women create competition among them, leading to rivalry and sometimes shutting down good relationships or failing to support each other professionally.
• 😀 Importance of mentorship: To break barriers, women should connect with mentors who can advocate for their career progression and support their professional growth.
• 😀 Strategic communication: Women should communicate their career aspirations to their employers and seek guidance, not just within their work environment but also by expanding their network outside of it, such as through LinkedIn groups or industry associations.
• 😀 Partner support: A strong support system, especially from spouses, is crucial for women to pursue leadership roles. Sharing their goals and struggles with their partners can help them navigate the challenges of a leadership journey.
• 😀 Collaborative mindset: Women should transform competitive mindsets into collaborative ones, supporting each other publicly and working together to challenge the status quo in the workplace.
• 😀 Leadership is earned: Leadership is not about gender or skin color. It’s about earning and claiming the opportunity to lead. Women should act today to prepare themselves to claim their place at the leadership table and create room for others to follow.

Q & A

What is the significance of the family dinner described in the transcript?

The family dinner serves as a metaphor for the speaker’s caregiving mindset, where she takes on the responsibility of ensuring everyone’s needs are met before tending to her own. This mindset, she argues, is ingrained in women from a young age and affects how they approach leadership roles.

What are the three primary barriers that women face in leadership roles, according to the speaker?

The three primary barriers are: 1) The caregiver's mindset, which can cause women to hesitate in taking leadership roles; 2) Lack of visibility, as women often miss key networking opportunities that influence leadership decisions; 3) Competition among women for leadership opportunities due to the limited spots available.

Why is the caregiver’s mindset considered a barrier to leadership for women?

The caregiver’s mindset stems from social conditioning, where women are taught to prioritize others' needs over their own. In leadership settings, this mindset leads to hesitation when opportunities arise, as women may feel they are taking opportunities away from others or doubt their ability to lead.

How does the speaker suggest women can overcome the caregiver's mindset in leadership roles?

The speaker suggests that women should acknowledge the caregiver's mindset, but view it as a strength rather than a weakness. True leaders lead with their heart and care for the well-being of their team, which is a positive quality in leadership.

What role does visibility play in career advancement, and how can women increase their visibility?

Visibility is crucial for career advancement, as many important decisions are made in informal settings like networking events, where women are often absent. To increase visibility, women are encouraged to attend networking events, participate in team-building activities, and actively communicate their career aspirations.

Why do women often avoid networking events and what is the consequence of this avoidance?

Women often avoid networking events because they may view them as a waste of time or prioritize family commitments instead. The consequence is that they miss out on key conversations where leadership opportunities and promotions are discussed, resulting in a lack of visibility and inclusion in those opportunities.

How does competition among women for leadership roles affect their professional relationships?

Competition among women for limited leadership roles can lead to rivalry and a lack of support between female colleagues. It can also result in women shutting down relationships with others in the same position or not advocating for one another’s career growth.

What is the 'ACT' framework and how does it help women overcome the barriers to leadership?

The 'ACT' framework consists of three steps: Acknowledge and Act, Connect and Communicate, and Transform and Collaborate. It encourages women to act on leadership opportunities without hesitation, build strategic connections and visibility, and collaborate with other women in a supportive, non-competitive manner to foster collective success.

How can women build strategic connections to help with their career growth?

Women can build strategic connections by reaching out to mentors, seeking support from colleagues in higher positions, attending industry events, and engaging in cross-functional projects. Additionally, developing relationships with family members, particularly spouses, is recommended to gain personal support in pursuing leadership goals.

What does the speaker mean by 'Leadership has no gender, nor does it have skin color'?

The speaker is emphasizing that leadership is not determined by gender or appearance. It is earned through action, skill, and the ability to lead effectively, regardless of a person’s identity. Leadership is about the ability to inspire and guide others, not about fitting a particular stereotype.

What is the key takeaway the speaker wants the audience to remember from the speech?

The key takeaway is that leadership is not a given; it is something that must be claimed. Women should act today, embrace leadership opportunities, and create space for others to follow in their footsteps, breaking down barriers for future generations of female leaders.