What The Ultimate Study On Happiness Reveals

Summary

This video explores the keys to a happy life, debunking the common belief that wealth and success alone bring happiness. It delves into a Harvard study, spanning 85 years, revealing that relationships and physical health are vital for long-term happiness and well-being. Key findings show that quality relationships reduce stress, enhance health, and even protect cognitive functions. Despite societal trends towards isolation, the video emphasizes the importance of cultivating meaningful connections and maintaining good health as practices for a fulfilling life.

Takeaways

• 💰 Many people believe that money is essential for happiness, but studies suggest this is not entirely true.
• 🎓 A significant percentage of college freshmen aspire to be wealthy and successful in their careers.
• 📉 Lottery winners often do not experience long-term happiness increases; some may even become more miserable.
• 🧠 Memory is unreliable; hence, recalling past happiness is not a dependable method for studying happiness.
• 📊 The Harvard Study of Adult Development, the longest study of its kind, reveals that good relationships are key to happiness and health.
• ❤️ Strong social connections are linked to a 50% increased likelihood of survival, while loneliness can be as harmful as smoking or obesity.
• 👩‍❤️‍👨 The quality of close relationships, rather than the number of social interactions, is crucial for well-being.
• 🧓 Secure relationships in older age help maintain sharper memories and reduce the risk of cognitive decline.
• 💪 Taking care of physical health through exercise, diet, and preventive care significantly impacts longevity and well-being.
• 📉 Social engagement has decreased over the years, with technology often replacing in-person interactions, leading to increased loneliness.

Q & A

What is the main focus of the video script?

The main focus of the video script is to explore the factors that contribute to a happy life, with a particular emphasis on the role of money, career success, and relationships.

What percentage of college freshmen in the 2018 survey aimed to be successful in their career and become rich?

In the 2018 survey, about 55% of college freshmen wanted to be successful in their career, and 83% reported that they wanted to become rich.

How does the script suggest people are not good at judging what will make them happy?

The script suggests that people's memories are unreliable and reconstructed, which means they only detect, encode, and store bits and pieces of their experiences, leading to inaccurate judgments about what makes them happy.

What is the significance of the Harvard Study of Adult Development mentioned in the script?

The Harvard Study of Adult Development is significant because it is the longest study of human development ever conducted, providing valuable insights into the factors that contribute to a healthy and happy life over time.

What were the two initial separate studies that eventually merged into the Harvard Study of Adult Development?

The two initial studies were one that followed 268 young men from Harvard and another that studied 456 boys from Boston's poorest and most disadvantaged families, both aimed at understanding development and predicting who does well as they grow up.

What does the script reveal about the impact of physical health on happiness and longevity?

The script reveals that taking care of one's physical health, such as eating well, exercising regularly, and avoiding harmful habits, has significant benefits for both longevity and maintaining good health, contributing to a happier life.

How does the script describe the relationship between social connections and health?

The script describes that having stronger social connections is associated with a 50% increased likelihood of survival and that being lonely can be as harmful to health as smoking or obesity, increasing the risk of various diseases.

What is the role of relationships in protecting our cognitive health according to the script?

According to the script, being in secure relationships, especially in one's 80s, helps keep memories sharper for longer, while feeling lonely can lead to a faster cognitive decline and an increased risk of dementia.

What does the script suggest about the importance of the quality of relationships over their quantity?

The script suggests that it's not the number of people one knows or is married to, but the quality of close relationships that matters for happiness and health. Even a bad marriage can be worse for health than getting divorced.

How does the script address the changing nature of social engagement due to technology?

The script addresses that technology has changed how we interact and communicate, often replacing in-person connections with online ones of lower quality, leading to decreased social engagement and increased loneliness.

What advice does the script provide for cultivating happier and more connected lives?

The script advises making relationships a daily practice, similar to physical fitness, by regularly taking actions to stay connected with those we care about, such as talking on the phone, going for walks, or having coffee together.

Outlines

00:00

💰 The Pursuit of Wealth and Happiness

This paragraph explores the common belief that wealth and success are key to a happy life. It starts by highlighting the importance people place on earning money and achieving a high social status. The speaker humorously admits a preference for crying on a yacht over a Subaru, emphasizing the allure of luxury. A 2018 survey of college freshmen is cited, showing a majority's desire for career success and wealth. The paragraph then poses a critical question: whether these achievements actually translate to happiness, setting the stage for an exploration of happiness research.

05:01

🧠 The Science of Happiness: Memory and Longitudinal Studies

The focus shifts to the scientific study of happiness, noting the unreliability of people's predictions about what will make them happy, as illustrated by the fleeting joy of lottery winners. The paragraph delves into the challenges of studying happiness, such as the limitations of reconstructed memories. It introduces a landmark study that has been tracking individuals' lives since 1938, now overseen by Robert Waldinger. This study, which began at Harvard, has followed participants from various backgrounds, providing deep insights into human development, health, and well-being over decades.

10:01

🏃‍♂️ Physical Health and the Power of Relationships

The paragraph reveals findings from the long-term study, emphasizing the significance of physical health and positive relationships for a happy and long life. It discusses the benefits of regular exercise, as supported by various studies, which show reduced mortality rates and improved cognitive health. The surprising discovery is the profound impact of relationships on happiness and health, with strong social connections linked to increased survival rates and the protective effects of marriage against cognitive decline.

15:03

🤗 Loneliness: A Modern Epidemic and Its Health Risks

This section discusses the rise of loneliness and its severe health implications, comparing its dangers to smoking and obesity. It references a meta-analysis by Julianne Holt-Lunstad that quantifies the risks associated with social isolation and poor relationships, such as increased chances of heart disease and stroke. The paragraph also addresses the growing concern over loneliness, with the U.S. Surgeon General declaring it a public health epidemic and highlighting the UK's appointment of a minister to tackle the issue.

20:03

👥 The Importance of Quality Relationships for Well-being

The paragraph examines the quality of relationships over quantity, using data from the Harvard study to argue that the strength of marital and close relationships is a better predictor of happiness and health at older ages than physical health indicators. It suggests that relationships act as emotion and stress regulators, helping to mitigate the negative effects of chronic stress on the body. The section concludes with a call to action, encouraging people to spend more time with loved ones to prevent the detrimental health effects of isolation.

📉 The Decline of Social Interaction and the Impact of Technology

This paragraph discusses the decline in social engagement due to technological changes, noting a significant decrease in the time spent with friends from 2003 to 2020. It acknowledges that both introverts and extroverts require human connection and cites studies that link loneliness and social isolation to a higher risk of premature death. The paragraph also reflects on the findings from the Harvard study, which indicate that the happiest individuals prioritized relationships over achievements and material success.

💼 Achievements, Money, and the Search for Happiness

The final paragraph examines the role of achievements and money in happiness. It references studies that show no significant increase in emotional well-being beyond an annual income of $75,000, except for the happiest individuals who continue to benefit from higher earnings. The section concludes by emphasizing the importance of relationships, meaningful work, and financial security in achieving happiness, and encourages viewers to cultivate positive relationships as a daily practice for long-term well-being.

Keywords

💡Happiness

Happiness is a state of well-being and contentment. In the video, it is the central theme, with various aspects explored that contribute to a happy life. The script discusses how money, relationships, and physical health are perceived to influence happiness, and studies are referenced to analyze their actual impact.

💡Wealth

Wealth refers to an abundance of valuable resources or material possessions. The video script mentions wealth as a commonly perceived aspect of a happy life, with participants expressing the desire to earn at least a million dollars. However, the script also questions whether wealth truly equates to happiness, citing studies on lottery winners to illustrate the complexity of the relationship between wealth and happiness.

💡Physical Health

Physical health denotes the state of being free from illness or injury. The video emphasizes its importance for a happy life, highlighting that taking care of one's physical health through exercise, diet, and avoiding harmful habits like smoking and excessive drinking can significantly contribute to longevity and well-being.

💡Social Connections

Social connections refer to the relationships and interactions one has with others. The script underscores the significance of strong social bonds for happiness and health, citing research that shows people with better social connections have a higher likelihood of survival and better mental and physical health outcomes.

💡Loneliness

Loneliness is the subjective feeling of being alone or disconnected from others. The video discusses loneliness as a public health issue, with research indicating it can be as harmful as smoking or obesity. The script contrasts loneliness with the positive effects of social connections, emphasizing the importance of addressing this growing problem.

💡Exercise

Exercise is any activity that increases physical effort, enhancing fitness and health. The video script highlights exercise as a key component of maintaining physical health, with studies showing that even small amounts of daily exercise can significantly reduce mortality rates and improve cognitive health.

💡Cognitive Decline

Cognitive decline refers to the deterioration of cognitive abilities, such as memory and thinking skills. The script mentions that physical activity can protect against cognitive decline, while social isolation and loneliness can accelerate it, emphasizing the interplay between physical health, mental well-being, and social engagement.

💡Harvard Study of Adult Development

The Harvard Study of Adult Development is a longitudinal study that has been tracking participants' lives since 1938. The video script uses this study as a primary source of evidence, illustrating the long-term impact of relationships and physical health on happiness and well-being.

💡Emotional Well-being

Emotional well-being is the state of one's emotional health, including the ability to feel positive emotions and cope with negative ones. The video script references a study by Kahneman and Deaton, suggesting that emotional well-being does not improve beyond an annual income of approximately $75,000, challenging the notion that more money inherently leads to greater happiness.

💡Relationship Quality

Relationship quality refers to the depth, satisfaction, and positivity of one's connections with others. The script argues that it's not just the quantity of social connections that matter for happiness, but rather the quality of those relationships, especially in terms of providing emotional support and companionship.

💡Stress Regulation

Stress regulation is the process of managing and coping with stress. The video script suggests that relationships serve as a form of stress regulation, helping individuals recover from daily stressors and maintain emotional balance, which in turn contributes to overall happiness and health.

Highlights

The video explores the link between money, career success, and happiness, questioning if these factors truly contribute to a happy life.

A survey reveals that a majority of college freshmen aspire to be successful and wealthy, indicating a common belief in the importance of financial status.

Lottery winners, despite initial happiness, may not experience long-term increases in happiness, suggesting money isn't a guaranteed path to joy.

The unreliability of human memory when recalling past happiness indicates the need for longitudinal studies to accurately measure life satisfaction.

The Harvard Study of Adult Development, initiated in 1938, is the longest study of human development, providing deep insights into life and health.

Physical health practices such as diet, exercise, and avoiding substance abuse are linked to longevity and maintaining good health in old age.

Exercise has been shown to reduce mortality risk and improve cognitive health, emphasizing its importance in daily life.

Relationships, rather than wealth, are found to be a significant factor in happiness and health, contradicting common assumptions.

Social connections are associated with a higher likelihood of survival and reduced risk of various diseases, highlighting the health benefits of strong relationships.

Loneliness is compared to smoking and obesity in terms of its negative health impacts, underlining the importance of addressing social isolation.

The rise in loneliness is declared a public health epidemic, with young people being the most affected and in need of social connection.

The quality of close relationships, rather than the quantity of social contacts, is what contributes to happiness and health.

Cognitive decline is slower in those with secure relationships, suggesting that emotional bonds can protect mental faculties.

The role of relationships as emotion and stress regulators is suggested as a mechanism for their health benefits.

Spending time with loved ones is recommended as a simple yet effective way to improve happiness and health.

The trend of decreased social engagement and increased reliance on technology is identified as a potential threat to social connection and well-being.

The happiest individuals in the Harvard study prioritized relationships over achievements, indicating a shift in what is valued in life.

Income levels and happiness show a complex relationship, with higher incomes potentially increasing happiness but only up to a certain point.

The video concludes that cultivating relationships should be viewed as a practice, similar to physical fitness, for long-term happiness and health.

Transcripts

- This video is about one of the most important questions:

what leads to a happy life?

- Realistically, money.

- Being wealthy is definitely a big aspect of it.

- To save a lot of money.

- Money. - Money.

- Earning money.

- It's very important to be rich.

- It's easy for people

to say they don't care about having money

and that money can't buy happiness,

but that's really not true.

- 'Cause I would rather cry on a yacht

than in a like a Subaru.

(both laugh)

- [Derek] Clearly, having a successful career

and financial wealth are important to people.

Is there a number in mind? Something you wanna get to?

- At least a million.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

- In a survey from 2018

of around a hundred thousand college freshmen,

about 55% said they wanted to be successful in their career

and 83% reported that they wanted to become rich.

But do these accomplishments really increase happiness?

Well, that's what I wanna find out in this video.

But how do you study what makes people happy?

Well, you can ask them.

What's gonna make you happy?

- Um. - Uh.

- Uh. - Uh.

- Ooh.

- [Derek] But people aren't really good

at judging what will make them happy.

Winning the lottery seems like it should make you happy.

- What!? (sister screams)

What!? What!?

- [Derek] But numerous studies on lottery winners

find that after the initial surge of happiness wears off,

many are no happier than the rest of us.

Some are, in fact, more miserable than they were beforehand.

- 'Cause you don't see as many people as you used to see.

Obviously, you become slightly isolated,

I think in some ways.

- Yeah, I agree.

- Another problem is that people's memories aren't reliable.

- We only detect, encode and store in our brains

bits and pieces of the entire experience in front of us.

It's called reconstructed memories.

It happens to us

in all the aspects of our lives all the time.

- Most studies on happiness find older people

and ask them to recall what made them happy.

But as we've just seen, memory is unreliable.

So a better way to conduct a study

would be to follow people throughout their entire lives,

capturing the choices they make

and how those affect their happiness.

That is really hard to do.

But there is one study like this

that's been running since 1938.

Now, 85 years is a long time to run a study

so it has been passed down

from one generation of researchers to the next.

It's currently run by its fourth director, Robert Waldinger.

What is the claim to fame then of the study?

- You know, the claim to fame is that it is,

as far as we know, the longest study of human development

that's ever been done.

The longest study of any depth.

These are studies that take deep dives into people's lives

and their mental and physical health.

- [Derek] The study actually began as two separate studies

by two groups of Harvard researchers

that didn't know about each other.

The first group followed 268 young men from Harvard

to find out how they would develop into early adulthood.

- So of course,

if you wanna study normal young adult development,

you study all white guys from Harvard, right?

(Derek laughs)

You know, it's one of those limitations.

- [Derek] The second group studied 456 boys

from middle school onwards

from Boston's poorest and most disadvantaged families.

- So there were these two studies,

both meant to be studies of what goes right in development

and how we predict who does well as they grow up.

- Eventually, the two studies merged into one:

The Harvard Study of Adult Development.

At the start of the study, the participants were interviewed

and received extensive physical examinations.

And as they grew, they entered all walks of life.

Some of them became bricklayers and doctors

and factory workers and lawyers,

and one even became president of the United States.

(presidential music)

Every two years, researchers ask them questions

about their lives.

Like, "If you could stop working without loss of income,

would you, what would you do instead?

How often do you feel isolated from others?

True or false, life has more pain than pleasure."

And other questions about their marriage,

career, friendships, and their physical and mental health.

While the study started with just 724 participants,

over time, their spouses and children

were also included in the study.

So how many people are we talking about in total

who have been part of the study?

- Between 2,500 and 3,000 people altogether in the study.

- [Derek] And as technology improved,

so did the methods of data collection.

- We now draw blood from DNA.

You know, DNA wasn't even imagined in 1938.

We measure messenger RNA, DNA methylation,

we bring people into our laboratory,

we deliberately stress them out

and then see how quickly they recover from stress.

Looking at heart rate variability, for example,

looking at cortisol deposited in hair,

because that seems to be a long-term measure

of circulating cortisol.

But all of these new methods are in the service

of studying the same big phenomena

of human wellbeing.

- So what do 85 years of research

across entire human lives teach us

about a healthy and happy life?

- Two huge takeaways really.

One is no surprise.

It's that if you take care of your physical health,

it has huge benefits, not just for your longevity,

but for how long you stay healthy.

Eating well, getting regular exercise,

not abusing alcohol or drugs, not smoking,

getting preventive healthcare,

exercise is hugely important.

- [Derek] A Taiwanese study looked at the medical data

of 416,000 healthy people between 1996 and 2008.

Eight years later, they followed up with each person

to look at the link between exercise and mortality.

They found that people who exercised just 15 minutes a day

had a 14% reduced risk of dying,

and a three year longer life expectancy.

Every additional 15 minutes of exercise

decreased the risk of dying by an extra 4%.

A large meta-analysis from 2008 confirms

that people who are physically active

have a reduced risk of dying

during the timeframes investigated in each study.

Exercise also protects our cognitive health.

A meta-analysis from 2014 found

that participants with higher levels of physical activity

had a 35% reduced risk of cognitive decline

and a 14% reduced risk of dementia.

- And then the big surprising finding is, relationships,

not just keeping us happier,

but keeping us healthier and helping us live longer.

- It's not just the Harvard study.

There's now a whole list of studies

that show the importance of relationships

to human happiness and health.

They teach us three main lessons.

The first is that relationships are great for our health.

In 2010, researchers looked across 148 studies

with a total of more than 300,000 participants.

They found that, on average,

people with stronger social connections

had a 50% increased likelihood of survival

for any given year.

Being married, in particular,

has a large impact on how long people live.

- There's one study, I think it's pretty well respected,

that suggests that married men

live 12 years longer on average than unmarried men

and married women live seven years longer on average

than unmarried women.

Marriage is always a better deal for men on all parameters

than it is for women. (Derek laughs)

And it's not because you have a marriage license, right?

It's because people living together

in an intimate partnership

tend to keep each other healthier.

You have somebody who's kind of watching,

looking out for you.

It's a very real, concrete effect.

- If feeling well-connected to others

makes us happier, healthier, and extends our lives,

then what happens if we feel disconnected?

- There's a researcher, Julianne Holt-Lunstad,

out of the University of Utah,

who did a meta-analysis of a whole slew of studies

of the physical effects of loneliness.

And her calculation was that being lonely

is as dangerous to your health

as smoking half a pack of cigarettes a day,

or as dangerous as being obese.

- [Derek] Feeling disconnected from others

also makes you more prone to disease.

A large meta-analysis from 2016

found that poor social relationships

were associated with a 29% increase in risk of heart disease

and a 32% increase in risk of stroke.

- So these have real sort of quantifiable consequences

when we look at studies of thousands of people.

- One caveat is that most studies

on the health effects of loneliness

focus on people aged 50 and older.

(clock ticking)

And loneliness is on the rise.

- The U.S. Surgeon General today

declared a new public health epidemic in America.

Loneliness.

- We're now finding that one in two adults

report measurable levels of loneliness

and it turns out that young people are most affected.

And here's why this is so concerning.

It's because we've realized

that loneliness is more than just a bad feeling.

It has real consequences

for our mental and physical health.

- The UK has appointed a minister of loneliness.

Many, many countries are concerned

about this breakdown in social connection.

- A question about loneliness,

like, what does that look like?

Because, obviously, everyone experiences

some periods of loneliness.

So you know, when does it become sort of really detrimental

and how do we define that?

- Well, loneliness is different from being alone, right?

So you can be alone and quite content,

and many people are, in fact.

The ability to be content when you're alone

is quite a skill and it's a wonderful ability.

Loneliness is that subjective experience

of being less connected to people than you wanna be.

And that's why, you know, you can be lonely in a crowd.

We're all on a spectrum between extroversion,

you know, wanting lots of people in our lives,

and introversion, actually needing a lot of solitude

and not wanting a lot of people,

a lot of people are stressful for introverts.

And what we know is that neither one is healthier, right?

Like introverts are perfectly healthy.

They just may need one or two really solid relationships

and don't want a lot more people.

Nothing wrong with that at all.

Whereas extroverts may want lots of people in their lives.

- [Derek] So the second lesson is

that it's not how many people you know or see,

or even whether you're married or not,

because a bad marriage can be worse

for your health than getting divorced.

Instead, it's about the quality

of your close relationships that matters.

- When we'd followed all the original people

out to their 80s we said,

"Okay, what data actually are the best predictors

at age 50 of who's gonna be happy

and healthy at age 80 as opposed to sick or dead?"

And we thought we were gonna be looking

at blood pressure and cholesterol level at age 50

as the strongest predictors.

It was their relationships.

It was particularly their satisfaction

with their marital relationships

that was the strongest predictor.

- And relationships don't just keep us happier

and physically healthier,

they also protect our brains.

People who are in secure relationships in their 80s,

where they feel that they can rely on the other person,

find that their memories stay sharper for longer.

And people who feel lonely,

well, their memories fade quicker.

A study of retired U.S. adults found

that the rate of cognitive decline

was 20% higher over 10 years for those who felt lonely.

A meta-analysis from 2018 further confirms

the detrimental effects of loneliness,

finding that it also increased the risk of dementia.

But there's still a big open question:

what is it about the relationships

that makes them particularly healthful or helpful?

- The best hypothesis,

for which there's some pretty decent research now,

is that relationships are emotion regulators.

They're stress regulators.

So stressful things happen every day

to many of us, right?

So then what happens?

Well, the body goes into fight-or-flight mode,

blood pressure goes up,

respirations become more rapid,

circulating stress hormone levels rise.

But then the body is meant to go back to equilibrium

after that normal fight-or-flight response

when we face a challenge.

If I can come home and there's somebody here to talk to,

I can literally feel my body calm down.

What we are pretty sure happens

is that people who are isolated, that they're more likely

to stay in a kind of chronic fight-or-flight mode.

And that what that means is

that they have higher levels of circulating cortisol,

higher levels of chronic inflammation,

and that those things gradually wear away body systems.

So that's how, for example,

chronic stress can predict coronary artery disease,

but also arthritis and also type-two diabetes

because of this common mechanism

that breaks down multiple body systems.

- The key to preventing this breakdown is simple.

Just spend a little more time

with the people you care about.

Unfortunately, we seem to be doing the exact opposite.

Before going into why we're doing the exact opposite,

this part of the video was sponsored by BetterHelp.

There are many things

that can negatively impact our happiness.

It could be stress or fear or a clinical mental health issue

like depression or anxiety.

But regardless of which one it is,

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Just whatever's the most comfortable version

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And it's easy to sign up, there's a link in the description.

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Clicking on that link both helps support this channel

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If you feel like you could benefit from talking to someone,

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or click that link in the description below.

So I want to thank BetterHelp

for sponsoring this part of the video.

And now, back to the importance of relationships.

There is an alarming trend in our society.

- [Newsreader] Social engagement with friends decreased

from 60 minutes a day in 2003

to just 20 minutes a day in 2020.

- The technology has fundamentally changed

how we interact with one another

and how we communicate with one another

and, unfortunately, has often replaced

what used to be rich in-person connections

with online connections, which often are of lower quality.

- Now, you may say you're an introvert

and you don't need to spend much time with people

to feel good.

And while it's true that introverts and extroverts

need different amounts of social stimulation,

both need human connection.

In 2015, Holt-Lunstad and her colleagues

looked at the data of 70 independent studies

with more than 3 million total participants.

Similar to other studies,

they found that the subjective feeling of loneliness

increased the risk of premature death by 26%.

But they also looked at

the objective measure of social isolation,

how much time you're actually spending with other people.

And they found that social isolation

increased the risk of premature death by 29%.

And unfortunately, introverts are more at risk

of being socially isolated.

Just like many young people today,

many participants from the Harvard study

also believed that money and achievement

were what they should go after to have a good life.

But what this study and plenty of others show

is that the people who were the happiest

were those that leaned into their relationships

with their partner, friends, family, and community.

And when they were in their 80s

the researchers asked them, what are you most proud of

and what is your biggest regret?

- Many people said that they were proudest

of something to do with their relationships.

So it could be, "I was a good boss, I was a good parent,

I was a good friend, I was a good mentor."

Nobody said, "I made a fortune," right?

Nobody even said, you know, "I won the Nobel Prize,"

which a few people did.

It wasn't about those badges of achievement, right,

that we think of as, "Oh, that's what we gotta get

to feel like we've had a meaningful life."

Everybody looking back mentioned their relationships.

The biggest regret was particularly among the men,

'cause this was the World War II generation.

They said, "I wish I hadn't spent so much time at work,

I wish I had spent more time with the people I care about."

- So what about our original question?

Do achievements and money really make us happy?

Well, according to the Harvard study,

badges of achievement do not necessarily make us happier,

but doing meaningful work can.

And what about money? Does that make us happier?

Well, there's a famous study from 2010

by Daniel Kahneman and Angus Deaton

that found that above an income of around $75,000 a year,

there is no improvement whatever

in the measures of emotional wellbeing.

But 11 years later,

Matthew Killingsworth studied data

on 33,000 employed U.S. adults

and he found that higher incomes

corresponded to higher levels of wellbeing.

So he wrote, "There was no evidence

for an experienced wellbeing plateau above $75,000 a year,

contrary to some influential past research."

In 2022, Kahneman and Killingsworth set out

to resolve the conflict with Barbara Mellers as a mediator.

When they analyzed Killingsworth's data,

they discovered an interesting pattern,

depending on how happy people were relative to others,

earning more resulted in different increases in happiness.

For each income level,

they divided people into groups based on their happiness,

low, medium, high, and so on.

And they found that below a threshold

of roughly a hundred thousand dollars a year,

a higher income was associated

with more happiness for all groups.

But if you go above that threshold,

then for the unhappiest group,

a further increase is not associated with more happiness.

However, for all the happier groups,

higher incomes do seem to lead to more happiness.

And the real twist is

that those who are the happiest to start with

stand to gain the most with increasing income.

Relationships, meaningful work,

and money all play a role in our happiness.

So why can it be so hard

to realize just how important relationships are?

- You know, if you think about it,

relationships have been there

since before we have memory, right?

So they're like the air we breathe,

we take 'em for granted.

So you don't think about that as something you cultivate

in order to make yourself happy.

We don't think about that at all.

And yet, when we study it scientifically,

we find that that turns out to be an enormous predictor

of happiness as well as physical health.

- What's gonna make you happy?

- Um. - Uh.

- Uh. - Uh.

- Um. - Uh.

- Being wealthy is definitely a big aspect of it.

But that loving family is kind of like the foundation of it.

You know what I mean? - Realistically, money.

But like building deep connections

with people are what's going

to make me happy. - [Derek] That's awesome.

- Having like good relationships with other people.

- You raise a family.

- Have a family and provide.

- Friends and family.

- Seeing my family happy, that's all I really care about.

- Giving back to the community

where you came from, the world.

- A strong family base just to come home to every night.

- Yeah. I wanna get married, have a ton of kids.

I want to- - How many is a ton?

- Probably like five-ish, six.

- That's a- - As many as I can afford.

(Derek laughs) So.

- In fact, when I interviewed people,

I was pleasantly surprised

to see how many identified the importance of relationships.

So if you could give people advice

on what to start doing today to start being happier,

what suggestions would you make?

- To think about it as analogous with physical fitness,

if you go out today, you don't come home

and say, "I'm done.

I don't ever have to do that again," right?

It's like a practice, right?

That the people who were best at relationships

were the people who made it a practice

day after day, week after week,

to stay connected to the people they cared about.

You know, to talk on the phone, to go for walks,

to have coffee, to do whatever, to play basketball.

The people who took those actions again and again regularly

were the people who stayed very connected

and stayed happy that way.

So what we propose is

that this is a practice we can cultivate

and that there are tiny actions that people can take.

We have many stories of people

who thought that they were no good at relationships,

that they were never gonna have happy lives.

And then it changed.

And many times it changed when they didn't expect it.

So like, we have a story about one man

who really didn't have a good marriage

and was kind of distant from his kids,

didn't have any friends.

And then when he retired,

he joined a gym and he found this group of friends

that became, for the first time, a kind of tribe for him.

And that's just one example

of how our lives take these twists and turns

that we usually can't predict,

that we don't expect.

And many of those turns are in positive directions.

The message that the science tells us

is don't give up on this aspect of your life.

'cause many things can change at any age.

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