What Is Shadow Work? - Teal Swan

Summary

Shadow work is the process of integrating unconscious aspects of ourselves into our conscious awareness. It stems from societal and familial pressures that lead us to reject certain parts of our personality, resulting in a split between the conscious and subconscious. Carl Jung termed these hidden parts the 'shadow,' which often contains both negative and positive traits we've disowned. Engaging in shadow work can be challenging as it confronts us with the pain of self-rejection, but it is essential for personal growth and achieving a whole, conscious life.

Takeaways

• 🌑 Shadow work is about becoming aware of the parts of ourselves that have been suppressed or rejected due to societal or familial expectations.
• 👶 We are born whole, but societal pressures during childhood cause us to split our identity into acceptable and unacceptable aspects.
• 🏡 The family perspective plays a significant role in determining what parts of our personality are deemed acceptable or not.
• 🔦 Carl Jung described the 'shadow' as the aspects of a person that are hidden from their own consciousness, both positive and negative.
• 🚫 Suppressing parts of ourselves doesn't make them disappear; they remain in the subconscious, affecting our behavior and decisions.
• 💪 The human shadow often contains disowned or rejected positive aspects, especially in individuals with low self-esteem.
• 👧 An example of positive aspects in the shadow is a girl suppressing her assertiveness to fit into a family that prefers passive behavior.
• 😠 An example of negative aspects in the shadow is a child internalizing anger due to family disapproval, leading to passive-aggressive behavior in adulthood.
• 🔄 The universe presents opportunities for us to confront and reintegrate the rejected aspects of ourselves, leading to personal growth.
• 🌟 Shadow work is essential for spiritual growth and enlightenment, as no one can achieve a higher state of consciousness without confronting their shadow.
• 💖 Ultimately, shadow work is about bringing attention and love to the parts of ourselves that have been previously rejected.

Q & A

What is shadow work?

Shadow work is the process of becoming consciously aware of the aspects of oneself that have been repressed, disowned, or deemed unacceptable due to societal or familial pressures, which reside in the subconscious mind.

Why is the term 'shadow work' potentially misleading?

The term 'shadow work' might be misleading because it can evoke images of dark or sinister activities, but in reality, it refers to the process of integrating the repressed parts of one's personality into conscious awareness, which is not inherently negative or dark.

How does our upbringing influence the development of our shadow?

Our upbringing influences the development of our shadow by teaching us which aspects of ourselves are acceptable and which are not. This learning process causes us to suppress or disown parts of ourselves that are deemed unacceptable by our family or society.

What is the difference between the conscious and subconscious mind as described in the script?

The conscious mind consists of the aspects of ourselves that we are aware of, while the subconscious mind contains aspects that we are not aware of. The shadow refers to the parts of the personality that are in the subconscious and have been repressed or disowned.

Why does Carl Jung refer to the unconscious aspects as the 'shadow'?

Carl Jung refers to the unconscious aspects as the 'shadow' because these parts of the personality are not exposed to the light of consciousness, similar to how objects in darkness are not illuminated and thus remain unseen.

Why does the human shadow contain both negative and positive aspects?

The human shadow contains both negative and positive aspects because individuals tend to suppress or disown qualities they perceive as negative, but also sometimes reject positive traits that do not align with societal or familial expectations.

How can acknowledging the shadow lead to personal growth?

Acknowledging the shadow can lead to personal growth by allowing individuals to reintegrate repressed or disowned parts of themselves, leading to a more whole and authentic self, and improving self-awareness and self-acceptance.

What is an example of a positive trait ending up in the shadow?

An example of a positive trait ending up in the shadow is a girl born with a strong sense of self and assertiveness, but raised in a family that discourages such behavior, leading her to suppress these positive traits to fit in and gain approval.

How can shadow work help in improving relationships?

Shadow work can help improve relationships by bringing unconscious behaviors and emotions to conscious awareness, allowing individuals to address and change patterns that may be harmful to their relationships, such as passive-aggressive behavior stemming from unacknowledged anger.

Why do people resist engaging in shadow work?

People resist shadow work because it requires facing the pain of rejection and the original feelings of having to fracture oneself to gain love and acceptance. It activates survival mechanisms and can feel threatening to one's sense of self.

How is shadow work related to the concept of enlightenment?

Shadow work is related to enlightenment in that it involves bringing unconscious aspects of the self into conscious awareness, which is a necessary step towards self-realization and enlightenment. No one reaches a state of enlightenment without confronting and integrating their shadow.

Outlines

00:00

🌟 Understanding Shadow Work

Shadow work is a psychological concept that involves acknowledging and integrating the parts of ourselves that we have rejected or suppressed due to societal or familial expectations. These aspects, known as the 'shadow,' can be both positive and negative traits that we have disowned to fit into our environment. The paragraph explains that our shadow is not inherently dark or sinister, but rather a part of our psyche that remains unconscious because we have not exposed it to our conscious awareness. It discusses how this process of self-division begins in childhood as a survival mechanism and how Carl Jung's work on the shadow has influenced our understanding of it. The paragraph also provides examples of how both positive traits, like confidence, and negative emotions, like anger, can end up in the shadow and the impact this has on an individual's life and relationships.

05:02

🔍 The Impact of Ignoring the Shadow

This paragraph delves into the consequences of not addressing our shadow selves. It explains that by denying parts of ourselves, we can become unaware of our true nature, leading to behaviors and emotions that we do not understand or recognize. The paragraph illustrates how suppressed anger can manifest as passive-aggressive behavior, causing harm to relationships. It also touches on the resistance people have towards shadow work due to the pain associated with acknowledging and integrating rejected aspects of the self. The paragraph emphasizes that the process of becoming self-aware is not easy, as it involves confronting the original pain of rejection and the fear of losing parts of ourselves. It concludes by stating that the universe supports our journey towards wholeness and that shadow work is essential for spiritual growth and self-realization, suggesting that it is the highest form of 'light work' one can engage in.

Keywords

💡Shadow Work

Shadow Work refers to the process of becoming aware of and integrating the unconscious aspects of one's personality, which are often repressed due to societal or familial expectations. In the video, it is described as a journey towards self-awareness and wholeness, where individuals confront parts of themselves that have been denied or rejected, such as suppressed emotions or disowned talents. The script uses the example of a girl who suppresses her assertiveness to fit into a family that values obedience, illustrating how Shadow Work can help her reclaim her authentic self.

💡Relational Dependency

Relational Dependency in the context of the video signifies the early stage of life where children are entirely dependent on their caregivers for survival, leading them to adopt behaviors and attitudes that align with their family's values. This dependency results in the internalization of certain beliefs about what is acceptable and unacceptable, which can later manifest as the shadow. The video explains how this dependency shapes our initial understanding of self and others, and how it lays the groundwork for the development of the shadow.

💡Wholeness

Wholeness, as discussed in the video, is the natural state of being complete and undivided that humans are born with. However, due to societal conditioning and relational dependency, this wholeness is often disrupted as children learn to suppress certain aspects of themselves to fit in. The video emphasizes the importance of Shadow Work in rediscovering and integrating these suppressed parts to achieve a sense of wholeness and self-acceptance.

💡Conscious and Subconscious

The terms 'Conscious' and 'Subconscious' are used to describe the two parts of the human mind. The conscious mind contains thoughts and feelings of which we are aware, while the subconscious holds those that are hidden from our immediate awareness. The video explains how societal pressures can lead to the suppression of certain aspects into the subconscious, creating a split and leading to the formation of the shadow. The script uses the metaphor of light and darkness to illustrate how aspects of the self become visible (conscious) or hidden (subconscious).

💡Self-Rejection

Self-Rejection in the video is the act of denying or disowning parts of oneself that are deemed unacceptable by societal or familial norms. This process is a form of self-preservation during early development but leads to the creation of the shadow. The video describes self-rejection as the origin of self-hatred and the sense of emptiness that many people feel, as they have rejected aspects of their true selves.

💡Carl Jung

Carl Jung, a prominent psychologist mentioned in the video, is known for his work on the human psyche, including the concepts of the conscious and the unconscious mind. Jung's ideas about the 'shadow' as the part of the self that is hidden from consciousness are central to the understanding of Shadow Work. The video references Jung's contributions to highlight the importance of acknowledging and integrating the shadow for personal growth.

💡Self-Awareness

Self-Awareness, as discussed in the video, is the ability to recognize and understand one's own emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. It is portrayed as a key component of Shadow Work, where individuals must become aware of their subconscious contents to achieve a more authentic and fulfilling life. The video suggests that self-awareness is not a natural state but rather a goal that requires conscious effort, especially in confronting and integrating the shadow.

💡Enlightenment

Enlightenment in the video is referenced as a state of profound spiritual awakening and self-realization. It is mentioned that no one has reached enlightenment without confronting their shadow, implying that Shadow Work is a fundamental aspect of spiritual growth. The video uses enlightenment as an ultimate goal that can be achieved through the process of integrating the shadow and becoming fully conscious.

💡Passive Aggressive Behavior

Passive Aggressive Behavior is described in the video as a way in which suppressed emotions, particularly anger, can manifest. When individuals do not confront their negative emotions, they may express them indirectly in harmful ways. The video provides an example of how someone who has repressed their anger might exhibit passive aggressive behavior, which can damage relationships. Addressing the shadow, including these hidden emotions, can lead to healthier expressions and improved relationships.

💡Survival Mechanisms

Survival Mechanisms are the psychological and behavioral strategies that humans develop to cope with threats or challenges to their well-being. In the context of the video, these mechanisms are activated when individuals confront their shadow, triggering feelings of fear and the sense of being at risk, similar to the original experiences of rejection during childhood. The video explains how these mechanisms can hinder the process of Shadow Work by creating resistance to facing the painful aspects of the self.

Highlights

Shadow work is not about dark or sinister practices, but rather the process of becoming aware of the aspects of ourselves that we have disowned or suppressed.

We are born whole, but societal and familial pressures lead to the suppression of certain aspects of our personalities.

The concept of what is acceptable varies by family and society, leading to the rejection of certain personality traits.

Relational dependency in childhood causes us to disown parts of ourselves to fit in and be approved of by our family.

The division of the self into conscious and subconscious is a form of self-preservation and the first act of self-rejection.

Carl Jung's work with Freud identified the existence of a conscious and subconscious aspect in individuals.

Consciousness is likened to light, making us aware of aspects of ourselves, while the shadow represents the unconscious.

The human shadow includes both negative and positive aspects of a person that are not exposed to consciousness.

People often suppress positive traits like confidence and assertiveness due to societal or familial disapproval.

An example is given of a girl whose assertiveness is suppressed, leading to a life of obedience and internal division.

Negative emotions like anger can also be pushed into the shadow, leading to passive-aggressive behavior in adulthood.

Shadow work involves confronting and integrating the rejected aspects of ourselves to achieve wholeness.

The resistance to shadow work stems from the pain of acknowledging and integrating suppressed parts of the self.

Every human has experienced the process of self-splitting, leading to self-hatred and a sense of emptiness.

The universe provides opportunities for us to confront our shadow and become whole again.

Shadow work is a controversial process, especially within positive focus communities.

Becoming aware of our shadow is key to a consciously aware and free life.

Enlightenment requires confronting one's shadow and exposing it to the light of consciousness.

Shadow work is the highest form of light work, involving bringing attention and love to rejected aspects of ourselves.

Transcripts

Almost every week I receive an email form somebody

who's asking:

What is shadow work?

So today, I'm gonna tell you exactly what shadow work is.

Because of the term "Shadow Work",

it's easy to see how that can conjure up

all kinds of images of dark sinister things.

Perhaps shadow work is a dark spiritual practice,

perhaps it's a process that involves the more negative

or more malevolent aspects of our personality.

The truth is, neither is the case.

So, what exactly is shadow work?

We are born whole.

But that wholeness is short lived

because we're relationally dependent as children.

Being born relationally dependent

into families that socialise us

into a society that is not yet fully evolved,

spells trouble, because it causes us to learn

that some aspects of ourselves are acceptable,

and others are not.

What is acceptable versus unacceptable,

depends upon the perspective of the family you're born into.

The aspects of us that are seen as unacceptable,

both positive and negative,

are rejected by our family,

and the aspects that are seen as acceptable, are not.

So being relationally dependent,

in the name of survival, we do anything we can

to disown and deny and suppress

those aspects in ourselves that are disapproved of,

whilst exaggerating those that are approve of.

We dissociate from what we disapprove of.

This creates a split within a person,

that we call the conscious and the subconscious.

This self preservation instinct

of dividing ourselves into conscious and subconscious,

is in fact, our first act of self rejection.

Years ago, the revolutionary psychologist

Carl Jung was studying with Freud,

and they together,

noticed that people had a conscious aspect and a subconscious aspect.

What that means is,

if you take a person,

they have aspects of themselves they're aware of,

and aspects of themselves that they are entirely unaware of.

Consciousness has long been referred to as a light.

To become aware of something, you have to be able to see it,

the same way that you might see something

that is suddenly illuminated in light.

When something is unconscious,

we can't see it.

We are unaware of it.

The same way that we're unaware of something

that might be in a dark room.

Because that darkness is there, we can not see it.

So, what Carl Jung began to do,

is to refer to the aspects of a person

that they themselves are unaware of,

or unconscious of,

as the shadow.

So, the human shadow,

is any aspect of a person that is not exposed

to the light of their own consciousness.

The reason that the human shadow contains mostly

what we would consider negative things,

is because most of us tend to deny,

suppress, disown and reject,

aspects of ourselves that we feel are negative.

But one of the biggest misconceptions about Shadow Work

is that the negatives is all that's contained in the shadow.

That couldn't be further from the truth.

While we're more likely to suppress jealousy,

than to suppress a particular talent we might have,

the human shadow often contains

disowned or rejected aspects of a person,

that are truly positive.

This is especially true

for people who struggle with shame and low self esteem.

I'll give you an example of how the positive

can end up in the human shadow.

Let's say that a girl is born

with a definite sense of self;

She knows who she is, she knows what she likes,

she knows exactly what she doesn't like,

and she for sure speaks her opinion.

But let's say she came into a family that thinks that little girls

should be seen and not heard.

Little girls should keep sweet.

Little girls should not assert their opinion.

The aspect of her that are confident and assertive,

will be rejected by the family.

So for the sake of survival in the social group,

she will also begin to reject that in herself.

She will deny that aspect of herself,

in order to get love.

To the degree that as an adult,

she will most likely be sweet, quiet and obedient.

Her life will be painful

because she has exiled part of herself.

She is divided.

As an adult,

she may work with someone to discover what feelings

or believes or memories are part of her subconscious,

and discover that she is in fact, confident and assertive.

When she re-owns that aspect of herself,

she will have the confidence to create a life that feels good

and assert herself to those around her,

instead of remain obedient, to those around her.

I will also give you an example

of how the negative ends up in the human shadow.

Let's say you have a child, and that child feels really angry.

But they're born into a family where anger is not okay,

so when they feel angry,

they're shamed for that anger, they're punished for it.

They will try to disown, reject and dissociate themselves,

from that anger in every way that they can.

But the anger doesn't go away,

he just consciously denies it.

It becomes subconscious.

As an adult, this person will most likely

not have any awareness that he has anger in him at all.

He will not and cannot see himself clearly,

because he has denied that aspect of himself.

So when people tell him: "Man, you're really angry,

I can really feel the anger in you."

He will not relate to that at all.

He will probably only relate to himself as easygoing.

If he works with someone to discover the feelings,

beliefs and memories that are part of his subconscious,

he may discover that he really is angry.

And that that anger, has been coming out all along,

in passive aggressive ways

and hurting the people around him.

If he addresses the anger directly,

his passive aggressive behavior will cease to exist

and his relationships will become much more enjoyable.

When we deny, suppress, or disown something,

it doesn't disappear.

It just fades from our conscious awareness.

This is the real reason why we do so many things in life

that we don't understand why we're doing.

It's why we're still completely out of control of ourselves.

We're adults.

We have conscious minds,

we should be able to do this better,

and yet we keep falling into the same patterns,

doing the same crap.

That's because of your shadow.

Here's the number one reason though,

that people resist shadow work;

To acknowledge something

that you have suppressed into your subconscious mind

because you've rejected it, or disowned it, or denied it,

then you must come face to face with the pain

of having had to fracture yourself,

and lose an aspect of yourself,

for the sake of being loved.

The original pain of rejection

will come up every time you do that shadow work,

In other words, it will bring up the same feeling of rejection

that we were met with, the first time around,

from our parents and caregivers.

And so it makes us feel like

we're going to be exiled or punished again.

It sets off our survival mechanisms,

and thus makes us feel like we're quite literally, going to die.

No wonder self awareness isn't so easy to attain!

~ Laughter ~

Every human in existence that was ever socialized,

which is pretty much everyone on earth,

has gone through this process of splitting themselves into parts.

Splitting themselves into conscious and subconscious.

This self rejection is the birth of self hate.

And the emptiness that we feel,

is the remainder that's left over,

of those aspects of ourselves that we have suppressed,

and denied, and disowned,

and thus lost.

But the entire universe is on our side

to try to help us to become whole again.

Every process in the universe

is headed in the direction of growth and expansion.

And so, the self that is fractured,

seeks to become re-unified.

We will be presented with every single opportunity,

to see the aspects of ourselves

that we have rejected and denied and disowned.

We will be provided every single opportunity,

to confront our shadow self.

So it doesn't really matter how far we run,

or how well we think we might hide,

our shadow will keep chasing us,

until we are willing to do the work, that must be done with it.

This is really what Shadow Work is all about.

It's about conscientiously doing the work

of becoming conscious of what has become unconscious.

Now, unfortunately,

Shadow Work has become a rather controversial process,

especially in the positive focus community.

For this reason,

I want you, if you're watching this video,

to also watch my YouTube video that's titled:

Shadow Work Verses Positive Focus.

Shadow work can be painful.

It is true.

Self awareness does not come naturally

those who make a practice of avoiding pain,

because to become aware of those aspects,

you must stop trying to escape the pain and emptiness within you,

where those missing parts should be,

but it is also the key to a consciously aware and free life.

Shadow work is now a term often used in spiritual and psychology circles

to describe any process, of which there are thousands,

to make this subconscious conscious.

And the more aware you are of your shadow,

the more embodied you are as a conscious being.

No one ever reached enlightenment without confronting their shadow,

and exposing it to the light of consciousness.

Ultimately, shadow work is the work of bringing attention

and love to those aspects of yourself,

that have previously been rejected.

So if you ask me,

shadow work is in fact, the highest form of light work

that you can do.

Have a good week.