How I hacked online dating | Amy Webb

Summary

Amy Webb, a data-driven individual, faced a series of unsuccessful relationships and decided to apply her analytical skills to finding love. She calculated the probability of meeting 'Mr. Right' in Philadelphia and, dissatisfied with traditional dating, turned to online platforms. After initial failures with algorithm-based matches, she devised a personalized algorithm, considering 72 data points to find a compatible partner. Her strategy led to a successful match, marriage, and a child, proving that a self-created algorithm for love can be effective.

Takeaways

• 🔍 Amy Webb used data analysis to approach her dating life after a series of failed relationships.
• ⏳ She calculated the probability of finding a suitable partner by considering demographic factors and personal preferences.
• 🤔 Initially, she relied on traditional dating and online algorithms but found them lacking in meeting her specific criteria.
• 📊 Webb created a personalized algorithm with 72 data points to better define her ideal partner.
• 📈 She reverse-engineered online dating platforms, treating them as databases to find potential matches.
• 💡 Through market research, she discovered that popular profiles on dating sites were concise, used optimistic language, and had a strategic posting time.
• 📸 She learned that popular profiles also included photos showing some skin, which contrasted with her initial profile.
• 💖 By optimizing her profile based on her research, Webb became the most popular person on the dating site.
• 🎯 Despite the attention, she stuck to her scoring system and eventually met her future husband who exceeded her criteria.
• 👵 Webb's success led her to conclude that there's an algorithm for love, but it's one that individuals must create for themselves based on personal values and desires.

Q & A

What was Amy Webb's main concern after her latest breakup?

Amy Webb was concerned about why her relationships kept failing and wondered what was wrong with her, prompting her to ask for advice from her family and friends.

What advice did Amy Webb's grandmother give her about finding love?

Her grandmother advised her to stop being so picky, date around, and believe that true love would find her when she least expected it.

How did Amy Webb's passion for data influence her approach to dating?

Amy, being someone who constantly thinks about data and algorithms, decided to approach dating analytically, using statistics and data-driven methods to find a suitable partner.

What was the initial math Amy Webb did to figure out her dating pool in Philadelphia?

Amy calculated the number of potential partners in Philadelphia by starting with the city's population of 1.5 million, narrowing it down based on gender, age range, religion, and other preferences, ultimately estimating that there were only 35 possible men she could date.

What did Amy Webb identify as the main problem with online dating algorithms?

Amy realized that while the algorithms worked as intended, the problem was the superficial and inaccurate information users, including herself, provided, leading to poor matches.

How did Amy Webb reverse-engineer the online dating system?

She created her own list of 72 data points that she was looking for in a partner, prioritized them, and built a scoring system to mathematically calculate compatibility before agreeing to date someone.

Why did Amy Webb create fake male profiles, and what data was she trying to gather?

Amy created 10 fake male profiles to gather data on the women who were interested in the type of man she wanted to marry, analyzing both qualitative and quantitative data on their profiles and communication styles.

What did Amy Webb discover about writing an effective online dating profile?

She found that popular users wrote short, well-crafted profiles (around 97 words), used non-specific, optimistic language, and timed their communications strategically, in contrast to her overly detailed and technical approach.

How did Amy Webb’s optimized profile perform after she applied her data-driven adjustments?

After optimizing her profile using the insights from her research, Amy became the most popular person on the dating site, attracting numerous men who wanted to date her.

How did Amy Webb finally meet her husband, and what role did her scoring system play?

Amy met her husband, Thevenin, after he scored 850 points on her system, enough for a date. Their connection deepened over time, and after rescaling his score to 1,050 points, she realized she had finally found the right match.