How To Subtly Attract Your Crush

Dating Ins and Outs (PODCAST)
28 May 202304:53

Summary

TLDRIn the video, based on Robert Greene's book 'The Art of Seduction,' various scientific strategies are discussed to attract a crush. For women, smiling is attractive, while men should maintain a mysterious persona. Both genders are perceived as attractive when expressing shame. The approach to a crush varies by gender, with men preferring a side approach and women a direct one. Humor plays a role, with men valuing a partner who laughs at their jokes and women appreciating someone who can make them laugh. Subtle physical touch, like a light arm touch, can also increase attraction. The video emphasizes the importance of authenticity over manipulation in forming genuine relationships.

Takeaways

  • 😌 Smiling can be perceived differently based on gender, with women appearing more attractive when smiling and men when adopting a 'cool and mysterious' persona.
  • 🙈 The expression of shame, characterized by a downward gaze and a modest posture, is found to be universally attractive regardless of gender.
  • 🤔 When approaching a crush, the strategy should vary by gender: sit beside a man and across from a woman to increase the chances of a positive interaction.
  • 😄 A sense of humor is essential, but it's crucial to understand that men and women may define it differently, with men valuing being laughed at and women valuing making others laugh.
  • 😂 Laughter is a key component in attraction; for men, having their jokes laughed at is appealing, while women are drawn to those who can make them laugh.
  • 🤝 The incorporation of subtle physical touch, such as a light touch on the arm, can significantly increase the likelihood of a positive response from a crush.
  • 🤗 Physical touch should be used judiciously, taking into account the relationship, personal boundaries, and cultural norms.
  • 🧠 The video emphasizes that these tips are based on scientific research but may not apply universally, especially considering the primary focus on heterosexual dynamics.
  • 💡 The video encourages viewers to share their own experiences and perspectives to foster an open and inclusive conversation about attraction strategies.
  • 💖 Above all, the video suggests that authenticity is key in attracting a crush and building a genuine relationship.

Q & A

  • What is the main theme of Robert Greene's book 'The Art of Seduction'?

    -The main theme of 'The Art of Seduction' is the exploration of various strategies and tactics to influence and attract others, particularly focusing on the power of turning away to make others pursue you.

  • How does the video suggest one should smile when flirting with a crush?

    -The video suggests that while smiling can be perceived as attractive or unattractive depending on gender, a universally attractive expression is one of shame, where the person tilts their head and eyes downwards and narrows their posture.

  • What is the recommended approach when trying to attract a male crush according to the video?

    -To attract a male crush, it is recommended to sit beside them rather than across from them, as male participants in a study had a more negative reaction when approached from the front.

  • How should one approach a female crush to increase attractiveness, as per the video?

    -The video suggests that to attract a female crush, one should sit in front of them, as females did not dislike being approached from the side by a male researcher.

  • What does the video say about the role of humor in attraction?

    -The video indicates that humor plays a significant role in attraction, but it's defined differently by men and women. Women prefer men who can make them laugh, while men prefer women who laugh at their jokes.

  • What is the 'Magic Touch' mentioned in the video and how does it help in attraction?

    -The 'Magic Touch' refers to the subtle use of physical touch, such as a light touch on the arm, which can make one more attractive to their crush according to a study in the Journal of Social Influence.

  • How does the video advise using humor to attract a male crush?

    -To attract a male crush, the video advises laughing at their jokes more often, as men prefer women who appreciate their humor.

  • What should one do to attract a female crush according to the video?

    -To attract a female crush, one should focus on making her laugh, as women define a good sense of humor as someone who can make them laugh.

  • What is the importance of being genuine in attraction according to the video?

    -The video emphasizes that while the tips can help, the best way to attract someone for a genuine relationship is to be oneself and not use these tips to manipulate.

  • How does the video address the limitations of the research presented?

    -The video acknowledges that the research has primarily focused on straight men and women, and may not reflect everyone's experience, inviting viewers with different perspectives to share their thoughts.

  • What is the video's stance on using these attraction tips?

    -The video suggests that these tips should not be used to manipulate a crush but rather to enhance one's natural attractiveness and to foster genuine connections.

Outlines

00:00

💬 The Art of Seduction: Attracting Your Crush

The paragraph discusses strategies for attracting a crush, as outlined in Robert Greene's book 'The Art of Seduction'. It explores whether playing hard to get or being direct is more effective. The video promises to provide scientifically-backed tips to enhance one's attractiveness. It questions the effectiveness of smiling during flirting, noting that its impact varies by gender. A 2011 study in the journal 'Emotion' suggests that while smiling is attractive for women, it's the least attractive for men. Instead, expressing shame is universally attractive regardless of gender. The paragraph also discusses the best approach to sit with your crush, which differs by gender, and the importance of humor in attraction, with men preferring women who laugh at their jokes and vice versa. Lastly, it mentions the 'Magic Touch', suggesting that subtle physical contact can increase attraction.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Seduction

Seduction, in the context of the video, refers to the art of attracting someone's interest or desire, often in a romantic or intimate way. The video discusses various strategies and behaviors that can be employed to increase one's attractiveness to a crush, such as smiling, physical touch, and humor. For instance, the video suggests that for men, a 'cool and mysterious' persona may be more seductive, while for women, smiling and appearing happy is perceived as most attractive.

💡Smiling

Smiling is mentioned as a facial expression that can be either attractive or unattractive depending on gender. The video cites a 2011 study that found women are perceived as most attractive when smiling and looking happy, while for men, smiling was their least attractive expression. This concept is used to illustrate how different genders may use smiling as a tool in seduction, with varying effectiveness.

💡Shame

In the video, 'shame' is discussed as a facial expression that is universally attractive, regardless of gender. It is described as a look where someone has their head and eyes tilted downwards and a narrowed posture. This expression was rated as attractive in the context of the video, suggesting that it can be a subtle and effective way to attract a crush.

💡Approach

The term 'approach' is used to describe the physical positioning one takes when initiating interaction with a crush. The video presents findings from a study that suggest men prefer to be approached from the side, while women prefer a direct approach. This highlights the importance of understanding gender preferences in the art of seduction.

💡Humor

Humor is discussed as a key aspect of attraction, with the video noting that men and women define a 'good sense of humor' differently. For women, it's about being made to laugh, while for men, it's about their humor being appreciated. The video uses this concept to advise viewers on how to use humor to attract their crush, such as laughing at a man's jokes or making a woman laugh.

💡Physical Touch

Physical touch is presented as a subtle yet powerful tool in attraction. The video references a study that found women were more likely to agree to a request if they were lightly touched on the forearm beforehand. This suggests that a gentle touch can enhance one's attractiveness and is a tactic that can be used to increase interest from a crush.

💡Gender Differences

Gender differences are a recurring theme in the video, as it discusses how men and women may perceive attractiveness and seduction differently. For example, the video notes that men and women have different preferences for facial expressions and approaches during initial interactions. Understanding these differences is crucial for effectively applying the video's advice.

💡Facial Expressions

Facial expressions are highlighted as non-verbal cues that can significantly influence attraction. The video explains that certain expressions, like smiling or showing shame, can be more or less attractive depending on the gender of the person displaying them. These expressions are part of the broader strategy of seduction discussed in the video.

💡Research

The video is based on scientific research, which is used to back up the claims and advice given. For instance, studies from the Journal of Emotion and the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology are cited to provide evidence for the effectiveness of certain seduction techniques. This reliance on research lends credibility to the video's advice.

💡Cultural Norms

Cultural norms are briefly mentioned as a factor that can influence the effectiveness of seduction techniques, such as physical touch. The video suggests that while light touches on the arm can be attractive, it's important to consider the cultural context and personal boundaries. This shows an awareness that the advice given must be adapted to different social environments.

💡Authenticity

Authenticity is emphasized as the ultimate key to attracting someone in a genuine relationship. The video concludes by advising viewers not to use the tips for manipulation but to be themselves. This underscores the idea that while the video provides strategies, the foundation of any relationship should be honesty and true self-expression.

Highlights

The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene suggests that the ability to delay satisfaction can be a powerful tool in seduction.

Smiling can be perceived differently based on gender, with implications for how it affects attractiveness.

For women, smiling and appearing happy is considered the most attractive expression.

Conversely, for men, not smiling and maintaining a cool and mysterious persona is more attractive.

Expressing shame through body language can be universally attractive, regardless of gender.

When approaching a crush, the strategy should differ based on their gender, with men preferring a side approach and women a direct one.

A sense of humor is important, but it's defined differently by men and women.

Women prefer men who can make them laugh, while men prefer women who appreciate their humor.

Physical touch, when subtle and appropriate, can increase attractiveness and the likelihood of a positive response.

Tips should not be used to manipulate but rather to enhance genuine attraction and build a real relationship.

The video encourages viewers to share their own attraction tips and experiences in the comments.

The video acknowledges that scientific research has primarily focused on straight men and women, and may not reflect everyone's experience.

An open and inclusive conversation is invited for those with perspectives not covered in the video.

The video concludes by reminding viewers of the importance of being genuine in attracting a crush.

Transcripts

play00:00

in his International best-selling book

play00:02

The Art of Seduction Robert Greene wrote

play00:04

your greatest power and seduction is

play00:07

your ability to turn away to make others

play00:09

come after you delaying their

play00:11

satisfaction do you think playing hard

play00:13

to get works best or do you prefer to be

play00:15

direct

play00:16

it can be difficult to figure out the

play00:18

best way to attract your crush by the

play00:20

end of this video you'll learn tips

play00:22

backed by scientific research that will

play00:24

teach you how to step up your game and

play00:26

keep them interested here's how to

play00:28

attract your crush and leave them

play00:29

wanting more

play00:31

to smile or not to smile

play00:33

when you're flirting with your crush you

play00:35

should smile to come across as

play00:36

approachable and show them that you're

play00:38

interested or should you research shows

play00:42

that it might not be that simple smiling

play00:44

can be perceived as either attractive or

play00:46

unattractive and this depends on your

play00:48

gender but there's one expression that

play00:50

seems to be universally attractive

play00:51

regardless of gender and it's probably

play00:54

not what you think

play00:55

in a 2011 study published in the journal

play00:58

emotion women were perceived as most

play01:00

attractive when they were smiling and

play01:02

looked happy for men the results were

play01:05

the complete opposite smiling was their

play01:07

least attractive facial expression so if

play01:10

you're a man the cool and mysterious

play01:12

Persona may be more seductive to your

play01:14

crush but there was one facial

play01:16

expression that was perceived as

play01:17

relatively attractive regardless of

play01:19

gender

play01:20

shame when someone had their head and

play01:24

eyes tilted downwards and narrowed their

play01:25

posture expressing shame they were rated

play01:28

as attractive whether they were male or

play01:30

female when you're with your crush see

play01:32

how they react when you innocently look

play01:34

down or avert your gaze every once in a

play01:36

while it just might help attract them to

play01:38

you

play01:39

the right approach imagine your crush is

play01:42

sitting in an empty table at school now

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is your chance to make a move

play01:46

when you go up to your crush to talk to

play01:48

them should you approach them from the

play01:50

front and sit across from them or sit

play01:52

beside them turns out like a lot of

play01:55

other attraction strategies the answer

play01:57

depends on your crush's gender in a

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study published in the Journal of

play02:00

Personality and Social Psychology

play02:02

participants were approached by a

play02:04

researcher who sat either beside them or

play02:06

directly in front of them results showed

play02:08

that male participants had a more

play02:10

negative reaction when a female

play02:11

researcher approached them from the

play02:13

front on the other hand females didn't

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like being approached from the side by a

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male researcher according to these

play02:19

findings if you're trying to attract a

play02:21

man the best way to approach them is to

play02:23

sit beside them rather than across from

play02:24

them but if your crush is a woman go

play02:27

with the head-on strategy and sit in

play02:29

front of them it's such a subtle move

play02:31

they won't even know you're doing it got

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jokes does your crush have a good sense

play02:36

of humor more importantly do you

play02:38

philosopher William James once said

play02:41

common sense and a sense of humor are

play02:44

the same thing

play02:45

moving at different speeds a sense of

play02:47

humor is just common sense dancing

play02:49

however researcher Eric Bressler at

play02:52

McMaster University found that men and

play02:54

women Define humor differently knowing

play02:56

this can help you step up your seduction

play02:58

game wrestler found that woman defined

play03:01

someone with a good sense of humor as

play03:03

someone who could make them laugh and

play03:04

they preferred men who have a good sense

play03:06

of humor 62 of the time conversely men

play03:09

thought someone had a good sense of

play03:11

humor when they appreciated their own

play03:13

humor AKA loved other jokes they

play03:15

preferred women who laughed at their

play03:16

jokes 65 percent of the time the

play03:19

takeaway if your crush is a man you can

play03:21

pique their interest by laughing at

play03:23

their jokes just a little more and if

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your crush is a woman you can attract

play03:27

them by making them laugh rather than

play03:29

laughing at their jokes the Magic Touch

play03:31

combining physical touch with the other

play03:34

tips we've mentioned will make you even

play03:36

more attractive to your crush key is to

play03:38

keep it subtle a 2007 study published in

play03:41

the Journal of Social influence had male

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researchers either ask women for their

play03:45

members or ask them to dance in both

play03:47

cases they found that if they touched a

play03:49

woman's forearm for just one or two

play03:51

seconds before asking her she was more

play03:53

likely to say yes light touches on the

play03:56

arm are an innocent and simple way to

play03:58

attract your crush of course this

play03:59

technique depends on your relationship

play04:01

with them their boundaries and your

play04:03

cultural norms but if you and your crush

play04:05

are comfortable with it giving them a

play04:06

soft touch on the arm every once in a

play04:08

while might be the perfect way to arouse

play04:10

their interest

play04:11

thanks for watching psych2goers we hope

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you found this video helpful remember

play04:15

these tips shouldn't be used to

play04:16

manipulate your crush at the end of the

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day the best way to attract someone if

play04:20

you want a genuine relationship with

play04:22

them is to be yourself will you be

play04:24

trying any of these tips do you have any

play04:27

of your own attraction tips to offer

play04:28

that have worked for you in the past

play04:30

share your ideas in the comments below

play04:32

keep in mind that because scientific

play04:34

research has focused primarily on

play04:35

straight men and women some of the

play04:37

studies in this video Don't reflect

play04:38

everyone's experience if you have a

play04:40

perspective to share that hasn't been

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mentioned we'd love to hear from you and

play04:44

start an open and inclusive conversation

play04:46

please share your thoughts in the

play04:47

comments thanks for watching and see you

play04:49

in the next one

play04:51

[Music]

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関連タグ
Seduction TipsAttraction StrategiesFlirting TechniquesGender DifferencesSocial PsychologyEmotional ExpressionHumor in DatingPhysical TouchCultural NormsAuthenticity in Relationships
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