I SUFFER FROM ANXIETY & LOW SELF-ESTEEM. All I want is to love and be loved.
Summary
TLDRThe transcript is a heartfelt message addressing the struggles of anxiety and self-worth in a young adult's life. It warns of the vulnerability to abuse due to low self-esteem and the societal pressures to conform. The speaker emphasizes the importance of authentic love and self-acceptance, as per Christ's teachings, and the danger of seeking validation from social media and the world's distorted perceptions. The core message is that true love and self-worth come from being genuine and allowing Christ's love to shape one's identity, rather than the world's superficial standards.
Takeaways
- 😔 The speaker expresses deep anxiety and a fear of not being good enough, which affects their emotional well-being.
- 🤔 They worry about how they are perceived by others and feel their self-worth is heavily dependent on external validation.
- 💔 The fear of not being loved or worthy of love is a significant source of distress for the speaker.
- ⚠️ The message warns of the vulnerability that comes from low self-esteem and the potential for abuse in various forms.
- 👣 The advice given is to stand on one's own and move forward independently, both spiritually and mentally.
- 📊 The speaker criticizes the tendency of young adults to compare themselves to the curated realities presented on social media.
- 💌 Love, by its nature, is transformative, but one should not change their core self to be loved; true love accepts and reshapes you as you are.
- 🔥 The speaker's greatest fear is living a life that is not true to themselves, shaped by the world's expectations rather than their own identity.
- 🙏 The importance of allowing Christ's love to shape one's identity is emphasized, as it leads to becoming more authentically oneself.
- 🌟 The speaker asserts that everyone is inherently worthy of love simply by virtue of being created by God.
- 🙌 The speaker encourages embracing the cross and allowing spiritual strength to guide personal growth and transformation.
Q & A
What is the main concern expressed by the person in the transcript?
-The person expresses a deep struggle with anxiety and a constant worry about how they are perceived by others, which heavily affects their self-image and emotional well-being.
Why does the person feel they are not good enough?
-The person's feeling of inadequacy stems from a fear of not being worthy of love and a belief that they will never be truly loved due to their perceived shortcomings.
What does the person believe is central to Christ's teachings?
-The person believes that love is at the center of Christ's teachings and that their worries are rooted in the possibility of not being deserving of such love.
What warning does the responder give to the person about their current state?
-The responder warns that the person is currently at risk of being abused due to their low self-image and the need to please others, which makes them vulnerable to physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual abuse.
Why does the responder emphasize the importance of standing on one's own two feet?
-The responder emphasizes this to encourage the person to develop self-reliance and self-worth, which is crucial for avoiding abuse and for personal growth.
What societal factors contribute to the person's anxiety according to the responder?
-The responder points out that the younger generation's need to constantly advertise themselves and measure up to unrealistic standards set by social media contributes to their anxiety.
How does the responder define love and its role in personal change?
-The responder defines love as a transformative force that changes individuals by helping them let go of inauthentic aspects and discover their true selves, rather than forcing them to become someone else to be loved.
What is the 'image of hell' described by the responder?
-The 'image of hell' is described as living a life that is not true to oneself, being loved without being one's true self, and dying without having experienced genuine love or lived authentically.
What does the responder suggest as the antidote to the world's influence on personal identity?
-The responder suggests reflecting the values of Christ and allowing oneself to be shaped by Christ's love, which encourages authenticity and the discovery of one's true self.
Why does the responder believe everyone is worthy of love simply by virtue of being created by God?
-The responder believes in the inherent worth of every individual because God creates out of love, implying that every creation is an act of love and therefore deserving of love.
What does the responder hope for the person in terms of their spiritual journey?
-The responder hopes that the person will allow Christ to shape them, become the person God created them to be, and through their transformed life, contribute to the salvation of the world through prayer and example.
Outlines
😔 Struggling with Anxiety and Self-Worth
The speaker begins by expressing their lifelong struggle with anxiety, which has intensified in young adulthood. They are deeply concerned with how others perceive them, and their self-image is heavily influenced by this perception. The fear of not being good enough leads to feelings of despair. The speaker yearns for love and acceptance, which they believe are central to Christ's teachings, but their worries stem from a fear of not being worthy of love. The response to this concern is a warning about the vulnerability that comes with a low self-image and the potential for abuse, both physical and emotional. The speaker advises being cautious and learning to stand on one's own before seeking love, emphasizing the importance of self-worth and independence.
💔 The Dangers of Conditional Love and Authenticity
This paragraph delves into the concept of love and its transformative power. The speaker argues that love should not require one to change their essence to be worthy of it. Instead, true love should accept and cherish one for who they are. The speaker fears living a life that is not authentic, warning that pretending to be someone else for the sake of love can lead to a life devoid of genuine connection and fulfillment. They emphasize the importance of allowing Christ's love to shape one's identity, rather than the world's expectations, which can lead to a loss of self and a hollow existence.
🙏 Embracing Divine Love and Becoming One's True Self
In the final paragraph, the speaker reassures the recipient of their inherent worthiness of love, simply by virtue of being a creation of God. They argue that all personal flaws and weaknesses are irrelevant in the face of divine love. The speaker encourages embracing the reality of Christ and allowing the cross to shape one's life, rather than running away from it. They express a personal connection to the recipient, seeing a reflection of their own potential journey, and offer prayers for their safety and growth into the person God intended them to be. The speaker concludes with a prayer for the recipient's transformation into a saint, through the grace of God's love.
Mindmap
Keywords
💡Anxiety
💡Self-image
💡Worthiness
💡Love
💡Authenticity
💡Abuse
💡Social Media
💡Christ's Teachings
💡Virtues
💡Transformation
💡Unfinished Beings
Highlights
The speaker shares their personal struggle with anxiety and how it affects their emotional well-being and self-image.
The speaker expresses their desire to love and be loved, and their fear of not being worthy of love due to their worries and anxieties.
The speaker warns the recipient that their current state of low self-esteem and need to please others makes them vulnerable to various forms of abuse.
The speaker emphasizes the importance of standing on one's own and moving forward independently to avoid being taken advantage of.
The speaker discusses how social media and societal pressures can lead to unhealthy comparisons and contribute to anxiety and depression.
The speaker explains that love should not require one to change who they are fundamentally, but should instead accept and love them as they are.
The speaker argues that trying to be someone else to gain love is ultimately unfulfilling and leads to a life not truly lived.
The speaker shares their greatest fear of living a life that is not authentically their own and the importance of staying true to oneself.
The speaker emphasizes that being loved by God is a fundamental truth that is not dependent on one's flaws or shortcomings.
The speaker encourages the recipient to allow Christ's love to shape them and guide them towards becoming the person they were meant to be.
The speaker warns against the dangers of letting the world's values and superficial standards shape one's identity and self-worth.
The speaker shares their personal journey of accepting God's love and becoming more authentically themselves as a result.
The speaker discusses the transformative power of Christ's love and how it can help one become more aligned with their true self.
The speaker offers prayers and blessings for the recipient, expressing their hope for the recipient's growth and spiritual journey.
The speaker concludes by emphasizing the importance of being a blessing to others and the world through one's authentic self and prayers.
Transcripts
dear father sort of him
I have been Afflicted with anxiety for
the large majority of my life
and as a young adult I find its grip
know to be stronger than ever on my
emotional well-being
I find myself constantly worrying about
what others think of me and my
self-image is so heavily dependent on
how I believe myself to be perceived in
the eyes of others
I constantly worry that I am not good
enough
and these thoughts cause me to retreat
into despair
above all
I want to love and be loved
it seems to me that love is at the
center of Christ's teachings and my
worries stem from the possibility that I
am not worthy of being loved
or will never be truly loved
and are these ideas
terrify me to no end
oh dear seraphim
I've chosen to respond to this message
to this email actually of yours
because there are two things in here
that speak very closely to my own heart
um first of all I need to say this
from from this email and given your age
you need to be very very careful with
this passion and you need to be very
careful at this particular time in your
life because my dear one you are you are
perfectly ripe for abuse right now
with this low image and this need to
please others this
unhealthy ability that you've developed
to reflect
the reality around you and to accept it
as who you are this makes you ripe for
abuse not only physical abuse but also
emotional mental abuse and even
spiritual abuse
until you stand on your own two feet or
at least until you begin to slowly move
forward on your own two feet and by that
I mean being who you are to the degree
to which it is possible to all of us
until a van abuse is always always a
possibility and a lot of our sins and a
lot of our weaknesses and Falls come in
fact from the abuse of others which
sometimes is visible
and other times it's not
be very careful and guard yourself at
this stage in your life until you see
that you can move forward on your own
two feet
spiritually speaking mentally as well
there is this
need of yours to reflect what is around
you in order to be loved my self-image
you say is so heavily dependent on how I
believe myself to be perceived in the
eyes of others
and this is a very very common in your
generation you say you are a young adult
very young people and young adults
I suppose because of the society that we
the older generation have built for you
you have this need to constantly
advertise who you are and you constantly
measure yourselves against realities
that have nothing to do with reality
with a capital r
you measure yourselves against what
others advertise in turn
you see when you look at someone's
Social Media or when you read about the
life of someone else those people are
only going to put forward and advertise
the the good aspects of their lives and
even those good aspects of their lives
they are going to be
exponentially increased nobody's going
to post about their sadnesses or
weaknesses and even when they do that
there's a touch of Pride there's a touch
of um
falseness in there
we are aware of the best part of their
lives and even that polished and
increased but when it comes to our own
realities we are aware of our deepest
lowest selves
and our deepest lowest moments and then
this constant comparison creates anxiety
creates tension and as you say
depression and despair
love
changes
by definition Love Changes but you do
not change yourself prior to being loved
you don't become someone
else than who you are in order for a
certain person to love you
you love that person as you are and if
by the grace of God that person loves
you back then this Mutual
becoming this Oneness that God creates
that love creates this Oneness will in
turn reshape you and change you you
don't become someone you're not in order
to be loved because even if then you
think you experience love who is that
person who is loved because it's not
truly you is it
if you are a certain way and you you
mimic being someone else and then
someone falls in love with you or you
find love in a community even in a
monastic Community if you pretend to be
someone you're not
who are those people loving and is that
love truly yours does it truly belong to
you does it truly touch you in in the
core of your being
the answer will always be no and sooner
or later you'll feel that
and for me dear sir of him this is the
image of hell
I've said this before many times my my
greatest fear is to go through life as
someone I'm not
my greatest fear is to end up on my
deathbed
having lived a life that was not truly
my own having loved with a love that was
never my own having Been Loved by people
without their love truly touching me
because I was never who I truly am
before them and even dying a death
that is not my own
the image of hell for me is to be on the
death bed dying of death and
contemplating a life that are not my own
because I have allowed fear and anxiety
and the need to please the world to
shape me
we are by definition unfinished beings
We Are all uh like a big fetus each and
every one of us we are a fetus in the
womb of this world being shaped being
slowly created still by God
and we should reflect the values of
Christ the values of true love in order
for us to be shaped
if we reflect the world we shall forever
be dependent on the world and we become
like the world
if we reflect the world we become
world-like and who we become disappears
dies off and becomes dust with the world
but if you allow Christ to shape you if
you allow His Image to be reflected on
you then you become christ-like
and you shall survive the death of
everything that is temporary and
transient
you become Christ like a holy man a
saint
all love changes
even loving Christ will change you but
the difference between Christ loving you
and pushing you to change
and the world loving you and pushing you
to change is that Christ is pushing you
to let go of the things that are not
authentically yours
and to discovering yourself the seeds of
those values and virtues that make you
who you truly are
Christ's love will push you to change in
the direction of you becoming who you've
always been in his eyes his love will
push you in the direction of changing
towards becoming the saint he created
you to be
the love of the world if you allow that
to shape you will push you into you
becoming like the world
and that's not something I wish for
anyone
including myself
my dear dear dear seraphim you are
worthy of love
simply because God created you I don't
need to know more than that I need to
know that you are real
and beyond that all your sins all your
weaknesses all your inabilities uh to to
be who you think you should be are
completely irrelevant
if God Made You God loved you loves you
and will forever love you
because God creates out of love you
could not have been created otherwise
I'm I'm not certain whether or not you
are Orthodox but in a way it's
irrelevant
if you were Orthodox you would have
known this better but
even without being Orthodox know at
least from me you don't have to be
Orthodox You Are a Human Being you live
you you breathe God gave you breath God
created you and since God can only
create out of love
that means that you are worthy of love
and you are worthy of his eternal love
not this transient
dust made love of the world
reflect the realities of Christ
don't run away from the cross allow the
cross to shape you not running away from
the cross to shape you allow the
strength the the spiritual strength of
the Cross to become the element that
shapes you that shows you who you should
become not a spiritual fear and
cowardice
I pray for you and I will pray for you
by your real name not by seraphim
because I see in you on a version of
myself someone I could have become had I
not been given this Grace at one point
in my life to Simply
madly accept God's love and follow it
regardless of what that did to my social
life in my late teens and early twenties
and I've learned by experience that the
more
I love Christ the more I become someone
I somehow felt was real
a lot more real if you can say that in
an existential Deep Way than who I was
before not as popular as before but
somehow the closer I got to Christ the
less relevant popularity in the world
became
I shall pray for you both so that you
are safe from abuse these ears while you
learn to move forward but also so that
you become that man whom God created you
to be so that you become that Saint whom
God created you out of his love to be
because if you get to be that Saint and
you get to pray for me and for this
community and for the world then the
World At Large through your prayer has a
better chance of being saved my dear sir
of him
be blessed everyone be blessed to the
core of your being
amen amen
amen
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