年轻人,你为什么不结婚?|结婚|单身|不婚|不育|传宗接代|信心|王局拍案20230615
Summary
TLDR本视频探讨了当前年轻人不愿结婚的现象,这一话题在中国互联网上引起热议。视频通过网上搜索和统计数据,展示了年轻人对于结婚和生育的消极态度,以及结婚率自2013年以来的持续下降趋势。分析了传统婚姻的经济互助、生育、性生活和情感需求四大功能,以及现代社会中这些功能的变化。指出中国年轻人面临的特殊问题,如高房价、生活成本和对未来缺乏希望感,这些因素加剧了结婚意愿的下降。视频最后提出了政府可能采取的措施,以应对这一社会趋势,并对未来中国的发展提出了担忧。
Takeaways
- 📉 中国结婚率持续下降,2023年结婚登记数量降至6.83百万对,为1986年有记录以来最低。
- 🔍 年轻人不愿意结婚的现象在中国互联网上引起热议,许多人认为结婚会导致经济负担增加。
- 💰 经济因素是年轻人不愿结婚的主要原因之一,包括高昂的彩礼和购房压力。
- 👫 性别比例失衡导致婚姻市场竞争加剧,男性面临更大的结婚难度。
- 👶 传统婚姻的四大功能——经济互助、生育、性需求满足和情感需求——在现代社会中发生了变化。
- 👴 随着社会保障体系的建立,养儿防老的观念逐渐改变,孩子从投资变为消费。
- 🚫 现代社会中,性需求不再需要通过婚姻来满足,这减弱了婚姻的吸引力。
- 💔 情感的易变和不稳定性使得婚姻的吸引力降低,年轻人更加重视个人自由和独立。
- 🏠 年轻人普遍感受到社会上升通道的封闭和不确定性,这导致他们对结婚和生育持谨慎态度。
- 🌐 年轻人不愿结婚是一个全球现象,不仅仅是中国特有的问题。
Q & A
为什么年轻人现在不愿意结婚?
-根据视频脚本,年轻人不愿意结婚的原因包括经济压力、对个人自由的追求、对婚姻和生育的传统观念的改变,以及社会竞争的加剧等。
中国近年来结婚率下降的统计数据是怎样的?
-自1986年以来,中国的结婚率一直在下降,2023年全年结婚登记的夫妇总数为683万对,这是自1986年有统计数据以来的最低记录。
结婚率下降与疫情有关吗?
-尽管疫情可能导致了一定程度的结婚率下降,但数据显示,即使疫情结束,人们的结婚意愿并没有增加,结婚率仍然在下降。
结婚率下降对社会有哪些潜在影响?
-结婚率下降可能导致新生儿数量锐减,从而对社会的人口结构和经济发展产生长远影响。
年轻人对婚姻有哪些新的看法?
-年轻人认为婚姻不再是生活的必要部分,他们更看重个人自由和生活质量,不愿意因为婚姻而牺牲这些。
年轻人为什么会觉得结婚会降低生活质量?
-结婚可能意味着经济负担、家庭责任和社会压力的增加,年轻人担心这些因素会影响他们的个人发展和生活享受。
为什么说现代婚姻中情感因素变得不那么重要?
-因为情感是易变的,而传统婚姻中经济互助、生育和性生活的功能在现代社会已经高度社会化,因此婚姻的主要功能转变为情感满足,这使得婚姻变得更加不稳定。
中国特有的社会背景如何影响年轻人的婚姻观?
-中国特有的计划生育政策、性别比例失衡、高房价和生活成本等因素,使得年轻人面临更大的结婚压力和挑战。
政府可以采取哪些措施来应对结婚率下降的趋势?
-政府可以尝试将婚姻和生育分开,鼓励非婚生育,提供更多的社会支持和福利,以及增加年轻人对未来的信心和希望。
为什么说婚姻在现代社会中变成了一种消费?
-随着社会的发展,婚姻不再仅仅是经济互助和生育的工具,而是更多地涉及到情感满足和生活质量的追求,这使得婚姻成为一种个人选择和消费行为。
年轻人对婚姻的犹豫不决反映出哪些社会问题?
-年轻人对婚姻的犹豫不决反映出他们对未来的不确定感、对个人发展的重视以及对社会压力的抗拒。
Outlines
📉 年轻人不愿结婚现象
本段讨论了年轻人不愿意结婚的现象,指出这在中国互联网上成为热门话题。通过在线搜索发现,许多年轻人认为结婚会导致经济负担加重,宁愿单身。此外,提到了中国民政部发布的最新婚姻统计数据,显示去年全国结婚登记数量为683万对,离婚为210万对,其中包含超过百万的再婚,首次婚姻数量大约为500万对。这是自1986年有统计数据以来的最低记录,并且从2013年的高峰逐年下降。尽管疫情结束,但结婚意愿并未上升,反映出年轻人普遍不愿意结婚的趋势。
👫 婚姻的传统功能与现代变化
这段内容分析了婚姻在社会中的四个传统功能:经济互助、生育、性生活和情感满足。指出现代社会中,前三个功能已经高度社会化,婚姻的功能主要转变为情感满足。然而,情感是多变且不可靠的,这导致现代工业化国家的年轻人普遍不愿意结婚。此外,提到了中国特有的问题,如计划生育导致的适婚人口减少和性别比例失衡,以及婚姻成本的上升,使得婚姻竞争变得更加激烈。
💰 婚姻的经济竞争与性别角色
本段讨论了婚姻的经济竞争性如何增加,尤其是在性别比例失衡的背景下。提到了彩礼的上升,反映了女性在婚姻市场中的高需求。同时,分析了男性和女性对婚姻的看法差异,男性从婚姻中获益更多,而女性在婚后获益较少,这导致女性对婚姻的犹豫。还提到了不结婚的好处,如更多的自由和无需承担家庭责任。
🚫 性、情感与婚姻的关系变化
这段内容探讨了性、情感与婚姻之间的关系如何随时间变化。指出现代社会中,性不再需要通过婚姻来实现,婚前关系和多种性体验方式变得普遍。情感方面,虽然人类对情感的渴望没有改变,但情感本身是易变的,这使得维持婚姻的难度增加。现代社会中,婚姻的稳定性不再依赖于经济互助、生育和性,而是主要依赖于情感,这使得婚姻变得更加不稳定。
🤔 年轻人对婚姻的态度与社会挑战
本段分析了年轻人推迟结婚年龄的原因,包括对婚姻经济负担的担忧、社会上升通道的封闭感和整体不确定性。提到了女性对男性在婚姻中的经济要求,如支付彩礼和购房,这对许多男性来说是不现实的。还提到了年轻人对于生育的担忧,他们认为养育孩子的成本太高,而且孩子长大后可能不会回报父母。政府在改变这一趋势上面临困难,提出了一些政策建议,如分离婚姻和生育,给予非婚生家庭更多关怀和福利。
🌐 中国婚姻率下降的普遍与特殊原因
最后一段总结了中国婚姻率下降的普遍因素和特殊原因,强调了婚姻竞争的激烈和年轻人的无助感。提到了除非解决这些问题,否则中国年轻人将继续对婚姻持犹豫态度。通过个人访谈的形式,展示了一些年轻人对婚姻的看法,他们更倾向于享受单身生活,不受婚姻和养育孩子的压力。
Mindmap
Keywords
💡结婚意愿
💡经济互助
💡生育
💡性
💡情感需求
💡社会趋势
💡性别比例失衡
💡彩礼
💡离婚率
💡个人主义
💡社会责任
Highlights
年轻人不愿意结婚已成为中国互联网上的热门话题。
2023年中国全年结婚登记对数为683万对,为1986年以来最低。
2013年是中国结婚登记的高峰年,此后结婚登记数逐年下降。
2023年5月20日,中国各地结婚登记数量较去年有显著下降。
即使在疫情结束后,人们的结婚意愿并未增加。
中国近年来新生儿数量急剧下降,2023年预计仅超过700万。
婚姻的传统功能包括经济互助、生育后代、性生活满足和情感需求。
现代社会中,婚姻的经济、生育和性生活功能已社会化,婚姻的功能主要转变为情感满足。
年轻人对婚姻的不情愿可能与他们对情感的不稳定和不可靠的看法有关。
中国实施了严格的计划生育政策,导致适婚年龄段的人口逐渐减少。
性别比例失衡导致婚姻竞争加剧,进而增加了结婚的成本。
现代社会中,养育孩子已从投资转变为消费,成本高昂。
婚前性行为的普遍和社会接受度的提高减少了婚姻作为性需求满足的必要性。
年轻人推迟结婚年龄,部分原因是对情感稳定性的不确定性。
中国年轻人对婚姻的犹豫不仅与普遍因素有关,还与特定的社会经济因素有关。
政府面临的挑战是如何改变年轻人不愿结婚的趋势,这在工业化国家是一个普遍现象。
建议政府尝试将婚姻与生育分离,并为非婚生家庭提供更多的社会支持和福利。
除非解决经济和社会不确定性问题,否则中国年轻人将继续对婚姻持观望态度。
Transcripts
Today, I'm going to talk about why young people nowadays are unwilling to get married
Recently, this topic has been trending on the Chinese internet
I randomly searched online for "not getting married" and "no marriage"
There are countless videos and posts online
"Yeah, why should I get married and have children?"
"Because once I get married, I'll become poor, right?"
"Do you know that many people from the '90s generation are left with nothing?"
"No getting married, no having children, no buying a house, no buying a car"
"So, with tens of thousands of yuan in my hand, isn't it better to spend it slowly?"
"Do you have a girlfriend?"
"No"
"Do you want to find a girlfriend?"
"I don't want to"
"Why don't you want to?"
"Because it's better not to engage in something that consumes time and energy"
"Consumes time and energy, but isn't it nice to have a girlfriend to have fun with?"
"No, it's not good"
"Why don't you get married then?"
"Get married? Don't you know it's not auspicious?"
"Women who get married in our hometown have a miserable life when they get old"
"Well, won't you not want kids then?"
"Kids? Don't mention kids to me. I'm allergic to kids"
"I went to the hospital to check for allergens"
"I can't even touch 3-year-old girls or 5-year-old boys"
"I get a rash on my body, it's scary"
"At 36, not getting married or having kids, how enjoyable is a life of living alone?"
"I can sleep in without anyone disturbing me"
"I can eat without considering others' tastes"
"Living alone, the house won't get messy"
"All my income can be spent as I please"
As you can see, not getting married has become a social trend among young people nowadays
Coincidentally, a few days ago, China's Ministry of Civil Affairs
released statistical data for the fourth quarter of last year
This data showed that the total number of marriages last year
in the whole country was 6.83 million couples
Divorces accounted for 2.1 million couples
This includes over a million remarriages
So, the number of first marriages is roughly 5 million couples
This number may be hard to grasp for everyone
Let me give you an introduction
China has been releasing the annual number of marriages since 1986
From 1986 until now, it's been almost 40 years
This number is the lowest since the availability of statistical data
2013 was the peak year for marriage in China
In that year, there were over 13 million marriages, but since then, it has been declining year by year
Initially, the decline was relatively stable
By 2019, it fell below 10 million for the first time
After that, it entered a steep decline
Each year, it has been dropping by over 10%
Last year, there were still 7.6 million couples
This year, it has dropped to 6.83 million couples
According to this trend, if it continues without change
it may soon fall below 5 million couples
What's even more critical is that
everyone knows that the past three years were affected by the pandemic
many people believe that the decline in the number of marriages in recent years is due to the pandemic
The pandemic caused isolation and lockdowns, making it impossible for people to get married
Therefore, many people expect that after the pandemic ends
there will be a surge in the number of marriages
And the fourth quarter of last year was the season when the pandemic ended
But look at the current numbers
The number of marriages in the last quarter of last year did not increase
It was even lower than the previous quarter
What does that indicate?
It means that even after the end of the pandemic, people's willingness to get married did not increase
Let me give you another number
This year's May 20th was the first May 20th after the end of the pandemic
last year's May 20th still had the pandemic and lockdowns
how many couples got married on this year's May 20th?
"The Paper" recently conducted a report on the marriage numbers
on May 20th in various provinces nationwide
Let me read it to you
In Jiangsu Province, on this year's May 20th
there were 11,156 marriages, a 25% decrease from last year
In Guangdong, there were 12,450 marriages, a 40% decrease from last year
In Sichuan, there were 16,000 marriages, a 36% decrease from last year
Hubei was even worse. On May 20th, there were 9,455 registered marriages
That's a total decrease of 46% compared to last year
In Hunan, there were only 4,576 registered marriages on May 20th, a 76% decrease from last year
Now, think about it
What does that indicate?
It means that the factor of the pandemic
should be negligible in young people's unwillingness to get married
That also means that young people nowadays really don't want to get married
Regardless of whether there's a pandemic or whether society is normal
they just won't get married
How terrible is it that young people are not getting married?
I have previously talked about this on a program
The number of newborns in China has been sharply declining in recent years
It has now dropped below 10 million
And this year, according to the numbers from pediatric hospitals
the total number of children being registered throughout the year is only 7.44 million
That also means
that the total number of newborns in China in 2023
is approximately just over 7 million
Some people have made comparisons with this number
It is lower than the number in 1946
It is even lower than during the period of the Anti-Japanese War and the Great Famine
Back then, there were still 9 million births per year
now we are in prosperous China
and the number of annual births is only slightly over 7 million
The key is to reverse the decline in birth numbers
First and foremost, we need these young people to get married
If they don't even get married, how can we talk about having children?
So, the issue of marriage is the prerequisite for the issue of childbirth
If young people don't get married, then having children is out of the question
Therefore, this issue is extremely important for China today
Let's analyze why young people today
are unwilling to get married
"Why are some girls going too far?"
"Always shouting about not wanting to marry or have children, as if you are so noble"
"You say you won't get married, then where will you find someone to tolerate you?"
"Who will take care of you?"
"how will you develop your housekeeping skills?"
"who will wash clothes and cook for the men?"
"Who will continue their family lineage?"
"You say you'll just indulge in eating, drinking, and having fun"
"But then you won't even have someone scolding you for being extravagant"
"after you doing your nails"
"You won't have anyone insulting your looks"
"Don't you want to worry about gynecological diseases?"
"Don't you want to be a wife catching a cheating husband?"
"If something unfortunate happens, how will the police identify the suspect?"
"A woman not getting married is like a bird without a watch"
"Like a monkey without a keyboard, like a fish without a motorcycle"
"You really are stupid"
"Hey, you better think it through."
"Don't end up when there is chaos in someone else's family"
"Someone gets a heart attack from tutoring children's homework, or her husband wants to transfer assets due to infidelity"
"You better not burst into laughter"
First, let's analyze the traditional institution of marriage
What functions does it serve in society?
I think there are several aspects to it
Firstly, the first function is economic assistance
It's because the cost of living alone is too high
The cost of living together for two people is almost the same
But there are two incomes
Even in ancient times, with the division of labor between men working outside and women taking care of the household
the woman's role at home, including raising children and doing housework
was actually a form of income
For men, it is also a very obvious benefit
when two people live together, the main aspect is economic assistance
This is the primary function of traditional marriage
The second major function is procreation
Chinese people have the concept and tradition of continuing the family lineage
But the prerequisite for continuing the family lineage is marriage
Because raising children is extremely challenging and time-consuming
It takes more than 20 years to raise them into adults
In traditional society, it is almost unimaginable
for one person to raise a child during that time
It requires both partners to participate
in raising the child in order to succeed
This is the second function
The third function is obtaining sex
In traditional society, sex was almost exclusively obtained through marriage
Sex outside of marriage was either not allowed by societal morals
or not permitted by law
when you have sexual desires, the best way is to get married
and have a stable sexual partner to fulfill your sexual needs
The fourth aspect
is satisfying our emotional needs for the opposite sex
When you meet someone you're interested in, you want to marry them
to be with them for a lifetime
This is a beautiful longing for human emotions
But here I want to mention
that emotional factors should be considered the least important in marriage
Throughout the history of marriage among humans
the history of emotionally-driven marriages does not exceed 100 years
In ancient societies, marriages were arranged by parents
and you didn't even meet the person before getting married
Where would emotions come into play?
Therefore, emotions are actually
unimportant in traditional marriages
But in modern marriages, they are important
In my opinion
the four social functions of marriage
are the four aspects I mentioned earlier
Next, we need to analyze
why young people nowadays are unwilling to get married
What variables have changed?
The first objective reason
is that China has implemented strict family planning in the past few years
As a result, the population of marriageable age is gradually declining
This is an objective fact
For example, those born in 1988, 1989 entered the marriageable age range
Currently, it is about 20 million per year
And this number is slowly decreasing year by year
There is also a number that people often overlook
which is the gender ratio
The gender ratio in China
became imbalanced due to family planning measures during a specific period
In the normal process of male-female birth ratio
males are slightly more than females
However, due to the preference for male children during the family planning era
the gender ratio became extremely skewed
It once reached 125 males to 100 females
Female infants were even killed at birth
As a result, there are significantly more males than females
In the year 2020, the numbers we released
among the marriageable population aged 20 to 40
showed that there are 17 million more men than women
it's quite alarming
It also means that
the competitiveness of marriage has greatly increased
We just talked about how traditional marriage was originally an economic mutual aid organization
where men and women live together
and the welfare levels of both parties improved
However, due to the shortage of women compared to men
the competitiveness in the process of entering marriage has become extremely intense
So this originally mutual assistance has turned into competition
and the degree of competition has become very high
Everyone knows about the bride price in recent years
In many rural areas
the amount has skyrocketed
From what I've heard
an amount of around 500,000 yuan has become quite normal nowadays
Especially in many impoverished areas
like Gansu, for example
where the income is not high
it is said that the bride price can easily reach several hundred thousand
What does that indicate?
It shows that the competitiveness of marriage has increased
Women are in high demand
and men want to get married
the families of women take advantage of the desire of men to get married
and desperately raise the bride price
So now you can see
that the unmarried status can actually be divided into two parts
Many men are "losing marriage"
"Losing marriage" means that you want to get married, but you can't, no one wants to marry you
For example, me
I want to get married, I really want to find a girlfriend
but on one hand, I'm busy with work
and on the other hand, I'm getting older and no one wants me
So I belong to the "losing marriage" category
And many women choose not to get married
When they say they don't want to get married, it means that they actually have potential partners
there are people who want to marry them, but they refuse
So what does this reflect?
Men and women
have different perceptions of benefits when entering the marriage process
Men gain more benefits from getting married
so they want to get married
But women gain fewer benefits after marriage
so they are reluctant to get married
Of course, men may feel a stronger sense of deprivation during divorce
while women may feel a weaker sense of deprivation during divorce
in conclusion, this has led to young people nowadays
being less willing to get married
Someone has mentioned
that in the past, marriage was about financial restructuring
but now it has become debt restructuring
"Not getting married, how great is it?"
"Not getting married means no need to buy a house"
"no burden of mortgage, savings from the bride price"
"One person eats well, the whole family is not hungry"
"No need to bear the pressure of providing for the family"
"Not getting married has five advantages"
"1. More freedom, no one stops you from going for a massage or foot spa"
"2. No frequent arguments over household chores"
"3. Can let loose and pursue one's interests"
"Without family obligations, it's easier to succeed in career"
"4. No worries about being cuckolded"
"5. you won't burden your parents when you're young"
"and you won't become a burden to your children when you're old"
The second factor
is raising children
Because in traditional society, raising children is actually an investment
Why is it an investment?
Because you think "raising children for old age"
If you have more children, when you grow old
you'll have more children who will take care of you, give you money
and provide warmth to you
So, you feel that having children and having grandchildren around you in old age is very fulfilling
But now it's different
Now raising children has turned into consumption
It has shifted from investment to consumption
Why is that?
Firstly, nowadays, once children get married
they don't really take care of you when you're old
At the same time, with the gradual establishment of social security systems
child-rearing is no longer solely a family matter
It has become socialized upbringing
You have a pension
So, the so-called traditional Chinese concept of filial piety
and the culture of providing for parents, is gradually changing
Young people are less likely to support you in old age
In this situation
what do you gain by raising children?
You only gain happiness in the process of raising children
But the cost is too high
According to some statistics
raising a child in a city like Beijing, Shanghai, or Guangzhou
from birth until college graduation, on average costs 2 million yuan
In smaller cities, although it may be slightly cheaper
the actual figures are still not low
To raise a child, you would need to spend at least a few hundred thousand
If you have two children, it would be two to three million
So, this is a very high cost for parents
And once you raise them, they fly away
When you get older, they don't take care of you either
Doesn't that purely become a consumer behavior?
So, this is a common change in all industrialized countries
The act of raising children has shifted from investment to consumption
That's why many people are unwilling to have children now
This is the fundamental reason
"What would you do if your daughter is mistreated in her in-laws' family?"
"My daughter wouldn't tolerate such mistreatment"
"So she won't get married"
"Can you accept that?"
"I can accept it, why not?"
"What's the point of carrying on the family lineage? Daughters can't carry on the lineage anyway, it doesn't matter"
"Then you'll have no one to accompany you when you're old"
"If you have a daughter, you'll have someone to accompany you?"
"If you have a son, you'll have someone to accompany you?"
"You can live in a better nursing home, just be independent"
"I think marriage is not necessarily good, and not getting married is not necessarily bad"
The third point, sex
In the past, you could only have sex if you were married
But now it's not necessary
In premarital relationships nowadays
as long as two people are in love, they basically live together
And outside of being in a relationship
there are more and more ways to have sexual experiences
This is an objective fact
in fact, many people no longer need marriage to fulfill their sexual needs
In this case
the motivation to enter the institution of marriage itself weakens
Furthermore
once you are married
you have a duty of loyalty to your partner
If you seek sexual relationships outside of that person
you become unethical, and you may even break the law
However, if you choose not to get married, you are relatively more free
If you don't have a stable boyfriend or girlfriend
it's actually not that difficult to fulfill your sexual needs in today's society
So, why do modern people
keep postponing the age of marriage?
This is also a very important reason
They are unwilling to enter the institution of marriage too early
Sexual partners have become the only object of affection
This is the third aspect
The fourth aspect is emotions
Throughout our human evolution
the longing for that kind of emotional connection with the opposite sex still exists
And people hope to build such emotional bonds
through the institution of marriage
be it creating a nest or a family
This aspect has probably remained unchanged
But here arises another issue
While the pursuit of emotions hasn't changed
emotions themselves are easily changeable
In the past, there was a saying about the "seven-year itch" in marriage
By the seventh year
you start finding faults with your partner no matter how you look at them
They used to be like a fairy, but now they've turned into a middle-aged woman
He used to be a handsome guy, but now he's become a greasy middle-aged man
think about it
maintaining the exclusivity of human emotions is actually quite challenging
The kind of everlasting love and devotion of the past
mostly happened without marriage
Didn't people often say in the past
that marriage is the grave of emotions, the grave of love?
When you're not married, everything seems great
But after a few years of dealing with household chores and responsibilities
you start finding your partner more and more disagreeable
In traditional marriages, as it was an economic mutual aid organization
as it involved reproduction and obtaining sexual satisfaction
it became extremely stable
You can look at families in the agricultural era
hardly any divorces occurred
But why is the divorce rate very high in modern society?
It's because the important foundations for maintaining marriage
that existed before no longer remain, leaving only emotions
Emotions, this thing, are too unreliable
In this situation, you will find that the divorce rate starts to increase significantly
The age of marriage begins to gradually postpone
"There are benefits to not getting married"
"Freedom, no one to control you"
"When you have a family, you argue about household chores and children"
"Can you accept that she doesn't want to get married to avoid these pressures?"
"Let them be"
Child has child's mindset"
"She can solve everything herself, why does she need a man?"
"It's not like before when we relied on our children for support in old age"
"It's useless to say that continuing the family lineage"
"As long as we live well"
"Not getting married means no one to accompany you"
"Don't you have friends outside?"
"A few close friends are better than a wife or husband"
"Develop more interests and hobbies"
What I just analyzed are common phenomena in industrialized countries
Not only in China, actually
Young people in Japan don't want to have children, and neither do young people in Korea
Young people in Taiwan, the US and Europe are also unwilling to reproduce
People are inherently self-interested
if they perceive not getting married as beneficial to themselves
then they are unwilling to get married
even though reproduction is beneficial to the entire society
But as an ordinary person, he actually has no obligation
to take responsibility for the development of the whole society
So you can see this in major developed countries around the world
Most young people nowadays are unwilling to get married
But the situation in China is slightly different
First of all
China is far from being as prosperous as the countries I mentioned earlier
The level of social security is also not at that level
there are still many people with very low income levels
why hasn't its economic mutual assistance function continued to work?
And starting from 2019 until now
there has been a cliff-like decline
It must not be just the reason I mentioned earlier
There must be special reasons
What are these special reasons?
I think there are several aspects to consider
First, as I mentioned earlier, this economic factor combined with competition
has resulted in young people, especially men, being unable to afford marriage
It's not that they don't want to get married, they simply can't afford it
Nowadays, many women demand that men, during the marriage process
not only pay a bride price
but also buy a house for the groom's family
For the man
just a few years after graduating from college
it is almost impossible to buy a house
in today's big cities
You may have to rely on your entire family's efforts to have a chance to afford this house
If your family cannot support you, then forget about it
That also means that even if you want to get married, you won't be able to
Because you don't have the financial means
In the past, we used to say "establish a family before having a career"
But now, women demand that you have a career before starting a family
this is a very important factor
The second aspect is that in recent years
young people may generally feel
that on one hand, the upward path has been blocked
On the other hand, there is great uncertainty in society as a whole
In this situation, they may find it difficult to take care of themselves
If they were to get married
and if they were to raise children
the risks would be even greater
many people, based on this risk aversion, are unwilling to get married
They always feel like they can barely manage on their own
But once it becomes a family
the responsibilities they would have to bear
seem overwhelming to them
"Why don't I have children?"
"Not infertility? Absolutely not"
"As of now, my health indicators are barely normal"
"I don't have children simply because I can't afford to"
"I can't afford to raise them, let alone raise them well"
"If you suggest adding two chopsticks, feeding them a bowl of porridge and sending them to the fields for farming"
"then we have more than enough"
"But when it comes to safety, pollution-free, scientifically balanced main and supplementary food"
"with vitamins, nutrients, and preschool tutoring"
"learning piano, dancing, English, painting, swimming, and fitness"
"attending private schools where teachers don't tutor us at home"
"If they can't get into top universities, we send them abroad for studies"
"After they return, I'll prepare their bride price and buy them a house"
"A large two-bedroom apartment, a small car with four wheels"
"And give birth to a big, chubby grandchild for me"
"I truly can't afford it. Did someone force you to raise them like this?"
"Who forced you to do it?"
"If you can't afford private schools, go to public schools. If you can't learn the piano, learn a different skill. Isn't that enough?"
"Not enough? Who's forcing me?"
"If others are studying, why aren't you studying? If others are working hard, why aren't you?"
"There's an old saying"
"Do you want your child to start at a disadvantage?"
Lastly, I want to mention
The government actually faces great difficulties in trying to change this trend
Just as I have mentioned before
If you want to reduce the birth rate, it's not difficult
You just need to take strict measures and enforce birth control on them
But now, if you want people to have more children, it's extremely difficult
If you want these young people who are unwilling to get married to consider marriage
It's very challenging
Especially after the development of industrialization
Human marriage patterns have gradually changed
So, under this trend
It's really extremely difficult to significantly increase the desire of young people to get married
Do you think subsidies would work?
Do tax methods work?
If someone is unwilling to get married, it's hard to force them
So, I have several suggestions for the Chinese government in this regard
Firstly, try to separate marriage and childbirth as much as possible
Currently, there are statistics
In countries like France, 40% of newborns are born to unmarried families
They are not born into households with a father and a mother
They have completely separated the two
Because if you don't separate them, it means
The actual birth numbers would be even more abysmal
as a last resort, this measure was adopted
In a society, special care should be given to families with non-marital births
Not only should there be no discrimination, but also more care and welfare should be provided
I think the Chinese government can do this
They should encourage non-marital births
You don't have to get married
But even during the process of not getting married, you should be encouraged to have children
The second aspect
Is to provide more social hope to the current young people
If you can't make young people
feel that this is a hopeful society
They won't get married, they won't have children
the whole family has transitioned from being investment-oriented
and mutual support-oriented to being consumption-oriented
marriage itself has become a form of consumption
And for consumption, they must feel
they have sufficient hope for the future, only then will they dare to consume
If there is no hope for the future, they won't dare to consume
Including marriage, which is a form of consumption, they won't dare to consume
as for whether this can be achieved
I don't know
We can only wait for this society to give us such an answer
But what I want to say is
If this trend doesn't change
Then the entire future of China in the next 10 or 20 years
will be very pessimistic
Alright, that's all I have to say today. Thank you, everyone
"How enjoyable is life without getting married"
"I'm 36 years old this year, unmarried and childless"
"Living in a rental apartment of just a dozen square meters"
"No pressure of car loans or mortgage, no need for bride price"
"And not afraid of others saying I'm eating well while my whole family is not hungry"
"No need to bear the pressure of supporting a family"
In the past year, the total number of marriages in China dropped to 6.83 million couples, the lowest recorded since statistical data began in 1986. Moreover, over the past five years, it has consistently declined by nearly 10% annually. This sharp decline is not related to the pandemic; young people simply do not want to get married
"I'm turning 31 soon, still unmarried and childless"
"And I will never get married in this lifetime"
"Do you know how enjoyable life is without getting married?"
"No mother-in-law conflicts, no need to worry about cheating, no need to raise children"
"Sleep until naturally waking up in the morning"
"Earning a monthly salary of 30,000 in Beijing"
Traditional marriage served four functions: economic interaction, procreation, a channel for sexual expression, and emotional fulfillment. In modern society, the first three needs have been highly socialized. Therefore, the function of marriage is reduced to solely obtaining emotional fulfillment. However, emotions are both fickle and unreliable. Consequently, young people in modern industrialized countries, as a general trend, are increasingly unwilling to get married. This is a global phenomenon
"How enjoyable is life without getting married?"
"No need to buy a house if you don't get married"
"No burden of mortgage, all the bride price saved"
"Eating well while being alone"
"No pressure of supporting a family"
"There are five benefits to not getting married, first being freedom."
In China, the decline in marriage rates over the past five to six years can be attributed not only to universal factors but also to some specific reasons. These include intense competition in marriage and a pervasive sense of hopelessness among young people. Unless these issues are addressed, Chinese youth will continue to hesitate when it comes to marriage
"Do you have a girlfriend?"
"No," "Do you want to find a girlfriend then?"
"No", "why not?"
"Because I don't want to engage in something that consumes time and energy"
"Consumes time and energy"
"But wouldn't it be nice to have a girlfriend to have fun with?"
"No, it wouldn't"
本期英文字幕:毛豆腐
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