If He's Pulling Away, Breakup With Him - Psychological Dating Hacks

Summary

The video script discusses relationship advice, emphasizing preemptive breakups to avoid a dying relationship and the importance of knowing when to end things. It also covers how to create better conversations by assuming comfort and familiarity, making emotional impressions, and the power of excitement in meeting new people. The speaker shares insights on forgiveness, giving advice, and the impact of body language on trust. The script concludes with a pitch for a course that teaches blending masculine and feminine energies to improve various aspects of life.

Takeaways

• 💔 **Preemptive Breakup**: If you sense a relationship is dying, consider breaking up first to avoid a painful end.
• 🔄 **Reactivating Attraction**: Breaking up might make your partner want you back, increasing their efforts to impress you.
• 🗣️ **Conversation Dynamics**: Engage in conversations as if you know the person to create a comfortable atmosphere.
• 🤝 **Building Rapport**: Break rapport occasionally to create a dynamic that can make the other person want to regain your approval.
• 😃 **Making a Good Impression**: Focus on making others feel good rather than trying to impress them with what you say.
• 🤗 **Meeting New People**: Feel genuinely excited when meeting someone new to transmit positive energy.
• 🙏 **Forgiveness**: Forgive those who offend you to remove bitterness and maintain a positive outlook.
• 📈 **Showing Results**: Respond to advice with results to validate the advisor and build a stronger relationship.
• 👀 **Eye Contact**: Make strong eye contact to appear more trustworthy and reliable.
• 🤔 **Curiosity**: Pique curiosity in others to gain their full attention and interest.
• 🎁 **Reciprocity**: Be the first to be honest or give a gift to increase the chances of receiving the same in return.

Q & A

What is the advice given for preemptively breaking up in a relationship that feels off?

The advice is to do a preemptive breakup if you feel the relationship is dying and conversations are forced. This can save time and emotional distress, as it either leads to an acceptance of the breakup, indicating the relationship was already on a downward spiral, or it might make the other person want you back more, showing they truly value you.

How can assuming you know someone improve conversations?

Assuming you know someone can lead to more natural and comfortable interactions. It changes your behavior to be more open and familiar, which can make the other person feel known and understood, thus fostering better conversations.

What is the significance of breaking rapport in building relationships?

Breaking rapport involves creating a temporary discomfort after establishing a connection to make the other person feel like they've lost something. This can make them work to regain your approval, deepening the interaction and creating a more memorable impression.

Why is it beneficial to feel excited when meeting someone new?

Feeling excited when meeting someone new can make the other person feel excited too. This positive energy can create a warm and welcoming atmosphere, making the interaction more enjoyable and memorable for both parties.

What is the impact of forgiving someone who has offended you?

Forgiving someone who offends you removes bitterness and negative emotions from your heart. It allows you to feel compassion and maintain a positive outlook, rather than letting the offense define your interactions and emotions.

How can you show gratitude to someone who gives you advice?

Showing gratitude for advice involves coming back to the advisor with results or feedback, regardless of whether the advice worked or not. This validates the advisor's input and can strengthen your relationship with them.

What is the importance of making eye contact when trying to appear trustworthy?

Making strong eye contact is crucial for appearing trustworthy because it signals honesty and confidence. People tend to look away or blink more when they lie, so maintaining eye contact can counteract these behaviors and build trust.

How can you get someone to be more attentive to what you're saying?

To get someone to be more attentive, you can create a sense of curiosity by saying something surprising and then pausing for their reaction. This piques their interest and makes them more likely to listen intently to what you have to say.

What is the strategy behind being honest first if you want someone to be honest with you?

Being honest first can encourage reciprocation, as it sets a tone of openness and trust. It increases the likelihood that the other person will feel comfortable enough to be honest in return.

How does giving a gift influence the likelihood of receiving one in return?

Giving a gift creates a sense of obligation or desire to reciprocate, often leading the recipient to give a gift back, and typically one of greater value. This is based on the principle of social reciprocity.

What are the key topics covered in the proposed course for personal development?

The course covers topics such as establishing a strong masculine foundation, embracing feminine energy, navigating male and female friendships, releasing the burden of the past, and increasing observational power to read people better.

Outlines

00:00

💔 Preemptive Breakups and Building Rapport

The speaker suggests that if you sense a relationship is failing, it might be best to initiate a breakup preemptively. This approach can save time and emotional turmoil if the other party was unlikely to fight for the relationship. They also discuss the importance of behaving as if you know the person you're interacting with to build rapport and make them feel comfortable. This can lead to better conversations and connections. The speaker shares personal anecdotes about approaching people with the assumption of familiarity, which often leads to more genuine interactions.

05:00

🤗 Creating Excitement and Forgiveness

The speaker emphasizes the power of feeling and showing excitement when meeting someone new, which can create a positive and welcoming atmosphere. They also talk about the importance of forgiveness when someone offends you, suggesting that holding onto offense can negatively impact your life. Instead, they recommend responding with compassion and understanding, which can lead to personal emotional freedom and a more positive outlook on life.

10:01

🤔 Curiosity, Honesty, and Influence

This paragraph discusses various techniques for engaging with others, such as creating curiosity by withholding information to pique interest, being the first to be honest to encourage reciprocal honesty, and the concept of giving to receive. The speaker also introduces a course that they plan to create for their nieces, which will cover topics like establishing a strong masculine foundation, embracing feminine energy, and navigating personal and professional relationships. The course aims to help individuals improve various aspects of their lives by understanding and balancing masculine and feminine energies.

Keywords

💡Preemptive Breakup

A preemptive breakup refers to the act of ending a relationship before it reaches a point of inevitable failure. In the video, the concept is presented as a strategy to avoid emotional pain and wasted time. It's suggested that if a person feels the relationship is dying and conversations are forced, they should consider breaking up before the other person does. The preemptive breakup is framed as a way to take control of the situation and potentially save face.

💡Attraction

Attraction in this context is used to describe the dynamic where a person becomes more desirable when they are perceived as potentially unavailable. The script mentions that if someone breaks up with their partner and the partner genuinely likes them, they may become more attractive because the fear of loss is triggered. This concept is used to illustrate how human emotions can influence attraction.

💡Assumption of Comfort

The assumption of comfort is a social technique where one acts as if they already know the person they are interacting with, thereby creating a sense of familiarity and ease. The video suggests that this can lead to more natural and enjoyable conversations. It is used as a strategy to make others feel at ease and to establish rapport quickly.

💡Rapport

Rapport refers to a harmonious relationship or understanding between people. In the script, building rapport is discussed as a way to establish a connection, but then 'breaking rapport' is introduced as a tactic to create intrigue and deepen the interaction. This involves creating a temporary discomfort to make the person feel like they've lost something, prompting them to work to regain the connection.

💡Emotional Responses

Emotional responses are reactions that are driven by emotions rather than logic. The video emphasizes the importance of eliciting emotional responses to create a memorable impression. It suggests that people are more likely to remember interactions that are emotionally charged, which is why inducing various emotions is a key strategy in the advice given.

💡Forgiveness

Forgiveness is the act of pardoning or ceasing to hold a grudge against someone for a wrong they have committed. The script encourages viewers to forgive those who offend them to avoid internalizing negativity. It is presented as a way to maintain personal peace and to prevent allowing others' actions from affecting one's happiness.

💡Results

Results, in the context of the video, refer to the outcomes or consequences of actions taken, particularly in response to advice given. The speaker suggests that when someone gives advice, one should回馈 with the results of implementing that advice, whether positive or negative. This is seen as a way to validate the advisor and to foster a relationship based on trust and reciprocity.

💡Body Language

Body language consists of the gestures, postures, and movements made by the body that communicate nonverbally. The script mentions changing one's body language as a way to gauge whether someone is truly listening or just pretending to be engaged in a conversation. Mirroring body language is suggested as an indicator of active listening and interest.

💡Trustworthiness

Trustworthiness is the quality of being trustworthy or reliable. In the video, it is associated with making eye contact, which is said to be an underrated way to appear more trustworthy. The script suggests that people who lie tend to look away or blink more, so maintaining eye contact can counteract this and project honesty and reliability.

💡Curiosity

Curiosity is a natural desire to know or learn something. The video advises using curiosity as a tool to engage others in conversation. By creating a sense of intrigue or surprise, one can capture the attention of the listener and make them more receptive to what is being said. This technique is likened to the suspense of a movie that keeps viewers watching to the end.

💡Honesty

Honesty is the quality of being truthful and sincere. The script recommends being the first to be honest as a way to encourage reciprocity. It suggests that if you want someone to be honest with you or to share a secret, you should do the same. This approach is based on the idea that openness can foster a deeper level of trust and connection.

Highlights

Preemptive breakup can save time and emotional distress if the relationship is inevitably ending.

If you break up with someone and they genuinely like you, they may want you back, increasing their attraction.

Feeling like you know the person you're interacting with can lead to more comfortable and natural conversations.

Assume comfort to make others feel at ease and build rapport quickly.

Breaking rapport by creating a dynamic of push and pull can make interactions more engaging.

Meeting someone new with excitement can make them feel excited to meet you too.

Forgiving someone who offends you can remove bitterness and improve your emotional state.

Responding to advice with results can validate the advisor and strengthen your relationship.

Changing body language can indicate whether someone is truly listening or just pretending.

Making strong eye contact can make you appear more trustworthy.

Creating curiosity in a conversation can make people more attentive to what you're saying.

Being honest first can encourage others to be honest with you.

Giving a gift can make people feel compelled to give a gift in return, often better than the original.

Learning to balance masculine and feminine energy can improve various aspects of life.

The course will teach how to establish a strong masculine foundation without harming feminine energy.

Embracing feminine energy involves developing self-awareness and mastering voice and facial expressions.

Navigating male and female friendships will be discussed, including how to identify different types of friends.

The course will help release the burden of the past and stop destructive mental projections.

Increasing observational power can improve the ability to read people better.

The course is available for pre-order at a discounted price before its official release.

Transcripts

feel like the relationship is going to

shits break up with them one of the best

things to do is that you know that you

know that moment when you know the

relationship is dying you know like the

relationship is not like holy [ __ ] like

something's off the conversations feel

forced and all that sort of stuff if you

feel like your relationship is not where

you want it to be a simple solution and

risky solution but simple solution is do

the preemptive breakup break up with

them first break up with them and say

I'm I'm just not happy in this

relationship what's gonna happen is that

either they're going to accept it okay

and and if they say yeah then then guess

what it was inevitable like they really

didn't like you you're saving yourself

the time and look I know emotionally is

hard emotionally is very difficult to

realize that but you're saving yourself

the time most people won't do this but

it's the best thing to do I wish I I

would have done it when I had the chance

to and the other thing is that um you

break up with them and um and if they

really if they if if if they really

actually like you what's going to happen

is that if you break up with them

they're going to want you back they're

going to say please don't do it please

don't do it and they actually become

more attractive to you because they

thought they were going to lose you one

of the best ways to have better

conversation is to Simply feel as though

you know the person why because when you

feel as though you know the

person you actually start behaving in a

way that'll make them feel as though

they know you it's one of the craziest

things like people there were so many

times when I would approach a girl and

they'll tell me you're tell like they'll

tell me that this the interaction action

the interaction was as though I knew the

person for a while and even better

people who people who would see me

approach would think that I knew them

for a while and they they'll see them

rejecting me and they'll think that it

went well why because by simply assuming

Comfort people feel comfortable when you

see someone don't don't feel as though

you don't know them feel as though you

know them hey what's up Tommy how you

doing Tommy how's it going oh yo you

from around here a [ __ ] yo um where were

you at where you at before is Oh

California ah man y I need to move there

one day man yeah man I'm tired of New

York City bro like this [ __ ] is too much

man what you came to New York City for

though and then you just start talking

but the thing is that feel as though you

know them why because your brain has a

certain your brain has a certain

personality for people who you don't

know and it's usually awkward all right

but you usually have a certain

personality that's why people say be

yourself but the problem is that we have

different personalities for different

situations so you usually have a

personality which is the most attractive

one when you know the person person but

that's all up to you that's all up to

the way that you perceive the person

because there have been people that we

known for many years we don't see them

for many years and we come back and and

we feel as though we don't know them

it's not that bound no more the only

difference is not that the person

changed is that your perception of them

changed or they or they changed but the

whole point is that if you change your

perception you're going to change the

way you behave so feeling as though you

know them feeling as though you don't

you already have comfort makes the

Comfort it's one of those paradoxes it's

it's one of the most most powerful

techniques that I use and I still use um

even until today um all right number 27

a good impression is all about how you

make the person feels all right so

simply stop focusing on making the

person feel good and focus no stop

focusing on trying to impress them

simply focus on making them feel good

and making them have fun all right so

it's not about what you say remember

like I said earlier that's why I told

you guys to shut the [ __ ] up I love

saying

that because it's not about what you say

it's about how you make them feel so if

you help them make if you make them feel

good they're going to like you more

that's all what a good impression is all

about so the way to do it this is to

Simply let them talk about the things

that they enjoy and also break Rapport

for example breaking Rapport is when is

when you build some Rapport when you

feel like this when you feel like you

have some comfort right and then you

break that comfort for example um asking

them where you from um California holy

[ __ ] I would have never guessed you from

California and though I say why I don't

know you look like from New York City

you just had you just had like a resting

[ __ ] face but you you're you're a very

nice person though like you look very

mean but you're nice see that that's

breaking Rapport like you gave them a

backand of com you look like you have a

resting [ __ ] face but you're not so

they can't really get mad at you um so

breaking report is kind of like a way to

to [ __ ] with them another way you can

break a report is to um is to be hot and

cold warm and cold um push him um push

him away and then pull them to you like

I like I um I love you I hate you love

you I hate you you know that little

Dynamics that's how you break Rapport

and so what's going to happen is that

because you're breaking that Rapport

they're going to feel like they lost

something and because they feel like

they lost something they'll work to

regain it all right and so and but and

that and those are all emotional

responses and so the more emotions you

make the person feel the more of an

impression they're going to have on you

the most memorable people and the most

memorable um events in our lives are

usually the ones that involve the most

emotions all right number 28 when

meeting someone new feel exced excited

so when you meet someone new actually

feel excited remember mer neurons if you

actually feel excited to meet someone

they're going to feel excited to meet

you you feel you feel it in their energy

and this is one of the most powerful

techniques because it's one of those

things that people forget to do hey

what's up man what's up no [ __ ] that

[ __ ] man hey how you doing come here yo

no [ __ ] that give me a hug man like feel

as feel as though you actually know them

and if you feel that compassion like you

see them as though you see them as

though it's a long long lost fan that

you haven't seen in a good while they're

going be like what do I know him but

they're actually going to feel good

because of the positive attention that

you given them it's I love doing that

and when I meet people that's how I

actually greet them with with with

actual warmth in my heart right oh you

want you to be here it's like dogs you

know when they see you they feel excited

and they run towards you and they want

to give you a hug and they want to be

around you and all that sort of stuff oh

oh sorry sorry sorry it growled all

right number 29 if someone's being a

[ __ ] to you forgive

them the worst thing in the world is

being offended because you keep that

inside it becomes a thorn and you

revolve your life around that thorn in

order not to feel offended you put

Shields around that or Shields around

that thorn rather than taking out the

thorn you take you you you you take the

[ __ ] move and you create a life where

you're not offended you make sure not to

hang around people who offend you you

make sure not to watch look at the

channels the YouTube channels that talk

that has contradicting beliefs what I

want you to do is when someone does

something stupid or offends you in your

mind just forgive them just say oh man

like you know what I forgive you man you

you you don't know what you're doing man

I forgive you you actually got to know

me you like me so you know what I

forgive you see them as though they're

actually like people who don't know what

they doing like Jesus in the cross

forgive them Father for they they know

not what they do something like that

right and so what what things to happen

is that you actually feel good you

actually feel compassion for the person

you take away the vitual from your heart

all of the bitterness and you actually

feel good you know I love doing that

that's what I do sometimes not most of

the time not when I play basketball [ __ ]

those [ __ ] um 30 if someone gives you

advice come back them come back with to

them with results hint hint so I'm not

saying you guys to do you know I'm not

telling you guys to do something you

know but I'm just saying that if

somebody ever gives you advice

especially if there's someone who's like

higher level than you and can actually

give you something in life like like you

know a

career come back to them with the

results come back to them with feedback

nothing's better than saying yo like you

remember that advice you gave me it

didn't work but I did this it doesn't

matter if it did or did did not work

asking them for advice will give them

will actually will actually give you

something to return to and also it'll

increase their self-esteem and validate

them because their advice worked I'm not

lying I'm not lying to you guys when you

guys give me you you guys send me emails

and say look this actually worked I

actually feel good it feels good it

really really really does it's like

watching people eat the food that you

enjoy that you made want to know if if

someone's actually listening change your

body language people who have people who

have report and who are in sync if

somebody changes their body language

everyone else would change their body

language all right so if you want to

know whether someone's actually

listening or whether someone's actually

just Faking It just change your body

language change just go like that and

notice if they if they mirror you if

they mirror you that means that they're

listening and that means that they're

interested if they don't mirror you that

means that there's a connection and and

both of you guys are not really having a

conversation because it's kind of like

Pokemon when you trade Pokemons when you

trade poke in Game Boy when you trade

Pokemons they link up all right and so

the and so the same thing is that when

you're when you're when you're in sync

with a person if something changes in

this person it affects the other person

you see so if you guys are not really

reacting to each other intuitively that

means there's no connection you see so

number 20 once once who come across as

more trustworthy make eye contact what

this thing is that when people lie what

happens they look away when people lie

they look away when people lie they

blink more all right so by simply making

stronger eye

contact you become more trustworthy it's

it's eye eye contact is so underrated

holy [ __ ] um number 21 get um get

someone in a curious State all right

when you're meeting someone you have to

get them in a curious state in a state

of who is this person okay so to get

someone's interest into what you have to

say just say this you know what you kind

of surprise

me pause and let them respond and

they'll always say why then now you have

their undivided attention now you get be

like well because but before I say that

yo did you know that blah blah blah blah

for example you you say you know you

kind of surprise me and they say why you

you you act as though you get an answer

but you cut the thread and talk about

something

else well for example um you know you

kind of surprised me well for real why

well before I say that do you know that

blah blah blah blah now what's going to

happen is that deep down deep down

they're like I want to know why I want

to know why I want to know why but

they're listening to you deep down you

already planting in them to listen to

you by using that so they'll pay more

attention to you it's kind of like

watching a show watching a movie for to

watch the end simply because you want to

see the end you become interested in the

middle you see it it's one of those

easiest tactics to use in order to um

get people to listen to you all right um

number 22 be first if you want someone

to be if you want someone to be honest

with you be honest first if you want

someone to reveal a secret to you reveal

a secret to them first now it doesn't

really have to be a secret you could

just say you could just lie and say that

you're really revealing a secret in

reality you're not really revealing a

secret but generally speaking if you

want someone to do something for you do

it first want people to do you a favor

do favor

all right you want people to act to to

feel vulnerable and to open up in a

relationship you open up first because

it it don't increase the likelihood that

the person's going to

reciprocate all right and and chances

are that the reciprocation will be a lot

greater than your input give a gift

people going to feel compelled to give a

gift back but most of the time it's a

better gift that's how usually work all

right ladies and gentlemen if you guys

ever want to learn how to use your

feminine energy to influence people

learn how to use your masculine energy

to become more assertive and also learn

how to blend both energies to improve

your dating life your spiritual life

honestly um your relationship life your

family life your career life this is the

course for you if I had to make a course

for my nieces I have two nieces one is

81 19 and one is 14 15 16 holy [ __ ] oh

my God he's a bad [ __ ] out he he's a

bad uncle get him shut up Melissa you

should get this course right and this is

the course that I will make for them so

for for example watch the curriculum

right in the first week we're going to

be showing you how to establish a strong

masculine foundation without letting it

hurt your feminine energy this masculine

Foundation is a source of who you are

right it's it's your bodyguard without

this your whatever feminine energy you

create will be destroyed by the outside

because your your feem your masculine is

your Shield so we'll talk about goal

setting we'll talk about how to develop

a serious attitude we're going to be

talking about how to um how to use more

logic how to use more oriented behavior

it's more how to be a man you know you

know now the next one is how to embrace

the feminine energy right this one would

this one would teach you about how to

minimize excessive masculine traits

developing self-awareness healing

abundant feminine energy regulating your

emotion mastering voice qualities and

and facial expressions surrendering

control and allowing pain to be felt

this is honestly it's it's it this will

supercharge like like Kaio Ken your m UL

energy after that we have um femininity

in the workplace and how to be feminine

in the workplace without letting people

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um how women on power should behave

versus women who are subordinates in the

workplace and even the dress code these

are this is based on pychology people

it's kind of insane I'm actually excited

about this one the next week we talk

about navigating the Labyrinth of male

and female friendship and this a lot of

women find confusing so we talk about

that and how to identify EnV friends how

to identify the good friends how to keep

M friends and how to keep female friends

week five we talk about how to release

the burden of the past and stop D and

Destroy mental projections this is

actually really powerful um in this and

then week six we talk about how to

increase your observational power so

that you so that you can read people

better um and we have a bunch of bonuses

it the course starts at um n at $99 um

and you guys can pre-order the course

today at $69 before it goes out um if

you're watching this most likely I'm in

The Meditation Retreat so I really most

likely I will be praying for all of you

guys and um just click on the

description down below of the video

right there you'll see it and you could

pre-order that course it's going to be

out by by the end of next month or the

beginning of febru of of March one of

the two people because I have a 10day

retreat to do and I want to I want to

finish the course um after the retreat

because I think the the ideas are going

to be so much better all right man I'll

see you guys later pre-order man I'm

closing the channel