Tammy's Story - People Like Us episode #5

People Like Us - The CNAM Channel

30 Mar 201507:52

Summary

TLDRThe transcript follows Tammy Crabtree, a struggling single mother in a small Ohio town. Embarrassed by her living conditions, she expresses her frustration over the state of her home, her strained relationship with her mother, and the judgment she faces from others. Despite working hard at Burger King and walking over ten miles to work, she feels judged by her community and even her children. Her son distances himself due to their socioeconomic status, while she dreams of improving her life, aspiring to attend college and provide a better future for her children.

Takeaways

😔 The speaker feels embarrassed about their living situation, including the condition of their trailer and yard, and is hesitant to let friends know where they live.
😊 Despite the issues with their living space, the speaker and their mother both like living there.
😕 The speaker appreciates that someone helps clean the house while they work, but dislikes it when things are moved out of place.
😟 The speaker avoids introducing their mother to people due to concerns about her appearance, feeling that people judge more by looks than by character.
🏚️ The living space, including the kitchen, lacks essentials like a furnace, and there is a lot of junk around, which is difficult to organize.
😒 The speaker and their mother argue frequently about cleaning and responsibilities, with the speaker expressing frustration about their mother's laziness.
👷 The speaker's father worked hard for 27 years, and the speaker is proud of him and wants to make him proud by working and providing for their own children.
🚶 The speaker walks over 10 miles to work at Burger King because they don’t have a car or a driver's license, and they feel judged by others for their circumstances.
🎓 The speaker dreams of going to college and becoming a school teacher, despite criticism from friends who think they should stay home and rely on welfare.
👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 The speaker feels a divide between themselves and their children, and their son acts as though he's better than the rest of the family due to his appearance and lifestyle.

Q & A

Why does the speaker feel embarrassed about where they live?
-The speaker feels embarrassed about living in a trailer with a messy yard, which they worry will be judged by others, particularly their friends.
How does the speaker feel about their mother's appearance?
-The speaker feels embarrassed about their mother's appearance because she doesn't 'fix herself up,' which the speaker believes people judge more than behavior.
What is the relationship between the speaker and their mother like?
-The speaker and their mother have a tense relationship, arguing frequently. The speaker criticizes their mother for not helping clean or straighten up, while the mother suggests moving as a solution.
What does the speaker appreciate about their partner?
-The speaker appreciates that their partner helps clean the house while they are at work, although they dislike when things are moved and can't be found later.
What is the speaker's current job and how do they feel about it?
-The speaker works at Burger King and expresses pride in working to make a living for their family, despite the challenges they face.
Why does the speaker walk to work, and what reactions do they receive from others?
-The speaker walks 10.5 miles to work because they don’t have a car or a driver’s license. They feel mistreated by others, who mock them by calling them 'trashy.'
What are the speaker's aspirations for the future?
-The speaker hopes to go to college to become a schoolteacher, a goal they've had since they were five years old.
How does the speaker's son view them, and what impact does this have on the family dynamic?
-The speaker's son sees himself as 'high class' and better than the rest of the family, particularly criticizing the speaker's work uniform and distancing himself from his brother.
How does the speaker's other son feel about his brother, and what does he aspire to be like?
-The other son wishes to be more popular like his brother. He wants to go to college, possibly to become a lawyer or study architectural design.
What are some of the challenges the speaker faces with their car?
-The speaker's car has wiring issues that prevent them from using the lights, and they also need new tires. They're trying to get it fixed so they can use it for transportation.

Outlines

00:00

🏠 Struggles with Home and Social Image

The speaker expresses embarrassment about living in a disorganized trailer, concerned about what friends might think. They appreciate their partner’s help around the house but feel frustrated when things are misplaced. They avoid introducing their mother to others due to her unkempt appearance, fearing that people focus on looks over behavior. The speaker highlights the challenges of maintaining their home, lacking basic amenities like a furnace, and a strained relationship with their mother, leading to frequent arguments. Despite their poor upbringing, they take pride in their hard-working father, hoping to make a better life for their own children while working at Burger King.

05:02

👔 Family Expectations and Personal Aspirations

The speaker talks about their discomfort with how their mother dresses, especially her constant wearing of her Burger King uniform, which causes embarrassment. Their son sees himself as more sophisticated, distancing himself from the family due to his perceived social status. The speaker describes their brother’s similar behavior, noting that his desire to appear higher class influences how he interacts with others. The speaker reveals ambitions to attend college and pursue either law or architectural design, despite challenges like a broken-down car. They strive to improve their situation for their children while acknowledging ongoing struggles.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Embarrassment

Embarrassment is a central emotion in the script, particularly around socioeconomic status and appearance. The character feels ashamed of their home, yard, and even their mother’s appearance, which they believe may invite judgment from others. This feeling reflects the stigma and societal pressure placed on individuals based on external factors.

💡Poverty

Poverty is a recurring theme in the video, depicted through the struggles of living in a trailer, the lack of proper clothing, and the challenges in maintaining a clean household. The character expresses frustration with their financial situation, showing how poverty affects their self-worth and social interactions.

💡Social Class

Social class is a significant concept in the video, as the characters discuss their perceived lower status compared to others. There’s a distinction made between 'classes,' and how it affects relationships, behaviors, and self-perception. The character talks about not wanting friends to know where they live, highlighting class-related insecurities.

💡Appearance

Appearance plays a crucial role in the video, influencing how the characters feel they are judged by others. The mother’s attire (Burger King uniform) and general disheveled look cause embarrassment for her children, reflecting the importance placed on looks in determining social value and acceptance.

💡Family Tension

Family tension is evident throughout the script, with characters frequently arguing or feeling disconnected. The son, for example, distances himself from his brother based on how he dresses, while arguments with the mother about tidiness and behavior create further strain. These conflicts reveal the emotional impact of their difficult living conditions.

💡Work Ethic

Work ethic is a recurring topic, as characters try to better their circumstances despite the challenges. The mother works at Burger King and dreams of going to college to become a teacher. Despite her efforts, she faces judgment from both society and her own family for working low-wage jobs and wearing her work uniform frequently.

💡Hope

Hope is a subtle but important theme, particularly expressed through the aspirations of the mother who dreams of improving her life by going to college. Despite their hardships, the characters still talk about future goals, like the son’s ambition to study architecture or law.

💡Judgment

Judgment is a significant force in the video, as the characters feel scrutinized by others based on their appearance, lifestyle, and socioeconomic status. The son feels judged for walking to work and being called 'trashy,' while the mother is concerned about how people perceive her due to her appearance.

💡Self-Worth

Self-worth is explored in how the characters perceive themselves and how they believe others perceive them. The son’s embarrassment about his mother’s appearance and their living conditions reflects a sense of low self-esteem shaped by societal expectations and judgment. At the same time, the mother tries to instill pride in working hard despite their financial struggles.

💡Dreams

Dreams are a counterpoint to the challenges faced by the characters. The mother’s dream of going to college and becoming a teacher, as well as her son’s desire to study architecture, represent aspirations that provide a sense of purpose and hope, despite the limitations imposed by their current life situation.

Highlights

Embarrassment about living conditions and reluctance to show friends the trailer home due to its state.

Despite issues with the home, there is a sense of attachment to it shared between the speaker and their mom.

Appreciation for the help provided by the son, although frustration arises when things are moved out of place.

Self-consciousness about the mother’s appearance and how others perceive her based on looks rather than behavior.

Struggles with maintaining the home, including a lack of a furnace and piles of junk in the yard.

A candid admission of laziness as the reason for not cleaning up, describing the tendency to be a 'couch potato.'

The speaker grew up poor, with a hardworking father who worked for 27 years to support a large family of 22 kids.

Pride in their father’s work ethic and belief that he would be proud of the speaker’s efforts to support their own family.

Challenges of walking 10.5 miles to work at Burger King due to not having a car or a driver's license.

Frustration with being called 'trashy' by others while walking to work, and a desire for respect and happiness.

Embarrassment felt by the speaker’s child about their mother always wearing a Burger King uniform, even to nice restaurants.

A sense of superiority felt by the speaker’s child, believing themselves to be 'high class' and better than their siblings.

Desire from a sibling to emulate their brother’s popularity and achievements, including aspirations for college and a career.

Career goals of studying architectural design or law, with ambitions to attend a local college for training.

Ongoing struggles with car maintenance, including issues with wiring and tires, as part of a broader effort to improve the family’s situation.